Actual Play: Buffy - The Watch House [Archive] - Page 2

Craig Oxbrow

03-15-2004, 06:26 PM

The Watch House: Who Are You?

We open down the pub. Emma and Ginny roll their eyes at a poster for tomorrow's "School Disco" which the gits are leering at. Henry and Navinder are studiously avoiding them at the pool table. Tessa and Rachel are behind the bar, glaring at Genevieve chatting to Forbes...

Michelle waves, looks like she's gonna come over. Jake looks a tad wary, then Michelle smirks and heads over to talk to some other guy...

Then another girl steps up to the table - and sets down a rucksack.

It's Liz (played by Honeysuckle Weeks (http://www.honeysuckleweeks.co.uk/amp05hws.jpg)).

Liz: Um, Andy? I need some crash space.
Andy: Ah. Guys, this is Liz. My sister.
Liz: So these are the -
Andy: Uh, yeah. Milli, Dorkface Jerk Idiot (to Ziggy), Jack, William, Jake. He's in a band.
Milli: Dorkface Jerk Idiot. I like that.
Andy: And what are you doing here, this being term time?
Milli: Yeah, don't you have school?

Jack looks away from Liz rather hurriedly.

And across town, in a small tenement house, Mac (Rory McCann (http://www.hamiltonhodell.co.uk/grx/PICS/CHRISPIC/mcCann.jpg)) turns from his array of bugging equipment and looks over at Skel (David Thewlis (http://www.geocities.com/SoHo/9633/)).

Mac: Uh, boss? The werewolf's sister just turned up.
Skel: Nah there's a thing, eh? Prolly ran away from 'ome. Tragic when a child feels they gotta do that... 'E's an 'ereditary lycanthrope, inne? Fin' out if it only passes down the male line. Or not...

Liz: We had a row, okay? I just need some away time.
Andy: What about?
Liz: Oh, y'know. Nothing much really.
Andy: C'mon, I'll get you a drink.
Milli: You sure you want her drinking around him (Ziggy) and him (Jack)?
Jack: Like a Coke or something.
Ziggy: Why am I as bad as William? (who is seated next to Jack)

Liz: Y'know. I needed some time out. We're just territorial. Uh, people are. I mean.
Milli: Is this the... family problem?
Liz: Kind of. Not all of it, but that's kinda part of every argument at home isn't it?
Andy: Yeah...
Milli: So you're...
Liz: No. Well, not yet. But I don't want to jinx things.
Milli: It'd be bad trying to organise the cycles.
William: Cycles?
Milli: The moon and...
Liz (utterly matter-of-fact): Oh, no, when one of us gets it the cycles fit together.

Milli nods. The guys look at everything and anything else.

Milli: So, a family thing? Don't worry, I have problems with my parents too.
Liz: Is that because of the... (gestures to Milli's hair and earrings) or is this because of the problems?
Milli: The what? What's wrong with the way I look?
Liz: Um, nothing? But (looks to Andy) can you imagine what mum'd say if I came home looking like that?
Andy: She'd probably say "that's nice, dear".
Liz: Well, yeah... But she'd be mad.

Jake: So, what was the fight about?
Ziggy: If it's female trouble we don't want to know.
Milli: Let the girl talk!
Ziggy: You're like an emotional grasshopper.
Andy: Bipolar.
Ziggy: See, mine was a metaphor. That was meaner. But it's not like you need the other arm, right?
Andy: Uh... anyway... obviously you're not at home so -
Ziggy: Good Lord, Sherlock! How do you do it?

Milli: So... do you have any plans while you're here? See the sights of the city maybe?
Jake: Look, there's a college. And another college. And there's a college next to it!
Ziggy: Well, there's the girls' locker room.
Milli: Shut up.
Ziggy: It's a sight of the city.
Milli: You don't wanna be reminding me of that.

Emma swings by, introductions are made.

Liz: So what is there to do in town?
Jack: Well, there's the School Disco.
Milli: We wouldn't have to dress up for it.
Jake: Yes you do.
Milli: Er... well do you have a uniform with you?
Liz (deadpan): Why yes, I packed one when planning to run away from home and not go to school for a week or so.
Milli: Um... Were we planning to go to the school disco? I mean, why would anyone want to wear a uniform?
Ziggy: How about I buy a big sticker saying IRONY?

Liz: So apart from this thing you're all avoiding, what else is there to do?
Milli: Well, I guess you could hang around with us. We don't have the most... normal lives.
Andy: You can go get bored out of your skull at the library.

William hands Liz a cola... then snatches it away.

William: Er, rum. Sorry. (hands it to Jake.)

Liz: Anyway, what about some crash space?
Milli: I don't have a roommate.
Andy: If she stays with you she could come back with tattoos or something.
Milli: It's not contagious...
Ziggy: Escher's got some spare rooms.
Liz: The artist?
Emma: The Watcher.
Liz: Oh.
Milli: Mister Escher's sound. He's like our dad.
Liz: So hardly ever there?
Andy: Not our dad. (to Milli) Wasn't he friends with your parents?
Milli: They were. That was a long time ago.

(Good heavens, this is a long pre-credits sequence. It's like Alias or something, where the credits come in after ten minutes and then there's an advertisement break.)

Craig Oxbrow

03-15-2004, 06:27 PM

Milli makes the necessary call.

Milli: Hi, Mister Escher?
Escher: Ah, good evening. Something I wanted to ask you, but go ahead.
Milli: Andy's sister just turned up and she needs somewhere to stay.
Escher: Andy's sister, ah yes... (looks for a file...) Well, if they both want to stay at mine that's fine. Just for half term?
Milli: I guess so. Now, what did you want to ask?
Escher: Ah yes. A new consignment of books has just arrived and I'd appreciate some help cataloguing it.
Milli: Oh, sure thing.

Milli: Right, I have to go into the office to help catalogue some books.

Ziggy points and laughs.

Milli: Ziggy's gonna come along too.
Ziggy: No I'm not!
Milli: No, you are. This is a big bonding thing. We're going to go. And sort books. And. Become. Better. Friends.
Ziggy: Are you trying to scare me into being your friend? Because it's working.
Jack: What, are you going to let him read these books? After what happened last time?
Milli: No, we're not letting him read them.
Liz (quietly): What happened last time?
Andy (quietly): Oh y'know, we were invisible.
Milli: He's been a complete git to everyone. Especially Mister Escher.
Ziggy: I've been on my best behaviour! It's not my fault if I lack some obscure ideas of good manners.
Milli: Respect, basic human decency...

Liz watches them go, carrying on in this vein, and raises an eyebrow as Andy picks up her rucksack and follows.

Escher: Ah, good evening Miss Sampson.
Liz: Hi. So you're a...
Escher: Yes. And you're not a...
Liz: No. Well, apparently. Yet. Touch wood. (taps Escher's desk.)
Escher: Right, well. This way, I'll let you get settled in. Milli, I'll leave you in charge.

Andy and Liz look around Escher's home briefly, Andy pausing at a black-framed photograph of a woman on the mantelpiece. He considers asking, but decides against it.

And in the office, Ziggy and Milli are going at each other as usual.

Milli: I don't understand you at all!
Ziggy: What's not to understand? I'm an open book!

And for emphasis he opens the book he was holding and slams it down on the table. Without looking at it, naturally.

Ziggy: Now you, on the other hand, are as see-through as cheerleader's shirt on Friday Night!
Milli: What? No, I'm not!
Ziggy: Sure you are. Let's see.. I'm Milli... what do I do.. oh right! Kick kick kick, pine pine pine! (makes goo goo eyes) "Ohhh, Jake's sooo special!" (mimes kicking something repeatedly while still making goo goo eyes) Kick kick kick, whine whine whine.
Milli: Oh, come on! If that's what you think you don't know me at all!

The book quietly and unobtrusively flips forward a few pages, and the writing on the newly-revealed page starts to shimmer like gold leaf...

Ziggy: And any problem that can't be kicked will get sorted out by Escher, or William... or, well, anyone who bothers to think before they act.
Milli: That's not true!
Ziggy: Oh puh-leeeze! You couldn't go a week without getting Escher or William or Emma or somebody to help you out with something!
Milli: I could too!
Ziggy: Wanna bet?

And as they argue, the golden letters start to glow, and sparks of gold swirl up into the air...

Ziggy looks over as yellowish smoke starts to billow out of the book, tendrils lit by golden light snaking towards them... He dives to slam the book shut, but by then it's already caught them. There's a bright golden glow and the smoke is gone.

Milli: Okay, what did you just do?
Ziggy: Me? You started with the shouting at the books!
Milli: You opened the book! And now you shut it we don't know what page that was!
Ziggy: Meh. We're fine, right?
Milli: You're not even worried? Some weird magicky thing zaps us and you're like Meh? I really don't get you at all. And you say you don't understand me! You think my life's so simple, you should try it!
Ziggy: Pffft... piece of pie. If you can handle being me for a while, you can handle anything.

And they stomp away, glaring at each other... and not noticing the tendrils of yellowish smoke snaking after them as they head to their rooms... and catching them as they sleep... and then sliding out of their windows and meeting up with a sudden golden flash...

Ziggy groans as an alarm wakes him. He thinks "what the bloody hell time is it" and thrashes around for his alarm clock... but it's on the wrong side of his bed... and as he opens his eyes he sees that he isn't in his room. "Wait a minute..." he thinks and draws back the covers... and sees his hand is a lot smaller and paler than it should be.

We hear Ziggy thinking "okay, okay, no panicking" as he stumbles out of bed towards the bathroom and the mirror. And maybe we recognise Milli's room in his point-of-view shot.

But we definitely recognise Milli in the mirror.

"Milli": AAAARGH!

Credits!

Craig Oxbrow

03-15-2004, 06:39 PM

"Milli": OH MY GOD! (pause) WHAT HAPPENED TO MY HAIR?

"Milli" quits gawping... then looks down and starts gawping again. Then slaps "herself" and stumbles over to the bedside table and retrieves Milli's phone.

"Milli": Okay, Milli's number... no, wait! "My" number!

Cut to Ziggy's room, and the phone ringing.

Milli V/O: Nnngh... That isn't my alarm clock... and that isn't my ceiling... What the...

A hand grabs the receiver and a voice weakly mumbles:

"Ziggy": Hello? (cough, lighter) hello? Uh...
"Milli": Milli, is that you?
"Ziggy": Wait, who is this? Who... (deeper) Who the hell is this?

Milli's POV leaps out of bed and looks around for a mirror, finds one...

"Ziggy": YEEAAAA!

Back to "Milli", looking down "her" top, shifting around in the mirror to get a better view...

"Milli": You're up then...
"Ziggy": ZIGGY?!
"Milli": So it would seem. Milli?
"Ziggy": You're goddamn right! What did you do?
"Milli": What did I do?
"Ziggy": With the magic book and the flashy light and the going "meh"!
"Milli": Oh that's nice, blame the black man!
"Ziggy": I'm the black man!

"Ziggy": We have to tell Mister Esch - or Wil - (tries to form words) we can't tell them, can we?
"Milli": Er, I guess not. Why?
"Ziggy": Because you said I couldn't go a week without getting them to help and then we got zapped and I'm you and we can't tell anybody and I have to trust you to sort this out!
"Milli": tsk...
"Ziggy": AAAAGH!

"Ziggy": Okay, nobody ever gets to wake me up and tell me to look in the mirror ever again...

As "he" nicks "his" face while shaving, then leans back to look at the small black tattoo on "his" chest.

Cut between the two of them stumbling around each other's rooms. "Milli" practices a few kicks in front of the mirror, smacks "her" foot off the bedpost and falls over. "Ziggy" looks through "his" bedside cabinet and finds a journal. "He" pauses, looks through it briefly, and then shuts it again, looking guilty. "Milli" rifling through drawers, throwing out underwear, until "she" finds a pair of black pants.

"Milli": I knew it!

Then "Ziggy" opens the journal again, reads a bit more, shuts it again looking even guiltier and puts it away...

Arriving at Escher's office after a rough night, Jake finds Milli not there, Ziggy there already, William, Andy and Liz sitting quietly, and Escher in an even more sober suit than usual, speaking with a grey-bearded man in tweeds. This is Roger Wyndham-Pryce (Special Guest Star Roy Dotrice (http://www.buffy.nu/IMG/jpg/roy1.jpg)).

As Jake makes himself a coffee, he looks around somewhat perplexed at those who are here and those who aren't... and that "Ziggy" is wearing a suit.

Jake: So who's the old guy?
Andy: These old guys in tweed. They come six to a penny.
Jake: Well, yeah, this is a History department at Cambridge. (to Liz) This is our life. It's very interesting. (to Ziggy) What's up with you?
"Ziggy": What, I can't look good?
Jake: You said it. (retrieves a spot of shaving foam from "Ziggy's" ear, shows it to "him".)
"Ziggy": More complicated than I thought.

Escher looks up expectantly as the door opens again, then furrows his brow as Emma enters.

Escher: Ah, good, come in. As we see, quite punctual. Everyone, this is Mister Wyndham-Pryce.
Wyndham-Pryce: Ah, yes. Now, let me have a look at you all. Hmm. Hmm.

Emma is suddenly conscious of her loose green sweatshirt and hipster jeans, and rather pointedly slouches so as to conceal her exposed navel... Liz, wearing a baggy plaid shirt and jeans with no left knee, hides behind Andy. Andy isn't much help of course, also wearing a plaid shirt, faded jeans, a T-shirt with a tear across the belly, and a dog collar.

Wyndham-Pryce: This would be the Lycanthropus Manticora, then?
Liz: He has a name.
Wyndham-Pryce: Of course he does, young lady. And the collar would be a stab at irony?

William is very aware that he came here from the lab.

Wyndham-Pryce: No tie, Mister Grove?
William: I was in the lab early. Don't want to drop a tie into a beaker.
"Ziggy": Working all night, weren't you?
Escher: Of course, up early researching. (smiles uncomfortably)

Mister Wyndham-Pryce looks over Ziggy's dark suit, light blue shirt, tie and polished shoes, and nods approvingly.

Wyndham-Pryce: Very smart.
"Ziggy": Thank you.

Everyone else looks at "him" suspiciously.

Wyndham-Pryce: Now, this isn't Miss Blackhurst, is it?
Emma: Ah, no.
"Ziggy": Yes, where is Milli?

Cut to "Milli" inside the bathroom.

"Milli": What the hell do you need all these creams, lotions and scents for? It's ridic- ooh... that smells nice. Ohh... that too... and that... and that...

Escher: Millicent is normally one of the most punctual, being a fully cleared Prentice rather than a... volunteer. (looks pointedly at Andy) But I did have her and Mister Roots cataloguing books last night.
Wyndham-Pryce: But Mister Roots was here on time.
"Ziggy": It was a very busy night. Maybe I should call... her and see where she is...

"Ziggy": Where are you?
"Milli": Yeah yeah, be right there. Things to do.

And "she" goes back to picking out a wardrobe and singing along to Lush's Single Girl.

"Milli": Single girl, I don't wanna be a single girl... God, she has like no wardrobe...

Then "she" pulls open a drawer and finds a crisp white blouse and neatly-pressed black skirt.

"Milli": A-ha... respectable parental visit type clothes...

"She" grins evilly...

Jack wanders into Escher's office looking semi-smart but lacking a tie. Wyndham-Pryce nods vaguely and looks at his watch.

Escher: Ah, this should be her... n... now...

And in she comes. To the strains of Britney Spears's Baby One More Time.

Milli's player: You know that Britney Spears video?

Too much eyeliner. Pinkish-red lips. Hair loose instead of tied back. White blouse barely buttoned to draw attention to her cleavage and show her navel. Black bra peeking out. School tie dangling loose. A really short black school skirt. Knee-length combat boots. And a lollipop in her mouth.

Everyone looks at her. "Ziggy's" jaw drops.

Escher and "Ziggy's" appalled and disbelieving expressions are perfectly still for a moment of stunned silence...

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

03-15-2004, 06:43 PM

Back to Escher and Ziggy, still with exactly the same expression, now starting to look nervous as well.

Then Milli finds Ziggy's voice and barely controls a shriek...

"Ziggy": What are you WEARING?!

Jake splutters on his coffee as he restarts his brain. Liz blinks once and adds this data to her "that Milli girl's crazy" file. Andy looks puzzled. William looks horrified. Jack leans back and falls out of his chair.

"Milli": What, I can't look nice now and then?
"Ziggy": Wh-why?

Jake starts humming Baby One More Time under his breath. Emma narrows her eyes slightly.

Jake: Well, you know that School Disco thing tonight?

"Milli" smiles sunnily at Jake, and leans forward a bit. He blinks and pointedly looks away. Emma glares.

Jake: Course, that thing's at nine o' clock tonight.
Jack: Don't see a problem...
"Milli": Gaaahd, you people!
"Ziggy": Yeah, you people. Obviously she's going to be working undercover.
"Milli": No...

Escher blinks several times, then thinks of something to say and rushes to get it out as quickly as possible.

Escher: Ah! Yes! Of course! (phew) Going undercover. Blending in. Showing initiative. Commendable! Good work!
"Milli": But I wasn't -
Escher: Yes! Very good. Well, ah, yes, now that you've tested the, ah, disguise out. Very successful. Yes. Perhaps put something else on -
"Ziggy": Yes, go and change!
Escher: Or at least button up for the rest of the day. Like your Philosophy lecture. In half an hour. Ah. One of the brightest students on the course. Em, yes. (nods very quickly.)

"Ziggy": You can have my coat as well.
"Milli": Why would -
"Ziggy": Have my coat as well.

"Milli" reluctantly takes Ziggy's jacket from "him".

"Milli": So what's goin' on?
Escher: Mister Wyndham-Pryce is here for a surprise inspection of the class.
"Milli": Oh... (stifles a giggle) hehehehe...
"Ziggy": Well, as you can see, we're fresh from patrolling.
Andy: Uh, yes! These tears in my shirt are from vampire claws!
Jack: Do you know how hard it is to find good clothes at 3 a.m.?
"Ziggy": Or any clothes. (glaring at "Milli".)
"Milli": Shut up or I'll kick you. Nyer. I could kick Ziggy.
"Ziggy": Why would you want to?
"Milli": You're here, I'm bored.

Escher: Errr... Now, the regular update on our activities beyond tutelage and training. I've managed to confirm the identity of Skel's accomplice Mac. Harold MacNamara, repeat offender with a string of minor offences, thefts and the like, in the antiquities trade. Accusations of tomb robbing in central Europe, but mostly theft on demand here. A number of violent assaults, and... questioned in connection with two murders in northern Germany, but released due to a lack of evidence.
Emma: Wow, he sounds nice.

Escher: Skel, of course, has no record at all. That said, descriptions matching him have been reported by witnesses to a variety of crimes in the Caribbean, the Americas, here, mainland Europe... Watch for these two and bear in mind that he has already recruited other agents, human and not. Still, at least we are protected against divination and other forms of sympathetic magic.
Wyndham-Pryce: Good, good.

Jake slaps himself to stop looking at "Milli".

Escher: Speaking of which, how are we progressing with warding our base of operations and your homes?
Emma: Oh, ah, it's coming along. It would help if I knew Skel's true name, of course. Which would be why he never uses it...
Andy: Well, my room's never been safer.
Emma: Because you're not there.
William: The smell keeps vampires away.
"Milli": Keeps everything away.
Jake: So, you mark your territory?
"Milli": Do you sniff yourself as well?
Andy: After you.

"Milli" crosses "her" arms.

"Ziggy": Will you stop staring at her?

Liz kicks Andy in the shins.

Escher: Good. Keep up the good work. Meanwhile, of course, we shall continue to patrol, and some of you at least have lectures to go to.

Mister Wyndham-Pryce heads out.

"Ziggy": I think we should get some work done with the surprise inspection and all.
"Milli": We've already had the inspection. It's not much of a surprise now.
Jake: Seems some of us had prior warning anyway.
Andy: Yeah, how did you know?
Jake: Oh yeah, you're psychic!
Liz: He is?
Jake: No, I am actually...
"Ziggy": I didn't know. This is all I could find clean in my wardrobe.
Jake: Oh, yeah, sure.
"Ziggy": Have you seen my room? Anyway, you look worse than usual...
Jake: I didn't sleep well.
"Milli": Oh yeah, didn't sleep well... (pointedly looks at "Ziggy")
Jake: By myself.
"Milli": Anyway, none of the rest of us knew.
Escher: Clearly.
"Ziggy": You should see my closet, it's all dirty!
"Milli": I think it's just another example of Ziggy knowing stuff we don't.
"Ziggy": I just thought it'd be fun to -
"Milli": To shave?
Jake: You got fresh polish on your shoes.
"Ziggy": I... couldn't sleep.
Jake: I couldn't sleep and I look like this.
"Milli": You look fine the way you do.

"Ziggy": ... So, Mister Escher, anything else? Or just a regular day working and training?
Escher: I believe he wants to see you in your...
"Milli": Natural habitat?

Escher blinks as "Milli" interrupts him.

Jack: So we show off our natural assets.

Jack fails to hide a suggestive grin. "Ziggy" punches him on the arm. "Milli" slaps him. Escher looks like he wants to deck him as well.

Jake (looking away quickly): Milli, I don't think you wanna do that... unbuttoned.
Escher: Well, perhaps it's time to...
"Ziggy": Change?
"Milli": What, why?
"Ziggy": It's inappropriate.
"Milli": No it's not.
Jake: So's that.
"Ziggy": You want to see my room?

The group get ready to go. Jake lights a cigarette as soon as he stands. "Ziggy" goes over to Escher, tries to say something, and blurts out something else:

"Ziggy": Sorry. She was very upset.

Milli leads the way... to the pub.

Jake: I've got a lecture this morning y'know.
"Milli": C'mon, you big pussy!

Jake blinks and lights another cigarette, trying to keep his hands from shaking.

Emma collars "Milli".

Emma: What are you doing?
"Milli": Nothing... look, I'll tell you later.
Emma: Oh, it's like a thing?
"Milli": Yeah.
Emma: Okay then...

Jake: So we're going to this School Disco thing after all then?
"Milli": Yeah.
Jake: So we'll have to dress up too.
"Milli": Yeah.
Jake: Because we can't leave you out there alone looking -
Emma: Like that.
"Milli": A girl can't wear a skirt?
Jack: Well, you barely are.
"Milli": It's perfectly respectable. Covers my ass.

Jake lights up again, keeping the smoke between himself and "Milli"...

Jack: At least we know she's not gonna kick anybody.

"Ziggy" continues to fume quietly.

Emma: Tell you what, we'll go if you (to Jake) wear shorts.
Jake: Uh... oh... kay...?
Jack: So, Emma, you'll be wearing...
Emma: About twice as much as Milli is.
Jack: So still not much then.

Andy: When I went to school we had the option of wearing trousers or shorts. So I wore trousers and I just got them ripped to shreds, so I just started wearing shorts...

Everyone looks at Andy momentarily, and then they carry on talking.

"Milli": So guys, you gonna go and get changed?
Emma: Sometime in the next eleven and a half hours.
"Milli": I get that it's a long time...
"Ziggy": Do you?

They glare at each other momentarily.

"Ziggy": Uh, so, is anyone else worried about this inspection? They might go and look in our rooms.
Jack: It's private property.
Jake: It's college property...
Andy: Right. Just off to change the name tag on my room with next door's.
"Milli": That's outrageous. It's like a, er, totalitarian demon state. How can they do that?
"Ziggy": You've had half an hour to change now.
Jake: Yeah, it's terrible. I mean, look at the way they looked down at your outfit.

Priding himself on remembering to say "at", Jake heads to the bar. "Milli" up and follows.

"Milli": So, anyway. Were you staring?
Jake: No... uh... what are you drinking?
"Milli": So, you and Emma, how's that going?
Jake: Uh... pretty good?
"Milli": Cool.
Jake: Why d'you ask?
"Milli": Friends can't ask?
Jake: Have you been talking to Emma?
"Milli": No, just wondering...

And "she" smiles sunnily and leans over "to get her drink". Jake quickly looks at the price of crisps.

Jack: So, do you think Michelle will come to the disco?
"Milli": Well I dunno. Last time I saw her you were with her.
Jack: I don't understand women's minds.
"Ziggy": No kiddin'.
Jack: What about you, William?
William: Wh-what about me?
Jack: You coming?
Andy: William only just got out of school uniform.
"Ziggy": Come on, don't pick on William, he didn't do anything.
"Milli": Yeah. (takes a drink)
"Ziggy": Uh, are we being watched right now? Maybe we shouldn't drink.
"Milli": Shut up and have a drink. Kick you.
"Ziggy": Let's be -
Andy: I think we should demonstrate our class and manners. And drink single malts!
"Milli": Yes! Demonstrate our ability to hold our drink!
Emma: Which in Andy's case isn't up to much.

"Milli": So... shorts?
Jake: If everyone else is... anyone else is?
"Milli": No...
Jake: Anybody?
William: Well, we weren't planning on doing anything tonight.
"Milli": C'mon! Get Charlotte out in a school uniform! You'd like that!
Jake: Maybe pigtails if you ask her nice!
"Milli": Pigtails! Yeah! I shoulda done pigtails!
Andy: I can do that for ya.
Liz: He's a good big brother. (grins)
Andy: Hold still...
"Ziggy": I thought you were gonna change...

And so Andy starts plaiting "Milli's" hair...

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

03-15-2004, 06:46 PM

Liz: Okay, Milli's into it, but the whole school uniform thing was obviously thought up by a man. I mean, guys can turn up in stripy ties and maybe blazers if they can be bothered, and girls have to look like, well, like that. (points at "Milli")
"Milli": Hey, it's fun...
"Ziggy": ...
Liz: And anyway, this is Cambridge. Most of the crowd will have gone to boarding school anyway... so they would have been wearing school uniforms normally like six months ago...

"Ziggy" clumps off to the bar as Jake goes to get a round in. "He" steadies "his" breathing, bites "his" lip and steps up to talk to him...

"Ziggy": So, er, Jake, I've been thinking of getting a girlfriend recently.
Jake: Oh yeah? Anyone in mind?

"Ziggy" looks awkwardly from side to side...

Jake: *laughs* Again with the impossible women! Nah, dude, she'd kick your ass for even thinking about it.
"Ziggy": What?
Jake: Erm...nothing. You serious?
"Ziggy": So I just thought I'd, y'know, chat to you about it. Man to man. See what you think and all. How would you feel about it?
Jake: Why you asking me? What you trying to suggest?
"Ziggy": I dunno...it wouldn't bother you or anything?

Jake raises an eyebrow in a way that gives nothing at all away about what he's thinking.

Jake: I'm with Emma!
"Ziggy": Right. (pause) So, it'd be fine by you then.
Jake: I guess! Cos like, I have a girlfriend. So why would it matter to me?

Jake looks at "Ziggy" suspiciously.

Jake: It's your funeral!
"Ziggy": Cool.

And "Ziggy" steps away, swallowing hard once "his" back is turned...

As Jake heads back, Matthew steps up to the group table.

Matthew: Hi Will, Jake, Andy... random girl sitting with Andy... Have any of you seen Michelle since this morning? We were supposed to look over the tapes from the, uh, y'know. House. And haven't seen her.
Jack: Woulda been nice to, but no.
"Milli": You killed her and buried her body somewhere...
Jack: Er, no?
Jake: Well, we saw her talking to some guy.
"Milli": That girl fair gets around, doesn't she? (smirks at Jack)
Jake: Well, maybe you should go ask her roommate?
Matthew: Right, yeah.

Liz: Who's Michelle?
Jake: She's the non-virgin.
Jack: So she's not a virgin?
Emma: This is how Jack shows interest in girls. It's slightly more advanced than pulling their pigtails.
"Milli": Try to pull my pigtails and I will kick you.

"Ziggy": Well, we should check her lectures. Jake?
Jake: I never got to any because I got dragged to the pub, remember?
"Ziggy": Then we should go and check.
Jake: I think that suit's making you sensible.
"Ziggy": Ask her flatmate then.
Jake: So, go knock her up. Er, I mean...
"Ziggy": We shouldn't spend too long in the pub because we might be being watched.
"Milli": Oh, shut up. Let's stay inna pub.
Andy: I have an idea! Let's be seen, get fired from our job fighting evil and stay in the pub!
"Milli": I think that's a great idea.

William arches an eyebrow ever so slightly...

Jake gets up to get a new pack of cigarettes...

"Ziggy": So, gonna check on Kerry. How about you come along then?
Jake: Matthew's doing that.
"Ziggy": I think Matthew left because we annoyed him...

"Milli" shouts over for another round.

"Ziggy": Don't you think you've had enough?
Jake: You won't make it to tonight.
"Milli": Last time I was in a warm sleeping bag.
Andy: Yes, it was warm.
Jack: How'd you get into her sleeping bag?
"Ziggy": What? Could you just shut up?

"Ziggy" glares threateningly at Jack. He blanks the reaction.

Matthew returns.

Matthew: Kerry hasn't seen her since this morning. She said she had breakfast with some guy.
Jake: Maybe try her mobile?
Matthew: It was off earlier...

As he heads off to make the call:

"Ziggy": Right, now could we go check?
"Milli": Oh my God. She's not at home and she hasn't come to see the boring guys and do the boring thing! She must be in danger!

They share a look again...

William: Are you okay Milli? You're acting a bit... strangely.
Jack: Dressing a bit strangely...
"Ziggy": A bit?
Jack: So are you. And you haven't used race to defend yourself all day.
"Ziggy": Do you want me to hit you?
"Milli": I could kick him for you.

Jake: So the plan is I go to class and you stay in the pub?
"Ziggy": No, we go to class. Then check with her roommate.
Jake: Well, I'm going to class.
"Milli": I'll go with you.
"Ziggy": Oh no, how about you go change?
"Milli": Me? Look at you, some kinda stuffed-up pumpkin...
"Ziggy": There wasn't anything else clean!
Jake: You can keep saying it but it doesn't get any more convincing.
"Ziggy": You have no idea what it's like to wake up to this... horrible... smell.
"Milli": You're a guy. Andy, your room smells, right?
Andy: Um...
"Milli": I wouldn't worry about it.
"Ziggy": I'm realising how pathetic it is, trying to improve...

Jake shakes his head, lights yet another smoke, and goes to check if Michelle came to class. She didn't, so he confirms that.

"Ziggy": Right! Then let's go and check her room!
"Milli": Fine, sheesh...

Heading over to Michelle's stair, Jake steps aside.

Jake: Ladies first.
"Milli": Why, thank you...

"She" smiles sweetly and starts to climb the stairs, with Jake behind "her", perfectly positioned for an... interesting view.

"Ziggy": Hey... uh, how about you go and cover our backs?

Andy shakes his head.

Andy: Okay, I'm going to give Liz a tour. Call me if you need anything.

"Milli" starts heading upstairs again, when "she" hears a thud. Henry was riding by, got distracted by... something... and rode his bike onto the kerb and fell off.

"She" bends down to help him up. Jake fails not to look. "Ziggy" slaps Jake on top of his head.

Henry: You look... you look... uh...
"Milli": It's for the School Disco tonight.
Henry: Right, just... nobody else is... uh... ready.
Jack: Are you coming?
Henry: I'm... not sure? What does Milli think?
"Ziggy": Milli thinks you've had a nasty fall. Right, Milli?
"Milli": Oh, uh, yeah...

After they see a very rattled Henry off, Michelle's roommate Kerry confirms:

Kerry: Yeah, she went off really early with this really huge Scottish guy.
Jake: Like six-six, really short hair?
Kerry: Yeah, that's 'im. Something 'bout a haunted house. They were gonna have breakfast at The King's Arms...
"Milli": Thanks. So, are you going to the School Disco tonight?
Kerry: (looks at "Milli") I don't think I could compete.

Once away, "Milli" concedes:

"Milli": Right, that's not good.
Emma: The King's Arms is outside the Shield.
"Milli": I say we stock up on weapons and -
Jake: Go to the pub.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

03-15-2004, 06:48 PM

The King's Arms is a fairly new establishment, in an area of town that extends outside the late medieval boundaries protected by the Shield.

"Milli": Maybe we should get a quick drink to try and look inconspicuous.
Emma: Yeah, inconspicuous.
Jake: You're looking cold.
"Milli": What?

"Ziggy" subtly points at "Milli's" chest. "She" folds "her" arms. "He" gives "her" the jacket again.

"Ziggy": Her eyes are up there, you know!
"Milli": Yeah!

Jake heads over to ask if the barman saw Michelle. Emma goes with.

Emma: What the hell's going on with those two?
Jake: I think he's being defensive because he fancies her.
Emma: No way... oh God...

The barman confirms they were over there. Jake checks and finds Michelle's pencil, which gives him a flashback to her dropping it after Mac uses it to write down the address...

Mac: Seventeen Standard. Just a bunch of knockin' noises, probably pipes, but the boss reckons it being haunted might actually put the price up.
Michelle: Sure, we can check that out for ya.
Mac: It's just a couple minutes walk if you want to take a look?
Michelle: A'right then...

