Funny LARP Stories

[Redfeild]

The 'how I brook a game' thread has inspired me.
Tell us your funny LARP stories.

I played were wolf for the first time. Was not sure what I wanted to play.

The storyteller says, "how bout an NPC".

I says,"OK. So long as it is not to difficult".

He says, "All you have to do is watch and don't get killed"

Now he had been having problems with meta gaming. So I went through the farce of making my first ever were wolf character. Asked a lot of dumb questions. Settled with a name which I used for the NPC. The whole stchick.

So the game goes on. All the were folk are all freaked about some thing and they go about looking for infiltrates. I thought that sort of thing only happened in vampire but I ride with it. No one asks my brand new character jack. I'm pretty much ignored. I play him off as a fresh new werewolf with a lot of questions. Most of them get answered.

Only one guy challenges me the whole night. He is the only guy that bothers to ask if I was who/what I say I am. OK. We throw a challenge. We tie.

"So what are your traits?"

"I win"

"No, you have to compare traits."

"No I don't."

He is getting a little pissed off at this point. He just came over to jack with me for a little bit. Just some random role play. "Why the hell not?".

"Because the story teller said I win all ties."

I will never forget the slow realization and dawning horror I saw on his face. Wish I had a camera. After regaining his composer he says "OK' and avoids me for the rest of the night.

Still don't know what an incarna is but apparently playing one is BA.

Oh yeah! Latter that night, the local pack "saves" me form a group of hunters. I take a shot gun blast and pretend to be hurt for the rest of the night and claim its just a flesh wound when offered healing.

Mission Accomplished! :D

[Peter Svensson]

My first night of playing Vampire. I was the Brujah bodyguard to a Malkavian Elder. Some random Sabbat raid the Elysium, and I'm prepared to be all "I'm the Muscle!" on them. Said Malkavian deals with them all using Voice of Madness in one round of combat.

So then we've got one of them staked, and I'm asked to decapitate it. I make my throw. I lose. I throw again. And lose. I burn all of my physical traits, refresh with Potence and still lose a few more times before I finally get a win and manage to cut the staked Vampire's head off. I had the worst luck EVER.

So a Vampire with a sword just keeps hacking at a staked and immobile body, and misses. Or forgets and uses the wrong side of the sword. Or trips. Everyone else is staring at my complete incompetence, and are asking me "Do you want help with that?" I ignore them, and continue to fail at cutting off the head until finally, I succeed.

He died the next session. He was rather lame.

[pawsplay]

I don't know if this is funny or not.

Same LARP I described in the "broken LARP" thread. I'm a 1st level ranger in a hotel in Hell. My group has been decimated and separated, so I'm wandering around trying not to die.

Some chick in a black velvet dress walks up and starts chatting. I draw my sword. She says, "Oh, you don't need that," and rests her hand on my arm. Now, I've been told there is no grappling, so I ask her to remove her hand.

"Oh, sure," she says. "Life drain, one level," and walks off.

So I'm DEAD.

A while later I get rezzed and go about my business.

After the game, I hook up with my fiance, who's been having troubles of her own with her group. We chat awhile, but she doesn't seem very engaged. We wander up to the vampire LARP she wanted a taste of, but then she doesn't feel like joining in after all. She wants to go home.

"What's wrong?" I ask.

"Nuthin."

We get halfway home, when finally, I just spit out, "What is your deal? You've been in a funk for hours. I thought we were having a good time. We're going home early. Do you feel sick, or what?"

"It's stupid."

"Ok, that's fine. What is it?"

"I saw you flirting with that girl..."

"What girl?"

"You know."

"I have no idea what you are talking about."

"The girl in the velvet dress you were checking out."

"Who?"

"You know. In the LARP. I saw you two talking."

"Oh. Her? She was a vampire and she killed me. That totally pissed me off." At this point, I just started laughing.

My fiance gets a hurt look. "It's not funny. I thought this whole time you had been flirting with her."

"Hon, I wasn't even checking her out. And if she was flirting with me, she needs to learn a thing or two."

[Morrius]

The Adventurer's Guild at one LARP I visited was notoriously clueless. And since I didn't know enough people in the game, they were the ones who took me in. It took some explaning that they really shouldn't give the magic key to their cabin to an NPC no matter how nicely they asked, especially when said NPC is the lead Marshall and playing a race who is well-known for being phenomally evil and untrustworthy. I blew about half my MPs putting up a new lock.

One time there were about a dozen or so Adventurer's Guild members were walking around at night when they heard a noise, something that sounded like growling. It took them about thirty seconds falling all over themselves to draw their weapons, ready spells, and get in a line for combat. Then they look in the direction of the nearby bathroom, and see someone coming out of it. That's right, the noise was a toilet flushing.