Jake: Right, I know where they went.
Jack: Did you get that too, Ziggy?
"Ziggy": Huh?
"Milli": You're psychic! Wooooo!
William: Just finish your drink, Milli...

"Ziggy": I was wondering, the visions... does that hurt?
Jake: Sometimes. It depends what I see.
"Milli": Your deep and sensitive nature. Oooh, the pain.
"Ziggy": That's gotta be tough...

"Milli": Anyway, let's go to the address and kick some ass. Yeah.
Jack: It's really Michelle we're looking for.
Jake: Really, Sherlock? Wow! I knew we kept you around for something! That and your witty repartee!
"Milli": We're in trouble, our only hope for wit is Jack...

Jake calls Andy in.

Andy: Go to Mister Escher's office and tell him -
Liz: You're off to play hero.

Jake: Zig, we'll scout ahead, you meet up with Andy. Milli, you follow us in. Milli?
"Ziggy": Well, are you coming or not?
"Milli": Gimme a minute, okay?
"Ziggy": Just checking...

Jack: Why don't you get changed into something more... professional?

"Milli" ignores him as "she" completes the schoolgirl outfit with a satchel containing a pistol crossbow, daggers and a jar of holy water.

Jake and "Ziggy" reach the address. Sure enough, there's a For Sale sign outside and it does look deserted enough to pass for haunted.

Jake sneaks around the back and breaks out his lockpicks. "Ziggy" hammers on the door, stake in hand and holy water in pocket... and is greeted by a sudden blast of bluish-white light and then everything goes black.

(Jake's player: Oh yeah, why don't we get the guy they want to go up and knock on the door alone?)

Skel smirks as he looms over a handcuffed, woozy, black-eyed "Ziggy".

Skel: Afternoon.
"Ziggy": Skel.
Skel: I'm flattered ya remember.

Glancing around, "Ziggy" sees a large, dingy basement, and the radiator "he's" chained to. "He" spins for a well-placed kick to the groin, but the air ripples and deflects it an inch away from contact.

Skel: You bin 'angin' round with that lil' punk girl too much, mate. So how've ya bin?
"Ziggy": Some idiot handcuffed me to a radiator, otherwise not bad.
Skel: You don't seem scared.
"Ziggy": Should I be?
Skel: I would be if I were you... what's so funny?
"Ziggy": Private joke.

And Skel cracks his knuckles, flexes his fingers... and lightning arcs between them.

"Ziggy": So who are you working for?
Skel: Oh, yer hopin' I ain't still workin' for the ol' man, eh? Sorry ta disappoint ya. Although it'd actually be worse for ya if I wasn't. 'E wants you alive.

The others arrive, and find no sign of anyone. "Milli" goes to check around the back, finds it open, takes out the crossbow and tries to load it as "she" steps inside.

Jake looks around upstairs, finds nothing and sneaks back down.

Jack tries to open the front door, with little success.

William: Oh well, it's only a credit card.
Jack: I have three more...

Jake taps on "Milli's" shoulder. "She" jumps, spins around. He points to William looking in the window. "She" mimes "big guy" and looks questioningly. He shakes his head.

William: So Jack, where is everyone else?

Jake advances towards the door under the stairs, and hears...

"Ziggy": Go on and torture me, then.
Skel: Now that's a thought, eh? An' don't think I ain't tempted, neither... Nah, I'm just here to deliver a message from back home. Apparently you had a bit of a fallin' out with the boss, dincha? I think dat's terrible, when the youth of today don't respect their elders...
"Ziggy": What?
Skel: I mean, really, lookit the way you talk to me. I been killin' people since before you could talk. But anyway, I'm just gonna put you in stasis for the trip home. Been fun talkin'.

And then Jake barges through the door at the top of the basement stairs.

Skel: Oh look. It's yer little playmates.

"Milli" misfires with the crossbow, and throws it at Skel's head with a shriek of fury. It deflects off the magical forcefield around him, but he still ducks.

"Ziggy": Guys?
Jake: It's alright, the cavalry will be here any minute!

Cut to Emma pacing as Jack fails to pick the lock...

Skel tuts as his eyes turn jet black, then he flings a bolt of lightning at the doorway with a dismissive gesture.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

03-15-2004, 06:51 PM

Jake dives back, "Milli" charges forwards.

Jack gives up and barges the door, bouncing off.

Emma: Honestly, out the way!

And with a touch and a whisper of magic, she opens the door with her thoughts.

"Milli": You gotta save him!
Jake: You do it! I'll distract him!

Skel smirks as he sees what "Milli's" wearing.

Skel: What do you look like?
"Milli": AAAAGH!

And "she" charges, daggers flailing. They bounce off the forcefield, but Skel still steps back. Close enough for "Ziggy" to kick him, a perfect shot to the backside again being deflected.

"Milli" douses the daggers in holy water, murmuring something under "her" breath. "She" swings again, and the field crackles. Skel makes a panicky gesture and the daggers fly out of "her" hands. "She" grimaces, and punches him. And again. And again.

Jake uses the distraction to undo "Ziggy's" handcuffs, then as Skel staggers back he tries to sweep his feet out with a handy broom, which cracks against the forcefield "Milli" seems to be ignoring.

The others race in and look down from the singed doorway as Skel raises a hand, as if in surrender - and the forcefield explodes outwards, throwing everyone off their feet.

"Ziggy" tries to catch "Milli" and they land in a heap.

"Ziggy:" You... you saved me.
"Milli": And... I got it.

"Milli" murmurs softly, and none of the others notice another flash of light.

Milli and Ziggy open their eyes, and see each other instead of themselves.

They start to smile, then Ziggy clutches the bruise on his head.

Ziggy: Oh damn, that hurts...

Milli springs to her feet and charges Skel. He raises a hand and she stops in mid-step, sliding back.

Skel looks the group over with a dismissive sneer as they pick themselves up, while he floats a foot off the ground, lightning arcing around his fists, eyes jet black...

Skel: Looks like our kid's made some friends. In't that nice. Course, you remember your friends from back 'ome, doncha Ziggy? Watch yer back if I was you...

And with that, he raises his hands and vanishes in a vortex of black and purple light.

Ziggy: Well, that was... inconclusive.
Jake: Any more friends from back home?

Milli rounds on Ziggy.

Milli: I'm going to kill you! I'm going to absolutely kill you!
Jake: It's not his fault!
Milli: A whole world of anger that you don't even understand!
Ziggy: Can I get my coat back?
Milli: Yes you can get your bloody coat back!

And she throws it at his head and buttons up her blouse in record time.

Jack rolls over as his phone goes off.

Michelle: Hi, I heard you were lookin' for me?
Jack: We were looking, Matthew was looking...
Michelle: Sorry about that. I was off lookin' at this supposedly scary house. Nothing scary there.
Jack: Uh, yeah...

Ziggy puts his jacket on, dusts himself off and takes off his tie.

Ziggy: What's wrong with my clothes anyway?
Milli: Have you ever heard of laundry?
Jake: What's going on, guys?
Ziggy: She doesn't have any fashion sense!
Milli: I have fashion sense! I have enough sense to wear normal clothes!

Milli stomps off upstairs. Emma catches up with her.

Emma: So what happened?
Milli: Bloody Ziggy being bloody Ziggy...

Everyone catches up.

Jake: About time to get ready for the disco, yeah? I'm in the mood now.
Milli: Going home to get changed. Not goin'.
Jake: But it was your idea to go...
Milli: No it wasn't.
Jake: Okay, what's going on?
Emma: Did you... make each other... wear...

Everyone looks rather confused. Ziggy smirks. Milli glares at him.

Ziggy: There's a funny story...
Milli: There's no funny story.
Ziggy: I tell you, the second most boring thing next to being Milli must be listening to her constant nagging.
Milli: Constant nagging? What are you talking about?
Ziggy: See, there you go. Kick kick...
Milli: Well you can probably kick better than me in this skirt. Just remove a talent from me!
Jake: I don't see any missing talent... er...

Milli turns her glare at Jake. So does Emma.

Milli: I don't want the story told. Just wanna get back, get out of this outfit. Tell them if you want.

She stomps off, turning a face close to tears away from the others.

Milli: Talking and not shutting up ever...

She turns, eyes widening in horror, and looks at Ziggy.

Milli: Oh my God, with talking, oh you didn't...
Ziggy: Oh, that? Yeah, I did.
Milli: I hate you more than you can possibly comprehend...

And with that she storms off again.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

03-15-2004, 06:53 PM

Milli goes back to her room to change, and informs Escher that they've returned.

Milli: We solved the problem...
Escher: I see. Come by my office when you're ready.

Escher: So... what happened?
Milli: Well, we traced Skel to some kinda hideout, and fought him off before he could put... Ziggy in stasis to take him back to Jamaica.
Escher: Milli...

He gives her his "I know something happened, you can tell me" look.

Escher: What happened with you and Ziggy?
Milli: Um... What?
Escher: I've seen student bets before. And I've seen possession and magical obligations affecting people's personalities. Mister Wyndham-Pryce insisted I accompany him to observe you at the pub and, well, I didn't catch all of it but I saw enough to conclude that something must have been affecting you both. I imagine his report will be less than entirely positive, but that's not important. What matters is that you're alright. Please, sit.
Milli: Um...
Escher: I could believe that was him, he's purposely erratic enough... but I know that wasn't you.

She sits, shoulders slumping, looking at her boots.

Milli: So, um... it was a bet.
Escher: And magic was involved.
Milli: ...
Escher: I'm sure it wasn't intentional.

She looks up, biting her lip before answering.

Milli: No, no it wasn't.
Escher: A geis, compelling you not to talk?
Milli: Uh... yeah.
Escher: Is it still in effect?
Milli: N-no.
Escher: But... you still don't want to talk about it.
Milli: No.
Escher: It's hardly your fault. You were... compelled?
Milli: Um...
Escher: Possessed, then.
Milli: Yeah.
Escher: By...?
Milli: Um... by each other.
Escher: ... Oh. I see. I haven't seen that one before. I've heard about it, of course. And, ah, well done on correcting it... very well done.
Milli: We, uh, said we didn't understand each other. And I guess we still don't.
Escher: Quite. I presume from your reticence that you didn't tell the others.
Milli: No.

She looks down again, swallowing hard.

Escher: You want to keep this secret?
Milli: Yeah...
Escher: From anyone in particular?
Milli: Yeah...
Escher: Jake.

Milli nods slightly, sniffles and shivers.

Escher: It's alright. I won't tell a soul.

And she nods again, and starts to tear up. Seeing this, he puts his arms around her. And as she dissolves into tears he holds her as long as she needs, looking concerned...

Escher: I'll never tell him.

And as he mentions Jake, his eyes narrow angrily, before turning tender again as he looks back to Milli...

And Wyndham-Pryce approaches the door and looks in, sees this and steps back, his eyes narrowing with distaste. He waits until Milli leaves before entering.

Wyndham-Pryce: Well. This was quite the, ah... quite the visit. Having one of your charges abducted and nearly killed, another crying in your arms... She's another in the long list of examples demonstrating the superiority of the Academy system. You don't see students from there breaking down or running away or going rogue... Anyway, I shall report my findings in due course. Perhaps see about having a teaching assistant assigned. In the meantime, I would strongly recommend that you keep some things secure. Safer than they have been...

Escher nods slightly, looking at the floor as Wyndham-Pryce goes. As the door closes, his look darkens into a scowl.

At the pub that night, Jake finds that he alone is wearing shorts. And that Milli has changed back to her usual combats and T-shirt.

Jake: Commando Night's tomorrow night.

She grimaces at them and carries on. Jake sighs and shrugs at Emma.

Ziggy: She must really hate me. Not even calling me Dorkface.

Ziggy goes to catch up to Milli as she heads away.

Milli: Piss off, Ziggy.
Ziggy: Is it the skirt? I mean, nobody's gonna remember that in three days. Except Jake. And maybe Jack. And Henry. And Escher...
Milli: Yes, that's just it.
Ziggy: Made a change from the bags you wear.
Milli: I don't wear bags. I wear comfortable clothes I can kick people in. Want a demonstration?
Ziggy: No, thanks.

Milli glares as Ziggy attempts a reassuring smile.

Milli: You're such an absolute git. Not only did you put me in a skirt - a SCHOOL SKIRT!! - but I bet you've gone and said something really bloody stupid to Jake, too, haven't you!
Ziggy: I'd just like to point out that A - not only did Jake actually notice you for once when you were in the skirt, he actually liked you in the skirt. The way I see it you should be thanking me!

Milli frowns but says nothing.

Ziggy: And B - remember that "friends trust each other" thing you went on about the other day for like.. hours?! I am your friend. I'm trying to help you here. And believe it or not, I can actually keep my mouth in check if I want to. I promise you I did not say anything stupid.
Milli: ...Um...so...what did you say to him?
Ziggy: I'm not sure I should tell you now, cos you're being so mean to me.
Milli: Ziggeeeeee, pleeeease! Tell me! Or I'll wail.
Ziggy: You're already wailing. I don't quite see the threat there.
Milli: ZIGGY!
Ziggy: Okay, okay. So, I basically tried to find out how serious he was about Emma.
Milli: Oh God. What did he say?
Ziggy: (shrugs) He was kinda...I dunno. I think he's kinda messing you around, and I was trying to, y'know, push him into actually saying something to you about it.

Ziggy looks deep into Milli's eyes, trying to look helpful. She looks away.

Milli: "Messing me around"? Explain.
Ziggy: Well, Mister Super Observant can hear a squirrel farting three miles against the wind? He can probably make out a rabbit in the snow, but he doesn't notice you following him around like a drooling puppy-dog? Not bloody likely.
Milli: Hmmm. (frowns) I never really thought about that...
Ziggy: He needs to talk to you about this. Really. It's gone on too long. And it's making you miserable.

Milli looks frowningly at her shoes. Ziggy closes his eyes for a moment, breathes in and then switches back to happy-go-lucky Ziggy, putting on the smile.

Ziggy: Yeah. So. Lighten up. We'll work this out somehow.

Milli looks up at him, dejectedly.

Milli: Will we?
Ziggy: Yeah sure.. it's not like I have a life of my own to sort out or anything. *smirks*

He gives her an awkward hug. She manages a weak smile. But it slips and her eyes start to moisten with tears...

CREDITS!
Written by Oxbrow, Cat and Dizzy, with additional post-game dialogue by Derek, from an idea by Cat and Dizzy. Checking by absolutely everyone of course.
GRR! ARG!

Craig Oxbrow

03-15-2004, 06:55 PM

Next time on The Watch House:

A man in a hooded black robe stands on a raised dais at one end of a large ballroom decorated in medieval woods.

Milli glaring as Liz tags along behind her, smiling brightly.

The robed man raises his hand.

Emma scowling.

The camera shifts behind the robed man, and we can see maybe thirty figures in hooded red robes.

Jack kicking at a door, screaming angrily.

The Watch crouched in the balcony above the ballroom, looking down.

William: Uh-oh.
Emma: That's all you can say? Uh-oh?

Escher V/O: The next episode of The Watch House is Open The Gate.

--

Actual Play bit

Who Are You? is the result of behind-the-scenes collaboration with Cat and Joe (Milli and Ziggy's players) who came up with the central plot idea, and we bounced ideas off each other for a week and a half before the session. And it was still at best a qualified success.

I feel pretty bad about how Who Are You? went "live", because it did some of its job as an actual game session but it works far better as a story. I think it was okay, but there wasn't enough for the rest of the players to do. I was concerned that there wouldn't be, but I wasn't able to fix it so that there was. My bad.

Here's how it worked.

Cat and Joe came up with the idea during one of our regular story meetings at the pub, and we quickly determined that it wouldn't work nearly as well if the other players knew what was going on out-of-character.

So that meant that when "Milli" and "Ziggy" are on-screen, Cat and Joe were in fact playing each other's characters in their own characters' bodies.

Rules-wise, I figured Attributes go with the body and Skills with the soul. (So "Ziggy" has Ziggy's average Dexterity but Milli's high Acrobatics.) Qualities and Drawbacks are case-by-case. Since the difference between "high-average" and "spectacular" is about two points, we hid this with modifiers. The only bit we really bungled was Ziggy's Sorcery, which we hadn't discussed beforehand so "Milli" was able to countermand Skel's forcefield spell once I worked out what Cat was doing with the attacks. She didn't specify "Milli" murmuring under "her" breath in-game.

"Milli" also went Righteous Fury during the fight with Skel, which cost Milli two Drama Points, which I gave back due to all the work Cat and Joe did - and to prevent my head hurting from trying to resolve the thought that the Drama Points should really go off Ziggy's sheet, but going Righteous Fury was Cat's idea, but...

Everybody worked out there was something freaky going on, but we covered it well enough that nobody guessed. The clues were definitely there.

The School Disco was, of course, there just as an excuse for "Milli's" outfit. The inspection was partially an excuse to get descriptions of everyone (so that we wouldn't have Joe pointing out that "Ziggy" was wearing a suit and tie for no apparent reason) but I knew it would go rather badly... and I snuck in some other bits of foreshadowing here and there as well. I handed out blank notes to get the descriptions before revealing the inspection was going on, which was also to make sure that if we had to pass notes there had already been some note-passing earlier in the session.

And for the record, I suggested putting "Milli" in a skirt but the schoolgirl outfit was Cat's idea. :D

Next time, something nice and simple, with plenty of goons to beat up on.

--

DVD commentary:

(As Skel mentions putting Ziggy in stasis)
Derek: We're gonna freeze you in a block of carbon for the next three years!
David: And then keep you on our wall!
Joe: Can you guess what he'll be doing if he's frozen?
Craig: Putting his finger up.
David: So we can use him as a coat hook!

(As "Milli" finds the black pants)
Joe: You know that bit in Ten Things I Hate About You where they find the big sister's black knickers? "You only own these if you want somebody to see them!"
Cat: And not only did you have Ziggy find them, you put them on!
Joe: Of course! Who wouldn't in that situation?
Craig: Well I wouldn't... admit to it in public, but yeah...
(laughter)

(As "Milli" walks into Watch House HQ)
Craig: Poor Milli. We did so many horrible things to her and she doesn't deserve any of them.
Cat: Poor thing.
Craig: I'll remind you that they were almost all your ideas. I suggested putting Milli in a skirt, the school uniform was totally your idea.
Cat: Well, we just had to go as bad as we could.
Craig: But yeah, Sophia's such a trouper. I wouldn't have blamed her if she told us to piss off. And she does distraught so well I just wanted to give her a hug at the end.
Cat: Yeah, because you fancy her!
Craig: Damn right! Did you see what she was wearing? (laughs) Ow! I was joking!

sasori

03-16-2004, 05:01 AM

Originally posted by Craig Oxbrow
Escher: I'll never tell him.

And as he mentions Jake, his eyes narrow angrily, before turning tender again as he looks back to Milli...

Why is Escher angry at Jake??

Milli: "Messing me around"? Explain.
Ziggy: Well, Mister Super Observant can hear a squirrel farting three miles against the wind? He can probably make out a rabbit in the snow, but he doesn't notice you following him around like a drooling puppy-dog? Not bloody likely.
Milli: Hmmm. (frowns) I never really thought about that...
Ziggy: He needs to talk to you about this. Really. It's gone on too long. And it's making you miserable.

So all of a sudden Jake's the bad guy!?

:'(

*sniff*

:P

Craig Oxbrow

03-16-2004, 05:17 AM

Originally posted by sasori
Why is Escher angry at Jake??
Making Milli cry will do that.

So all of a sudden Jake's the bad guy!?

:'(

*sniff*

:P
Angst, old chap, angst!

morgue

03-16-2004, 06:04 AM

Damn good ep to read, shame if the play didn't quite gel. The whole emotional arc lately has been about Ziggy and Milli, and it's pretty much resolved in this ep. I'm curious to see what comes next.

~`morgue (who quizzes out as Milli, probably unsurprisingly)

colbabe

03-16-2004, 06:03 PM

Argh, confusement about plot elements that have nothing to do with the Freaky Friday action (which was pretty super). I should probably tune in on the no-players-allowed thread to sort my head out on this issue. Otherwise, good work boyo.

Coffee_Lifeform

03-17-2004, 12:43 PM

Originally posted by sasori
Why is Escher angry at Jake??
So all of a sudden Jake's the bad guy!?

:P

I think it is kinda weird that a lecturer should really so badly to what is, essentially, your common-or-garden teenage crush. But hey, that's NPCs for you.

However, it's not so much that Jake's a bad guy per se, more that it's important there's a contrast between how Jake reacts to and treats Milli, and how Ziggy reacts to and treats her, and as mr_orgue quite astutely pointed out, there has been a big emotional plot arc with Milli and Ziggy, so it's kinda important that it's rationalised in actual play.

Craig Oxbrow

03-17-2004, 12:53 PM

Those NPCs. Can't trust 'em. They're always up to summat, talkin' behind yer backs...

And they're everywhere!

Friends, families - NPCs!

There's even one in the group!

And when one of the players doesn't show up...

NPCs! NPCs EVERYWHERE! AAAAGH!

:D

Er... anyway, he reacted badly (but not so badly that he can't work with Jake, things will just be a tad frosty) because he's developed a fatherly attachment to Milli. Seeing her hurt gets to him.

The Architect

03-18-2004, 06:09 PM

This has been damn entertaining. Took me 3 days to read it all, but I've enjoyed it.

Excellent work everyone.

sasori

03-19-2004, 04:08 AM

Originally posted by Craig Oxbrow
Er... anyway, he reacted badly (but not so badly that he can't work with Jake, things will just be a tad frosty) because he's developed a fatherly attachment to Milli. Seeing her hurt gets to him.

Ostracised from the group for being a studmuffin! Pah! Jake's too cool for you guys anyhow!

;P

sasori

03-19-2004, 04:10 AM

Originally posted by Coffee_Lifeform
as mr_orgue quite astutely pointed out, there has been a big emotional plot arc with Milli and Ziggy, so it's kinda important that it's rationalised in actual play.

Don't get me wrong, I thought it was way cool, but be wary of that Ziggy guy, he's the snake that whispers sweet poison in the ears of young ladies...

:eek:

Craig Oxbrow

03-19-2004, 04:38 AM

Originally posted by sasori
Ostracised from the group for being a studmuffin! Pah! Jake's too cool for you guys anyhow!
Isn't that Jack's line? :D

Craig Oxbrow

03-19-2004, 04:41 AM

Originally posted by The Architect
This has been damn entertaining. Took me 3 days to read it all, but I've enjoyed it.

Excellent work everyone.
*leads the bow* Thank you. :)

sasori

03-22-2004, 06:39 AM

Originally posted by Craig Oxbrow
Isn't that Jack's line? :D

Pah! Watch it...
:p

NPC rbingham2000

03-22-2004, 11:41 AM

I am loving this story hour so far.

Lots of melodrama, lots of laugh-your-ass-off moments, and lots of serious ass-kicking!

The thing that really drew me in was the relationships between the members of the crew (Milli being smitten with Jake, but trying to hide it under a facade of toughness, and Milli hating Ziggy for being a pervert and hiding his sorcerous abilities and list of enemies from the rest of the team, to name several recent examples).

Joe Dizzy

03-22-2004, 12:21 PM

Originally posted by NPC rbingham2000
Ziggy for being a pervert

*blink*

That's news to me.

Joe

Zeiram

03-22-2004, 01:40 PM

Joe, I think that was referring to the Locker Room festivities.

Craig Oxbrow

03-22-2004, 04:13 PM

Originally posted by NPC rbingham2000
I am loving this story hour so far.

Lots of melodrama, lots of laugh-your-ass-off moments, and lots of serious ass-kicking!

The thing that really drew me in was the relationships between the members of the crew (Milli being smitten with Jake, but trying to hide it under a facade of toughness, and Milli hating Ziggy for being a pervert and hiding his sorcerous abilities and list of enemies from the rest of the team, to name several recent examples).
Yay! Thank you. Guys, take a bow.

Some time in the next 24 hours (probably) the arrival of the relatively straightforward (I say "relatively") To The Gate. Only three inserted scenes so far! :eek:

Joe Dizzy

03-23-2004, 06:27 AM

Originally posted by Zeiram
Joe, I think that was referring to the Locker Room festivities.

I thought so.

But it was supposed to be more childish pranking than, you know, sexual perversion on Ziggy's part.

Joe

NPC Unreg

03-23-2004, 07:17 AM

Are you people still talking?

Christ.

morgue

03-23-2004, 08:05 AM

Originally posted by NPC Unreg
Are you people still talking?

Christ.

*gives troll desired response*

Now go away.

Emprint

03-23-2004, 10:10 AM

Much awesomeness, again. Interestingly, I assumed all through that the other players knew what was going on.

My favorite bit? Milli trying to figure out if Jake likes her by pretending to be interested in herself. Beautiful.

Craig Oxbrow

03-30-2004, 09:34 AM

The Watch House 2.5: To The Gate

Milli: currently miserable punkette Watcher trainee
Ziggy: genuinely concerned about Milli
Jake: worried about how Milli feels about him
William: Mister Watcher Trainee (this week played by guest player John of Contested Ground)
Andy: quiet unassuming hereditary lycanthrope
Jack: rugby-playing civilian, fallen in with the Watch and out with the squad

Escher: gruffer than usual Watchers' trainer
Emma: Jake's sarky spellcasting Scottish SO
Liz: Andy's enthusiastic younger sister

Previously on The Watch House:

Liz turning up unexpectedly.

Andy: Ah. Guys, this is Liz. My sister.
Liz: So these are the -
Andy: Uh, yeah. Milli, Dorkface Jerk Idiot (to Ziggy), Jack, William, Jake. He's in a band.
Milli: Dorkface Jerk Idiot. I like that.
Andy: And what are you doing here, this being term time?
Milli: Yeah, don't you have school?

Milli and Ziggy waking up as each other.

"Ziggy": So, er, Jake, I've been thinking of getting a girlfriend recently.
Jake: Oh yeah? Anyone in mind?
"Ziggy": ...
Jake: (laughs) Again with the impossible women! Nah, dude, she'd kick your ass for even thinking about it.
"Ziggy": What?
Jake: Erm...nothing. You serious?
"Ziggy": So I just thought I'd, y'know, chat to you about it. Man to man. See what you think and all. How would you feel about it?
Jake: Why you asking me? What you trying to suggest?
"Ziggy": I dunno... it wouldn't bother you or anything?
Jake: I'm with Emma!
"Ziggy": Right. (pause) So, it'd be fine by you then.
Jake: I guess! Cos like, I have a girlfriend. So why would it matter to me?

Ziggy and Milli returning to their own bodies.

Milli admitting what happened to Escher, and breaking down in tears.

Escher: You want to keep this secret?
Milli: Yeah...
Escher: From anyone in particular?
Milli: Yeah...
Escher: Jake.
Escher: It's alright. I won't tell a soul.
Escher: I'll never tell him.

--

We open on Emma and Jake walking across the court.

Emma: So I was thinking, after the meeting we could duck out and catch that movie?
Jake: Oh, sure.
Emma: If there isn't anything important, obviously... If nothing else, we can avoid Andy's sister and her video diary...

Cut to Liz (Honeysuckle Weeks (http://www.honeysuckleweeks.co.uk/ams01hws.jpg)) beaming into her video camera.

Liz: The Video Diary of Elizabeth Suzanne Sampson, teenage runaway and occult warrior princess!
(Derek: (groans) Oh God...)

She picks up the camera and spins it around.

Liz: This is Mister Escher's house. He's a Watcher. Now, our family has a history with the Watchers going back, oh, centuries. These days we get on well enough that, if need be, we can crash in their spare rooms!... Although he has stayed up till he was sure Andy was asleep every night we've been here...

Liz: And now we're getting ready for the daily meeting to talk about Watchery activities... let's go inside!

Milli sits with her arms folded and head bowed, back from the table. Ziggy glances over at her and she doesn't look back. Jake and Emma arrive all smiles, see Milli and their expressions turn concerned. Liz films things. Escher shuffles his papers and exhales pointedly, glancing at the camera now and then, then begins.

Escher: Good morning everyone. (coldly to Jake) Good of you to join us.
Jake: Um, right.
Escher: Now, no real movement as regards this Skel situation. His accomplice MacNamara hasn't done anything to merit charges... here... and apparently the estate agents found the key they "misplaced".
Milli: Hrm.
Escher: Other than that. Nothing currently pressing.
Liz: Wasn't that exciting? (sticks her tongue out)
Escher: (glowers at Liz) Of course I need not remind you that situations can arise with no prior warning...

And as he says that, we cut to another book-lined meeting room.

Marty: Long years have we prepared for this! Everything must be ready! Tomorrow night the stars align and the Gate opens - and we shall rule the Earth!

The speaker, a young man in a sober suit called Marty Gramercy (Tom Hardy (http://www.planet-trek.de/pre16.jpg)), raises his glass - and a dozen glasses raise with his! And then a dozen more!

Credits!

Craig Oxbrow

03-30-2004, 09:40 AM

Liz tags along with the assembled group as they head for the pub.

Liz: Now, for my Video Diary, I really want to see what your life's like. So I want to ask all your friends some questions. About you, about college, about Watcher... dom...
Andy: Isn't that like classified?
Jake: Isn't that boring?
Liz: Well, I won't be showing this to anybody... and no, I don't think it'll be boring...

As the group enter the pub for a stay of hours.

Jack: Milli's round!

Milli glares and says nothing.

Andy: What?
Milli: I don't have any money.
Ziggy: Jack's round.
Jack: Why?
Ziggy: Because of the money you have that we don't.
Ziggy: Nuh-uh.
Andy: Why not? You aren't still pissed about that car we trashed?
Ziggy: He has a car now? Let's go for a drive!
Jake: Let it go, man.
Emma: That car saved the world. Well, at least the city. And us.
Ziggy: Now, let's not get off track. I saved the world.
Andy: With the help of the car.
Liz: You guys saved the world?
Andy: Nah, just the city.

Ziggy studies Milli.

Milli: What?
Ziggy: You're being quiet. You didn't try to hit me once all day.
Milli: I could hit you now if you want.
Ziggy: Ah, no! No... It wouldn't be from the heart. Or in your case the knee.

Liz looks curiously at them, and zooms in.

Andy: Turn that off...
Liz: But this is your social circle. Y'know, the people who stuck by you through thick and thin, you laugh together, fight together...
Jack: So why are you shooting this?
Milli: And not, I dunno, touristy views and things?
Liz: Well, I'll hopefully be going to college in a year and a bit, and I'd like to see what there is for me, with or without Watcher... ness.
Milli: So, gonna tape your friends?
William: Ooh, what kind of camera is it?
Liz: It's just a handycam. It's got a playback screen though.

Ziggy: You're even less chipper than usual.
Milli: I don't do 'chipper'.
Ziggy: Sure you do. With the fighting and the laughing, and that time you ran after me.
Milli: If you remember, that was to kick you.
William: (playing with the camera) That would look really good in slow motion.
Milli: In fact, you don't want to remind me of that. Just kick you again.
Andy: (to Liz) You know how we have lunar cycles? So does Milli.
Milli: And if you try to imply that it's my time of the month... you want kicks as well?

Milli: If you could not have the camera, or you might not have the camera. You know, you drop things, they get broken...

William: Can I... get a look at your camera?
Ziggy: Worst euphemism ever...
Andy: Grrr...
William: What? I wanna look at her camera.
Andy: And you were buying her alcohol earlier...
William: Honest mistake...
Andy: If you buy my sister alcohol... don't. Okay?
William: Huh? Ooh, look, eight times zoom!

Emma: Aaaaanyway, we have a movie to go see.
Jake: Yeah.
Milli: And, uh, I've got lectures.
Ziggy: (looks at his watch) In the morning?

William, being the diligent Prentice Watcher, "accidentally" rewinds the tape.

Andy: Ahem.
William: Mm-hmm?
Andy: Hm.
William: Mmm. Great camera. Very good.

He somewhat warily hands it back. Liz puts it away with a slight "hmph".

Milli pulls a book out of her bag.

Ziggy: Are you okay?
Milli: Feeling fine. Look, I'm studying.
Ziggy: See, not quite fine. If you wanna talk to me...
Milli: Studying. Gonna be a Watcher. Brushing up on my Watcherness. To be a Watcher.
Ziggy: Have you though about a job as, say, a cab driver in New York?
Milli: Are there demons and Slayers there?
Ziggy: Uh, well, there are demons anyway.
Milli: I can't drive anyway.
Ziggy: It's New York. No-one can drive.
Milli: I'd imagine the cab drivers have to.
Ziggy: ...
Jack: Why are you so down?
Milli: I'm not down. I'm studying.
Ziggy: You're studying when we should be having fun at the pub.
Milli: Right. Sorry.
Jack: You just apologised to Ziggy.
Milli: Oh.

And she smacks Ziggy upside the head.

Ziggy: Ow!
Jack: That's better.
Ziggy: When you care too much you get hit.
Milli: Nobody accused you of caring too much.

Liz: So, do they do this a lot?
Andy: Keeps us occupied while we wait for Big Bads to turn up.
Liz: Does that happen a lot?
Andy: More than I'd like.
Milli: I'm trying to study...

William returns from the bar, looks at the cover and nods. "Feeding Habits And Territories Of The Garchrest Demons Of The Seventh Circle."

William: Oh, good book. Got a great ending.
Milli: It's non-fiction.
William: I know. The ending is how to kill them.

Milli nods slightly and returns to her reading. Silence falls. Ziggy kicks William under the table and points at Milli when he jumps. William gets it and glares at Ziggy.

Milli: Are you kicking William?

And she kicks Ziggy.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

03-30-2004, 09:42 AM

Jack: So did you turn up at that School Disco after all?
Milli: No.
Jack: But you got all tarted up...
Milli: I wasn't "tarted up". I happened to wear a skirt. Drop it.
Jack: But -
Milli: Drop. Drop!
Jack: I just -
Milli: Do you wanna be kicked?
Jack: Ziggy -
Milli: Ziggy has mental problems that I can't explain.
Ziggy: ...
Milli: He cannot trust people and tell people things.
Ziggy: I tell things. Listen...

Everyone looks at him.

Ziggy: ... When I was seven I chipped a tooth. See? This one.
William: That'd be an adult tooth. So you were more like eleven... you have no memory of seven to eleven?
Ziggy: No!
Andy: So what happened?
Ziggy: Well, there was a bar fight...
Liz: And you were eleven?
Ziggy: Yes. And I'm actually white. I just haven't washed.
Milli: I can believe that.
Andy: And I lost a leg... and it grew back.
William: Really? I've read about lycanthropic regeneration... any chance I could study it?
Liz: You're not studying my brother's regeneration!

Jack kicks Ziggy.

Ziggy: Dude. You kick like a girl. (points at Milli) And I don't mean her.
Jack: Uh, yeah, well, there's not that much kicking in rugby.
Liz: So what is there in rugby? I bet it's good training for action.
Jack: Well, yes, definitely. As well as hand-to-hand and grappling, you need good hand-eye co-ordination...

Liz listens, fascinated. Everyone else ignores him. William tunes out and reads over Milli's shoulder.

Jack: Come on, you, let's play pool. I need to demonstrate my co-ordination.
William: And I can beat you with math.
Jack: Hrm... wanna make it interesting? Watchers versus the rest?
Ziggy: Nah.
Milli: Studying.
Jack: Oh come on.
Milli: Do you have any idea how many of these kinds of books there are?
William: Eight hundred and forty in Escher's library.
Jack: Look, how about this... we play for forfeits. The team that loses has to do what the winners want for twenty-four hours.
William: Well, I don't know how imaginative we can be there.
Ziggy: You could try your regeneration experiment.
William: Ooh, yeah...
Andy: Ooh, no!
Liz: Shut up!

Jack: Okay, simple forfeits, agreed beforehand? So no making Milli walk around naked or anything.
Liz: You went to that very quickly.
Milli: Yeah, you did, first suggestion.
Jack: Of what not to do!

Milli: So about this regeneration, what about a tail?
William: Yes, what bit of you corresponds to a tail? Just the vestigial tailbone?
Ziggy: Y'know, if I tell Charlotte this, how do you think she'll react?
William: I've made sure that she knows you're mad. And you'd be talking about me cutting bits off of werewolves.

Andy: Oh... kay. When you lose, you clean my room.
Milli: In just twenty-four hours?
Andy: Well, as much as you can do.
William: And when you lose, you catalogue the books... No, that's too much fun.
Milli: I don't really want to do this.
Jack: Oh, c'mon!
Ziggy: Okay, do you want me to kick him? I want me to kick him.
William: Why can't we put them back to things we'll do?
Ziggy: Rounds of drinks?
Milli: In that case I'm not gonna bother.
Ziggy: Fine. I'm gonna go to lectures.

William sniffs Ziggy's glass.

Jack: Anyway, since we argued instead of playing, I got practice. Come along. I need a cheering section.
Milli: Studying.
Jack: C'mon. Don't you want to see me get beaten up?
Ziggy: Not unless she does it.
Jack: Then you should join the team...
Milli: I don't think I'm much of a rugby playing person. I'd keep trying to stake the ball. Or the other team. Or you.
Andy: I would, but it always reminds me of playing fetch.

Everyone looks at Andy, then Liz. She smirks.

Liz: I didn't say anything, I swear.
Jack: Oh-kay...
Liz: Although, y'know...
Andy: Don't talk about bones. Don't like bones...
Liz: Since when?

As she skips off...

Jack: How do these people put up with her?
Milli: Andy's her brother and William's wonderful.
Jack: William's not paying attention and Andy could tear her apart.
Milli: If Andy didn't tear her apart when they were kids...

Milli: Can't study here, I'm going to the office.
William: I could come with you, I suddenly want to look at the books on werewolves... but I have a lecture. Oh, Liz, would you like to take your camera to the lecture? It's on Minoan pottery.
Liz: Oh, will there be actual pottery?
William: Ah... no. But there may be a slide show!
Liz: Nah. Cheers.

To get away from Jake and Emma, Ziggy, Liz... just about everyone really... Milli goes to her afternoon. And there she gets a good look at the Classics Society... Marty Gramercy and his little clique.

Marty: Oh look, it's the fringe element.
Sidekick: Now now, Marty, the Sex Pistols put their album out more than twenty-one years ago, I think it qualifies as a classic by now.
Marty: Hardly the sort of thing we discuss here though. And to think, her father was head of this society back in his day.

Milli shakes her head as she withdraws to the office to get away from it all - apart from William, tagging along - and they find Escher absent... and one of the drawers in his card catalogue slightly open.

William looks around warily...

William: Is Mister Escher around?
Milli: Haven't seen him in a while.
William: The card index is open.
Milli: Oh no.
William: It's open at a book which is... should be here...
Milli: I'm gonna call him.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

03-30-2004, 09:44 AM

Escher: Ah, hello, something wrong?
Milli: Missing book.
William: Missing book is... Kessler's Treatise on Places of Summoning in the British Isles.
Milli: So if this is something you want to worry about, start worrying.
Escher: Right.
Milli: Ziggy?
Escher: It certainly fits his M.O. Not sure about summoning though. Call Oxford and see what they know.
William: (looking at the slot) Too thick to prop up a table...

Milli calls Zig.

Milli: So are you stealing Mister Escher's books?
Ziggy: Hello Milli, how are you?
Milli: Fine. So are you stealing Mister Escher's books?

Liz tapes Jack's manly sports activities, smiling, wincing when it looks like he's going to get hurt. Andy glowers.

William makes a call and gets through to Prudence Pryce, Invigilator of the Prentices of Magdalen College, Oxford.

William: Good afternoon, ma'am. It's William Grove, at King's. We seem to be missing a book.
Pru: Again?
William: Uh, yes. We think it's Ziggy but he isn't talking.
Pru: (sighs) Which one?
William: Kessler's Treatise on Places of Summoning in the British Isles. Any chance you could look for anything in this area, soon?
Pru: Of course. Kessler, Kessler... Cambridge... ah. Gate into Sorcos, summoning Sorcanis, stars in alignment over the city around 10.30 to 11.30 on the night of the spring equinox. Which is...?
William: Tonight.
Pru: That's correct. Well done, William.

Milli: Do we have a more definite location for it?
William: Not yet. We need more clues... where's Jake?

Cut to Jake sitting, and Emma resting her head on his shoulder and snagging some of his popcorn. Jake looks over with a slight smile, then back down, looking at neither Emma nor the screen, thinking...

And back to Milli, sighing.

Milli: At the movies. With Emma.
William: Right. Um. Well, we can look up where this gate leads. Sorcos...
Escher: (arriving) Sorcos. Home to the demon hierarchy of the same name. Sorcanis... a major member of the Sorcos family. Able to assume a "pleasing shape" and pass for human, but also has an armoured form. Also able to barter souls for power, luck, things like that.
William: Will this work inside the Shield?
Milli: Probably.
Milli: Vulnerabilities?
Escher: The usual really. The Sorcos underbelly isn't so well protected, apparently...

Liz drags Andy along to the office. Milli grimaces.

Liz: So, what's going on? Something dangerous?
Escher: Ah, hopefully not. But one never knows.
William: But we need to double-check the catalogue first. We should hit the books.
Milli: I'm already hitting the books. (smacks the cover of the book on Sorcos)
Liz: Right, well, while you do that, can I ask you some questions?

Everyone looks at each other. Milli looks at the floor.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

03-30-2004, 09:46 AM

Liz's Questions!

(In bright pink pen with a big smiley sun drawn in the border)

How did you come to be a Watcher? Or work with them if you're not one?

Milli: (after a long silence glaring at the camera) My parents are Watchers. I wasn't really supposed to be one, but when you go out into the Real World, (capitalisation is obvious here) you discover that there are some things that you don't really get to decide about yourself. Being a Watcher is apparently one of them.

Jake: Bit of a coincidence really. I was looking to join various clubs and stuff when I came at first, and bumped into Milli and William at the History soc. They came along to one of my gigs, and the rest, as they say is history. Funny thing was Esher kinda knew about me anyway. Secret files or something, so they would have found me if I hadn't found them. They're kinda like that. They get to you... (takes a draw on his cigarette) get under your skin.

Emma: Well, I'm not actually, I'm a, er, spellcaster. They were trying to stop someone using magic and I spotted him too and I agreed to help.

William: Ancient family tradition. And I was Hall Monitor at the Academy.

Jack: I got dragged in by vampires. Milli and William saved my life. And Ziggy was there too.

Andy: You already know dammit!

Ziggy: That's an interesting question. Next!

How did you find out about Andy's condition?

Andy: Hmm, I woke up one morning, the curtains and all my clothes were torn and everyone was at me with pitchforks...

Milli: I kinda worked it out for myself. When he changed into a massive hairy beast-thing with claws. I'm smart like that.

William: (frowns) Rather suddenly.

Emma: When he turned into a big monster.
Liz: Oh, um, was that scary?
Emma: Just a bit, yeah...

Jake: When he turned?... Changed? What's the word you prefer? Yeah, it was a bit of a shock, but he did 'save the day!'

Ziggy: We fought a huge ugly thing in a church together. He went all hairy and killed it. He's good at that.

Jack: He turned into a big mons... uh... he saved my life. Great guy!

How did you come to accept Andy for who, and what, he is?

Emma: Erm...
Liz: Oh God, you haven't, have you?
Emma: Um... (looks at her shoes)

Milli: I've had what most people would call "abnormal" stuff drilled into me from a very impressionable age. It's kinda hard to be afraid of a werewolf when you know demons who insist on pointing out they knew you when you were (she holds hand out to knee level) this high.

Jake: I guess, when you're a bit out of the norm yourself, it's easier to see things from others' point of view.

Emma: Um...

Jack: Oh, he's a great guy. Really saves the day a lot. Really good to have in a fight too.

Andy: (grins) He's a great guy. Really good looking, smart, funny...

William: (flatly) He's been very helpful.

Ziggy: I don't quite understand what you mean. Who or what is he that I'm supposed to accept him as?
Liz: You know... a 'werewolf'.
Ziggy: Oh right... that. (pause) Well, he's got it under control. That means it's his private business and therefore none of mine.

Emma: Next question?

What's college life like?

Emma: (sunny again) Oh, it's really good.

Milli pauses, and fumbles in her pockets for her cigarettes. After she's found them, lit one and taken a deep breath, she begins to speak.

Milli: Erm...college. It's...erm...well, it's probably a lot like school, except that there's loads of other stuff you could be doing instead of the studying, and a hell of a lot less work. And there's no one to make sure people like Ziggy actually go to their classes. Which there probably should be. Mister Escher tries, but he really doesn't do a whole lot about it.

Emma: I'm studying social history, how different societies have viewed magic and comparative mythology structures. I'm learning a lot, and it's really good having friends who know about the magic and all.

Jake: College life, well, yeah, it has its ups and downs, just like everything else.

Andy: It's great. I get up every afternoon, go to the pub, go clubbing, get wasted. Bit of a strain round full moon, but I'm in control...

Ziggy: It's tedious and boring, to be honest.

William: It's great! All the chances to learn!

Jack: S'okay...

Is the Watch an added burden or something you're glad to do?

Milli: (frowns, and then shrugs) I didn't mind it so much at first. It was nearly fun for a while, like being a kinda cross between a detective and a Slayer - you do you know what a Slayer is, right? - but lately, it's...eh...it's gotten a lot more difficult. (She adds in hurriedly "The Watch, I mean", and then looks around nervously). But in a way, I've been training for this stuff all my life, so it's no big deal to me.

Jake: (stubs his cigarette out in a full ashtray, looks up through narrowed eyes, maybe from the smoke). It's kinda like, some students have a job in McDonalds, we do this. You can get through weeks without too many shifts, and still do your studies, go to the pub, jam with the band, then sometimes, you know, you just gotta go save the world!

Jake gives Liz a wry smile.

Liz: Save the world?
Jake: The guys are cool though, most of the time. They make it easy.

Ziggy: Well, it passes the time. And seriously, it's not even half as hard they make it sound. Sitting around, teasing Milli, drinking booze, teasing Milli some more... not much to it really.

William: It's a higher calling. And I'd be glad to do it even if it wasn't.

Andy: Hell yeah. I'm gonna show those old men I'm capable of killing vampires as well as anyone. And I'm not dangerous. Except to evil people.

Jack: College is the added burden to this really. (smirks)

Emma: Oh, well, um, I'm glad to help, of course.

Is it dangerous? Is it scary? Is it fun sometimes?

Emma: Yes, quite often, I guess it can be fun to look back on sometimes but generally, well, no.

Andy: You know, the intrigue, the mystery, the action. It's cool...

Jake: It can be a bit of a kick (heh), yeah. (Jake lights up another ciggy, inhales, and blows out thoughtfully). I guess all of the above.

Ziggy: Well, if it wasn't fun, I wouldn't be doing it right? Is it scary and dangerous? I guess it can be. You could get alcohol poisoning, or a flat butt... or even... (gulp) a bad hair day. Wait, how's my hair?

Milli: Dangerous? Not really. Scary? (she shrugs again) I don't really think so. Once you're not afraid of the dark or anything, then no. Once you've gotten over the fear of getting hurt (she sighs, almost imperceptibly) then you're most of the way there.

William: Of course it can be dangerous, and scary. It isn't a game, you know. Although it can be fun sometimes, sure.

Jack: Nah, it's not scary. I know the guys like Milli and Andy will look out for us. And after you've seen Andy fight, monsters aren't that scary.
Liz: You think he's scary?
Jack: Ah, no... With you he might be a teddy bear, but when we're fighting he can be vicio... uh, I mean, he's really tough.

Milli: Is it fun? Hmmm. (She looks sideways at the ground) Mostly, no. No, it's really, really not. But in saying that, I guess I'd never have met... y'know... The Others (capitalisation is also obvious here) if I wasn't part of the Watch, so that must mean something, I suppose.

Is it something you'd recommend?

Jack: I guess...

Ziggy: No. This is something you usually get sucked into. Therefore your life has to suck big time first, before you end up here. And why should I recommend that? My advice to you, kid: don't be a Watcher. Go be a veterinarian or a poet or whatever thing it is you want to do. Don't waste your time. Seriously.

Andy: Yeah, go to a university that's not near me...

Emma: Uh... If... if you think you can help, I guess... kinda...

Jake: Not to anyone. Unless they were screwy to start with.

William: Definitely.

Milli's eyes widen, and she turns angrily towards Liz.

Milli: Something I'd recommend? Do you even know what it is we do here? It's not a society, y'know! Do you think we do all this because we feel like it? Being part of the Watch is something you are or you're not, and no amount of hanging around with it or avoiding it like the plague can change that! Do you really think I'd...

She pauses here, and realises she's shouting. She sighs, loudly.

Milli: Look, I'm sorry. But that was a really stupid question.

She sighs again, and looks up, drained.

Milli: Can I go now?

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

03-30-2004, 09:48 AM

Jake and Emma return, she with her arm around his waist. Seeing the expressions...

Jake: What have we missed?
William: Demon summoning book theft. Any chance you could look at the evidence?
Jake: Sure.
William: No visions? No luck predicting it? Would it help if I made you a cup of tea?

Picking up the index card, Jake gets a brief image of the hand holding it, a forearm with a skull and dagger tattoo... He takes out a pencil and draws the image on the back of the card.

William: Nnngh...
Emma: Are you okay?
Jake: What?
William: No, it's okay! Whatever you need to do!... was it in pencil at least?

Showing the picture around gets blank looks, as well as a glower from Escher, until it reaches Liz. She switches on her video camera and slots in the tape of the rugby practice...

Liz: Look.
Jack: Barry.

Jack grimaces as he recognises the tattoo on the arm of Barry, one of the leading rugby gits.

Jake: So what are the rugby club doing stealing books?
William: Demons that grant power and appear in pleasing form.
Jake: Demons that do stuff for you and can look like anyone.
Emma: Eww.
Jack: Barry... Barry has always sort of been... Barry.

Milli and Escher head into the stacks to look for more on Sorcos Demons.

Escher: Well, what's our prime suspect like?
Jack: It'd be odd if he wasn't in the pub.
Jake: He's stealing books. I think "odd" is a good place to start.
Ziggy: That's the strangest thing I've heard all week.
Jack: I say we beat a confession out of him.
Ziggy: I say Jack beats a confession him.
Jack: How about Milli tries?
Jake: A rugby guy goes over and hits another one. Nothing unusual there. A girl goes over and smacks him around, people might think that was a bit strange.
Jack: She could seduce him...

Jack, being a great believer in the "go for it" method of planning, gives Barry a call.

Jack: Alright mate, what you up to?
Barry: Oh, not that much right now. Got a thing on in the evening though...
Jack: Oh yeah? Not too early I hope. Because there's a relatively hot girl that wants to meet you...

Andy suppresses a snigger. Jack kicks him.

Barry: Relatively hot, eh? Not that little redhead is it?
Jack: Ah, no! No! But anyway, how about... (looks at his watch, sees it's about five) seven?
Barry: Cool.

Milli returns.

Ziggy: So, what are you thinking, are you gonna dress as a girl or...

Jack looks at Mill.

Milli: What...?
Liz: Apparently you're relatively hot.
Milli: Huh?

Escher returns, brandishing a book.

Escher: Judging by the book we're missing, they're planning to call something up. Probably the standard money and power deal. Probably won't succeed. The only concern is that they'll probably do it inside the Shield... and that they may try it with a sacrifice... or they could be wiped out if they don't.

Jack: We can get Barry out of his room so we can search it.
Milli: Yeah...?
Ziggy: Andy, Jake, remember the next time we let Jack do something, we hit ourselves. (smacks himself upside the head)

Jack: Jake, you break in.
Liz: You break into places?
Jake: Hey, it's student accommodation.
Milli: And I'm...
Ziggy: Yeah, Jack set you up with -
Emma: A possibly evil rugby player.
Milli: Wait, huh?
Andy: Can't Michelle do it?
Jake: She's a civilian.
Emma: And they probably know Michelle.

Milli: So what's the...?
Ziggy: Jack set you up with a possibly evil rugby guy.
Milli: Wait... explain it to me like I'm two...

Jake: Okay. Jack suggested that Barry go meet a girl at the pub at seven. That gets him out of the house so we can search it. He's probably sorting himself out for the ritual with the book. And you're the girl.
Ziggy: Or, plan B, we turn him into a toad. Ooh, toad, let's do that!
Milli: Well, it's kind of workable.
Ziggy: No it's not!
Milli: Sorry.
Ziggy: Look, I went to this lecture, and this guy next to me Philippe told me this story and you have to be like the 'ippopotamooz!
Almost everyone: Huh?
Ziggy: The 'ippopotamooz wasn't happy with being grey all the time, so he decided to try something else. He put on stripes like a zebra, but everyone said "it's a 'ippopotamooz with stripes!" So he tried spots like a leopard, and everyone said "it's a 'ippopotamooz with spots!" So he decided "I will be 'ippopotamooz!" and he's happy! 'appy like the 'ippopotamooz!
Emma: Uh... how is that relevant?
Milli: ... So where do I have to meet him?
Jack: The point of the story is that people should be themselves.
Ziggy: The worry is that Jack gets it.
Milli: I get it but, yeah, what is the relevance?
Ziggy: You're just going along with things. You don't react in the usual way. Instead, you mope.
Milli: So you want me to... (kicks Jack)
Jack: Ow!
Milli: (sighs) I can bring my books to the bar.
Jack: Don't think of it as dating a rugby player...
Andy: Think of it as taking one for the team!

Ziggy: I just want you to not be miserable.
Milli: No I'm not. I'm perfectly happy.
Ziggy: No you're not.
Milli: Yes I am!
Ziggy: No! I remember when the very thought of something evil would have you chasing out that door to kill it!

Milli sighs.

Milli: They're stupid, not evil. I won't kill 'em because it'd be bad. Anyway, Jack came up with a plan. Traditionally stupid Jack plan. I kicked him. Now because I'm token girl I'm going to have to go along with it.
Ziggy: Pshaw.
Milli: I'm gonna go wait in the bar.

With that, Milli stomps out, slamming the door. The others round on Jack.

Jake: This has to be the worst plan ever.
Emma: You're lucky she's miserable, or she'd tear your head off.
Ziggy: It's not lucky. It sucks that she's miserable.

Emma nods and runs to catch Milli up. Jack shrugs off Ziggy's comment.

Jack: Just because you're sweet on Milli or...

Ziggy hits Jack.

Ziggy: It's called empathy, okay? It's the ability to actually tell when your friends feel bad.

Jake and Ziggy shake their heads and go to scout out Barry's room.

Jake: So, what you were talking to me about, that why you punched Jack?
Ziggy: Huh?
Jake: About Milli. Or did you go off the idea?
Ziggy: Uh... oh look, there's the door!

Jake gives Ziggy a funny look as he knocks on the door.

Barry: Yeah?
Jake: Good afternoon, we're from the library, we believe you have an overdue book, mind if we come in? (heads in before being invited)
Barry: Uh, yes?
Jake: Ah, yes, here it is, you won't be needing this any more, will you? There we are, see, due date on the cover... (snaps the book open and shut)
Barry: Huh?...

They hustle it out of there.

Barry: ... Hey!

Jake and Ziggy: Run!

Jake charges left. Ziggy runs right. Barry tackles him.

Jake: Get up!
Ziggy: I'm trying to, but there's this fat guy on top of me, see?

Milli sits in the Brody and reads. Emma sits opposite her, looking concerned, occasionally leaning into her field of view to get her to look up.

Ziggy manages to kick Barry off and stumble out into the court. Barry hangs back and makes a quick call.

Barry: Yeah, two of them took the book. Yeah... Really? Because he set me up on a date this evening... no, early... yeah, that guitar guy's got it.

Jake leans out of the alley where he hid as Barry heads off... and THUD. Someone knocks him down with a blow to the back of the head...

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

03-30-2004, 09:49 AM

Ziggy stumbles into the office.

Liz: Are you okay?
Ziggy: I got hit by a big dumbass guy.
William: But you're okay?
Ziggy: Yeah. Jake got the book.

William nods and heads off to gather the troops.

Jack: So you left a trail of destruction?
Ziggy: Jack, you shouldn't talk to me. You annoy me.

Jack irritably punches Ziggy in the gut. Ziggy collapses, clutching his ribs and wheezing.

Jake's vision swims and he sees a double-exposure of his attacker's really nice shoes, but none of the rest of him as he runs off. Checking his bag, he finds the book gone.

Jake: God DAMN it!

Liz: Are you okay?
Ziggy: (glaring at Jack, grimacing in pain) You touch me again and I'll break your skull.

William finds Milli and Emma still not talking, but they both share a concerned look as he comes in.

William: Jake and Ziggy changed the plan. Ziggy said Jake was on his way, he's got the book.

And then Jake stumbles in, clutching his head.

Emma: Oh God, are you okay?
Jake: Never better...

Supporting Jake on the way back to the office, they find Ziggy sitting and wincing, Jack keeping his distance, Escher glaring at him...

Milli: What happened?
Ziggy: I got tackled and then I got punched.
Milli: Who punched you?
Ziggy: Biggest bastard on the block. Jack. (points at Jack)
Milli: Jack punched you? Why?
Ziggy: Good question.
Jack: I didn't know he'd already been hit...
Escher: And that makes it alright?
Milli: Maybe you should put some ice on it.
Ziggy: Eh, I'll be (winces) okay, no stretching.
William: Actually, maybe you should get a nurse to check it.
Jake: Okay, you do that. And let's go kick the crap out of Barry. Make me feel better. Anyone?

Milli: I'm concerned about the plan. It's not there now. You (Jake) and Ziggy going after this guy on your own was a better plan?
Jake: Uh, well...
Milli: So what do we do now?
Jack: Go talk to Barry.
Jake: Yeah. You sit on him, I'll punch crap out of him.
Emma: So, are you sure you're okay?
Jake: I only got hit once.
Milli: Did you see who by?
Jake: Nope. But Barry was talking to somebody. He could describe us. Didn't know about Jack... does now.
Milli: So can you mess it up any more?
Jack: The plan was fine until you broke in and lost the book.

Jake glares at Jack and opens his mouth to answer, then looks at Milli's expression of genuine anger and hangs his head, saying nothing.

William gets a fax of the relevant pages from Oxford, does the math, and gasps. Everyone except Ziggy and Jake go over and look at it.

William: Leap years! Eight thirty!
Andy: But this isn't a leap year.
William: No, but we weren't counting leap years between when it was printed. Come on!

Jake: So what was up with that conversation we didn't have earlier?
Ziggy: Hmm… what conversation?
Jake: You were asking if it'd be any problem for me if you asked Milli out. You don't remember that?
Ziggy: I said "look, there's the door". I don't remember saying anything else.
Jake: Sure you did.
Ziggy: You calling me a liar?
Jake: No, I'm just saying you should be true to yourself. Be the hippopotamus.
Ziggy: I'm not telling you anything.
Jake: Okay, not talking to me again. Join the club.
Ziggy: Right.
Jake: Fine. If I'd known you were that fickle I wouldn't have asked.

Milli: Does it narrow it down any?
William: Yes... the gate will be passing over... Peterhouse.
Andy: That gives us about half an hour. Come on. I haven't beaten up enough people lately.

The group splits up. Escher and Liz stay behind. Jack, Jake, Andy and Emma go to see Barry. Milli and William get ready to scout out the site. Ziggy gets up to come with...

William: What if we find anything, do we call it in?
Milli: We don't need anybody else.
Ziggy: You're not that good.
Milli: I am that good. They're helping by looking in Barry's room.
Ziggy: I'm coughing up a lung here.
Milli: We told you to go get checked out...
Ziggy: Just let you two go? Forget it.
Milli: Do you have even a rough idea of how many we're facing... look, we could do with Andy. Jack'll just get chucked.
Ziggy: That'd be fine by me.
Milli: Did he really hurt you that badly?
Ziggy: Other than both sides of my ribcage I'm fine. But go ahead...

Milli: We will be around. We'll be fine.
Ziggy: (quietly) Not true.
Milli: Why was it not?
Ziggy: Because I know you're not fine.
Milli: What?
Ziggy: You're not fine. You're miserable. And the last thing we need is our fighting machine moping when you're facing a horde of evil frat boys.
Milli: I'm not moping. You go home.
William: Maybe go see a doctor...
Ziggy: Alright... If you need some firepower, call me. Don't call Emma. Call me.
Milli: Wasn't gonna need any.

Ziggy pushes himself up to stand.

Ziggy: I might go check with the nurse.
Milli: Okay. Should I come with you?
Ziggy: No. You have work to do.

Milli nods, and she and William head off. As they do, Ziggy collapses back into his chair, wincing in pain.

Arriving at Barry's door, Jack elects to go first. Jake ignores him and sneaks over to look in the window, seeing Barry's still inside. Jack heads over and knocks.

Barry: (flatly) Oh. Hello Jack. Here for the thing your little friends tried to steal?
Jack: Friends, little, stole something?
Barry: You know as well as I do.
Jack: Uh, no. No I don't.
Barry: Oh. Well, it's very hush-hush.
Jack: Really?

Hiding outside, Andy cracks his knuckles... then yelps in pain and shakes his hand.

Barry: Oh yes. Only for the elite. The cognos... kenti. Centi? Kenti.
Jack: Riiiiight... Anyway, I do know a bit. That girl you call a troll, she's involved. That weird Jamaican guy... And there's something about translocating the Atlantic.
Barry: (smugly) Treatise on summoning Sorcanis.
Jack: Huh?
Barry: We're a magic circle of power! How cool is that?
Jack: Oh, uh... very cool.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

03-30-2004, 09:51 AM

Jack: So is it just the one thing or have you been doing things before?
Barry: Well, just this as long as I've been involved.
Jack: So where is this?
Barry: C'mon, I'll show you.

And so the others shadow him over towards Peterhouse... as William and Milli spot two dozen people sneaking through the college towards picturesque Gisborne Court (here (http://www.pet.cam.ac.uk/images/display.html?image=album/Gisborne_court/Gisborne_court_05.jpg)).

Milli: The red things under their arms...
William: Those would be robes.
Milli: And that one in front, with a black robe and a big old book...
William: We're liking him for the big bad guy?
Milli: Yeah.

They gather around a chalk circle on the lawn, raising their hands to the dark, starry sky above.

And just then, Barry leads Jack in, the others sneak over to Mill and Will's vantage point, and the assembled circle turn.

Milli: It's Marty from the bloody Classics Society...

With a scowl, she unloads her crossbow. Skewering the book and pinning it shut.

The currently-unrobed types, clearly less dedicated, look around for exits. Those in robes draw ritual daggers. Still about sixteen of them.

William: Uh-oh.
Emma: That's all you can say? Uh-oh?

Marty drops the book and pulls out a cheat sheet...

Marty: Sorcanis, we beseech thee, come forth, in pleasing shape that thou not strike us mad, that we may parlay blood and souls for riches and power. We beseech thee! Come forth!

Silence.

Apart from the twang of a crossbow bolt thudding into the ground right in front of Marty.

He gulps and steps back. The circle spreads out.

Jake: So this was the nice quiet killing the book plan?

And with an angry yell, Milli charges.

Andy leaps down, shifting as he goes, weighing about twice as much when he lands on all fours. Even more of the circle scatter.

Milli drops her bag of weapons and pulls out a sword. Marty backs up, putting a few minions between himself and her.

Barry rounds on Jack. Jake uses the distraction to charge up and punch Barry across the jaw - then clutches his hand as the rugby git smirks.

Jack stumbles away, towards the retreating Marty.

Emma knees a passing Classics Society snob in the nuts.

William threatens several who were already trying to escape with his axe.

Andy uses his vantage point of being seven feet tall to knock the more determined knife-wielders on the head.

Milli reaches Marty, cutting his cheat sheet in two and levelling her sword at his throat.

Milli: Call your little kids off. Right now.

The smarter knife-wielders (well, smart is relative here) drop their weapons. Andy declaws and sways on his feet.

Jake: Good crowd control, man.
Andy: Seemed to work.
Jake: Do you have to go wolfy every time?

And then the air shifts suddenly as if forced back. The torches flicker and relight. And something stands in the centre of the chalk circle. A man... almost. He stretches lazily and opens a pair of lurid green eyes.

Sorcanis: Now... someone wants to make a deal?
Marty: I -

Milli jabs the blade a little closer to his throat.

Jack: Yes!
Jake: NO!
William: No deal here!
Jack: Yes we do! He goes away, we stay here! Deal?
Jake: If you ever use the word "we" around guys like this I'll bloody kill you!
William: No deal. Ignore the stupid one.
Barry: Actually, how about you kill Jack and his pals and take their souls?
Sorcanis: Done.

And with that, Sorcanis shifts into a seven-foot armoured monster (like this (http://www.almosthuman.net/DesignsPage/DesignsGalleryImages/Jpegs/beast01.jpg)).

All of the cult who weren't already fleeing start.

Jack, being unfortunately close, spots the underbelly weak spot and punches Sorcanis. It doesn't seem to appreciate this, and backhands him (only five feet, for those keeping score) into a nearby flailing minion.

Andy steadies himself, wolfs up and crashes into Sorcanis, claws scrabbling at its gut.

Jake stumble over to Milli's bag of weapons and snags one of her throwing daggers even as Milli pushes Marty over, charges sword raised, and takes a chunk out of Sorcanis's stomach.

Then one of her own throwing daggers slams into the demon. She stops, looks over at Jake, screams in incoherent rage, pulls the dagger out and rams the sword into Sorcanis's gut right up to its hilt.