[Redfeild]

Yes. Loosing traits was the one great flaw of the old system. It effectively left you with a finite number of actions. How many physical traits did a 13th gen have? 10 was it? Which means at max traits you could only loose 20 times. 10 to burn through them and 10 more after burning a will power. Or am I remembering that wrong?

Still had fun with the old system.

[Fugitive Unknown]

A class of 5 year olds with stakes will totally OWN an 9th gen vampire, no matter what he has. Particualrly if there backed up with kittens.

Lets see..

First game I was in of a LARP, I was around 16. I made my character, and figured I'd talk to the prince about getting some Ventrue representation in the city. Unfortunetly I found it really difficult to get anything done - no one was really interested in talking to me, and the prince wasn't avaialble. No members of my clan in the city and I didn't know anyone at the game to help get involved - not the best experience.

So after about 6 hours, the Prince Gareth Bane finally shows up - only he's covered in blood (the guy's a movie make up artist) and screaming about how a bunch of wolves mauled him - so my character never got a chance to introduce himself, but it was fun to listen to 'em rant. I don't hear about any more games, and I'm not terribily interested in playing.

Fast forward 8 years.

I'm invited to show up at a Camarilla game (still WoD), pretty much the next vampire game I ever played. I talk to one of the players and agree to play his childer. Much more fun, and I know a couple people there out of game, know the rules better, and actually have an in road with a clan that has members.

My first sesssion, this guy comes in and I look hard - it's the same dude from earlier, playing the same character - Gareth Bane. He'd been playing the same character through two global resets for over 8 years.

Another character I have to relay - Mantecca.. the Gorgeous x 5, Flabby x 5 Toredor Chef, who's obession was pure fame (5 dots, High Society 5 as well) Played by a skinny guy who padded his suit in garbage bags. He used his media influence to have himself declared the "Sexiest Man In Canada" and then photoshopped his face, stretching it out and plastering it on the front cover of a newspaper which he took to game.

Or Molly, a sabbat nosferatu bag lady. Her player took a set of value village clothes, covered it in cheap perfume, barbeque sause, and other fun stuff, and then left it in a plastic garbage bag, never washing it once.... the rank was... impressive.

[Carmen]

Does it have to be a story that happened to me? I hope not.

Two groups of friends from the LARP I used to play went up to another chapter. (I was in one of these groups.) We ended up being put in a sort of duplex cabin; there were two distinct sleeping/living areas, each with its own bathroom and door, and there was a dividing wall between them that could be either open or shut. Since both our groups got along reasonably well, we all decided to leave the dividing wall open, trap the bejeezus out of one of the doors, and everybody would use the other one. This worked well for most of us most of the weekend.

The traps were actually set a short space in front of the door. That way, a marshal could open the door to check the OOC notes without setting anything off, but NPC's on a cabin raid would eat hot flaming death before they could strike anyone on a bunk.

So sometime that weekend, Justin (character name) needed to use the restroom. He opened his cabin door, stepped through, closed the door, and stepped towards the bathroom.

SNAP!

Naturally, he opened the trapped door. (Despite being present when the traps were set.)

Naturally, he had low body, little (if any) armor, and no appropriate shields to fend off the damage.

Naturally, he was the only person in either side of the cabin.

So Justin's lying there on the floor, watching the seconds of his death count tick by and reflecting on the hell he was going to catch if he had to rez because of his own traps, when he heard the other (untrapped) door open and footsteps come around the corner. It was one of the other members of his group, "Bob."

("Bob" had a habit of perming his characters early and often, so I don't remember which of his characters this was. Ergo, "Bob" gets an alias.)

Justin thinks, "Yes! It's 'Bob!' I'm saved!"

"Bob" steps over Justin and into the bathroom.

Justin thinks, "What the fuck?!"

You know, that's actually the perfect place to end this story, but what the heck:

The story does have a happy ending. "Bob" saw Justin when he exited the bathroom, realized that Justin was not in the habit of taking a nap on the floor, and got the man some healing before he had to go rez.

[TwoGunBob]

I don't know. I tried a Vampire LARP and did three sessions.

The third session had a few quirks.

All the Camarilla players decided to be come Sabbat between sessions. I literally walked into a meeting a made to excuse myself as I assumed it was a primogen meeting only to find out the five people left of the some odd forty were indeed the entire Camarilla.
Outside the game it was stupider the stupid. Inside the game it was rather funny as the remaining chumps... err... suckers... errr... players that were not friends of the people running the game made a quick scramble to keep me at the meeting.