Sorcanis stumbles back and collapses, landing dead right in front of Marty.

Milli rolls Marty over with a kick, puts a boot on his chest and the point of her sword, dripping green ichor, to his throat.

Milli: If you ever try anything like that again... No power or riches for you, little boy.

And with that, she storms off, pausing only to pick up her bag and grab another throwing dagger out of Jake's hand.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

03-30-2004, 09:52 AM

Professor Baker, Master of the College, arrives shortly after Inspector Arnold of Cambridgeshire CID. They talk things over briefly... The Inspector looks away first.

Baker: Considering those involved, I've suggested to the Inspector that we deal with this in-house.
Emma: They can do that?

The story is reported as nothing more than a society prank leading to some scorch marks on the Gisborne Court lawn. Escher makes sure that the late Sorcanis is quietly incinerated.

Milli finds that Ziggy was sensible enough to get Escher to take him to Casualty. She runs through what happened, leaving out the Jake and throwing daggers bit quite obviously.

Milli: How're you feeling?
Ziggy: I'm fine. A bit bruised on the sides. Looks worse than it is, really. As long as I keep my ribs away from angry rugby players, I'll be alright.

Milli: Well, would you be okay if I were to head off for a coupla days?
Ziggy: Why would you head off for a coupla days?
Milli: As you mentioned yourself, I haven't been feeling too well recently, so I'm going to go back to my parents' place for a bit, try and sort myself out. I'll be back in a few days.
Ziggy: Oh. (pause) Look, I'm not going to ask you why you're feeling so bad again, because you don't want to talk about it. I can respect that. Mind you, I don't think it's either smart or healthy, but it's your call. But in case you change your mind and need to talk, or vent even, I'm here. You have my number. If there's anything you need, like somebody to get angry at, give me a call. I'm good at that. As my being here can attest.
Milli: I'm fine. Well, I will be fine. Don't worry about it.

She ruffles his hair, and leaves before he can say anything else.

U2's With or Without You starts playing over the final montage sequence:

A completely defeated Milli arriving at her very confused parents' house. She doesn't say much, just goes in and drops her bag on her bed in her incredibly childish-looking room. Think lots of teddy bears and books, a room she hasn't used for more than a few days at a time since she was six or seven...

Jake and Emma sitting together in the gang's usual booth, Jake occasionally glancing at the space where Milli usually sits... then looking back as Emma looks over, smiling slightly but never losing his thoughtful expression...

Milli having a family dinner in stony silence; going for long solitary walks in the woods around the house; taking out her frustration on the trees in said woods...

Escher alone in his study, tie loose and top shirt button undone, reading a privately delivered letter with a scowl. He refills a glass of scotch and takes a large drink...

Milli sitting on her bed and gazing miserably out the window; and looking alternately depressed and irate...

Marty getting a thorough dressing-down from Professor Baker, taking it stoically, and leaving with an angry spark in his eye... which then briefly turns jet black...

Cuts from Milli resting head on elbows and looking out the window with tears rolling down her cheeks to Milli in the woods making matches out of some unsuspecting tree. Finally, a shot of her packing her bag again, looking back at her room with a wan smile, and closing the door.

Liz sitting in her room, brow furrowed, thoughtful and concerned as she speaks to the camera.

Liz: Well... this week I learned that the Watchers say they trust Andy, but they really don't... and that probably extends to me too... And I learned that, if a cult tries to summon a demon and they're an old student society, they can get off with a caution... This Watcher thing's more complicated than I thought. Maybe more complicated than I'd like...

And with that, she shuts off the camera.

CREDITS!
Final montage directed by Cat.
GRR! ARG!

Craig Oxbrow

03-30-2004, 09:54 AM

Next time on The Watch House:

A young man running, screaming, across a moonlit Cambridge green, pursued by something unseen.

Escher glowering as two young women follow him into his office.

Milli loading a tranquilliser gun with a look of grim determination.

Liz bursting into tears and running out of the office.

Andy snarling "I'm in control, okay?" and William and Emma backing away.

A shaggy, lycanthropic head rising to howl at the full moon over the King's College Chapel.

A brief flash of two monstrous figures fighting, snarling, claws flailing...

Escher V/O: The next episode of The Watch House is Cry Wolf.

--

Actual Play bit

Milli was so miserable this week that the final montage was designed by her player so that she doesn't have to do that again.

William was unexpectedly understudied by Notable Industry Figure John Wilson, who has since agreed to guest star over the holidays as a character who was going to be an NPC otherwise.

Ziggy's pep talk to Milli (while barely able to stand due to a tackle and a punch - he really doesn't have many Life Points) earned him the Support Your Local Hero DP award, for the first time this series.

This deliberately straightforward plot (essentially TWH versus the useless cult from the end of The Ninth Gate) went off just fine, as a backdrop to the Cast dealing with Liz at her most cheeky and enthusiastic. Milli being as down as she was caused some concern, but in the end it really added to the game, shifting the character dynamic greatly.

Next time (which is already in the can, it just needs to be written up) something straightforward again. Mostly...

thenewgirl

03-30-2004, 05:06 PM

Awesome, as usual. Well done everyone!

It's bit a bit of a sad couple of weeks for Buffy spin-off fans everywhere hasn't it?
*sigh*

Looking forward to the next game write-up very much!

Craig Oxbrow

03-30-2004, 05:37 PM

See, this is the kind of audience feedback we like. :D

colbabe

03-30-2004, 10:36 PM

Originally posted by Craig Oxbrow
William makes a call and gets through to Prudence Pryce, Invigilator of the Prentices of Magdalen College, Oxford.

Dammit! Steve, I want crossover action in our game! Want want!

thenewgirl

03-30-2004, 11:19 PM

Originally posted by colbabe
Dammit! Steve, I want crossover action in our game! Want want!
I want Charlie and Milli to meet! :D

Burgonet

03-30-2004, 11:39 PM

I want Eddie to meet Saint Peter!

...

Oh, wait. I guess we already did that.

;)

[Am reading das threade Craig, have just been impotently silent. I'd comment further on this cross-over thang... but I'm on my 8th beer. But will say that I am enjoying proceedings. And there SHOULD BE A CROSS OVER, DAMMIT!!!]

sasori

03-31-2004, 04:16 AM

Originally posted by Craig Oxbrow
Jake: worried about how Milli feels about him

Not quite how I figured it, but I guess that's how some people might see it...

They're just down on the man 'cos he's cool! ;)

sasori

03-31-2004, 04:18 AM

Originally posted by thenewgirl
I want Charlie and Milli to meet! :D

Who Charlie??:confused:

Coffee_Lifeform

03-31-2004, 04:21 AM

Originally posted by sasori
Who Charlie??:confused:

That's what I want to know - and if it's a male or female PC. Cos, y'know, Milli's on the lookout for a new Twu Wuv...

sasori

03-31-2004, 04:24 AM

Originally posted by Coffee_Lifeform
That's what I want to know - and if it's a male or female PC. Cos, y'know, Milli's on the lookout for a new Twu Wuv...

If it's a girl, can 'Jake' watch? Just think of the umm, angst ...yeah ...that's it angst that that would cause!:D

Ducks to avoid Emma's slap!

Burgonet

03-31-2004, 04:25 AM

Originally posted by sasori
Who Charlie??:confused:

Charlie is the newgirl in Season 2 of The Night Watch.

I could post links, but it would perhaps be better if Craig did, since this is his thread.

:)

Eddie would love to have met most of your cast, by the way.
A bit hard now, being that he's DEAD! AUGH! I CANNOT GO ON!!

....

Okay now. Craig, should I link, or might you care to have the honours?

:)

sasori

03-31-2004, 04:27 AM

Originally posted by SALette
Charlie is the newgirl in Season 2 of The Night Watch.

So you want Charlie to get ideas from Milli, or to give her advice, or just to get the pair of them, to gang up on every one else?

I guess I'll just have to wait for the link to see what this lass is all about...

Coffee_Lifeform

03-31-2004, 04:29 AM

Originally posted by sasori
If it's a girl, can 'Jake' watch? Just think of the umm, angst ...yeah ...that's it angst that that would cause!:D

Ducks to avoid Emma's slap!

You're saying that in front of Milli, and you're worried about *Emma's* slap?!?!

*launches roundhouse kick at "Jake"'s head just to make a point*

And I think you guys should just post links. Craig might not be here for whole minutes, and my lunchhour is short...

Burgonet

03-31-2004, 04:31 AM

Originally posted by sasori
So you want Charlie to get ideas from Milli, or to give her advice, or just to get the pair of them, to gang up on every one else?

I guess I'll just have to wait for the link to see what this lass is all about...

Aw, stuff it. Craig, if you want me to remove the link, by all means pm me or such, and I shall.

Now, read on from here, gentle reader -

Night watch season 2 - about where Charlie shows up (http://forum.rpg.net/showthread.php?s=&threadid=97116&perpage=20&pagenumber=3)

sasori

03-31-2004, 04:31 AM

Originally posted by Coffee_Lifeform
*launches roundhouse kick at "Jake"'s head just to make a point*

I guess that's a no then huh! :(

sasori

03-31-2004, 04:40 AM

Originally posted by SALette

Now, read on from here, gentle reader -

Night watch season 2 - about where Charlie shows up (http://forum.rpg.net/showthread.php?s=&threadid=97116&perpage=20&pagenumber=3)

so, is she pychic, or just fast?

excuse my dumbness, it's been a hard day already...

Craig Oxbrow

03-31-2004, 04:44 AM

Originally posted by Coffee_Lifeform
You're saying that in front of Milli, and you're worried about *Emma's* slap?!?!

*launches roundhouse kick at "Jake"'s head just to make a point*

And I think you guys should just post links. Craig might not be here for whole minutes, and my lunchhour is short...
Ach. SAL's fast like the ninja. Never mind.

Charlie's a telekinetic, among other things.

And personally, I'd always be worried how Milli feels about me... :D

Anyways. Writeups. Happy?

Burgonet

03-31-2004, 04:47 AM

Originally posted by sasori
so, is she pychic, or just fast?

excuse my dumbness, it's been a hard day already...

Why don't you ask her, yourself?

;)

Hell, being dead, I shouldn't even be posting here.
St. Peter had to take a whizz, and thought I'd use the bandwidth of the Afterlife for something more useful than downloading Angel porn (pun intended!).

;)

Burgonet

03-31-2004, 04:48 AM

Originally posted by Craig Oxbrow
Ach. SAL's fast like the ninja. Never mind.

A very drunk Ninja.

Hard to (Tawny) Port!

:p

Coffee_Lifeform

03-31-2004, 04:49 AM

Originally posted by Craig Oxbrow
Ach. Never mind.

Personally, I'd always be worried how Milli feels about me... :D

's easy. Milli's feelings towards people goes something along the lines of "hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, ohhhhhh Jake, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, ZIGGYI'MGONNAKILLYOUaaarrrrGGGHHH!!!, hate, hate, hate, hey William, hate, hate hate..."

She's quite a straightforward girl, is Milli. And yeah - I think her and Charlie should meet, although I don't think Milli would ever resort to using...

...hmmm...*eyes narrow evilly*...

Craig Oxbrow

03-31-2004, 04:49 AM

Since it's you we'll let you off.

Well, not about the pun, obviously.

Craig Oxbrow

03-31-2004, 04:51 AM

Originally posted by Coffee_Lifeform
's easy. Milli's feelings towards people goes something along the lines of "hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, ohhhhhh Jake, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, ZIGGYI'MGONNAKILLYOUaaarrrrGGGHHH!!!, hate, hate, hate, hey William, hate, hate hate..."

She's quite a straightforward girl, is Milli. And yeah - I think her and Charlie should meet, although I don't think Milli would ever resort to using...

...hmmm...*eyes narrow evilly*...
I mean worry in the "is she about to kick my brain through my skull?" way.

And the narrowing eyes evilly makes me nervous also.

*backs away from monitor*

Ha! Made your postcount hit double figures!

Joe Dizzy

03-31-2004, 04:51 AM

Originally posted by Craig Oxbrow
Ziggy: Look, I went to this lecture, and this guy next to me Claude told me this story and you have to be like the 'ippopotamooz!

Cause it's a... reference and stuff.

Joe Nitpick

Craig Oxbrow

03-31-2004, 04:53 AM

*throws things*

Damn you, Pedantor!

sasori

03-31-2004, 06:23 AM

Originally posted by Coffee_Lifeform
's easy. Milli's feelings towards people goes something along the lines of "hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, ohhhhhh Jake, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, ZIGGYI'MGONNAKILLYOUaaarrrrGGGHHH!!!, hate, hate, hate, hey William, hate, hate hate..."

Hmmm, she really is a cute'n'cuddly little ball of fun! :p

She's quite a straightforward girl, is Milli. And yeah - I think her and Charlie should meet, although I don't think Milli would ever resort to using...

...hmmm...*eyes narrow evilly*...

Using what???

Must go read more...

Craig Oxbrow

04-02-2004, 04:51 PM

The Watch House 2.6: Cry Wolf

Milli: punkette Watcher trainee trying to face rejection
Ziggy: refugee of magical conflict, genuinely concerned about Milli
Jake: psychic civilian wondering how Milli feels about him
Andy: quiet unassuming hereditary lycanthrope, in control, oh yeah, you betcha

Sunita: you'll see.

(Absentee)
William: Mister Watcher Trainee, in full-on NPC mode again
Jack: rugby-playing civilian, fallen in with the Watch and out with the squad

(NPC)
Escher: gloomier than usual Watchers' trainer
Emma: Jake's sarky spellcasting Scottish SO
Liz: Andy's enthusiastic younger sister, staying after running away from home
Skel: Professional sorcerer and torturer sent to bring Ziggy back alive
Margot: you'll see.

Previously on The Watch House:

Liz being introduced to the group.

Liz: Y'know. I needed some time out. We're just territorial. Uh, people are. I mean.
Milli: Is this the... family problem?

Cut to Andy hulking out and smashing through a door, howling at the moon.

Liz: Kind of. Not all of it, but that's kinda part of every argument at home isn't it?
Andy: Yeah...
Milli: So you're...
Liz: No. Well, not yet. But I don't want to jinx things.

Roger Wyndham-Pryce talking down to Escher.

Wyndham-Pryce: Well. This was quite the, ah... quite the visit. Having one of your charges abducted and nearly killed, another crying in your arms... Perhaps see about having a teaching assistant assigned.

Escher nods slightly, looking at the floor as Wyndham-Pryce goes. As the door closes, his look darkens into a scowl...

Milli at home, looking miserable, taking his anger out on a tree, and picking up her bag looking less miserable.

--

The Watch House 2.6: Cry Wolf

We open on a montage of quick shots of Cambridge in spring sunshine to the tune of No Doubt's Just A Girl.

We cut to Milli heading through the King's history department, still with her bag over her shoulder but with much more of a spring in her step, smiling to the people she passes, and quietly going "doo doo da da dum..." in time with the music. Her mumbled song peters out as she sees Mister Escher heading towards his office, glowering as two young women follow him inside.

Milli: (quietly) He spends so much time glowering...

These are Sunita Chadha (Parminder Nagra (http://pohotovost.webz.cz/stars/parminder_nagra.jpg)) and Lady Margaret Blashford-Schnell, aka Margot (Sally Phillips (http://www.bbc.co.uk/drama/rescueme/images/mag_promo.jpg)). A study in contrasts, Sunita wears a conservative dark suit with a knee-length skirt and sensible shoes while Margot wears a sheepskin coat and Lennon glasses.

Milli: Hi...?

Escher loses his gloom for a bit of a smile and some poorly masked fatherly concern. Sunita studies Milli and Margot smiles cheerily.

Escher: Ah, good to have you back. Feeling better, I hope...?

Milli nods and returns the smiles and the suspicious glance...

Escher: Everyone else apart from Emma and Jack, and... including Liz, is already inside.
Milli: Liz is still around?

Escher: Everyone... Sunita Chadha, Churchill College Cambridge, and Lady Margaret Blashford-Schnell, King's College London.
Margot: Call me Margot.
Sunita: You can call me Miss Chadha.
Ziggy: (quietly to Jake) a nine and an eight point five... (then to Milli with a grin) Ey, Milli!
Escher: (sigh) The Council has seen fit to assign them as my teaching assistants for the time being.
Ziggy: You're a teacher?
Jake: Maybe that's why he needs the assistance.

Escher gives them a stern look. William and Milli join in.

Sunita: Wit. Charming.
Jake: Strict.
Ziggy: Yeeeaahhh...
Milli: Do I have to separate you two?

Milli: Where's Jack?
Emma: Jack has been making himself scarce this week. He mumbled an apology to Ziggy's shoes when he got out and we haven't really seen him since.
Jake: What did he do to your shoes?
Ziggy: (deadpan) I don't know, he mumbled it.

Margot: Now, ah, hi, we're here to help out with some of the practical elements of your tutelage. Ah, hi.
Milli: What practical elements?
Ziggy: P.E.?
Jake: (smirking) You here to teach us new tricks?
Milli: Zip it...

Sunita: Well, for one, we want to ensure that valuable samples for dissection aren't burned out of hand.
Escher: It was something of an emergency.
Milli: Ah, yes. And we find that things that aren't properly disposed of can come back.
Sunita: Even so, we do require properly labelled samples.
Milli: Oh... I might still have some goo on my sword. Would that help? (smiles brightly)
Sunita: Possibly, Miss Blackhurst.
Andy: And I have some on my shirt.
Milli: And your jeans. (grins)
Andy: This is a different outfit.
Milli: And your hair's a bit...
Andy: Rrrr...
Milli: Oh, hey, when's full moon?
Liz: (quietly) Tonight...

Milli glances across at Liz curiously. Liz looks away...

CREDITS!

Craig Oxbrow

04-02-2004, 04:57 PM

Sunita and Margot continue to poke around the office.

Sunita: The Council are concerned about your level of preparation.
Margot: Wow, a genuine first edition of the Book Of The Black Sun, with the notes on binding Kathnarr Demons! That's really... (off everyone's looks) erm, interesting... (looks down)
Milli: So, you're all for taking samples.
Sunita: Yes.
Milli: That's good. Samples. Good. Er... and how long are you going to be assisting Mister Escher?
Sunita: As long as the Council feels is required.
Jake: Lots of new tricks... (rather less smirky now)
Milli: We should be heading to our lectures... now... if you have any more questions?
Ziggy: So are you his personal assistants?

Margot and Sunita look at each other. Margot half smiles. Sunita looks flustered and takes more notes.

Sunita: I'm sure I don't know what you mean, Mister...
Ziggy: I'm Jake. He's Ziggy.
Sunita: That doesn't match our files...
Jake: William probably wrote it. He's no good with papers.
William: *whimper*
Sunita: Er... I see. For someone with no surname you have quite a record, "Jake". (looking at Jake)

Milli: (nervously) So, ah, part of your brief is going to be disciplinary?
Ziggy: (grins) Al-right...
Milli: Forget I said anything. Good luck with your duties.

Sunita goes purple, lowers her head, counts down from ten...

Sunita: Er... do you not have lectures?
Ziggy: Nah, not till two.
Milli: So, Mister Escher, is anything... happening?
Ziggy: What's da word on da street?
Escher: Things have been quiet lately. With a few exceptions.
Ziggy: Right. I'll... turn down my boombox!
Milli: And your voice?
Ziggy: Nah! So, pub?
Jake: It's... (looks at Sunita and Margot) too early for me. I thought I might head down to the gym.
Ziggy: Why? Have you been hanging around with Jack?
Jake: What, you think Jack goes to the gym?
Ziggy: Nah, just the showers.

Milli: Anyway, you all have things to do. You too.
Jake: Milli wants a girl to girl talk.
Ziggy: I was thinking of taking out a book. Mister Escher...

Jake grabs Ziggy and pulls him towards the door.

Milli: No reading books for you.
Sunita: Er, why?
Ziggy: I just wanted a copy of Catcher In The Rye...
Jake: That kinda book isn't in this library. Come on.

And thus, our heroes beat a hasty retreat to the safer confines of the pub. Sunita clicks her pen back into action...

At the Brody, Milli rather pointedly just gets a coffee.

Milli: I can't believe you said that stuff! Do you have any idea what kind of trouble we're in?
Ziggy: TAs. How much trouble can TAs be?
Milli: These aren't just teaching assistants. They were sent by the Watchers. Y'know, to spy on us?
Ziggy: Ohhhh... You think they know my middle name?
Milli: Yeah. Margot told me.
Liz: What is it?
Milli: Not telling you.
Liz: Aw...
Ziggy: Why so stressed out?
Milli: If you don't know I really can't explain it.
Ziggy: It's an authority thing.
Jake: (smirking) Ooh, yeah.
Milli: (muttering) Where's Emma?
Liz: There she is.

Jake shuts up.

Milli: (loudly) Emma! Great to see you! We've missed you!
Emma: Aw, I missed you too! Welcome back!

And she gives Milli a hug. Since Mil was mostly using that line to get Jake to shut up, she looks rather awkward and pats Em lightly on the back.

Milli: Now hug Ziggy.

Emma smirks and pats Zig on the shoulder.

Milli: See? Likes me more than you.
Ziggy: You find that funny?
Milli: Yeah...?
Ziggy: I find it... interesting.
Emma: "And then I shut up. Dude."
Milli: Yeah, shut up. Dude.

Emma: So, what's going on?
Milli: Oh, the Council sent a pair of teaching assistants and the boys here were -

Sunita: - horribly disrespectful. I must protest!

Jump cut to Escher raising his hands for calm as Sunita jabs the air with an accusing finger.

Margot: They were a bit, well, rude.
Escher: I admit that this was hardly their best behaviour but do you want them -

Ziggy: To lie?
Milli: You could at least pretend to respect them for a while.
Ziggy: I don't lie that well.
Emma: Yes, because you've been so honest with us.
Ziggy: That's being selective with the truth, not lying per se.
Milli: Look, we need to get through this and make a good impression.
Ziggy: You wanna be a TA.
Milli: No I don't.
Ziggy: Oh, you so wanna be a TA.
Milli: I so don't.
Ziggy: No, Miss Blackhurst. Of course not, Miss Blackhurst.
Jake: You see her in a suit?
Ziggy: Definitely. Very businesslike. And holding one of those little pointers.
Milli: No!
Ziggy: And calling us "class"...
Milli: No way!
Ziggy: Well, you sure kissed a lot of butt.
Milli: I prefer to think of it as lying for the good of the Watch...

Emma: So why did the Watchers send teaching assistants?
Jake: We messed up the inspection.
Milli: The secret surprise inspection.
Jake: Which you (Ziggy) didn't know about but still managed to wear a suit for.
Milli: Yeah... What was up with that?
Emma: Not sure you want to be drawing attention to what people were wearing then.
Milli: Oh yeah, I seem to recall I was wearing a sexy schoolgirl outfit.

William looks intently at the bottom of his pint.

Emma: Oh, so now it's okay to talk about it?
Milli: Well, to joke about it.
Ziggy: And about the TA's crisp little suit?
Emma: Huh?
Ziggy: Jake's been a naughty boy.
Milli: He was impressed by her... credentials.
Ziggy: By which I think she means... boobies.
Jake: Shut up!
Ziggy: What, more of a leg man? (off the girls' looks) What? We're having a serious man-to-man talk...
Milli: You don't usually do that in front of us. Em, you should turn them into toads.
Jake: Smaller toads...

Instead, Emma opts to kick Zig under the table.

Ziggy: Ow! Pain! The painful kind!
Milli: I find most pain is the painful kind.
Jake: Mmm...
Emma: Huh?
Jake: What? Oh. I've had a bad night. Maybe I should go back to bed.
William: Good idea. Be fresh for patrolling tonight.
Milli: Oh God, you think they'll wanna patrol with us?
Jake: To keep an eye on us...
Milli: Stopping us doing what we gotta do...
Ziggy: Maybe wearing something black...
Milli: Y'know I'm actually getting bored of kicking you. Maybe I should start kicking someone else.
Emma: Bags not me.
Milli: You're safe, you're a girl.
Ziggy: Girls get hair pulled... cat fights... (dreamily) Mmm...
Jake: (acting affronted) Dude...
Emma: Shut up!
Jake: I had a totally different expression to Ziggy.

Emma narrows her eyes. The booth quietens.

Milli: So... teaching assistants. We need to get rid of them.
Ziggy: Murder? That's a little harsh.
Milli: Uh, no, not where I was going.
Jake: The best way is to be model students.
Milli: It would be, but I have you two guys to deal with.
Jake: Hey, I'm not officially a Watcher in training.
Milli: You were officially an annoyance.

Jake looks at the constantly interesting lampshade.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

04-02-2004, 04:59 PM

Ziggy: And I was just here for the free booze.
Milli: Yeah, where is Jack and why isn't he buying our drinks?
Andy: I can't afford to buy drinks.
Milli: Oh, mine's just a coffee anyway.
Andy: I said can't.
William: A coffee. Right.

And up he gets to get one.

Ziggy: So, J, how's the band?
Jake: Doesn't exist at the moment. And I haven't been writing anything either. I mean, I'd write about what I know, but all these demons and murders it'd all go a bit too Goth...

Ziggy: Okay. TAs. We need to find out why they're here. And stop them.
Milli: That's a surprisingly good plan.
Andy: We get into their office and... ruin their files by setting off their sprinklers!
Milli: And that's an unsurprisingly stupid one.
Ziggy: Okay, you're our Plan C man.
Milli: What's Plan B? Let Jack loose on them and scare them off?
Ziggy: William can look things up. We can tell him... Jake had a vision that made us suspicious.
Milli: Hmm...
Ziggy: Better. You can tell him.
Milli: I can't lie to William! Don't make me lie to him...
Ziggy: You won't be lying. I mean, Jake... you've had a vision. At some point.
Jake: Yeah...
Ziggy: Or at least a dream.
Jake: Yeah. And there are many ways of interpreting dreams.
Ziggy: Or, we can try and get on with them.
Milli: That'll be a neat trick after that first impression.
Ziggy: What? They looked fine from where we were sitting. With the boobies and the asses and all.
Jake: I didn't notice...

Emma glares.

Milli: Fun for all of us there.
Ziggy: More us and Emma.
Jake: More you and Emma. I wasn't involved.
Milli: And that's how you'll remember it, Em?
Emma: Oh yeah.

Ziggy: So anyway, getting on with them. Find some common ground. I'm sure they have senses of humour.
Milli: Yeah, I'm sure they're having a laugh about your attitude being incredibly disrespectful.
Ziggy: Eh. No more than I am to most people. I mean, I don't know them from Bob the homeless guy.
Milli: Hey, Bob's sound. He gets the Big Issue the day it comes out.
Ziggy: No, that's Robert. Bob's the one with the colon problem who hangs out with Jerry who talks to himself.
Milli: Uh... really? How do you know so much about this?
Ziggy: I don't have any lectures till two. I mean, I could go to the library, but where's the fun in that?

Milli: Anyway, this is getting us nowhere with the problem.
Ziggy: Well, I don't wanna play model student.
Milli: You couldn't be anyway.
Ziggy: But it's not like I kick people...
Milli: Hey...
Ziggy: I'm unwilling to kick you. You're unable to go a day without kicking me.
Milli: You keep doing things to make me.
Ziggy: Nothing warrants hurting another human being...
Jake: What about Skel?

Ziggy grimaces and looks away...

Milli: So. What are we going to... do about... them...
Sunita: Hello again. May I join you?
Milli: Uh... sure.
Sunita: I feel we got off on rather the wrong foot today.
Milli: Well, it might help if you just ignore everything they (Jake and Ziggy) said...
Sunita: Right. Hmm.
Emma: Uh, hi, I'm...
Sunita: Emma, yes. Hello.
Emma: Um. Right. (looks nervous)
Sunita: Anyway. This is rather an unusual assignment for me. Most of my work is in the lab.
Ziggy: Oh. Right. Good job.
Milli: Well, the thing is...
Ziggy: Our personalities form a coherent group structure...

Milli looks askance at Ziggy...

Sunita: Really. Well, the thing is, I'm not actually here to pass judgement on you. I'm here to assess Mister Escher.

Milli blinks and barely finds her voice.

Milli: How... what, why...?

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

04-02-2004, 05:02 PM

Milli tries not to look or sound scared.

Milli: You're assessing Mister Escher?
Sunita: We're here to look at the entire Prentice structure here, particularly Mister Escher's teaching methods. There's concern about his ability to maintain discipline and study levels.
Ziggy: Could I just point out how we're all still alive...
Milli: We're pretty much being assessed all the time.
Ziggy: Since I got here I've learned to recognise... (counts on his fingers) three demons!
Milli: (kicking Ziggy under the table) And if he can teach Ziggy, the man clearly has a gift...
Sunita: All the same, the Council are concerned that he may be... losing his focus.
Milli: On?
Sunita: Training you for your duties.
Milli: (quickly) No, no, he's very focused! I mean, if you ask me, he doesn't have much of a life...
Ziggy: Well, he does go out quite...
Milli: Shhh!

William returns with coffee, and dithers about whether to sit or not. He finally passes it to Milli and withdraws.

Ziggy: Look, miss. Go to your superiors and tell them if they have a problem they should come down here themselves.
Sunita: That's why they sent us.
Milli: Look...
Sunita: It's just to monitor and report. Not to pass judgement.
Milli: But your reports will be used to judge him. And us...
Ziggy: Fine. I don't think anything we do can convince them of anything bad.

Everyone tries to look convinced and cool about things.

Ziggy: I mean, granted, we are very... unique group, with a very unique approach.
Milli: And we have a kind of... delicate balance of abilities.
Sunita: Yes. You are quite the team. Although our files aren't clear on what Mister Roots brings...
Ziggy: I bring the donuts.

Ziggy grins... then looks slightly nervous as Sunita fails to smile.

Ziggy: Uh, yeah, they fight the fight and I help out.
Sunita: Could you explain what your contribution is?
Ziggy: Stress relief.
Milli: He's kind of... uh... like... um... a group leader... um... for...
Sunita: Stress relief?
Jake: Punchbag.
Ziggy: Nah, that Jack's job.
Sunita: So what then?
Ziggy: The best way to put it is that I try and keep a balance of Watching and normal college lives. I think that's very important.
Sunita: Hmm... You find your duties excessively stressful?
Milli: Ah, no! But, uh, you should definitely come to the pub -
Jake: Patrol! We're patrolling!
Milli: Yes! Then to the pub. To unwind. Because it's not stressful but it's good to... unwind...
Sunita: See you in the field? Yes, alright. We were going to suggest that anyway.
Milli: Then have a drink or two, get to know us a little better...

Milli tries to look encouraging.

Ziggy: I find it helps to keep everyone clear on what we accomplished.

Milli stops looking encouraging and looks confused instead.

Sunita: Ah, a debriefing, as it were! Very good.
Ziggy: Uh... yes! Just that!
Sunita: So it's been a while since I patrolled. What should I bring?
Milli: Oh, don't worry, we rarely have real trouble. Just wear something black, and easy to move in.
Ziggy: No high heels.
Jake: Don't leave your hair down, It can get tangled in the crossbows.
Milli: No, no, leave it down. You won't need a weapon.
Sunita: Oh, well, I have weapons.
Milli: Of course you do.
Jake: Anyway, just meet us at the office around dusk.

Sunita nods, smiles politely, and departs...

Jake: Group leader? What'd you say that for?!
Milli: I couldn't think of anything else to say!
Emma: And stress relief?
Ziggy: What could I say?
Jake: You kissed so much ass.
Milli: And said you were really important.
Ziggy: I think I described my role quite well actually.
Milli: Oh, what did you say?
Ziggy: (pause, then deadpan) Nothing important...
Milli: And now you're getting huffy about it...
Jake: Being the model student...
Milli: Yeah, you were... why?
Ziggy: It was your idea!

Ziggy clumps off to the bar. Milli follows.

Milli: Know that time we were in Mister Escher's office... cataloguing books? Have you been... cataloguing books with someone else?
(At this point I collapse giggling. Take a Drama Point.)
Ziggy: I don't know what you mean.
Milli: I mean you're acting weird again.
Ziggy: Yes, you caught me. I'm really Britney Spears.
Milli: That would explain what you made me wear. But I think she'd choose a nicer shirt. (nods to Sunita)
Ziggy: (to Tessa at the bar) Can I get a glass of water? Thank you...

And he throws the contents at Milli. She dodges, but her hair gets caught in the swing.

Milli: What the bloody hell -
Ziggy: You need to cool down.
Milli: Tessa, can I get a glass... actually, can I get the soda gun?
Tessa: Uh, um, uh, um...

Ziggy retreats into cover. Tessa hands Mil a hand towel with an apologetic expression.

Jake: So what's the deal with the Council and Escher? He hasn't been around as much lately, has he?
Milli: (returning) Maybe because some of us are adults and don't need constant supervision.
Ziggy: I don't think we need to look for an ulterior motive beyond someone not liking how he's running things.
Milli: What, you swallow a dictionary there?
Ziggy: Oh, I'm sorry. (deadpan) Boobies, boobies, titties, let's get drunk.
Milli: Ho ho.
Emma: Maybe it's just that the Council think we're idiots?
Milli: Our success rate's pretty much a hundred per cent. Although some of us (glares at Ziggy) clearly are idiots.
Ziggy: I do what I do because I care.
Milli: That my hair's not wet enough?
Ziggy: The wet look's in this season.
Milli: And I follow fashion all the time...
Ziggy: Yeah, you could do with a makeover.

Emma saves Milli the trouble and kicks Ziggy under the table.

Andy: (returning) So this report they got, it was by this Wyndham-Pryce guy?
Milli: He was a pain.
Emma: But we saved his life.
Milli: I meant his father. But I suppose they're both just as bad.
Ziggy: They're both kinda... asshats. You think that the old guy put in the negative report?
Milli: Yeah.
Jake: Our best and brightest. (smirks)
Ziggy: Well, whatever Miss Chicklet said wasn't really that useful...
Milli: Miss Chicklet? That's really not nice.

Ziggy reaches for a glass of water... Milli glares...

Ziggy: Lectures!
Andy: Er, possibly?
Emma: Not the whole answer we need.
Ziggy: We need to find out what the Watchers really want. Compare training and plans.

Milli blinks and nods slightly.

Milli: Should we talk to Mister Escher about this?
Ziggy: We could...
Milli: I mean, I think he's focusing perfectly.
Emma: And he thinks you're great too...
Ziggy: Anyway. If this goes badly, he gets shifted?
Milli: (quietly) Yeah.
Ziggy: And we get someone more on top of us all the time.
Milli: On top of us and stopping us doing our jobs.
Jake: Well, yeah, but aren't you training? So it's not your job.
Milli: Well, no, but it's what we have to do.
Ziggy: Not what I have to do. And if we get some new guy like asshat in charge, I'm gone.
Milli: You'd just quit?

Ziggy starts to say "no" but stops himself.

Ziggy: Look, say you're a normal student.
Milli: Okay...
Ziggy: You pick a subject...
Milli: Yeah.
Ziggy: You study...
Milli: Yeah.
Ziggy: You lose interest...
Milli: No... I mean, yeah. Normal student...
Ziggy: I'm like that. I can't be dealing with this stuff...

Milli heads off to find William. He's in the office, hiding in a book.

Milli: Okay, we need to know what the Watchers want.
William: I agree.
Milli: So we need to know what rules and guidelines we're breaking.
William: Hmm. I don't know about breaking, I think we more... interpret liberally...

Jake and Ziggy come in soon after.

Jake: We need to know where they're staying too.
William: Uh, why?
Escher: Yes, why?
Jake: Ah, uh, we arranged to go patrolling with them, but we forgot to say where to meet up... We're blockheads like that... But we forgot all about it. Uh, she was nervous. Sort of a bookish lab bench type.
Ziggy: All over that, eh?
Escher: (on phone) Yes, hello, you're patrolling... here at sunset. I see. See you then.
Jake: Oh, we did. (backpedalling) That was useful. Maybe we're not such blockheads.
Escher: Quite. I realise you're all concerned...
Ziggy: That they're on your ass.

Escher nods slightly, unsurprised.

Ziggy: So you know. What'll happen? Will you be promoted, demoted... emoted?
Escher: That depends on their findings.
Milli: But...
Jake: What's the worry about? Slayage, Watchage... haircuts? I mean, the first two, I don't think we have a problem.
Escher: Yes, well, it's hardly your decision, is it?

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

04-02-2004, 05:04 PM

Andy turns up, with Liz trailing behind looking less cheerful than usual.

Andy: So, what have we found out?
William: I'm looking at the Prentice code of standards...
Andy: Which are probably a hundred years old. Times change...
Escher: But the Council places great weight upon tradition. And upon standards of knowledge. They think my methods are lax.
Milli: No...
Escher: Well... this is a...

And he opens an illustrated book of demon types and points to a drawing.

Ziggy: A... demon.
Jake: This is... a book full of demons?
Milli: I'm pretty sure it starts with an S...
William: It's a Shegurim.
Milli: See, I was right... kinda...

Escher pointedly closes the book.

Milli: So we suck, basically.
Escher: No, no but...
Jake: Being first year students who don't know what's in every one of these books?

Ziggy picks up and opens a newspaper.

Ziggy: So what is this?
Escher: It's an advertisement for sofas.
Ziggy: And it's not a ten-page obituary section. You know why, because we take care of whatever's out there.
Andy: This is war. There are no tests in war.
Milli: Exactly.
Escher: Maybe I should pack a bag.

And he slumps into his chair.

Ziggy: We're here to fight them, not to study them.
William: Well, uh...
Milli: Actually that's supposed to be the Slayer's job and we're doing it...
Escher: The Council believes, very firmly, that knowledge is power. Forewarned is forearmed. And clearly they feel that I have failed in this aspect of your instruction... and they may be right...

Ziggy: He's giving up.
Milli: There's only so much he can do.
Jake: Because he doesn't conform to their standards.
Milli: Because we don't conform.
Andy: But we've learned so much, we have all this experience!
Milli: For something we can't do!
Andy: Huh?
Milli: They don't want fighters, they want Watchers. They want people who can tell the Slayer how to fight. I've trained with Slayers... well, potential Slayers... but they need people who can tell them that you stab a Rashnakh Demon in the eyes and ears to kill it or... whatever you do to a Shegurim to kill it, and we don't know that!
William: (quietly) You cut off its head and burn the stump. Uh, sorry. Stepped on your point...
Ziggy: We can't all be William.
Milli: But that's what they want.
Ziggy: Well, we can't do that.
Milli: I didn't decide this...
Escher: No, you didn't. And you're right. That is exactly what the Council wants.

He stands up and straightens his posture as everyone looks back to him.

Escher: I have long felt that they place too much emphasis on one branch of study. I know what a nightmare it can be trying to learn all of this... there's a reason I still have to look these things up. The Council want perfection. They want the impossible. But that's only their official position - they can't sack an Invigilator for failing to deliver perfection. Unless they want him out for another reason.
Milli: Yeah...
Andy: So if they get rid of you, what then? We carry on the fight, right?
William: We can still find what to do here...
Milli: If they get rid of him, we lose access to all these books.
Jake: And we get Mister Wyndham-Pryce or someone telling us what to do.
Ziggy: The old one or the new one?
Milli: Does it matter?
Ziggy: No. So those are our options. We can sit around and mope or we can do our jobs.
Milli: I'm not moping.
Ziggy: He's moping. (looking at Escher)
Escher: Ahem. If this is a political manoeuvre, there's very little we can do. If this is a routine follow-up to a bad report, there's very little we need to do...

Then the door opens and Sunita enters all decked out in black, with a pistol crossbow in hand.

Escher: (deadpan) Either way, let's not assume they're assassins just yet.
Sunita: (brightly) Ready to go?

Everyone turns and half of them manage reassuring nods.

Milli: Sure thing... (turns back to Escher, concerned) We'll talk soon.
Escher: Of course.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

04-02-2004, 05:07 PM

Sunita has elected to go patrolling in a zipped-up leather jacket and tight trousers. Jake can't avoid looking.

Milli: You have a girlfriend. Remember?
Jake: I was ju... wasn't looking.

Ziggy: Crisp?
Sunita: Won't the noise give away our positions?
Milli: We find the smell lures demons.
Sunita: Ah. Good thinking. Mister Roots, are you carrying an unconcealed crossbow?
Ziggy: Who, me? (hides half of his crossbow inside his jacket)

Jake picks up his guitar bag.

Milli: Bringing your guitar?
Jake: Uh, no, weapons...
Milli: Why? (pause) Oh, right.

Sunita: So, what kind of circuit do you patrol?
Ziggy: We walk till we're tired?
Milli: Haha, good one Ziggy. (glares at him behind Sunita's back)
Jake: We vary our pattern, so as not to be predictable. And we cover the whole town in about a week. William arranges all that.
Milli: And the rota.
William: (quickly) I don't do everything! Everybody helps!
Milli: Yes! Yes we do! (big grin)
Jake: (quietly) Wish I'd stayed back with Emma...

Jump cut to Emma, muttering:

Emma: Wish I'd gone patrolling.
Margot: So, this magical warding barrier you made, you reverse-engineered it from the spell to rescind invitations to vampires, using mandrake instead of garlic? That's really clever.
Emma: Er, thanks... Of course, we haven't actually tested it yet.
Margot: Oh. Right. Well, I'm sure everything will work out.

Margot smiles affably, and Emma manages a weak and clearly unconvinced smile in return.

William: So, er, what are you studying currently?
Sunita: I've been analysing the makeup of...
Milli: Makeup artists?
Sunita: Demon genetics. Makeup? Do you think we need camouflage?
Milli: Er, no.
Ziggy: Milli made a joke!
Milli: I make a lot of jokes!
Ziggy: And another! That was a joke there, right?
Milli: ... I have lots of weapons.
Ziggy: Jeez, sorry...
Milli: You're very... being different again.
Ziggy: (irritably) Boobies boobies titties. A couple jokes and you think you know me.

Milli frowns, hurt, deepening into a scowl...

Jake: (loudly) So, genetics huh?
Sunita: Oh, yes.
Jake: Interesting!
William: Yes, very!
Jake: (quietly to Milli) We can't distract her from your bickering all night.
Milli: What do you mean?
Jake: You're having another of your "conversations". (air quotes)
Milli: We don't have "conversations". We don't even have conversations without inverted commas. He tells jokes and we don't know him at all...
Ziggy: Hey, I -
Milli: (loudly to Sunita) So how much patrolling have you done?
Sunita: Not very much since my Prentice days actually.
Milli: Right. (without skipping a beat) Do you understand men at all?
Sunita: Er... well, their anatomy and cellular structure... How to take dead ones apart...
Andy: Vampires?
William: Where?
Andy: I mean, taking them apart.
Milli: Yes, because as you can see, this is a quiet patrol. We haven't had to kill anything in ages.
William: Apart from last week.
Ziggy: Are you suffering psychic distress that you haven't hit anything lately?

Milli makes a fist...

Sunita: Is this part of his role as a punchbag?
Jake: I was joking about that.
Sunita: Ah... Really?
Ziggy: Really. And I was doing my job talking about her stress.
Sunita: Oh, terribly sorry.
Ziggy: Anyway, this is the end of our route. So now you have an idea what we do, and how dead boring it is.
Milli: What he means is we've been very efficient in keeping the city safe from monsters.

Everyone except Sunita holds their breath and looks around...

Sunita: So, if we had found something, you would have been ready to collect spoor?
Milli: Spoor... Um...
Jake: We haven't been asked to do that.
Andy: Oh, we got Jack to do it a few times. Told him it's important.
Milli: It is important. (winces)
Ziggy: We'll add spoor detail to the list of education, training, and doing your job.
Sunita: This is part of your education, practising your skills in the field...
Ziggy: Practice? We've killed more vampires than you've had dates.
Milli: Ziggy!
Ziggy: What?
Sunita: Look, you have to be good at the full spectrum of abilities. You can't just pick and choose.
Milli: We know that. But this is a team effort.
Sunita: I appreciate that you prefer a field role, but it is important that your studies are not neglected.
Ziggy: That's why we have -
Milli: Our books.
William: Anyway. I have an early lecture, so I think I'll call it a night.

Ziggy sees William off. Milli and Jake share a look and mouth and sign at each other...

Milli: (mouths) Get her to the pub!
Jake: (mouths) What, are you crazy?
Milli: (mouths, making an "aaarg!" gesture) Jake!
Jake: (sighs) Join us at the pub? The vital winding-down time Ziggy mentioned?
Milli: Ziggy got the idea from Mister Escher. He has a very strong bond to him. Don't tell him we said anything, he'd just brush it off.
Sunita: Really? That doesn't really come across in my reports.
Milli: He hides it very well.
Ziggy: (returning) What happened?
Milli: We're going down to the pub. Coming?
Sunita: I'm sure it will be quite interesting.
Ziggy: ... What happened?

Andy: (quietly, as Sunita leads the way) You have a very deep respect for Mister Escher.
Milli: She likes him.
Ziggy: You think?
Milli: You like her. It's okay...
Ziggy: What? What is going on here?

Putting on jackets and the like to break up the all-black ensembles, our heroes enter the pub. Supergrass proclaiming "see our friends, see the sights, feel alright" seems a tad ironic at the moment.

Sunita: So, drinks?
Ziggy: Iced tea.
Sunita: Lemon or peach?
Ziggy: Who drinks peach?
Andy: I'll have a beer.
Milli: Just a glass of white.
Jake: A pint. Just the one.

Ziggy: Why so quiet?
Milli: Anything I say you threaten to throw water at me. Doesn't matter.
Ziggy: Are we swallowing everything up again so it doesn't get said?
Milli: Yes we are, Mister "I say a few jokes and you don't know me at all".
Sunita: (returning from the bar) Are they always like this?
Jake: Er, they're bonding. Part of debriefing. Fixes the events of the evening in our minds. Mister Escher's idea. The debriefing, not going to the pub...

Mill looks disbelievingly at Zig.

Ziggy: Look, let's not talk about it...
Milli: Why not? I was trying to help!
Ziggy: I appreciate the gesture but I feel somewhat insulted that you take everything I tell you at face value...
Sunita: So, off duty you...
Ziggy: Bicker and fight. Er, it gets tension out.
Jake: I play the guitar.
Milli: (still to Ziggy) So, y'know... doesn't matter. (her head droops)
Sunita: So, er, Milli. What do you do?
Milli: The bickering and fighting. So... what kinda music do you like?

Andy finishes the half he was given (only Jake specified a size) and sneaks out early...

And now that British Summer Time has started, the college cows are back in their enclosure. One of them looks up warily, then backs up as something drops into its stall. A low growl as the figure steps closer. A frantic beating of hooves and a bellow of fear and pain is drowned out by a violent tearing sound, and then a howl echoing over the enclosure, up to the full moon over the King's College Chapel...

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

04-02-2004, 05:09 PM

Andy's up early next morning, looking agitated, studying.

Andy: Damn maths problems...
Milli: (quietly) Watcher stuff, Watcher stuff...

Escher and "assistants" enter.

Sometime during the night one of the college's herd of cattle was killed in an apparent animal attack. Not many details so far, but I've arranged an inspection of the body.

Everyone looks at Andy.

Andy: Uh... Y'know, we haven't seen Jack in a few days. Uh, what?
Jake: Where were you last night?
Andy: I, uh, went to bed after the patrol.
Liz: I went to be early.
Milli: Andy, do you lock yourself in or something...?
Andy: I don't need that. Hey, don't stare at me! I'm in control!

William and Emma lean back in their chairs.

Ziggy: Uh, so, this cow. Eaten? Mangled? Banged?
Escher: The first two.
Ziggy: So we look at all the werewolves we have...
Andy: Hey...
Ziggy: We just have to check your stomach contents.
Andy: But I had a kebab on Tuesday.
Jake: Yeah, well, there'll be no meat content on that.
Andy: Aren't there any other explanations?
Ziggy: Not in this town if this guy (Escher) comes in and talks about it.
Milli: What he's trying to say is we have confidence in Mister Escher's abilities to pinpoint concerns. And besides, we have a number of unique abilities here, that Mister Escher has been helping us to direct and control. Hasn't he Andy?

Andy nods slightly.

Milli: Now, how about we have a quick look at this cow?
Sunita: Good idea. Did you bring your analysis kit?
Milli: (smacks forehead theatrically) Analysis kit! I was going through my bag this morning, thinking I'm sure there's something I'm forgetting...
Jake: Well, I'm sure we can use Miss Chadha's just this once, and rely on Old Faithful next time.
Andy: Right. I'll, uh, stay here.
Jake: Good idea. No looking at carcasses for you.

And so they get ready to go. Ziggy snags Milli.

Ziggy: Why are you BSing?
Milli: I don't want Mister Escher to get fired!
Ziggy: You have no faith in Escher?
Milli: I have no faith in them!
Ziggy: You think they won't figure out that you're faking it?
Milli: I don't think they're all that smart.
Ziggy: We do all we can. And get judged by that.
Milli: It's not good enough for them any more.
Ziggy: I think you're making a pretty big assumption.

Milli blinks, startled.

Milli: What?
Ziggy: That they'll leave you alone if they see what they want.
Milli: When they go we can go back to doing what we do. Or we can let them stick around, make us carry evidence kits and pick up demon crap...
Ziggy: Or they split us up.
Milli: What? Why?
Ziggy: They train single Watchers here. They want one person who can deal with all this stuff. They don't want a team.
Milli: Well... we're screwed then.

She slumps in her seat, looking away. He frowns.

Jake takes Andy aside as the group get ready to go.

Jake: Can you tell... if Liz has changed? I know you have supersenses and all...
Andy: I don't know...

Ziggy: We're doing good... not the way they want, but it's the right thing to do.
Milli: So, do you think we can do it by ourselves?
Ziggy: No. Can't let them split us up. I mean, I'm sure Junior Wyndham-Pryce and three or four mates would do really well fighting the good fight, but on his own?
Milli: Yeah...
Ziggy: Do you want to be the best Watcher they have, or do you want to do something useful?
Milli: We can't do both?
Ziggy: I don't think so.
Milli: But there are a lot of us out there on our own, and in small groups...
Ziggy: So you trust the Council to get this right now?
Milli: (sighs) Can we just agree to disagree here?
Ziggy: Sure. I'm right and you're wrong.
Milli: (to Escher) Can I get a glass of water before we go?

Those that are going, go. Those that are staying, stay. Andy goes to see if Liz has gotten out of bed yet...

Andy: So, did you get much sleep?
Liz: Not really.
Andy: Bad dreams?
Liz: Nothing I can remember...
Andy: Have you had breakfast?
Liz: No, I'm not hungry...
Andy: Um... have you changed?
Liz: I was gonna have a shower first...

Sunita examines the carcass.

Sunita: Now, we pour some plaster into the wound to see the pattern of the teeth.
Ziggy: That's really interzzzzzz...
Milli: He has narcolepsy.

Milli kicks Ziggy and smiles brightly in her "yes, I'm paying attention" way. Zig, meanwhile, gets out his Game Boy. Milli manoeuvres herself between him and Sunita. Jake, meanwhile, finds a long reddish hair on the cow's body and quietly puts it into an evidence bag out of sight...

Meanwhile, Liz twists a long red curl around her finger nervously.

Liz: You think I'm... that I could be...
Andy: Hey, it's okay. Is this why you ran away?
Liz: No! I mean... just about every fight at home is about this... in a way... but...

He puts a comforting arm around her. She shrugs it off.

Liz: I can't... can't deal with this... I can't...
Andy: It'll be okay.
Liz: No it won't!

And with that she runs out of the room...

Jake: (on phone) Go find her. You can smell her, right?... Don't answer that.

He tells the others.

Ziggy: So we find her, and keep an eye on her tonight.
Milli: Like what, we lock her up? You can't just do that to a sixteen-year-old girl. I mean, is this something for her to be ashamed of? It's not her fault.
Ziggy: I'm sure she'll be reasonable.

And cut to Liz running, in tears...

Then to Andy racing out of Escher's house, stopping to look around wildly and sniff the air, then rushing off.

Sunita and the guys return to the office.

Escher: Well?
Sunita: I pulled a few hairs from the body. Unless it was sharing a pen with a highland cow, I'd say the suspect has reddish hair.
Escher: Any idea what the suspect is?
Jake: Well, it's too early to -
Sunita: Definitely a werewolf or a humanoid predator of similar size.
Jake: - say.

Andy picks up a puzzling scent and heads over to the groundsman's shed at the end of the Backs, the area of lawn and park between the colleges and the river Cam. He calls it in...

Andy: Ziggy! What up, dude?
Ziggy: Okay, I'll never say that again.
Andy: I might have found a lead.
Ziggy: That's cool. Over here, we found that the cow was killed by, hey, something big and hairy. Big surprise there I bet...

Andy is about to interrupt him when the door opens behind him and someone clubs him on the back of the head.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

04-02-2004, 05:10 PM

Ziggy: But yeah, we got to use analysis kits. Isn't that thrilling. And now that other one Margot's trying to get Emma to levitate a pencil. And... hey, Andy? Andy? (looks around) Hey guys, Andy's not answering.
Milli: Not answering like he went into a tunnel or like...
Ziggy: I can hear talking in the background.
Milli: People talking in the background. Well, that really narrows it down.
Ziggy: I just figured he's Andy, he only says something every fifteen minutes. But he called me...

The group split up and go to look for him.

Jake and Ziggy soon confirm he isn't at the bar.
William can't see him in lectures.
Milli checks his room... and doesn't spot Liz hiding in the bathroom...

By the time the group get back together, with Escher keeping Sunita and Margot out of their way, it's late afternoon and the sky is turning reddish.

Jake: Okay, we need to find both of them before...
William: The moon rises.

Milli loads a tranquilliser gun with a look of grim determination.

Milli: I think we better use these if we have to.

William takes the next one offered, then Jake... then Ziggy. Milli blinks but hands it over.

And meanwhile, Andy wakes chained to a chair. A thin, auburn-haired man smirks down at him.

Roger: Evenin'.
Andy: Who the hell are you?
Roger: Me? Oh, just a guy who knows what he is. Not like you.
Andy: So, "guy", anything to do with the bump on my head?
Roger: You think they're not scared o' you? You're not human. They know that. Even if yer not a wolf to them, what are you? A sheepdog? And the sheep know the sheepdog's still just a wolf that does what the shepherd tells him.
Andy: Why do this?
Roger: I hate to see a fella denyin' what he is. And I'd really hate it if yer sister ended up like you.
Andy: Hey, what do you know about my sister?
Roger: Heh heh. Such concern...
Andy: Tell me what's goin' on or I'm gonna lay into you right now!
Roger: Ha! That's the spirit!

The man grins... his eyes light up, and every one of his teeth extends...

Spreading out to patrol, the group look up as they hear howls from somewhere in the Backs. Racing that way, they're just in time to see two huge, fur-covered monsters crashing out through the wall of the shed, rolling over and over, slashing and growling at each other.

Milli: Andy... and Liz?

Taking aim, she fires and sinks a dart into the reddish lycanthrope's shoulder. It turns around with a snarl, and Andy punches it. It roars and smashes him across the jaw, flattening him.

Ziggy fires as well, aiming high, and hits the standing monster in the chest. William aims badly and hits the wreckage of the shed.

William: Now Liz, uh... don't do anything crazy now... We're your friends...

And then Andy's phone rings, sticking out of the torn remnants of his jacket. Jake, having circled around, picks it up.

Jake: Hello?
Liz: Are you there? I'm hiding out in your room. And there isn't any toilet paper... What's that noise?
Jake: Uh... hi Liz.

And he looks at the werewolf that just knocked Andy down, stalking towards Milli, William and Ziggy...

Jake: It's Jake... Don't worry... we'll get you some... Bye...

That was Liz. So this isn't Liz. This is an entirely different werewolf that just beat Andy and wants to kill them.

Milli reloads and fires again. Another good shot. But it's still coming.

And then Andy grabs its leg and brings it down, then staggers over, picks it up and throws it headfirst through the still-standing shed wall. Then he sinks to his knees, reverting to human form, and passes out...

Cut to Escher's office, next morning.

Ziggy: So who was this guy? Werewolf rights activist?
Jake: Militant Canine Defence League?
Andy: He was upset that I wouldn't release the inner me.
Milli: I think you did that.
Andy: Oh yeah, that's something I want to - Grarrrr!

Emma hides behind Jake, who looks at Andy warily. William flinches away. Milli grimaces.

Andy: Guess he was right there...

Escher: Roger Simmons.
Ziggy: Simmons? Now there's a scary name...
Escher: Quite a history of arrests, accusations of being a hired thug. Apparently he's some sort of... werewolf mercenary.
Milli: So what are we going to do with him?
Escher: We can ensure he never sees moonlight again.
William: Who would hire him to go after us?

Everyone looks at Ziggy.

Ziggy: What? I wouldn't spend money to buy a werewolf! We have our own!
Milli: Not you. Someone after you?
Ziggy: Oh. Right.

And finally, we cut to Andy and Liz at the train station. She adjusts the strap on her bag, looking away.

Liz: Okay, um, my break's ending. And, I guess if I was a werewolf this would have triggered it. So I guess that's one thing we don't have in common... I'll see ya.
Andy: Hey, it's okay. It's good... well, in a way. It's good for you. Mum and dad'll be happy.
Liz: Yeah. Um. Sorry.

She smiles sadly as he gives her a hug and waves her off...

CREDITS!
GRR! ARG!

Craig Oxbrow

04-02-2004, 05:12 PM

Next time on The Watch House:
Milli pointing at a page in a book.

Milli: It's... I really do know this one but I can't pronounce it!

Margot rolling her eyes.
Escher drawing his sword.
A vampire smirking.
Sunita pointedly loading her pistol crossbow.
Emma clutching her head and screaming in pain.
Ziggy yelling in fury and charging...
Escher V/O: The next episode of The Watch House is Get Me To School On Time.

--

Actual Play bit

Due to a cast party on Saturday night (one of our producers shares a birthday with Alyson Hannigan, and Sophia Myles's onetime flatmate Keira Knightley was also on set as it was her birthday this week as well) we were all, apart from Joe, functioning on four hours' sleep between us. So I managed to miss a fatal structural error. The Werewolf plotline should have run concurrently with the Teaching Assistants plot (in my original notes the cow was killed in the pre-credits) but the players ran with the former for two hours before I kicked the other storyline into motion with an hour to go.

Cat: You're going to say "Credits!" aren't you?
Craig: Nooooo...

This was always going to be half of the episode, it's just a matter of getting the halves together.

The presence of Sunita shifted the group dynamic again. Her player managed to avoid making her really adversarial to the group as a whole, by having her share her concerns over the mission.

Due to the new problem rearing its head (and the aforementioned general air of exhaustion) we didn't get a good look at Milli's new non-miserable demeanour. Sorry Cat.

Next time, a look at the new dynamic and how it affects an apparently straightforward story. I say "apparently" for a reason...

colbabe

04-02-2004, 08:10 PM

Originally posted by Craig Oxbrow
These are Sunita Chadha (Parminder Nagra (http://pohotovost.webz.cz/stars/parminder_nagra.jpg)) and Lady Margaret Blashford-Schnell, aka Margot (Sally Phillips (http://www.bbc.co.uk/drama/rescueme/images/mag_promo.jpg)).

Hooray! Two excellent, classy and wonderful actresses. Good casting choice Mr Oxbrow.

Craig Oxbrow

04-03-2004, 05:13 AM

Much as I like to receive praise, I can't claim credit for Ms. Phillips as Margot. She's a crossover with Resurgam (http://forum.rpg.net/showthread.php?threadid=92871), Mr. Analytical's game of rebuilding the Watchers after Buffy season seven.

On the other hand, Ms. Nagra as Sunita is entirely my responsibility. :D

Craig Oxbrow

04-15-2004, 07:26 PM

The Watch House 2.7: Get Me To School On Time

Milli: punkette Watcher trainee trying to face rejection
Ziggy: refugee of magical conflict, genuinely concerned about Milli
Jake: psychic civilian wondering how Milli feels about him
Andy: quiet unassuming hereditary lycanthrope, in control, oh yeah, you betcha
Sunita: Watchers' Council very proper teaching assistant

(Absentee)
William: Mister Watcher Trainee, in full-on NPC mode again
Jack: rugby-playing civilian, fallen in with the Watch and out with the squad

(NPC)
Escher: gloomier than usual Watchers' trainer
Emma: Jake's sarky spellcasting Scottish SO
Margot: Watchers' Council fairly slapdash teaching assistant
Skel: Professional sorcerer and torturer sent to bring Ziggy back alive
Mac: Skel's main henchman

Previously on The Watch House:

Escher introducing Sunita and Margot to the group.

Skel cracks his knuckles, flexes his fingers... and lightning arcs between them.

"Ziggy": So who are you working for?
Skel: Oh, yer hopin' I ain't still workin' for the ol' man, eh? Sorry ta disappoint ya. Although it'd actually be worse for ya if I wasn't. 'E wants you alive.

Skel smirking as "Milli" attacks him, wearing a School Disco outfit.

Skel: What do you look like?
"Milli": AAAAGH!

And "she" charges, daggers flailing. They bounce off a forcefield surrounding Skel...

And Skel teleporting out when he feels threatened...

Craig Oxbrow

04-15-2004, 07:29 PM

We open in Escher's office, with Milli squinting as Margot points at a page in a book.

Milli: It's a Lesser... I really do know this one but I can't pronounce it!
Margot: Anyone?
Ziggy: A Bummereth Demon?
Andy: Is that really just one demon?
Margot: Well, there's a closeup of its serrated claws...
Andy: It'd be cool having claws that big...
Ziggy: Problems with your size?
Milli: I have this problem with pronunciation.
Ziggy: Especially when drinking.
Milli: Is this even pronounceable by humans anyway?
Ziggy: Like Spock's first name?... I did not just say that.

Margot rolls her eyes.

Margot: This is a Lesser Sumerian Nok'Chorra. Nok Chorr-ah., and can be killed by... anyone?
Milli: Severing the spinal cord.
Margot: (brightly) Yes! At least some of this sticks. Now, who wants a scone?
Andy: Ooh, ooh, me! Is there jam?
Margot: Of course.
Milli: I should get a gold star.
Ziggy: You guessed.
Milli: I know it. In fact, I think I've fought one.
Ziggy: Uh-huh.
Milli: Uh-huh.
Ziggy: That's the way -
Milli: You're crazy.
Ziggy: Of course. Think my hair's naturally this curly?
Sunita: Are you going to eat the scone or not?
Milli: Why...?
Ziggy: It's Pavlovian conditioning.
Milli: It's a scone, not a pavlova.

She hands her scone to Andy, who eats it in one go.

Andy: (defensively) It's alright for a werewolf to like scones...
William: Yes... it's alright...
Milli: Anyway... I have a lecture. And even if I don't, I still do.

Escher: It's been reasonably quiet the last few days, but I imagine you want to patrol tonight.
Sunita: Yes, definitely. In the meantime, we could go over some demon identifications.
Milli: I have a lecture.
Ziggy: But you're not doing so well.
Milli: Better than you. If there's extra study going.
Ziggy: Where's that glass of water?

Escher hands a glass to Milli. She flicks a bit at Ziggy.

Sunita: Well, anyway. Be prepared. If the group's going out tonight, it's a good chance to see them in action.

And cut to the group sitting around, Emma checking her watch...

Emma: You think maybe the forces of evil missed the memo?
Milli: Doobie dum bum bum...
Sunita: I'm thinking of making cards for the most common demon types. Possibly a flowchart. "Red eyes, yes/no..."

Milli shakes her head and goes off to practice kicks on a tree. Ziggy curses his GameBoy.

Milli: Did Pikachu hurt you, make you cry?
Ziggy: I'm not talking to you.
Milli: Yay! So...
Ziggy: Yeah?
Milli: See? Speaking to me.
Ziggy: So?
Milli: Ha!
Ziggy: She's being twelve. Why is she being twelve?
Milli: Because I'm bored! Nothing's happening...

And we pull back to reveal a vampire smirking. He sneaks out of earshot and pulls out a mobile phone.

Smirky Vampire: Yes sir, they're off patrolling... kinda bored, really... Kill 'em all? Right you are.

And with that he shuts off his phone and snaps his fingers, and three more vampires step out of the shadows...

CREDITS!

Craig Oxbrow

04-15-2004, 07:32 PM

Sunita: So, Mister Roots... may I call you Ziggy? No lectures until two? So would your morning be free?
Ziggy: Not as such, I'm researching.
Sunita: A bit of demon research?
Ziggy: Researching popular culture.
Sunita: Really? Because demon identification is one of your weaker areas...

Then the vampires charge.

Ziggy: Oh, thank Clapton!
Sunita: Oh my. Vampires. Unrestrained vampires...

Ziggy: Okay, everybody guard the TA...
Milli: She has Watcher training.
Ziggy: So, useless.
Milli: Hey!
Ziggy: It's not you, just generally...

Milli scowls and kills a charging vamp with a crossbow bolt, as Jake draws a bead on another and Andy jabs at a third with a stake.

Jake fires a bolt into a vampire's head. The vamp gurgles and tugs at it.

Milli: Um, the heart?
Jake: Means more time writing reports.

Sunita backs away, struggling with her pistol crossbow.

Ziggy: What I say? Watcher...

Milli answers Jake and Ziggy's points with another bolt through the struggling vamp's face.

Sunita: That's, ah, good dispersal...

Sunita gives up on the crossbow and goes for the stake.

Milli: Are you sure you want to get that close?
Sunita: I'm much more... jabby.