It was followed later by cats that shoot lightning bolts out their sphincters...

I never made it to the fourth session.

[Carmen]

A class of 5 year olds with stakes will totally OWN an 9th gen vampire, no matter what he has. Particualrly if they're backed up with kittens.

Darn it, Fugitive, you reminded me of another story. :p Fortunately, a much shorter story.

Same LARP as in my last post, but in my (now defunct) home chapter. This was before the event started. People were doing the usual pre-game check in and conversation bit. The General Manager and Logistics Lady's three-year-old daughter was wandering around the building, not getting into any trouble, just talking to everybody. She picked up somebody's sword. One of the teenage boys thought that was just the cutest thing ever, so he handed her a shield to go with it. She held that, a little clumsily, but it was as big as she was. He thought that was just adorable, so he picked up his swords and pointed them at her. I think he tapped her sword with one of his.

Then she proceeded to OWN him. I think she got him a dozen times in the legs, and he never managed to get close to tapping her. It was HILARIOUS.

"She's turtling!"
"She can't help it!"

[pawsplay]

A class of 5 year olds with stakes will totally OWN an 9th gen vampire, no matter what he has. Particualrly if there backed up with kittens.

Yeah, one of the players on the Dallas scene finally pushed things too far, and a friend of a friend brought her hall friends from college to a game, got them all bit parts, and proceeded to swarm the guy.

[James Holloway]

So in my first Cthulhu Live game, we're playing at a friend's ranch in the hills outside San Jose, California. It really is pretty remote, and it's a nice location for a 1920s game -- an old house with no TVs, etc.

So the characters have spent their first night in this house, and have gone out for a walk in the morning only to come back and find the house's caretaker has killed himself in the shower (I lay in that shower for like an hour waiting for the dawdling bastards to come back and then what seemed like another hour waiting for one of them to decide he had to take a whiz). Blood everywhere.

So they arrange to have the body collected, and in the meantime they put it in the barn so it isn't lying in the shower.

Some time later, one of the players wanders out of the house onto the veranda, and sees a plume of smoke (from the fog machine) coming out of the barn. "Holy crap," he thinks, "the barn's on fire!" In fact, unbeknownst to him, the fog is a side effect of the zombie-raising ritual. So he walks into the barn. I'm crouched in a stall, still in my bloody makeup. When he gets closer to me, I lurch to my feet, going "Gnaaaaah."

He puts a hand on a nearby windowsill (no glass in the barn windows) and just vaults outside. He goes running back to the house screaming his head off -- OMG TEH DEAD WALK!!!1! So naturally the other players come outside to investigate.

Now, all this time I'm still shambling toward the barn door, because, you know, zombies are slow. So the other players come out of the house to see what the hell this guy is yelling about, and they actually get a pretty good distance toward the barn before I come lurching out.

I swear to god, as one, they stop where they are and stand stock still for a moment and then flush like quail, scattering back toward the house, all except one poor son of a bitch who has been a little too intrepid and now has me between him and safety. He pauses long enough for me to "gnaa" at him and then takes off running down the long road to San Jose.

Eventually he did come back.

But I thought it was nice of him to take off hell-for-leather toward civilization, no matter how far it was.

Ahhh... I need more Cthulhu Live in my diet.

[Redfeild]

MET again. Green book. Playing Clan Tremere.

So the chantry as a whole dose some thing real stupid. The Regent decides to lay the smack down. This all happens between games on line.

We are met by a Gargoyle. This was back when gargoyles were pretty much a secret even to lowly tremere like myself. So I gather after the fact that everyone had there usual bad ass answers. Everything from 'no big deal/whatever' to 'I can not believe this shit'. Now I keep it real. I'm a 13th gen nobody. I'm a non combat book keeper. So write a description of my character screaming bloody murder while being cased down a dark ally. Not real funny. you had to be there. but the guy in Houston playing the regent say Out of Character to me "Some one in a horror RPG actually being afraid of some thing? Thats refreshing."

BTW, the gargoyle was only delivering a message.

[Fugitive Unknown]

Antoher funny one, the first larp I'd actually played, at a convention. One of the groups were a bunch of Sabbat here with the goal of "kill as many people as possible"

They needed to isolate vampires to kill em, but it was often difficult to do that since "hey lets go and talk outside" was practically a threat in that game.

So they had a simple solution - they waited in the men's bathroom and killed everyone as they were talking a piss and or shit.

The fact that the ST's let em get away with is was a travesty, but there was alot of travesties in that game.