She promptly nails a vamp right in the jacket pocket. Sighing, she pulls out a dagger.

Ziggy: Remember what I said about inability and unwillingness?

Jake draws his sword. Milli steps back.

Milli: We're never the rearguard, you know? We could sit this one out.
Jake: Hey, Ziggy, you're dropping your arm.
William: What the hell are you two doing?

Milli aims at the one charging Ziggy, because she really can't sit this kind of thing out. Just then, Andy shoulder-barges it into a tree branch.

Smirky Vampire: Bugger this for a lark!

The remaining vamp turns and runs. Twang, Thud, Whoomph.

Sunita retrieves her discarded weapons.

Ziggy: And why again do we want to be Watchers?
Sunita: Been a little while.
Jake: You did fine... uh... very scientific going through the weapons there.
Margot: Now, I believe you go to the pub yes?
Jake: Well, it doesn't have to be.
Milli: After patrolling, places like the libraries and coffee shops aren't generally open.
Andy: And they don't serve pints!
Milli: We don't go there to drink pints. We. Go. There. To. Unwind.

Sunita: That was quite exciting. I haven't seen a vampire loose in quite a while.
Ziggy: Was it as good for you as it was for us?
Sunita: Oh, yes, abso... oh.

Sunita goes red as she stops to gather some vampire dust.

Jake: Can you tell much from dust?
Sunita: You can determine their approximate age. A tissue sample gives a more accurate reading, of course.
Emma: Of course...
Margot: There's a lot of spinning of test tubes involved.
Ziggy: Fascinating.
Andy: Is it really bad to get blood on vampire dust?
Sunita: No. There's only one recorded case of a vampire returning after turning to dust and that was all due to magic.
Margot: Where did you hear that?
Andy: From, uh, Christopher Lee. Of course, if you believe that, you'll believe you can become a werewolf by being bitten.
Sunita: Er... um...
Margot: Well...
Ziggy: Well, time to pat ourselves on the back, have a drink or two, and go to bed.
Sunita: Of course, early lectures. And we have that cramming session in the morning.
Ziggy: We do?

On the way to the pub:

Jake: So, you and Miss Chicklet have an early morning tête-à-tête?
Emma: Yeah...
Ziggy: She just went to work on flowcharts. It's not gonna be wild and crazy.
Jake: So have the regular meeting about four, give you plenty of time?
Milli: Good idea. (takes out her phone) Hi, Mister Escher, could we have the regular meeting after lunch?
Escher: I don't see why not. Unless something vital comes up, of course.
Milli: Of course. Kinda goes without saying.
Escher: Not to most of the class...
Milli: True...

Needless to say, something vital comes up.

Escher: Professor Kelly was reading in the library last night when he reports a... bright flash of light which has rendered him blind.
Milli: That's kind of strange.
Escher: Quite. So, I was thinking you could take a look.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

04-15-2004, 07:39 PM

Professor Kelly (Doug Bradley (http://www.dougbradley.co.uk/images/bradleyposter.jpg)) rubs at his eyes and blinks repeatedly. Jake shines a light in his eyes.

Jake: Can you see anything?
Kelly: Yes. Thank you. Ow. Stop that.

Kelly: Thankfully, my vision seems to be returning. I was worried it was permanent, even though the hospital assures me they couldn't find anything wrong with my eyes or on the CT scan...
Andy: So what were you looking at?
Kelly: That new study on Giotto's use of perspective.
Milli: What happened?
Kelly: I looked over because I heard someone moving around. So I called out. I mean, this was at about half-eleven...
Milli: Could have been William...
William: Nuh-uh.
Milli: Just a joke.
Ziggy: You made a funny? Woo woo!
Milli: Don't have to get all girly about it.
Ziggy: It's a cause for celebration. It only happens once a month or so.
Milli: I'm funny. Don't make me kick you... Kicking is funny...
Ziggy: No it isn't.
Jake: Depends where. And if slapstick isn't funny, why throw water?

Ziggy shakes his head and goes the way the professor pointed, towards the Ancient History section. Whispering something, he nods to himself. Milli and Jake go to look as well. Jake runs a finger along the shelves, and pauses at a gap, blinking as he sees an image of Skel lifting a book, glancing over at a noise and unleashing a flash of light...

Milli: You okay?
Jake: Skel did it and ran way.
Milli: Ziggy's Skel?
Ziggy: Why's he my Skel?
Milli: You're his precious boy.
Jake: Can we find out what the missing book is?
William: Let me check... Got it. Local Palaeolithic monuments. Standing stones.
Milli: Arg.
Jake: Like the stones around the colleges.
Milli: So why the flashy?
Ziggy: A spell.
Milli: How, how powerful is he?
Ziggy: I dunno.
Milli: He's your bad guy.
Ziggy: Ahem.
Milli: Why'd he want to affect the Shield? He can already send people. And things...
Emma: You can always send more things.
Milli: Good point.

The group continue their discussions as they go.

Andy: How about I sniff out Skel and you never have to worry about him again?
Ziggy: Because we'd never have to worry about you again.
Jake: And it's hard to track a guy who can teleport.
Milli: And he's human. Um, he is human, right?
Ziggy: By some definitions.

Milli: We should really deal with that guy, though.
Jake: Hunt him down and...
Milli: Um, lock him up. We can't kill him.
Ziggy: We can't really lock him up either.
William: There are ways of draining magic.

Jake: It'd help if this place had security cameras.
Emma: So we could see them... hey. See them.
Milli: Yeah?
Emma: Yeah! Why didn't I think of this sooner! We blocked him using divination, he might not have! At least for that Mac guy.
Jake: We don't need hair or blood or something?
Emma: You can get pretty far with a name. Which is why we don't know Skel's. (looks at Ziggy) Or yours.
Ziggy: Or Jake's.
Emma: I do. Anyway, I'll have to research it.

Jake: So Zig, you gonna help, or still worried your feelings might cloud things?
Ziggy: Okay...
Milli: Don't get all...
Ziggy: I'm not all... I have no strong feelings.
Jake: So...
Milli: We're trying to help.
Ziggy: Yeah...
Jake: What friends do.

They reach the office. Sunita smiles welcomingly. She's decided to wear a suit with notably softer lines today, worn her hair down...

Milli: You look nice today, miss.
Sunita: Thank you.
Milli: I was thinking of getting a pair of those stretchy leather patrol trousers... Oh, hey, how did your meeting go?
Sunita: It was scheduled for now...
Jake: He was delayed. Skel was up to something.
Sunita: So, what do you know about Skel?
Ziggy: I know he has a bad haircut and a funny accent...

They usher Ziggy inside.

Milli: If you need an out, you can give me a call.

And then she turns off her phone...

Milli: So, breakfast?
Emma: Seems like a good idea.
Milli: You're researching.
Emma: Just in general.

Sunita: Now, I thought we could go through a list of Skel's alleged crimes and look for spell use.
Margot: A sort of thaumatological profiling...

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

04-15-2004, 07:42 PM

Later that day, the group discuss their leads. Or lack thereof.

Ziggy: Look, I don't know that much.
Jake: Maybe there's some hypnosis we can put you under.
Sunita: I could do that.
Emma: And can we be there to watch?
Ziggy: No!
Milli: I'm sure it'd be very valuable.
Ziggy: Et tu, Brute?
Milli: It's just for fun... (quietly) and she looks all nice today...

Milli: So patrolling then pub. We might get you a round if you're done with the hypnosis.
Ziggy: All hypnosis and no play makes Ziggy a dull boy.
Milli: That's okay, you're already dull.
(Drama Point and Meow.)

Ziggy shakes his head and relents to hypnosis. Sunita starts to wave her pendant, "subtly" leaning forward as she does.

Milli: So, patrolling. Us, Margot... Mister Escher, could you take notes?
Escher: I'll see if he says anything interesting.

Margot hands out route maps. Milli looks slightly perplexed.

William: (quietly) We do route mapping, remember? As a group...
Milli: What, you thought that was a good idea?

She shrugs and stuffs her map into her pocket.

Sunita: You're just not concentrating. We're trying to find repressed memories of traumatic experiences.
Ziggy: I'm sure I'll have a couple tomorrow... Wait... it's coming back to me. He uses... a custom-made gun that... looks like a cigarette lighter. And he charges a million dollars a hit...

Sunita nods and takes notes. Escher arches an eyebrow...

Cut back to the patrolling group.

William: Did you hear that?
Milli: No...
Jake: Yeah.

William hefts his axe and advances.

Sunita: Wake up Ziggy. I'm sure that will be very helpful and... I must get this transcribed...

She rushes off. Ziggy smirks and turns to Escher.

Ziggy: You think the Broccolis will sue?
Escher: Pardon? Is broccoli in the habit of suing?
Ziggy: The Bond producers.
Escher: Ah. Tsk.

Meanwhile, those doing something productive find themselves facing a mottled grey and purple thing.

Margot: Ah! Now this is... Anyone?
Milli: A dead demon.
Jake: Bingo... Um... do we shoot it or what?

He says as he runs into hand-to-hand combat with it... Milli hangs back, thinks, then throws a dagger into its throat. It gurgles and stumbles back.

Margot: That's right. Well done.
Jake: Hit the neck, right?

And he slashes its head off with his sword, even as Milli unloads her crossbow. The head is still gurgling as it flies, but the bolt stops it.

Jake: If you'd said the neck earlier I'd have done that right away.
Milli: I said it as soon as I thought of it!

Jake shrugs and turns to William as Milli glares.

Jake: You brought sample bags, right?
William: Of course... better hurry, it's dissolving into chitin and goo.
Milli: These things aren't very common, are they?
William: They're Etruscan. They've spread throughout Europe but not in great numbers.
Milli: So this wasn't just out hunting...
William: Probably not.
Milli: Sent by Skel?
William: Nice that he's thinking of us...
Jake: Hope Ziggy remembered something useful...

And back to Sunita transcribing the tape.

Ziggy: (on tape) He was collecting diamonds to build a, er, magic laser...

William: Well, if there were demons sent after us, we can call it a night and go to the pub. Wait, no, that's a bad idea, leading demon assassins to the pub...
Milli: Let's finish the route you... the route we planned.
William: Right, who has the map I made?
Milli: Um... (retrieves the crumpled map, glances at it quickly) Look, here we are, just about done!

And thus our heroes withdraw to the public house, meeting up with Ziggy.

Milli: So how's it going... with the lovely Sunita?
Jake: Did she empty your head? Did it take very long?
Ziggy: It was a waste of time.
Milli: I was hoping it'd be useful.
Ziggy: How about I set you up with Jack?
Milli: You want me to kick you now or wait another two minutes for you to get some more out?
Ziggy: I dunno, ask Sunita.
Milli: Why do all your decisions go by her now?

Sunita enters.

Sunita: Good evening all.
Jake: Finished with your bag of goo? Did you enjoy it?
Sunita: Ah, yes. I've sent it for further analysis.
Jake: It was a positive ID from Milli herself.
Sunita: Very good. On that note, you might find these useful...

She hands over a pack of index cards.

Sunita: The twenty most common demonic manifestations in the British Isles, categorised by appearance, forms of attack and weaknesses.
Ziggy: Ooh, Top Trumps!

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

04-15-2004, 07:45 PM

Next morning finds Sunita looking at the results.

Sunita: And the transcripts of the hypnosis session are here if you want to read them.

Jake, Emma and Milli take a look as Sunita goes to get some tea.

Jake: He's so got her. Aww.
Milli: Dude...
Ziggy: What, you feel you're connected over your not having a clue?
Milli: No. Dude, she's so into you.
Ziggy: Nah.
Milli: Yeah...

Emma: Finally got a breakthrough. Skel's, I dunno, sidekick Mac isn't concealed. (holds a plumbline over a large street map) Sidekick is just good guys, right? Henchman? Anyway... Carnarvon Road. Right about... number... 32.
Ziggy: Isn't that nice. Now come on, we should go look.
Milli: Research first, then look.
Ziggy: Look first, then see if we have to research.
Sunita: Very sensible.
Milli: I think you're really having an effect on him.
Sunita: You think so?

Milli: So we get all tooled up. And obviously we'll need a devastating... uh... plan.
Ziggy: Hm.
Milli: Aww, mopey. (prods his arm)
Ziggy: 'm not mopey...

They head off to scout out the location. They arrive just in time to find Mac leaving and heading for the corner shop.

Ziggy: Do you have ways of tranquillising him?
Milli: Uh, no, we didn't bring those? Maybe we can hit him with sticks?
Jake: We could get Sunita to hypnotise him.

Emma suppresses a snicker.

Sunita: I have a anaesthetic in here somewhere.
Milli: Give me it.
Sunita: Do you know how to use it safely?
Milli: Give it to me!

Ziggy steps out, murmuring to himself, raising his hand. Mac spots him, turns to run... and stops, stumbling and falling. Milli dashes over and injects him with the anaesthetic, and the gang bundle him back into his house.

Jake: Alright, what happened there?
Ziggy: He keeled over...
Jake: Because...
Emma: You can do that?

Looking around Mac's house, they find a roomful of TVs recently fallen off the back of a lorry, with one in use... watching the group's usual booth in the Brody.

Milli: Okay, that's quite... scary...

Tessa: (by hidden microphone in the bar) So what is going on with Milli and that Jamaican guy?

Checking Mac's wallet, they find cash, a driver's licence under a different name... and a mobile phone with "Work" listed among the numbers. They don't get much further before Mac opens his eyes.

Jake: Hi, how are you?
Mac: Bit numb. Well, it's the whole gang. How scary.
Milli: Well, I don't wanna be scary.
Mac: Pity. You're the scariest. Apart from the werewolf, obviously.
Milli: Aww, thank you. (beams)
Ziggy: Now, feel free to tell us everything.
Mac: Yeah, that's gonna happen.

Andy flexes his fingers.

Milli: We want to know where Skel is.
Mac: I'm sure you do.

Ziggy: Five minutes.
Emma: What?
Ziggy: Give me five minutes with him.
Milli: Uh... will he be alive?
Ziggy: Yeah.
Milli: C'mon.
Sunita: I don't know if it would be appropriate...
Milli: Well, we're discussing our overall strategy...

Milli hustles the group out... mostly to make Ziggy look good.

Ziggy: Now, this can either go the easy way or the hard way. The easy way, you tell me what I want to know. The hard way, I have to hurt you.
Mac: How about the plea bargain way?
Ziggy: I'm listening...
Mac: I tell you what I can, and I can still walk to the police car that one of the boy scouts has already called.
Ziggy: Depends what you can tell me.
Mac: Course.
Ziggy: Start talking.
Mac: Sure. Well, we have orders not to hurt you.
Ziggy: I was afraid of that.

Ziggy punches him across the face.

Mac: Wonder you made it off the island alive.

Ziggy hits him again.

Mac: Okay. That's probably bruised enough to look like I didn't give him up right away. Now, I have three guys reporting your movements to me. And Skel has however more he doesn't tell me about.
Ziggy: Cameras?
Mac: Just the one in the pub. Couldn't get at your office.
Ziggy: Now, what about this book on Palaeolithic stones?
Mac: Passes the time, doesn't it? Besides, the boss says it's always nice ta know the ley of the land. Ley? Ha ha... Suit yourself. I think he wants ta see if there's a good place o' power round here that isn't bein' used as a battery by your, ah, "glorified circle o' garlic markings".

Ziggy steps out looking troubled.

Milli: How'd it go?
Ziggy: Nothing much. Got a few names.
Jake: And the book?
Ziggy: He's looking for a mystical battery.
Milli: For what?

Ziggy: Give William or Emma the stuff to look at.
Milli: Did he know anything else?
Ziggy: No.
Milli: Did you ask him?... Stupid question.
Andy: Do you watch us on Thursdays?
Mac: When you lose at the pub quiz?

They make themselves scarce before Inspector Arnold of Cambridgeshire CID arrives.

At the office, meeting with Escher, they discuss what to do next.

William: Well, we need to look up stone circles.
Milli: We can call Oxford and see if they have a copy of the book.
Jake: This was a normal book.
Milli: Oh, right. So we might have something more detailed...

And then the door flies open.

Skel squints as he looks the doorframe up and down.

Skel: Nah this, this is very clever. My compliments to the chef.

He taps the doorway and the air ripples.

Skel: Yeah, verra nice. Keep the dog out, I suppose.

And with that he grabs at the air. It flashes white around his fist, crackling and hissing.
Emma raises her hands and starts speaking, repeating:

Emma: The key will not turn, the way is barred, the key (grits her teeth) will not turn, the way is... barred - ! Aaa-aagh!

Emma falls to her knees, clutching her head and screaming in pain.

Jake grabs a sword and charges. Milli loads her crossbow...

Skel's fingers tear through the barrier, leaving torn white rags of energy floating in the air until he pulls them aside and steps through. He looks up with a smirk, eyes jet black.

Skel: Now then. Shall we?

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

04-15-2004, 07:47 PM

Escher draws his sword and Sunita loads her pistol crossbow, even as Milli fires hers.

And the bolt clatters to the floor in front of Skel.

He catches Jake's sword swing and shoves him back five feet, sending him skidding across the floor into the corner.

Ziggy picks up a tray full of weapons and flings them - with his mind. They scatter away from Skel.

Escher's sword thrust across Skel's shoulder is deflected by a casual forearm block, and he's shoved backwards. Sunita's crossbow bolt rotates in mid-air and flies back towards her, pinning her sleeve to the wall.

Skel: Nah, see, this ain't at all what I heard about Watcher 'ospitality. Where's the tea an' scones, eh?
Andy: I ate them!

Skel gives Andy a funny look (and the Director gives his player a Drama Point).

Skel: You tried it on wit' a lad in my employ. 'At's dirty pool, that is. Not as I really care, y'unnerstan'. But I gets the feelin' you was lookin' inta my withdrawal from the library as well, werencha? Trynna stop a fella betterin' 'imself. Criminal, 'at's what it is.

Andy and William charge - and find out what smacking into the Shield must feel like.

Milli dives around and lunges with a sword.

Skel: Look a bit different from last time. Pity. I liked it. Maybe you can, ah... (licks lips)
Milli: What?
Skel: Maybe put it on fer me later, eh darlin'?

Milli shrieks furiously and slams the hilt of her sword against his face. It's the first attack that actually knocks him back... Then he looks past her. At Ziggy.

Ziggy: You want a piece of me?

Ziggy stands straight, hands outstretched... and eyes jet black.

Ziggy: Let's go.

He unleashes a searing bolt of white light at Skel. He blocks it but has to grab the doorframe not to be blasted across the corridor. The frame cracks under the pressure as he rights himself and fires back a stream of burning purple light. Ziggy raises his hands to dispel it, feet sliding backwards across the floor until it earths like lightning all around him.

Skel grimaces, tears the air open behind him to reveal a portal of roiling black and purple light, steps back into it and closes it in front of him with a gesture.

Ziggy sags, panting, blinking a few times until his eyes return to their natural colour.

Milli stares at him in shocked disbelief.

Jake crawls over to Emma as she stops screaming. Wide eyes filled with pain and tears find his, and she holds on to him tightly, sobbing onto his shoulder.

Jake: It's okay... it's okay...
Emma: Don't let me go, don't let me go...

Ziggy: See, I got up today, knew it was gonna be a sucky day. And I was right...

Andy rolls over with a groan.

Escher clambers to his feet, retrieving his sword and clutching his upper arm with a wince of pain.

Escher: He just tore through the spell it took... three weeks to cast and reinforce?

Escher releases Sunita, then rounds on Ziggy, as he leans heavily against the desk, apparently exhausted.

Escher: You...

Ziggy looks up, a little warily.

Escher: I think you need to lie low for a while.

Ziggy nods slightly and looks away.

To Be Continued
GRR! ARG!

Craig Oxbrow

04-15-2004, 07:51 PM

Escher V/O: Next time on The Watch House:

Milli blinking in disbelief at Ziggy.

Emma hugging Jake, in tears.

An unknown woman (played by Rosario Dawson) stepping up to Andy with a dazzling smile.
Adelia: Hi, I'm looking for Ziggy, is he around?
Andy: Not at the moment. Um, who are you?
Adelia: Oh, sorry. I'm Adelia. I'm his sister.

Escher V/O: The next episode of The Watch House is Lessons Learned.

--

Actual Play bit

A lot of plot this time, but not much interaction. The in-character chat time was pulled in various directions that didn't all really work. It didn't help that several of us were knackered from clubbing the night before or otherwise exhausted. Probably the individual episode we're all least happy with. Gah.

colbabe

04-15-2004, 09:12 PM

Originally posted by Craig Oxbrow
Milli: I have this problem with pronunciation.
...
Margot: Now, who wants a scone?
Ah, but how do they pronounce "scone"? :D

thenewgirl

04-15-2004, 09:15 PM

gah! awesome!!!!!

:D

damn to be continueds.......

colbabe

04-15-2004, 09:32 PM

Originally posted by Craig Oxbrow
Ziggy: ...Wait... it's coming back to me. He uses... a custom-made gun that... looks like a cigarette lighter. And he charges a million dollars a hit...

Sunita nods and takes notes. Escher arches an eyebrow...
ROFL!
Ziggy: You think the Broccolis will sue?
Escher: Pardon? Is broccoli in the habit of suing?
Ziggy: The Bond producers.
Escher: Ah. Tsk.
IMHO, this should have been at the end of the show, just before Grrr! Argh!
Jake: You brought sample bags, right?
Weirdness. Not sure about the rest of the world, but in Brisvegas, sample bags are what you get from the city's annual Exhibition, and they're usually full of junk food and plastic toys. Anyone else have something similar in their home town? If so, what are they called?

Craig Oxbrow

04-16-2004, 07:49 AM

Originally posted by colbabe
Ah, but how do they pronounce "scone"? :D
Correctly, of course. :p

("Skon", for those wondering.)

Brisvegan "Sample bags" sound like "goodie bags".

Joe Dizzy

04-16-2004, 08:23 AM

Originally posted by thenewgirl
damn to be continueds.......

You think, you know what's to come... you...

...are probably right.

:D

Joe

Craig Oxbrow

04-16-2004, 04:57 PM

The Watch House 2.8: Lessons Learned Part Two

Milli: punkette Watcher trainee trying to get over her feelings for Jake
Ziggy: badass sorcerer as it turns out, genuinely concerned about Milli
Jake: psychic civilian wondering how Milli feels about him
Andy: quiet unassuming hereditary lycanthrope, in control, oh yeah, you betcha
Sunita: Watchers' Council very proper teaching assistant

(Absentee)
William: Mister Watcher Trainee, in full-on NPC mode again
Jack: rugby-playing civilian, fallen in with the Watch and out with the squad

(NPC)
Escher: gloomier than usual Watchers' trainer
Emma: Jake's spellcasting Scottish SO, currently fragile after losing a magical fight with Skel
Margot: Watchers' Council fairly slapdash teaching assistant
Skel: Professional sorcerer and torturer sent to bring Ziggy back alive

Previously on The Watch House:

Skel bursts into the office, tearing through Emma's magical barrier even as she tries to reinforce it, leaving her screaming and clutching her head. He deflects Milli and Sunita's crossbow bolts, catches Jake's sword swing with his hand and throws him across the room, knocks Escher's sword aside and elbows him in the face, creates a wall of force to repel the charging Andy and William... Only Milli manages to affect him at all... Then Ziggy blasts him across the room with a bolt of lightning from his hands, eyes turning jet black. Skel opens a portal and escapes, leaving everyone staring at Ziggy...

Craig Oxbrow

04-16-2004, 05:00 PM

The group pick themselves up. Jake helps Emma into a chair and she sits there, shivering.

Milli: What did... what did you do?

Ziggy looks down, exhausted, his eyes normal again.

Emma: Tried to... tried to hold him back... oh God...

Jake holds her.

Emma: He just... spent weeks making that... he just... and you... (glares at Ziggy) You could've... you didn't... if you weren't here... You bastard! You have all this power and you lie about it and I tried so hard and it hurts so much (leans back, shoulders sagging) and he just coulda killed us... He could've...

She shivers and starts to cry again. Jake puts his arms around her.

Emma: ...just killed us... can't do this... (looks down, shaking her head) can't do this...
Jake: It's okay... it's okay...

As their voices drift off, silence falls.

Then Margot comes in carrying a box of scones. She looks around and rocks back on her heels.

Margot: Um... did I miss something?
Sunita: Yes. Yes, you did...

CREDITS!

Craig Oxbrow

04-16-2004, 05:02 PM

Escher: Right. You need somewhere to hide. William, call your parents.
William: Uh... right.
Sunita: Won't they know he's gone?
Jake: They won't know where.
Ziggy: It's just a few days.
Sunita: What if they know where our families live?
Margot: Should we all go?
Ziggy: I'd be fine by myself.
Jake: Yeah, it looked like you could handle yourself back there.
Ziggy: Oh, you noticed that?
Jake: It's a knack I have.
Ziggy: Anyway, I should move after this. Draws attention. It's like screaming in church.

Sunita: Might we not be safer staying here?
Escher: I'm not sure of anything at the moment.

And Milli looks away from Ziggy for the first time since the lightning attack, furrowing her brow at Escher's confession.

Ziggy: Does your place have cable?
William: We can get Channel Four now.

Ziggy looks over at Milli as she sinks into a chair.

Ziggy: Cheer up. I'll be off while you have fun researching.

She doesn't look cheered up.

Escher: I'll bring the car around. Someone pack a bag for Ziggy, forward it to us. (to Sunita) You're in charge.
Sunita: Right. Well, we have to fill out incident report forms.
Jake: Report forms?
Ziggy: That was hardly an incident. Skel came in and left due to a lack of scones.

Milli looks up, to Escher, more for reassurance than an answer...

Milli: What can the Council do?
Jake: Maybe they know some more powerful magicians?
Ziggy: Maybe they can make some edible dynamite!
Milli: (angrily) Only if you eat it.

They lock eyes, and Zig looks away first.

Andy: I don't know about anyone else, but I'm in the mood to watch some horror movies.
Jake: Scanners?

As he strokes Emma's brow.

Escher: Maybe you should go and pack a bag for Ziggy.
Andy: Oh, uh, right.

Ziggy: Mill.
Milli: Hm?
Ziggy: In case he shows up again, call me first.
Milli: Instead of what, dying instantly? Because I figure if that's what we have...
Ziggy: I can leave you a little scroll. Crumple it and I'll come.
Milli: All the way from the country to bury us. That's good of you! How about something that might take down that shield that stops me kicking his head in, that'd be good!
Ziggy: If Escher thinks it's safest for me to be away... I guess I better go.
Milli: (quietly) Right.

Andy: So what kind of attacks do we have?
Sunita: Magic.
Milli: That involves someone other than Ziggy having the magic. Em's out of commission...

And she looks concerned for just a moment. Emma looks up slightly, nods, and lets her head droop again.

Ziggy: Hopefully when we're back...
Milli: If there's still a "we".
Jake: There will be.

Andy: How about we hit the books?
Milli: I think that's taken as read, Ted.

Escher and William return. Andy gets up to pack a bag.

Jake: I'll, um... can you stand?
Emma: I think so.
Jake: Come on, I'll take you home. Then I'll find those bugs in the pub and take 'em out.
Milli: I think they're the least of our problems. I mean, what, they know we joke about Jack being gay?
Jake: Yeah, well, I wanna do something at least sorta useful.

Ziggy: Okay... Well, in case I don't see you again...

Milli looks like she expects that.

Ziggy: Keep positive.

Sunita goes to call the Watchers' Council and Margot goes to restock supplies.

Milli is left alone in the office. She goes to find a book on the enchantment of weapons, and sits down to look through it. And once there's no-one to see her, she starts to tremble, shivering with shock and fear...

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

04-16-2004, 05:10 PM

Jake sits Emma on her bed.

Jake: How are you feeling? I can't even imagine how that must have felt.
Emma: The link cut off when the pain got too bad. It still hurts but at least I can see straight again.
Jake: Do you want something to eat?
Emma: Not hungry. I think I'd throw up if I tried to eat something... I think I just need to sleep...
Jake: Okay. I'm gonna go and take out those -
Emma: Don't go.

William's father greets a glowering Escher, nervous William and subdued Ziggy at the gate. He tries to be reassuringly cheerful.

Mr. Grove: Come in, come in. The more the merrier. Sort of a shame the entire group doesn't have to lay low. So, how is everyone?
Escher: We've been better.

Andy roots around in Ziggy's room.

Andy: Shirts. I like that one...

And as he tries it on, someone knocks on the door and an unknown woman speaks...

Adelia: Hello, I'm looking for Ziggy, is he around?
Andy: I'm Ziggy...

And we cut from Andy opening the door with this potentially fatal little lie, back to Jake and Emma.

Jake: Okay. I won't go anywhere.
Emma: Just... just hold me.

And as he does...

Emma: I love you.

Jake's brow furrows and he says nothing...

We cut back to Andy opening the door and finding a young woman (played by Rosario Dawson (http://us.ent4.yimg.com/movies.yahoo.com/images/hv/photo/movie_pix/sundance/sundance_photos/rosario_dawson/sundance.jpg)) smirking.

Adelia: No you're not.
Andy: Er... no.
Adelia: Is he around?
Andy: Um, wait a moment... no...
Adelia: So, are you like his roommate?
Andy: Uh, no, just a friend. Don't worry, I know where he is.

And he subtly kicks the bag of clothes under the bed.

Andy: So, uh... you are?
Adelia: Oh, sorry. I'm Adelia. I'm his sister.
Andy: Oh, uh, right, um, didn't know he had a sister.
Adelia: Well, there you go. Is he going to be long?
Andy: Maybe I'll give him a call...

And cut to Ziggy looking at his phone and reading NO SIGNAL on the display screen.

Andy: Not getting anything. How about you give me your number and I'll call you when he calls back?
Adelia: I don't give boys my number quite that easily.
Andy: Oh, uh, I... uh...
Adelia: (grins) I'll see what my father says, he's speaking to Ziggy's tutor, Mister... Etcher.
Andy: Escher.
Adelia: Ah, you know him. Coming?
Andy: Oh, uh... yeah.

Milli looks up warily as someone knocks on the office door. She hides a throwing knife in her sleeve as she opens the door, to find two men in well-tailored suits standing there. Benjamin Roots (played by Carl Lumbly (http://www.dearsally.org/alias/images/seasonone/dixon02_touchstone.jpg)) smiles politely as his eldest son Thomas (a shaven-headed Keenen Ivory Wayans (http://www.blackfilm.org/i2/people/w/wayanskeenan/002.jpg)) nods a greeting.

Benjamin: Good afternoon, miss. I am looking for a Mister Escher.
Milli: He's not here...
Benjamin: When do you expect him back? I wish to discuss the education of my son Ezekiel.
Milli: Ezekiel?
Benjamin: (smiles affably) You might know him as "Ziggy".
Milli: Oh, ri - (blinks) - did you say your son?

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

04-16-2004, 05:17 PM

Benjamin: Ah, yes. My son. (proffers a hand) Benjamin Roots.
Milli: Gosh. (shakes his hand) Milli...cent. Blackhurst. Um... different than I... Ezekiel? (smirks)

She lets them in. Benjamin looks around with a smile, Thomas gives the room an appraising eye.

Benjamin: Yes. We are just visiting Britain for a few days, and of course we wanted to see him.
Milli: Oh, well, actually he's not here. He's gone... away.
Benjamin: And Mister Escher?
Milli: With Mister Escher actually. Zi...zekiel hasn't seen much of the countryside. It's an educational trip to... the Lake District. Or somewhere.
Thomas: So this is part of his schooling?
Milli: Er... I don't think so. I don't really know either of them that well.
Benjamin: Or, would this be Watcher business?
Milli: Um... the... what business?
Thomas: Watcher business.

Milli backs against the desk covered in books, trying to block their view.

Milli: Uh, more that they needed to talk. About, um, something.
Thomas: Are you involved, miss?
Milli: Me? No...

Benjamin moves around and looks at the cover of the book she left open.

Benjamin: "On the Enchantment of Weapons and their usage in combat against Mystical Barriers."
Milli: Erm... well... I dabble. Um, not a big part.
Benjamin: Really.
Milli: Yeah. I mean, they all wear tweed. I got better things to do than hang around with -

Andy comes in.

Milli: - a bunch of weirdoes.

Adelia looks in and smiles warmly.

Andy: Ah, um. You must be Ziggy's family.
Thomas: Yes, we must.
Andy: (to Adelia) This is the place, then. Um... And... I wasn't raiding Ziggy's room. No matter what it looked like.
Adelia: Good. (beams)
Thomas: (quietly) Strange young man.
Milli: Yeah.

Milli: So, Ziggy's family. All the way from Jamaica to see him. And we really don't know much about you. At all.
Thomas: Perhaps, since we know nothing about one another, we could have dinner and discuss things? Everyone is invited.
Milli: Uh, sure.

Jake stands at the door of Emma's room, watching her sleep, then closes it gently and steps out... eyes downcast, brow furrowed...

Benjamin: I'm afraid we're quite a dull family. I run an import-export business in Kingston. Thomas looks after my accounts, Adelia is studying politics, my youngest Julian is... taking a year out, I believe you call it?
Thomas: And, ah, Watcher activities?
Milli: We're curious about that too. In Jamaica.
Benjamin: Of course, we know a little about the mystical arts, but only Ezekiel... "Ziggy" has really looked into that. He may have inherited some power from his mother, rest her soul...

Thomas: We were hoping to see what he does here. He refuses to write or call...
Milli: Well, he's... very... busy.
Thomas: I am surprised to hear that.
Milli: Well, not necessarily with studies. He has a lot of hobbies. And, er, friends.
Thomas: Would you be one of them?
Milli: I guess, I know him, I think... sometimes... no, not really.
Thomas: I see. I was hoping to talk to some of his friends about him.
Milli: I can do that...
Thomas: About how he's doing.
Milli: Oh, very well.
Thomas: And the Watcher aspect.
Milli: He just hangs around, doesn't really help out...
Thomas: That sounds like him.

Ziggy's elder brother smiles thinly.

Benjamin: His departure was the result of dealings with another business family that lack our... moral restraint. Bad crowd. Ziggy did his best to help those fighting them.
Milli: What did he do?
Benjamin: He stopped a deal being made.
Milli: What kind of deal?
Benjamin: One that God-fearing people would never consider making.
Milli: So, a deal with a demon.
Andy: Oh, we've done that. I mean, we've done the stopping part.
Benjamin: He's very brave. Makes a father proud. Of course, this made him enemies. And so we discussed sending him here with Mister Zabuto, and agreed it would be best. Of course, we miss him every day...

Jake comes in, carrying a bundle of wires.

Jake: Hey, I found the camera and (looks around) hi how are you (to Milli) who's this?
Milli: This would be the father, brother and sister of (smirks) Ezekiel. Sometimes known as Ziggy.
Jake: Ezeki... whoa.
Milli: This is Jake. Jake is probably Ziggy's closest friend.

The Roots family look Jake over. Behind their backs, Milli beams at him. He manages not to respond.

Sunita steps out of the side room after two hours on the phone, looking at her notes.

Sunita: Now, the Council have forwarded our concerns to the - what's going on...
Milli: Hi, can I speak to you about the call, in the side office here, you could do with some tea...

And she hustles the startled TA back into the side office.

Sunita: What is...
Milli: Do you have any background juice on us?
Sunita: Um... some? Who are these people?
Milli: That would be Ziggy's family. So they say, anyway. Hence the wanting the background.
Sunita: Are you worried it isn't?
Milli: They do look a bit like him. Although... but come and meet them anyway. They're lovely. And his older brother... I'm sure you would get on, actually. He seems a lot calmer and more thoughtful. And that's a really nice suit too.

Ziggy's older brother, meanwhile, is studying Jake with his gaze.

Jake: So... Ziggy's family. Here to visit him... Today. Of all days...
Adelia: Yes. Bad timing, but the only chance we had to get out of London.
Jake: Uh, right...
Thomas: So. A friend of... heh... Ziggy then.
Jake: Er, yes. Jake. Hi.
Thomas: So what do you study?
Jake: Psych...

Milli: Oh, how was the call?
Sunita: I gave them a very thorough verbal report and they agreed to call a coven in Dorset.
Milli: And that took two hours.
Sunita: Yes.
Milli: Bloody Watchers...

With that, she leads Sunita back out to meet the family.

Milli: Sorry, this is Miss Chadha, Mister Escher's assistant.
Sunita: Sunita.
Thomas: Sunita. Is that an Indian name? It's quite lovely.
Sunita: Uh, yes. (looks at her shoes)
Thomas: I've been to India once. Remarkable country, beautiful, full of wonders...
Sunita: Oh, um, I'm from Leicester.
Thomas: I see.
Sunita: (looks up) But I backpacked around it in my gap year. India. Not Leicester. (looks down again)
Thomas: I'd like to hear more. Perhaps you could join us for dinner.
Jake: Dinner?
Adelia: To get to know Ziggy's friends.
Jake: Dinner would be... constructive?
Thomas: There's a, what, five star restaurant in the hotel. I suppose we might as well try it.
Benjamin: Hm. I have that other meeting to deal with, but you should definitely go. My treat, of course.

Milli grabs Jake by the arm and drags him outside.

Milli: Right, we're going to dinner. See you again shortly. Go to get changed.
Jake: Uh... okay. Because... We're suspicious?
Milli: Yeah.
Jake: Because of...
Milli: The timing. Really good timing.
Jake: What's up?
Milli: Today's up... Oh, how's Emma?
Jake: Could be better. She's sleeping.
Milli: Oh... um...
Jake: I left a note saying to call right away if she wakes up before I get back.
Milli: Right... (changes tack) What do you think about them turning up today?
Jake: Coincidence? Just because he's gone.
Milli: And went big scary eyes and stuff and said it'd draw attention.
Jake: This could be something to do with it? I mean, he never talks about them.
Milli: I think so. And, um, sorry about dragging you into dinner. I mean, you should be... um. Sorry about the downer.
Jake: Mm? It's okay.
Milli: You alright?
Jake: Uh... today's just been a little...

He trails off and looks away. She leans in to try and make eye contact. He looks further away, then fumbles around his pockets for a smoke.

Milli: Oh, um, good idea. Get one?
Jake: Sure.

Their hands almost touch as he passes her a smoke.

Jake: Oh. Do we have to dress for dinner?
Milli: Oh Gawwd... I guess we should.
Jake: Meet up somewhere first?
Milli: Definitely. Where is it?
Jake: The pub's on the way. But I gotta find a tie.
Milli: We might not have time to meet up then. See you there.
Jake: Right.

And he wanders away. Milli watches him go, shakes her head, and tries to call Ziggy on her mobile phone as she heads to her room. Getting no answer, she sends a text message.

Milli: Guess what, your family's just turned up.

Once at her place, she tries the landline to the Grove house as she looks through her wardrobe.

Milli: Mrs. Grove? Hello, it's Millicent. Yes, I'm fine... I was wondering if I could speak to Ziggy... right, well, when he gets back in, tell him to give me a call. Thanks. Bye.

Jake looks dazed as he searches his wardrobe.

He still looks rather dazed as he arrives at the Crowne Plaza hotel, in suit and tie. Thomas (in a dinner jacket befitting James Bond) and Adelia (in red satin (http://us.ent4.yimg.com/movies.yahoo.com/images/hv/photo/movie_pix/universal_pictures/josie_and_the_pussycats/rosario_dawson/josiepre2.jpg)) greet him, Andy, Sunita and Milli.

Andy has swiped Ziggy's shirt and one of his ties. Sunita has opted for a white dress decorated with blue flowers (http://us.ent4.yimg.com/movies.yahoo.com/images/hv/photo/movie_pix/miramax_films/ella_enchanted/parminder_nagra/ellapre2.jpg) and matching heels. Milli looks uncomfortable as a valet takes her coat, leaving her standing in a formal black dress last worn at a funeral and matching flats.

Valet: And your bag, miss?
Milli: I'll keep it with me.

Her book bag clinks slightly, being full of weapons...

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

04-16-2004, 05:19 PM

Jake looks around at the decor, not at Milli.

Sunita: Milli, you do look nice.
Milli: Thank you. Thought I better.

Since he now can't avoid looking, he glances over.

Jake: Cool dress. (then to Sunita) Cool dress. (then Adelia) Very nice too.

Thomas pulls out chairs for the ladies to sit.

Milli: Obviously you got all the manners in the family.
Thomas: He's disgraced himself, has he?
Milli: Once or twice.
Thomas: Not with you, I hope.
Milli: Oh yeah... Oh, uh, not like that.
Thomas: Hmm. I'm afraid I'm not familiar with the local cuisine. Recommendations?
Andy: I'm having the steak. Rare.

Jake fiddles with his collar.

Jake: Hmph.
Thomas: You seem... tense.
Jake: Oh, um... not much for ties.
Thomas: You should have said, we could have arranged to have you allowed in as you were.
Milli: (quietly) Now he tells us.

Thomas: Now, if you don't mind my asking, I take it you are all involved on some level with the Council. I don't wish to pry, but do you know what he does, how they... interfere with his studies?
Jake: They don't interfere with his studies at all.
Milli: He doesn't really get on with them that well.
Jake: Rebellious streak.
Thomas: Some have said... And you?
Jake: Me? Nah, just a mate.

Milli: If I might ask, what's the situation like with the Council in Jamaica?
Thomas: We had little contact with them. We only wished to ensure his safety. To be honest, we have to rely on what Ziggy tells us. Which is nothing.
Milli: But he got involved through your dealings with another family?
Thomas: I'm not quite sure. I stick to... the real world.
Milli: But your father... (yawns) Sorry. I don't really do the student lifestyle. Early to bed and all.
Sunita: Yes, there was mention of another family?
Thomas: I don't know. Ziggy got involved with the wrong type, and ended up caught between two lines.
Milli: Your father said something about helping you with another family.
Adelia: A business rivalry. That lead indirectly to his conflict with magic.
Thomas: Not everyone back home deals with vampires and werewolves...

Andy bites a breadstick a little too loudly.

Thomas: ... and Martians.
Milli: Of course not.
Thomas: I apologise. It's just that the Council is so secretive...
Milli: Ziggy's very secretive about everything. It pisses me off. But anyway, tell us about Ziggy growing up. You must have some brilliant stories.
Thomas: What's to tell? He was a noisy, nosy, annoying little brother.
Andy: I can sympathise. But with a sister.
Thomas: What about you? Any siblings?
Jake: Nope.
Sunita: No.
Milli: Not any more...
Thomas: Oh. My condolences.

Thomas turns to the wine list.

Thomas: I take it you spend time with him drinking.
Jake: Not all the time.
Milli: He's not that big a drinker really.

Cut to Ziggy opening a bottle of Coke as he comes in, receives the message from Mrs. Grove and tries to call Milli's mobile. It beeps... in her coat pocket... in the hotel cloakroom.

Thomas: Truth be told, I'm worried about him.
Adelia: We all are.
Thomas: Business back home got him in trouble.
Jake: You think it might have followed him?
Thomas: It's not so far to travel in this day and age.
Milli: He's safe.
Thomas: This, whatever it was, was reason to leave Jamaica.
Jake: Is there some reason you're worried now?
Thomas: No...
Adelia: We're always worried.
Milli: When did you last talk to him?
Thomas: Last year, before he left.
Adelia: He called at Christmas...
Jake: I'm sure he doesn't want to drag you into things.
Thomas: Very considerate.
Jake: He pretty much keeps himself to himself. He thinks we're in trouble, actually.
Adelia: He does?
Milli: Nah, he's like "oh gosh, such mortal peril!" He's just a big attention seeker.
Jake: Middle child.
Adelia: Hm.

The main courses arrive. Everything looks fantastic.

Thomas: Well, this dinner was in order to get to know his friends. And now that dinner has arrived... So, what do you do?
Jake: I'm into music. How I met the guys actually.
Thomas: Miss Blackhurst?
Milli: No, I met Ziggy through Mister Escher. We spent Christmas at his house.
Thomas: I see... what did you do?
Milli: We fought a lot... Mostly we just fight. I kick him, he goes ow.
Thomas: Interesting.
Milli: Keeps me occupied.
Thomas: Too much free time?
Milli: Maybe a bit.

Adelia smirks as she watches Andy speed through his steak.

Thomas: Such ambitious, active students. I'm surprised that you tolerate the presence of my brother.
Jake: He's fun to be around.
Milli: Like a... break from routine.
Adelia: How so?
Andy: You never know what he's gonna do next or say next.
Milli: He's spontaneous.
Jake: Yes, very.

Cut to Ziggy in the Groves' sitting room, reading. Like everyone else in the house.

Thomas: An example?
Milli: You just never know. It's almost like having a TV show hanging out with you.
Andy: Like that time we were in the girls' changing rooms.
Jake: Not me.
Andy: Oh, you didn't know about that!
Milli: (flatly) I did... He was going to take pictures. Oh well, he bought me a drink once. That was surprising.
Jake: He generally just gets water.
Milli: He never seems to have much money.

As she looks askance at Thomas's Rolex and Adelia's gold jewellery...

Thomas: Well then, I shall buy you each a bottle of the house's best, to make up for Ziggy's lack of manners.
Jake: Oh, no, we're just taking the piss.
Thomas: As a thank you for this opportunity to speak, then.
Milli: Nothing too expensive...
Jake: Er, what do you trade in anyway?
Thomas: Wine, funnily enough.
Jake: Really, there are Jamaican wines?
Thomas: The market in Europe isn't that large as yet. We're here for a sideline actually, carvings and statuary. Mostly modern pieces but some antiquities, as well as some other handmade crafts.
Milli: (trying to hide her suspicion) You have contacts here for that?
Thomas: Some, yes.
Andy: So, you import, like, fertility statues?
Thomas: For those who need them.
Milli: Um, how do you know what to get? Do you just look at figures and say "this year we're gonna need leather wallets"?
Thomas: It's a tad more complicated, and far more dull. But now you know so much about us, we barely know the first thing about you.
Jake: Us, we're just students. Adelia, you're studying politics, right? Don't want to get into the family business?
Adelia: Well, I'm sure papa will drag me in somehow...
Milli: Knowing about politics must be useful in international trade.
Adelia: Oh, undoubtedly...

Sunita gets a call.

Sunita: Hello, Margot? Pardon? Alright, I'll be right there. Bye.
Thomas: Problem?
Sunita: Nothing to worry about. Thank you for dinner. It was a pleasure to meet you both.
Thomas: Likewise, Miss Chadha.

He rises to pull out her chair, snaps fingers to have her coat brought over, and smiles charmingly throughout. She leaves looking a bit flustered...

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

04-16-2004, 05:21 PM

Thomas: Ah, dessert. Now, if you'll excuse my pressing the point again, could we discuss the Council? Its treatment of our brother is one of the main reasons for our concern. We want to know how long he will have to stay away from home.
Milli: The Council has just taken him in. They don't really treat him any particular way.
Thomas: But they keep him safe.
Milli: They're watching out for him. And so are we. I mean, that's what friends do. But the Council don't really get involved. Apart from Mister Escher, he's very involved in protecting him.
Jake: You're asking a lot of questions.
Adelia: As my brother says, we're concerned.

Thomas nods slightly.

Andy: He's safe with us. We're a tough group.
Milli: He has friends. Maybe in the Council, I dunno. But he has us, and some more as well.
Thomas: So you are responsible for his safety, Miss Blackhurst?
Milli: Everyone's friends keep them safe. I mean, girls go out drinking together, they make sure the really drunk ones get home safe. We watch out for each other, y'know?
Thomas: So he has started drinking?
Milli: That was an example.
Thomas: So how do you help him?
Andy: We have experience of facing demons.

Thomas and Adelia share a look, then smile.

Thomas: So no reason to worry then. Which is why the Council is paying no attention...
Milli: Well, I wouldn't say that. But Jamaica isn't here.
Jake: Do you know something?
Milli: What kind of danger is he in? You keep saying you're concerned but not why.
Thomas: Apparently we cannot handle it.
Jake: You must know something.
Milli: You've been asking us about the Council all evening. Cards on the table...
Thomas: His 'friends' from back home might be involved. We are by no means experts in this subculture, but we have a few ideas.
Jake: The Watchers can help him, if they know what they're up against.
Thomas: What I know about the Watchers is that they've taken our brother.
Milli: It's not like that...

Jake is about to throw in a comment of his own when a flash of movement catches his eye. He looks over and sees someone run past the picture window... and then something follow.

Jake: Uh, um, excuse me, I gotta... make an urgent phone call.

And he hurries out. Milli waits until he's gone and rises herself.

Milli: Uh... that's our secret code. For... um...
Thomas: Oh... you two are a couple...
Milli: Eeeee-yes... Um... we'll be back soon.

And she grabs her bag and rushes out.

Andy looks up from his orange sorbet, raising an eyebrow and realising that he can't really use Milli's excuse to follow them.

Andy: So... uh... politics? Interesting...
Adelia: Yes, it is really.
Thomas: How about, since they're making a call, I give you a moment to yourselves and see how father's meeting is going?

Milli finds Jake outside, looking around.

Jake: Come on, this way... there's something chasing... I think that's Ginny.
Milli: Okay, I'll get it. How about you distract her? (deadpan) Since you're so good with women.
Jake: You think?
Milli: I can talk to Ginny if it's so awful for you.
Jake: Fine, I'll do it...

And they split up, Jake rushing after Ginny and Mill charging into the alley by the hotel, shouting to the monster. It turns, showing a leathery greenish-grey complexion and a drooling black maw. Milli reacts to this horrific sight by nodding in recognition...

Milli: Oh, it's a... um... Kalo... something...

She goes to kick it in the head, pauses as her foot reaches knee height, remembers what she's wearing and opens her bag, taking out a throwing dagger and a small crossbow. The Kalosomething hisses, rears up and lashes out with a foot-long dark grey tongue at Milli's head...

... as Jake catches up to Ginny.

Ginny: Jake?
Jake: Hi, you okay?
Ginny: Yeah, um, somebody was chasing me?
Jake: Yeah, I thought I saw one of the rugby guys following you...

Milli brings up the knife and slices it in two. The demon gargles green ichor and sinks to its knees. Then she loads the crossbow as it charges forwards claws flailing, and fires into its neck. It collapses into a bigger pool of green goo.

Jake: He's gone now.
Ginny: Right... Um, thanks.
Jake: Hey, no problem. Sure you're okay?
Ginny: Yeah. Say hi to Emma for me.
Jake: Oh... uh... will do.

Milli steps back from the dispersing puddle of ick, then looks up as she notices movement behind her. She doesn't get a clear view of whoever it was, though... but the camera catches a man's silhouette with a bald head...

Milli: How'd it go?
Jake: She was just a bit shaken up. You?
Milli: A lot of ease. It was a Kaloboras. Nothing to worry about really... But I had a feeling someone was watching me...
Jake: Whoever it is, they're gone now.
Milli: The point was that there was someone there. I have an idea who though...

Jake and Milli return, Milli adjusting her dress and wiping Kaloboras ichor off her shoes, to find Thomas apparently waiting to pull out Milli's chair.

Thomas: You look a bit...
Jake: Phone call, bit urgent.
Thomas: She told me.
Jake: She did? (surprised)
Milli: Yeah. About our code. For, y'know.
Jake: Um...
Thomas: It's your business, of course.
Jake: Okay...?

He shares a questioning look with Milli.

Milli: (quietly) Sorry. Tell you later.

Thomas: Sadly, our time is not limitless. We must keep going. We shall be in London for the next two days. When, ahem, Ziggy returns, do let him know that we called.
Milli: Of course.
Thomas: And hopefully next time we meet, Ziggy will be here. Now, let us call you a limousine.
Jake: A taxi's fine.

As they get into the cab, Jake looks sidelong at Milli.

Jake: What did you say?
Milli: Well, you kinda ran off and I figured it was urgent. No way was I gonna let you go alone. You said you made a call, I couldn't say I was gonna help you make a call...
Jake: And...
Milli: (goes red) The only excuse I could think of was sex!
Jake: Whu-what?
Milli: That we were a couple and you wanted to... um... y'know.
Jake: And that was the first thought you had.
Milli: You got up suddenly, either I say "he's lying" and explain or... um...
Jake: Right. Er... good thinking.
Milli: Sorry.
Jake: No, don't apologise. I don't mind...

Each of them looks resolutely out of a window away from the other. Milli turns first.

Milli: And you did get chucked across the office. So you're not at your best for fighting anyway.

Jake glances over.

Jake: I said it was fine...
Andy: Hey look, there's my staircase!
Milli: Right on the other side of the court.
Andy: I can walk it...

And he gets out rather hurriedly.

Milli: Uh... so can I. Um, goodnight.

She steps out in silence, holding her coat closed, looking down at the pavement as the cab pulls away, then turning once it's almost out of sight. Lush's Stray plays softly in the background.

Inside, Jake sits gazing out of the window, his expression unreadable...

Milli shakes her head, then blinks as her phone beeps. A message from Ziggy.

It says KILL THEM NOW.

Milli rolls her eyes and erases the message.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

04-16-2004, 05:22 PM

Milli is up early next morning, reading through the book on enchanted weapons. She looks up as Jake and Emma come in.

Milli: How are you?
Emma: A little shaky. I'm okay though. Have you heard from Escher or William?... Or Ziggy?
Milli: Yeah, I got a text from Ziggy saying "kill em now" after I sent him one saying his family was in town.
Jake: Is he serious?
Milli: It's Ziggy, what do you think? I'm sure if it was really urgent he'd have called.
Jake: Ah, you're probably right.

Then Milli's phone goes off.

Ziggy: (on phone) I'm on my way back. You've dealt with my family?
Milli: Dealt?
Ziggy: Are you okay?
Jake: (listening in) Do we need to be worried?
Milli: You're coming back?
Ziggy: Yes, we're on our way.
Milli: What do you mean, deal with them?

The signal goes.

Milli: This is prolly just an epic pisstake, y'know.
Jake: It's still got me worried.
Milli: Fine. We should go see his family.

And cut to the hotel...

Hotel Porter: I'm afraid the family checked out first thing this morning.
Milli: Did they leave a forwarding address?
Hotel Porter: Not that I can find...
Milli: Kinda left in a hurry.
Hotel Porter: Apparently Mister Roots had an early meeting with a business associate.

And meanwhile, in a darkened house on the edge of town, Skel rubs his neck and winces.

Skel: Bloody kid's... quite a fight in 'im.
Benjamin: That he does, Mister Selton.

Skel turns and blanches as he hears Mister Roots's voice from the shadows.

Skel: Boss...
Benjamin: You tried to kill him.
Skel: Look, boss, 'e drew first. I 'adda defend myself. (desperately) I wasn't goin' for the kill, I swear to ya!
Benjamin: You should never even have been there.
Skel: Right. Yer right. Absolutely. Won' 'appen again.
Benjamin: No. It won't.

Skel backs away, until he hits a wall. Then a hand emerges from the shadows and grabs him around the throat, picking him up effortlessly...

Benjamin: This isn't what I hired you for, Mister Selton. So you force me to terminate your employment.

Skel struggles, kicking and choking, lightning crackling between his fingers briefly lighting up the lean figure in the sober black suit... and then slumps, unmoving. Roots lets him fall and walks away.

Benjamin: My son is not to be harmed.

CREDITS!
GRR! ARG!

Craig Oxbrow

04-16-2004, 05:22 PM

Escher V/O: Next time on The Watch House:

Milli glumly putting a birthday card on her desk.

Milli excitedly hugging a woman of about her age, in the way that friends who haven't seen each other for ages do.

A lot of people gathered around Milli as she blows out two candles on a cake.

Charlotte, in a party hat, looking confused as William slams the door she was looking through.

Something snarling on the other side...

Escher V/O: The next episode of The Watch House is Candles.

DVD Commentary:

Craig: These two episodes are a key turning point in the arc of season two. The forces behind the scenes are revealed, and it's not just another bad guy you can whale on. And on a relatability level, this season's all about facing up to the choices of adulthood and the consequences of your choices. All the characters have chosen to do what they do. They can't all choose who and what they are, but they're all choosing how they act on that. And that's a scary thing, having to choose for yourself.

Emma: I love you.
Derek: Now in the original take, Jake ran out screaming.
Cat: And so did you.
Craig: And so did every guy on the set.

Craig: We talked about having Emma throw up, but decided it was the wrong time for a joke.
Jamie: Which is a shame, because projectile vomiting...
Craig: Always the funny.
Cat: I love that phrase. Projectile Vomiting - when ordinary vomiting just isn't enough!

Milli: This is Jake. Jake is probably Ziggy's closest friend.
As Milli beams...
Cat: ... And here's that buck I had to pass you.

Actual Play bit:

Killing Skel provoked mixed reactions. Andy's player was surprised - "I can't believe you killed Skel, he was such an ace villain" - while Milli's player actually cheered.

For those wondering, Thomas was played by Ziggy's player after Zig left town.

In Episode importance terms, this was Buffy Season Two's Innocence (part two) - the huge turning point, revelations and surprises, Nothing Will Ever Be The Same Again two-parter. It worked better than part one because there was more to do and more chances to react to the big events. The lack of out-of-game exhaustion undoubtedly helped too.

Next time... well, Innocence was followed by the episode revealing Oz is a werewolf, so there's a precedent for a largely unconnected stand-alone episode with a bit of ongoing subplot. Which is lucky...

thenewgirl

04-18-2004, 08:18 PM

A brilliant read, as always.

Good work everyone!
:)

WOW.

Craig Oxbrow

04-23-2004, 02:13 PM

Before we begin, thanks to Dunlaing for the "family visit while Ziggy's away" idea behind 2.8 Lessons Learned. And now, without further ado:

The Watch House 2.9: Candles

Milli: punkette Watcher trainee trying to get over her feelings for Jake
Ziggy: badass sorcerer and son of supervillain, genuinely concerned about Milli
Jake: psychic civilian wondering how Milli feels about him
William: Mister Watcher Trainee
Andy: quiet unassuming hereditary lycanthrope, in control, oh yeah, you betcha
Sunita: Watchers' Council very proper teaching assistant

(Absentee)
Jack: rugby-playing civilian, fallen out with the Watch

(NPC)
Escher: gloomier than usual Watchers' trainer
Emma: Jake's spellcasting Scottish SO
Margot: Watchers' Council fairly slapdash teaching assistant
Skel: mercenary sorcerer formerly employed by Ziggy's father to hunt him down alive, killed for trying a lethal attack
Charlotte: William's girlfriend, civilian
Ginny: friend of Emma's, civilian
Michelle: Friendly nosy civilian
Lawrence and Sophie: yet more friendly civilians
Lisa: you'll see

--

Previously, on The Watch House:

A shot of Milli kicking a practice dummy's head off.

Escher: Milli... has trained alongside potential Slayers.

The group tracking down Skel's henchman Mac.

Skel, as a result, coming to visit, casually disregarding all of the attacks except Milli's, until Ziggy unleashes a bolt of sorcerous lightning from his hands. Skel answering in kind and teleporting out.

Escher and William taking Ziggy to lie low for a few days... and Ziggy's family arriving right after that.

Milli sending a text message: "Guess what, your family's just turned up."

Ziggy's reply: "Kill them now."

Ziggy's father, Benjamin Roots, breaking Skel's neck with one hand and walking away...

Roots: My son is not to be harmed.

Craig Oxbrow

04-23-2004, 02:15 PM

We open on Ziggy and William getting out of Escher's car, heading in to find the others waiting for them in the office. Milli looks mad, Jake suspicious, Emma nervous, Andy wary, Margot and Sunita uncertain.

Milli: So, yeah...
Jake: Okay buddy, you wanna explain what just happened?
Milli: What he said.
Ziggy: Where are they?
Milli: They're gone.
Ziggy: That's bad.
Milli: Could you tell us how? Cause we had no idea. We just went to dinner with them. Because we had no idea we were in danger!
Emma: Hey, hey...
Milli: We're just a little curious!
Ziggy: I get that.
Emma: And also nervous...

Ziggy: Okay, you remember Skel?
Milli: Skel... Skel... lemme think... YES!
Ziggy: Well, he's an... employee.
Milli: Uh... what? As opposed to an employer?
Ziggy: He's part of a chain. Somewhere around the middle.
Milli: So, what, your family is at the top of the chain?
Ziggy: Yes.
Milli: And you think they're out to kill us because...
Ziggy: I got involved in a family spat.
Milli: Spuh... spat? What kinda spat?!
Ziggy: One side uses evil magics, the other... not so much.
Milli: And that first side would be your family.
Ziggy: Yeah.
Jake: So what kind of evil mojo does your dad deal in?
Ziggy: Let's just say he's very bad news magically.
Milli: Up until this conversation that was Skel for me. So you're saying this unbeatable villain, ripped Emma to shreds...

Emma nods slightly.

Milli: ... we couldn't beat or even touch is like nothing next to your father?
Ziggy: Yes.
Emma: (nervously) Oh, good...
Ziggy: He rarely uses his power directly.
Milli: I'm sure Emma's glad to hear that.
Emma: Yuh-huh...
Milli: So how powerful is he, in terms of... ratio?

Ziggy holds his hands about a foot apart, then as far as they can go.

Margot: That's a big fish.
Milli: The first bit would be Skel?
Ziggy: Yeah. There's a reason I tried to get away.
Sunita: And you didn't consider this pertinent information?
Escher: You never thought to tell us.
Milli: And so we just went out to dinner with them.
Sunita: It was a lovely dinner.
Milli: That isn't exactly the point. We were alone and undefended with people you say are incredibly powerful and evil and... we shook their hands and everything.
Jake: Wait, is that bad?
Emma: It could be...
Andy: Oh, great...
Ziggy: Let me see.

He takes Andy's hand and examines it.

Ziggy: No sign of any residual magic. Milli?
Milli: You're not looking at my hand.
Ziggy: (sighs) Fine.

Milli: I mean... I wouldn't mind so much if this was the first time you'd done this. I'd still mind... but this is the latest in a really long line of this kind of thing from you.
Ziggy: The problem is...
Milli: (bitterly) Tell me the problem Ziggy. Make it really good.
Ziggy: The more you know...
Jake: The more you're worried we won't talk to you?
Ziggy: The more you're involved.
Milli: They know our names, our faces, where we live... They took us out for dinner. I think we're very much involved already. You can't protect us by keeping us ignorant. That trick could have gotten us all killed.

Ziggy sighs, sitting on the edge of the reading desk. Finally he looks up again.

Ziggy: They didn't do anything. We're sort of good. We just have to watch our steps.
Jake: What else is left to tell us? Any little bit info that might have slipped your mind?
Ziggy: Nothing else really.
Emma: And we'll just have to trust you on that, right?
Milli: What can we do to stop him?
Ziggy: If I knew that, I wouldn't have bothered to go halfway around the world and try to hide.
Milli: With what Skel can do, if Skel is soooo little compared to him (makes a "little box" gesture) then if he wanted you dead...

(Yes, it's another of those giant pre-credits sequences)

Sunita: Where do you fit on the scale?
Milli: Interesting question.
Ziggy: No it's not.
Emma: Yes it is.
Milli: Very much so, Mister Roots.
Ziggy: I'm not Mister Roots. That's my father.
Milli: Well, like father, like son apparently.

Ziggy grimaces and stands.

Milli: Oh sure, abandon us again to be dinner for your father.

Ziggy heads for the door.

Milli: (shouting herself hoarse) That's right, just turn your back on us again!

Ziggy turns again.

Ziggy: I have never, ever turned my back on anyone. And I'm not my father. Don't say that. Just... Forget it.
Milli: Fine. Just tell me what we're dealing with.
Ziggy: Jamaican sorcery out the wazoo.
Milli: (flatly) That's great. Thanks. (showing her anger again) How about this? Who else will come after us? Does he have more people than Skel?
Ziggy: Probably.
Milli: Is Skel as powerful as his henchmen get? Please say yes.
Ziggy: As far as I know.

Sunita: So how powerful are you on that scale?
Ziggy: ...
Milli: Cause we don't have a scale.
Emma: I have a scale. It's like this.

Emma holds up her thumb and forefinger about half an inch apart. Then moves them closer together.

Andy: Okay, would he hurt you?
Milli: How valuable are you to him? Alive?
Ziggy: I dunno.
Milli: You don't know?
Ziggy: I don't know that much really. Outside my family and a few others I don't know how much magic there is in the world, what kinds...
Milli: I don't even know how much I don't know there.

Jake: Maybe we can figure something out from his earthly habits. His business and all.
Ziggy: That's really just a front for his trade in this world... and other ones.
Sunita: What other worlds?
Milli: (deadpan) Happy other worlds full of pineapple trees and hula girls obviously.
Sunita: Well, that's a start.
Milli: (to Escher) Why is she still here?
Escher: (quietly) Not my decision.

Milli: If he had tried to kill us... say, just to make you alone and miserable. Bang bang bang, we're dead. And you're in the country reading books...
Jake: That didn't happen.
Milli: It could have.
Ziggy: It didn't happen so it doesn't matter.
Milli and Emma: Kinda does.

Sunita: Alright, we need to cover this in depth. Ziggy. (deep breath) What do you know your father and other family members to be capable of magically? What have you seen them do? Which books do they have access to? What allies and enemies do they have? Did your father teach you ? Is -
Ziggy: No, he didn't.
Sunita: there... So, how did you learn?
Ziggy: I picked things up.
Milli: Where?
Ziggy: The library in the house... and here.
Sunita: So what can you tell us?
Ziggy: I could list the books he has which are here, at least.

Ziggy: So, they left...
Jake: They could come back easy. We just told them you were away.
Ziggy: I'm gonna assume he's coming to get me.
Milli: Why did you leave in the first place? Was there a big showdown or did you just randomly up and leave?
Ziggy: Bit of both, really. I could tell there was a fight coming...

Jake: Okay, can you (to Escher, Sunita and Margot) get in touch with Mister Zabuto, the Watcher in Jamaica? See what he knows... and didn't tell you. We gotta try and build a bigger picture of this.
Sunita: Of course. If we can sit and make out a full report...
Milli: Yeah, can you specify I want red roses, instead of pink. What should I put on my gravestone?
Jake: I think I'll be cremated.
Escher: (loudly) I really don't think this is helpful!
Milli: (quietly) Well... what would be? I'm going to uselessly bang weapons off his shield.
Ziggy: It's not just going to be you fighting.
Milli: Yeah, well, you of course are completely separate... If he comes after us, we'll all die.

Escher looks over to Milli.

Escher: No. We won't. Lady Margaret, call the Council and don't stop until you have an answer about the coven. Miss Chadha, call Mister Zabuto. Milli... have you found anything on enchanting weapons to get through mystical wards?
Milli: A little.
Escher: Ziggy, help her.
Ziggy: Meh. What can -
Escher: DO IT!

At the growl in Escher's voice, Ziggy nods slightly.

The energy the group have been using to argue is diverted to something more useful. Milli and William head for the stacks. Escher makes some calls. Ziggy reluctantly answers questions.

Ziggy: You weren't even in danger really, they're after me...
Sunita: At least now we know the danger exists.
Ziggy: Oh, harp on...
Milli: Do you actually understand why we're so angry?
Ziggy: Of course. But it doesn't help us now.

Sunita faxes the information through to Mister Zabuto, after checking with Escher and Milli that it isn't another Bond plotline. Emma researches spells to prevent teleportation effects. Andy drops the book he's reading, revealing he's actually looking through What Hi-Fi. Margot rolls up a newspaper to smack him on the head.

And after several hours, Milli looks up at the clock, and notices it's past midnight. She looks back down.

Milli: (quietly) This really isn't how I wanted to celebrate my birthday...

CREDITS!

Craig Oxbrow

04-23-2004, 02:17 PM

Sunita subtly takes Jake aside as he slots a book back into its shelf.

Sunita: Are you preparing anything?
Jake: Er...
Sunita: For Millicent's birthday.
Jake: It's Milli's birthday? When?
Sunita: Tomorrow. You didn't know? Oh, terribly sorry.
Jake: Um...
Sunita: I feel we should mark it. I'm in the process of arranging a party. Ah, William...

As he wanders by.

Jake: It's Milli's birthday?
William: Yes, it is. As of about eight minutes ago.
Jake: How old is she?
William: Twenty. I think. (starts doing math on his fingers)
Jake: Bloody hell, what can I get her?
Sunita: When in doubt, chocolate.
William: Do you think she'd like that?
Jake: You know her better.
William: No she wouldn't.
Jake: Got it. I'll think of something.

William: Ziggy, you know about Milli's birthday party, right?
Ziggy: Yes. No. I mean...
William: It's a surprise.
Ziggy: Oh good. I think she's gonna kick us.
William: She wouldn't. Well, not me.
Ziggy: So, what, balloons and singing Happy Birthday?
William: She wouldn't be keen on balloons and singing. So we're going to.
Ziggy: Riiiiight. Let me tell Andy.

Ziggy: Andy, there's good news and bad news. The bad news is we're gonna get kicked...

Margot: Have you ordered a cake?
Sunita: I was going to go with a crossbow and stake design, but then I thought the uninformed might find that a little curious...

Jake sneaks over to Ziggy and Andy.

Jake: Okay, I've got an idea I need to work on. What can we do that's not balloons and banners?
Andy: Pub? Booze is a good present.
Jake: Well, it's not her twenty-first, so not a huge pub crawl...
Ziggy: Now we have to make sure she doesn't find out.
Jake: Yeah. (to Andy) That means don't tell her.

Emma sidles over.

Emma: Why are we whispering?
Jake: It's Milli's birthday.
Emma: Yeah, I know.
Jake: Why didn't you tell me?
Emma: I told you two weeks ago.
Jake: You did?... Oh.

She smiles lovingly and shakes her head. He scratches his.

William heads back to Milli as she flicks through another of the pile of books on enchantment he handed her, to keep her occupied. Ziggy lurks nearby, covering Jake and Emma leaving.

William: Find anything?
Milli: Coming up blank.
Ziggy: It depends on the kind of spell involved. Which I don't know, before you ask. Try a dispel, a spell to cut through a specific mode of shielding... or you could infuse a weapon with power.
Milli: Is that the best way?
Ziggy: It could be dangerous casting that on a non-living construct. It could backfire.
Milli: How?
Ziggy: If the weapon's damaged by the destruction of the ward it could cause a chain reaction. The power leaves the object all in one go...
Milli: But is that the best way?
Ziggy: To work it would have to be very, very powerful.
Milli: Could you cast it?
Ziggy: I wouldn't.
Milli: I said, could you cast it?
Ziggy: Maybe, but I wouldn't.
Milli: I think you owe me.
Ziggy: Which is why I won't do it. It could kill you.
Milli: I'm willing to take that chance.
Ziggy: I'm not.
Milli: Look, this has to work. There's no point putting a Fisher-Price spell on it.

Ziggy shakes his head.

William: You said that's a danger on an object. What about a living thing?
Milli: I'm not firing frogs at people.
William: I meant put our werewolf to good use.
Milli: I didn't even think of that... but I need to be able to do something. This means I can use a weapon.
Ziggy: Maybe. For this to work you might have to bind them to yourself.
Milli: And...?
Ziggy: And if someone gets hold of them, that would be bad.
Milli: I take very good care of my equipment.
Ziggy: They could use the link to get through all your mental and physical defences.
Milli: Oh...
Escher: Perhaps we should get some rest. Start afresh in the morning.
Milli: Right. Good idea... good night.

Escher mouths "happy birthday" and smiles gently. She smiles back a little...

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

04-23-2004, 02:20 PM

Next day, Milli is woken early by a knock on her door. Checking the time she sees it's eight. And on a no classes day, a day she can lie in. And her birthday too. She stumbles over to the door...

Muffled Female Voice: Miss Blackhurst, you have some packages.

So she opens the door, and finds there are indeed three packages, being held by a young woman. This is Lisa Foster (Keira Knightley (http://www.keira-knightley.org/multimedia/pictures/Miscellaneous/Various/77.jpg)). She grins.

Lisa: At a guess, they're birthday presents.
Milli: Yeah, I... Lisa? Oh my God!

Milli looks amazed and delighted.

Lisa: I mean, that's why I'm here.
Milli: Oh my God!

She gives her a big enthusiastic hug.

Milli: Come in!

Milli: How've you been?
Lisa: Oh, y'know. Training. Still not the Slayer. (smirks) And since I'm all of nineteen now, probably too old to get the marching orders. But I've been studying and training with Mister Robson, he's great. Check this out.

She hops off the bed, takes on a Tae Kwon Do stance, and does a reverse spinning kick in a blur of movement.

Milli: (whistles) Nice.

She tries to follow it herself and smacks her heel against her closet door.

Milli: Hmm. Need to work on that.
Lisa: Yeah. Angle was a bit low. Still nice and fast though. I'm a brown belt now. What about you?
Milli: Y'know I don't know.
Lisa: Damn, girl, what've you been doing?
Milli: Kicking things mostly. And fencing for formal training. And studying, lots of studying. And, um...
Lisa: Is there a guy connected to that um?
Milli: Um... So, presents?
Lisa: At a guess.

(Milli's player: Presents!)

The packages are indeed gifts, from her parents:

A formal black dress, suitable for going to a funeral.
Mill rolls her eyes and opens the next one.

A thin-bladed dagger and sheath, about sleeve length.
She takes it out, spins it in her hand and admires it.

Milli: Now that's nice.
Lisa: Not too dressy. An afternoon dagger, not just for special occasions.

She flings it across the room and embeds it in a wooden board.

Milli: Weighted for throwing too.
Lisa: You're way better at that than I am...

A new hardback of Voltaire's Candide with a note from Mr. Blackhurst: We would never wish you to neglect your daytime studies.
Milli sighs and nods, and carries on.

A second book in the same box, a copy of The Hobbit from her shelf at home.
She shows a nostalgic, touched little frown.

A card, "to a dear daughter", reading "We hope that you are feeling better."
Mill puts it up glumly, then shakes off her mood and turns back to Lisa.

Milli: So what did you get me? Huh? Huh?
Lisa: The new Ash CD, and... I was thinking shopping.
Milli: Shopping?
Lisa: Y'know, that thing where you go to a shop and buy things. And I pay.
Milli: Well, I definitely need something to go with this knife. Oh, but I have to check in with Mister Escher first.
Lisa: How's the studying going? Since I'll probably be going to uni this year.
Milli: Keeping busy. I mean, it's not like we're out slaying... every night... So, ah, how long are you down?
Lisa: Just a couple days. It was a Miss... Chadha that persuaded Mister Robson to let me sneak off.

Escher looks up with a curious expression.

Milli: Good morning!
Escher: And to you too. Happy birthday. You certainly sound happier. And this would be...
Milli: Lisa Foster, Mister Escher, Mister Escher, Lisa Foster.
Escher: Ah, yes. I've heard good things about you.
Lisa: Thank you, and likewise. Looking after my friend here.
Escher: I try. She's more one to look after herself, really.

Enter William, with stack of books. He looks at Lisa, confused.

Milli: This is William, the other cool Watcher guy...

William drops his books.

Milli: ... (deadpan) from when I grew up.
Lisa: Uh-huh.
Milli: William, this is Lisa, from Glastonbury.
William: Oh! Right! Um, yes, hello. Slayer in training! Wow. Um.

Escher goes to answer the phone, leaving William to be flustered by the presence of a genuine potential Slayer.

William: Oh, um, Milli, I think Mister Escher wants to talk to you about something.

Escher gets off the phone and looks up.

Milli: You wanted to see me?
Escher: Yes, actually... a sighting report sounds like a Qiblos Demon.
Milli: (sighing) Oh bugger.

(DP for perfect timing. About a minute later I stop laughing and carry on.)
Escher opens a tome and finds a picture of a horned lizardy-looking humanoid thing.

Escher: They're a physical subspecies who run in small packs and kill for the highest bidder.
Milli: So how do we kill them?
Escher: They have no noteworthy vulnerabilities, but equally they have fairly weak natural armour.

And cut to seven purple tiger-striped Qiblos demons putting on mail shirts...

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

04-23-2004, 02:23 PM

Milli: So where was the sighting? Because Lisa was going to take me shopping, but we can make a detour for demons...
Escher: The sighting indicates it was moving, and that was last night.
Milli: So, I'll look out for them.

Stepping out, she finds a tired Jake making himself a coffee, Lisa chatting with Sunita and Emma, and Ziggy leaning against a bookshelf observing.

Sunita: Have we met?
Lisa: We spoke on the phone last week.
Milli: Hello all...
Jake: Hi, so, who's your friend?
Milli: This is Lisa, we were at Glastonbury together.
Lisa: And you're Emma and Jake and... Ziggy? You're Watcher Prentices?
Emma: We're just here to help.
Milli: And that's Ziggy.

Andy comes in and demonstrates his suavity with a wolf whistle.

Milli: Wolf whistle. Werewolf. Yes, very good.
Lisa: Werewolf?
Milli: Hereditary. But he's in control. He's a friend.

Jake yawns and blinks repeatedly.

Milli: (to Jake) You okay?
Ziggy: You look like crap.
Jake: Uh, slept badly.
Milli: It wasn't a vision was it?
Lisa: You have visions too?
Jake: Sometimes, but no actually. Just a bad dream. The usual kind. (to Lisa) You too?
Lisa: Part of the package. How about you?
Jake: I'm not really... package?
Lisa: Potential Slayer.
Jake: Ohhhh. So are you being transferred here?
Lisa: No, I'm just visiting Mill for her birthday.
Jake: Oh, right! Happy birthday.

Jake smiles brightly, as if he had no idea.

Emma: Don't worry, I got you something at least.

Lisa: On which note, c'mon. We shop now.
Milli: Uh, yeah, we're gonna do some shopping.

Jake and William share a conspiratorial look as they head out.

Lisa: So which one was The Guy? Sleepy or brooding?
Milli: Oh... doesn't matter.
Lisa: Oh. Sorry.

Jake: I was up all night preparing. Party's at one, right? Reckon I can sleep after it.
Sunita: Uh, no, that's a four on the note.
Jake: What's wrong with one?
Sunita: Lisa needs time to shop, and the catering is for four. Now, William, is your flat ready?
William: Yes... but about that, why my flat?
Jake: It's big enough, didn't need cleaned up... and it looks like it needs partied in.

Milli: This is a really nice knife. Look at the detailing on the handle.
Lisa: And it fits in your scarily big bagful of weapons.
Milli: Yeah. And up a sleeve. Have you seen this one, with the red handle?
Lisa: Ooh, that's pretty. Nice grip. Anyway, we going out tonight?
Milli: There's a club night on at the Basement.
Lisa: So, what you gonna wear?
Milli: I... dunno?
Lisa: Birthday, big club night, Guy... try this.

And cut to Milli and Lisa returning to the office, both looking great. Lisa in a crop top and stone washed jeans, Milli wearing a denim jacket over a strappy top and dark trousers.

And William, Jake and Ziggy lurking around the corner.

Jake: Right, we need someone to get them to come over. Will, you're up.
William: Why me?
Ziggy: It's your flat.
William: But... but... I can't lie! Don't make me lie to her!
Jake: You don't have to lie, just be... vague.

William is duly shoved into the spotlight.

Milli: Hi.
William: Welcome back. I found something important in one of my books there.
Milli: Right, you go get it.
William: Ah, well -
Lisa: Where's Mister Escher?
William: Oh, uh, he's meeting us at my flat.
Milli: But your flat's just around the corner...
William: It's, ah, um, very, um...
Lisa: Heavy? Heavy book.
William: Yes!
Milli: Alright, let's go to your flat then.

The rest of the group hide behind the furniture in William's immaculate living room. Sunita and Margot offer party hats. Charlotte and Andy each take one. Ginny and Emma elbow each other, roll their eyes, and put theirs on. Jake resolutely changes the subject.

Jake: Considering what her reactions are like, when we leap out, are we gonna be safe?
Jake: Yeah, she'll probably stop after she hits Ziggy...

And with that, our heroine enters. She has a moment to notice the Happy Birthday Milli! banner and balloons before Andy, Charlotte, Emma, Escher, Ginny, Jake, Margot, Sunita and Ziggy leap out and everybody shouts:

Everybody: SURPRISE!
Milli: Oh... um...
Jake: It was William's idea.
Milli: Oh! You... bastard! (grinning and tearing up)
Lisa: Now come on and open your presents.

(Milli's player: More presents!)

Escher gives her a small jewellery box containing a silver cross necklace.

Escher: (quietly) I admit, very much a Watcher gift, and you already have at least three, but I did resist my natural inclination to give you a book.

From Emma: A really nice black top.

Emma: I saw it and I thought Milli right away.
Milli: Oh. That's really great, thanks. (tries not to look uncomfortable)

Andy hands over a rather soft, cool package and a square box.

Milli: It's a... steak...
Andy: And a set of steak knives!

Sunita: (quietly) I was right about ordering the vegetarian buffet platter, wasn't I?
Margot: (quietly) Yes. But you try telling that to a lycanthrope...

Milli: So I can make a steak dinner! (grins and grimaces at the same time) For, er, someone...
Andy: Erm... well, if you don't want it, I can find a use for it.
Emma: (quietly) Oh please not right now.
Milli: Sorry. But the knives are great though.

Sunita: Ahem. (hands over a big box) Since you mentioned them...

Milli opens them to find a pair of black stretchy imitation leather trousers.

Sunita: Lots of pockets for, er, your phone and purse and such, which the designer assures me won't interfere with the line.
Milli: Thank you.
Andy: That is so cool...

The others look at Andy. He inspects the sausage rolls.

Margot: And since she was doing that...

Margot's present turns out to be a dark purple sweater.

Margot: Keep you warm when jogging. And the like.

Ziggy hands her a thin, silvery bracelet with a single red gem and murmurs an explanation.

Ziggy: It's enchanted so that when it breaks, you have a few minutes... three at most... to escape. And the gem glows around vampires.

Milli nods slightly and steps back with a faint smile. William gives her a big, dusty book.

Milli: Uh, thanks?
William: Check out the inscription.

He opens it slightly, so that only Milli can see it's actually hollow, containing six silver shuriken with space for more weapons.

Milli: Oh, I thought it was just a book, but...

She notices Charlotte leaning in to get a look.

Milli: It's a first edition!

And she grins as she closes it, very quickly.

Charlotte: I got you a book too. It's a first edition too, but not quite so antiquarian.

She opens the parcel to find a copy of Bridget Jones's Diary.

Charlotte: Not that I think you're like that. I just thought it was, uh, vee funny. (grins)
Milli: Er... thanks. That's... (plasters on a grin) Vee dot good. Really. Great.

From Ginny: a bottle of excellent Champagne from Fortnum and Mason's.

Ginny: Do I need to explain this one?
Milli: Nope.

And she shakes it and fires the cork, expertly near-missing Ziggy.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

04-23-2004, 02:24 PM

Margot lights the candles on the cake. Lisa gives Milli a party hat, and she giggles and puts it on before blowing out the candles. Everyone applauds.

Sunita: Now, as well as cake, there are sausage rolls, vegetarian and not, vol-au-vents likewise, a finger buffet, punch... and Jake cooked some chocolate brownies specially. They're really moreish.
Jake: (suddenly nervous) How... many have you had...?
Sunita: This is my third. Funny thing is I feel hungrier after having one.

Jake approaches the birthday girl at the buffet table as the party spreads through the flat, and hands her a write-only CD with "For Milli" written on the face.

Jake: Sorry I didn't have time to get a card or make a cover or anything.
Milli: S'okay. Don't like cards anyway.
Jake: It's three demo tracks, and a new song just for you.
Milli: Oh, wow.
Jake: It's just a rough.
Milli: It's a bit more me than Bridget Jones's Diary.
Jake: So anyway, William and Sunita organised this party. Hence it being... traditional. But there's a good gig at the Basement tonight for after.
Milli: I haven't been to the Basement except to patrol since you played there... I should get one of your brownies before Su eats them all...
Jake: Yeah, uh, just the one though. They're... not that good.
Milli: (eating a brownie) Huh? These are great! How many have you had?
Jake: Thr... two. And that was over the whole day.
Milli: Well, I'll have to keep up. (takes another) Hmm. Interesting aftertaste. Tangy...

Jake manages to suppress a wince as Milli picks up a third and wanders off to listen to his CD on her personal player.

She ends up in the utility room off the kitchen, as it starts to get dark outside. She listens to the song called, judging by the chorus, You Rock My World, probably more awestruck than Jake intended... noting all the uses of "we"... then she takes out one of her earplugs as she hears voices from next door...

Emma: So... I told Jake I love him.
Ginny: Oh wow, what'd he say?
Emma: I don't remember him saying anything...
Ginny: At all?
Emma: I was really tired, but I think I would've remembered...
Ginny: Oh God, I'm sorry... do you think there's someone else?
Emma: He isn't seeing anyone... but I think maybe there's someone he wants to...

And the camera tracks back to Milli, eyes wide and brow furrowed as she steps away...

She watches them go back inside, frowning, then turns back to look out into the garden... sees movement in the tree line at the edge of the lawn...

Thinking quickly, she pulls the blind so that nobody else can see it, puts the CD player safely on top of the fridge, and charges outside, sliding her new dagger out of its sheath.

Something hisses in the darkness and lopes towards her.

Milli: There you are. Here, demon, demon... got a present for you...

And she walks right past the four pressed against the walls... Two sneak inside as the other two charge towards her!

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

04-23-2004, 02:25 PM

In the living room, Ziggy tilts his head slightly as he sees Milli charge past, then hurriedly shuts the curtains.

Ziggy: Jake, Andy, can I talk to you in the kitchen?
Jake: What's up?

He points outside as Milli kicks a demon in the chest. Then draws the blinds.

Jake: Right.
Ziggy: I'll keep everyone busy. You go help her.

And out they rush to find Milli stabbing a second Qiblos in the head.

Milli: This is a really good knife...

She looks around slightly as the other two snarl at the guys.

Milli: Oh, hey! Did you see my new knife?

Andy: Grrr-
Jake: Don't wolf out, man, we're trying to be sneaky.

Jake hands Andy the box of steak knives... and he fumbles with the catch...

Escher gets a phone call and heads outside.

Milli: It's running!
Jake: We'll get it.
Milli: It's my birthday!
Jake: Well, then, we'll... hold it for you?

Milli misses with a jab, then Jake misses with a sweep kick and lies face up on the lawn. Andy stabs it in the back with the largest steak knife, catches it on its armour and snaps the handle off.

Andy: It's okay, I still have the receipt!

Ziggy heads over to Emma and is about to explain what's going on when there's a knock at the door. He runs to answer it, opening it just a crack to look out.

Michelle: Oh, hiya! Sorry I missed the start a' the party.
Ziggy: Ah. Um, hi Michelle. Come in...

Charlotte heads into the bathroom. William ever-so-subtly hurries past her.

William: Just checking the coast is clear.
Charlotte: What?
William: That nobody's, um, using it.

There's a growl from the bedroom next to the loo. Charlotte turns to look, Will from his angle can see a Qiblos heading for the door.

Charlotte: What was that? Sounds like a dog or something...

He slams the door a little too quickly.

William: Yes, probably a dog. Next door. Ooh, draughty in here.

He smiles a bit too cheerily and opens the bathroom door with no further comment, as he grips the handle of the bedroom door to keep it shut.

Ziggy looks up at a loud thump from upstairs.

Ziggy: Hey everybody, how about we play a game? It's called Hide and Peek.
Ginny: Peek?
Ziggy: Yes! It's Jamaican. You hide, and when you hear someone coming you peek out.
Ginny: And...?
Ziggy: That's it!

Michelle: I haven't seen the woman of the hour yet...
Ziggy: She's... ah... around...

In the garden, Milli tries to punch the demon and misses as it finally falls over when Jake grabs its ankles.

Milli: Where'd it go? Oh. I kicked it. Go me!

She stabs it while it's down, and Jake rolls away from the thick purple ichor oozing out of it.

Then Andy takes a seat as well.

Andy: I'll keep an eye out. Because I need to sit down. Where's my beer?
Milli: Look at that, they're collapsing into purple ook. I hope I haven't got any on my shoes. Did you see my knife? It's really pretty. Mmm, I could have another brownie.
Jake: (standing unsteadily) How many of my brownies have you had?
Milli: Three. Why? They were really good. Ooh, I feel nauseous.
Jake: Uh... no reason.

Our heroes stumble inside, Jake looking a tad guilty about something... They pass the utility room, missing the glowing purple eyes peering out at them. Milli rounds up Lisa and Sunita as William continues to hold the door shut.

Milli: Qiblos demon crashers.
Sunita: Do they have presents?
Milli: ... No...
Sunita: Right. Let me just get my crossbow and a sandwich.
Lisa: You're still hungry?
Sunita: ... Yes. Funny, I had four of Jake's brownies. And three sausage rolls. And a sandwich. And four vol-au-vents...
Milli: There's this other slight problem. You invited Charlotte and Ginny.
Sunita: They'd be your friends, so... yes?
Milli: They're... civilians.
Lisa: Oh. Ohh... Oh, bollocks. That might make things a bit... tricky, mightn't it?
Milli: Yup.
Lisa: Oh.

Sunita: William, what are you doing?
William: Big demon in the spare room.
Sunita: Oh. Right.

And she takes out her dinky crossbow and rushes in - and promptly shoots a hole in the window.

Everyone in the living room looks over. Emma very quickly steps on a balloon and everyone looks at her.

Emma: Oops!

Charlotte looks out from the bathroom, puzzled. Lisa beams as she sidles past into the room. Charlotte shakes her head and makes way for Margot to get into the loo.

Ziggy winces at a knock at the door. He heads over, powers up an attack spell, and opens the door slightly to find Escher there.

Escher: I've received a call which leads me to conclude that the Qiblos are coming here specifically.
Ziggy: Why?
Escher: I wonder.

Escher looks suspiciously at Ziggy. Zig scowls and shuts the door. Escher hammers on it again, then shakes his head and goes around to the back garden.

Emma and Ginny head for the kitchen to get more punch. Ziggy quickly hides his hand behind his back. Sunita opens the door of the spare room, crossbow in hand. Emma makes a quick gesture and the door slams before she can step through it and Ginny can see her. Stuck inside, she looks puzzled and knocks at the door.

Sunita: Er, hello?

Lawrence and Sophie sneak out of the kitchen.

Ziggy: I didn't see you guys come in.
Sophie: We came in with Ginny.
Ziggy: Ginny's been here about an hour.
Lawrence: We were in... the garden...
Sophie: It's very... nice.

Assuming the coast is clear, Lisa heads out of the spare room.

Ziggy: You still have your coats.
Lawrence: I knew we forgot something!

And Lawrence takes their coats and tosses them into the guest room, being used as the cloakroom. Where they land on the glowing-eyed figure lurking in the darkness...

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

04-23-2004, 02:27 PM

Hearing a growl from the cloakroom, Milli sneaks past the line for the bathroom.

Milli: I'm just going to... check on my coat.

She pauses to pick up William's present, then charges into the cloakroom.

Escher heads into the back garden, to find Andy sleeping propped against the kitchen door. Tutting, he look around... then up as a dark figure hisses above him, clinging to the wall.

In the cloakroom, Milli empties the secret compartment full of throwing stars at the demon as it pulls Lawrence's coat off its horns. Most of them deflect off its armour, but one lodges into its shoulder and it gurgles in pain, lashing out as Milli steps back and punching a bookshelf.

As he returns to the living room. Jake looks over at the gurgling and thumping, winces, and quickly puts the music up louder. Then he skips two tracks and puts on Ash's Kung Fu.

Milli may or may not hear this, as she grabs a jacket and throws it over the growling demon's head. As it flails, trying to unhook it from its horns, she elbows it in the head and then kicks it in the stomach...

Lisa looks in, ready to assist as needed, and smiles as Milli knocks the demon down with a reverse spinning kick to the head.

Escher tenses as the climbing Qiblos flings itself off the wall and drops towards him snarling, and he grabs the box of steak knives - and clubs it on the head with it.

Milli tries to shake the worst of the demon goop off the jacket.

Milli: I wonder whose jacket that was.
Lisa: So this is what you do, huh?
Milli: Pretty much. We do what we have to do. We fight. We keep watch.
Lisa: Cool. Is there any more cake?
Milli: Maybe. I'd avoid the brownies though. I think they're a bit funny...

Then yet another Qiblos charges out of the wardrobe. Lisa spins and kicks it in the face and Milli redraws her new dagger and throws it into its throat.

The group assemble and check there aren't any more demons left playing Hide and Peek, then head back into the living room.

Milli: Jake, we're all out of those purple cocktails. Lisa spilled the last one.
Lisa: Er, yeah, sorry.
Jake: Uh...
Milli: (quietly) We need to make drinks that look like demon goop.
Jake: (quietly) Ah. Um... Well, there's a bottle of Bailey's and... something purple.
William: (quietly) Ribena?
Lisa: (quietly) That sounds disgusting.
Milli: (quietly) All the more reason it all got spilled everywhere. William, I'll give you a hand cleaning up tomorrow. Lots of ick, weapons lying around...

As the group prepare to add cream liqueur and blackcurrant juice to the mess, Milli makes an announcement.

Milli: Okay, there's a gig tonight, so... (realises something) I'll get the coats!

As the party shifts, Mill leaves last. She goes to retrieve her portable CD player, and listens to Jake's song for her on the way, looking confused...

She still looks confused as she reaches the club, and we track from her to Jake and Emma dancing together, Sunita spinning in place and waving her arms around her head, Lisa coming over to drag Milli onto the dancefloor, Milli looking back at Jake and Emma, and Ziggy watching all that with a frown...

And we end with Lisa at the station.
Lisa: Sorry about the whole party-crashing demons thing.
Milli: Oh, don't worry. We can't have a party or go out without demons crashing it... Sorry you couldn't stay longer.
Lisa: I know, but, gotta go. Of course, you're welcome to visit, or call, or if you need some Aikido practice... I should be free in the summer. In time for you to throw a party for me...
Milli: So what did you think of the guys?
Lisa: They're all really good. To me at least...
Milli: And Jake?
Lisa: He was cool. And...
Milli: (flatly) His girlfriend's really nice too.
Lisa: Hmm.
Milli: Yeah.
Lisa: So... one of them writes a song for you and the other one makes you magical jewellery. I'd say there's interest...

Milli shrugs.

Milli: I really don't think so. It's any excuse for Jake to write songs, and any opportunity for Zig to use magic. Although (here she does that frown-y thing and looks confused)... nah.
Lisa: But Ziggy doesn't have a girlfriend.
Milli: Yeah, so?
Lisa: Why exactly do you hate him so much? I thought you two were really good friends.
Milli: Well, we were. I mean, we are. He just... I mean, recently he's just... I dunno, he's being... erm... well... (here she does that confused look that's so popular this season)
Lisa: So you're really angry with him because... ?
Milli: (frowns, also something she's quite good at doing a lot) Y'know, I'm not entirely sure. Recently he just seems... different. He's not, y'know, the old Ziggy. And... I'm not completely sure why he's being like that, and it makes me... erm... (she shrugs, in defeat). All I seem to be able to do about it is be angry.
Lisa: Ahhhh. I see. (smiles conspiratorially) Right.

Milli shrugs again, looking at her boots.

Lisa: Sorry. Anyway, that's my call. See ya.

And Milli gives Lisa a hug, waves her off, then takes out her CD player and listens to the song again...

CREDITS!
GRR! ARG!

Craig Oxbrow

04-23-2004, 02:28 PM

Escher V/O: Next time, on The Watch House:

Jake shuddering and turning away from something.
Emma in tears.
Ziggy and William glaring.
Charlotte blinking in disbelief.
Escher going red with anger, fists clenched.
Milli running out of the office, crying...

--
DVD Commentary

Cat: A well-chosen present says a thousand words. Or maybe "please kick me".

(As Charlotte gives Milli Bridget Jones)
Cat: She just has no idea.
Craig: Bless her little cotton socks. Of course I expect to see Mill reading it next episode.

(As William slams the door in front of Charlotte and babbles his excuse)
Craig: Obviously we intended this to be a farce, only with monsters being hidden instead of vicars.
Cat: And how is that different from our normal episodes?

(As Milli listens to Jake's song)
Derek: The song's intended to be viewed one way by Jake and another way entirely by Milli.

--
Actual Play bit

A shot at good old-fashioned silliness, aided and abetted by a little box of Celebrations chocolates. Sadly, I couldn't find a birthday cake I liked.

Originally, Lisa was going to organise the party openly, but Sunita wanting to arrange a surprise party was one of those I-couldn't-have-prepared-it-better moments.

The basic idea (monster home invasion as door-slamming farce) comes from a long-ago post by Kevin Mowery.

Strangest use of a Drama Point so far in the entire series: Milli's player giving one to Jake's in exchange for making him a few months older than Milli, instead of a couple months younger, the better to serve as a (post-)teenage crush. This followed a free movement of the day to a day with no lectures, and vetoing moving it to Christmas.

Her reason? "I wanted to see how far I could push it."

I also stopped her offering William's player DPs to retroactively make Will a girl...

Next week... next week is hardly in my hands at all. PTBs help us all.

colbabe

04-24-2004, 04:00 AM

Originally posted by Craig Oxbrow
Andy stabs it in the back with the largest steak knife, catches it on its armour and snaps the handle off.

Andy: It's okay, I still have the receipt!
LOL! Priceless! :D
Sunita: Right. Let me just get my crossbow and a sandwich.
Lisa: You're still hungry?
Sunita: ... Yes. Funny, I had four of Jake's brownies. And three sausage rolls. And a sandwich. And four vol-au-vents...
OMG... Not that sort of brownie...

And Lawrence takes their coats and tosses them into the guest room, being used as the cloakroom. Where they land on the glowing-eyed figure lurking in the darkness...
Hey, a Ghostbusters reference!

Craig Oxbrow

04-24-2004, 09:55 AM

Originally posted by colbabe
LOL! Priceless! :D
Not 100% sure who actually gave Andy that line... hmm...
Originally posted by colbabe
OMG... Not that sort of brownie...
Yes, of course that sort of brownie. :D
Originally posted by colbabe
Hey, a Ghostbusters reference! Oh yeah... I remember now. Damn...

sasori

04-24-2004, 10:25 AM

Originally posted by Craig Oxbrow
Yes, of course that sort of brownie. :D

Yay! Jake's Addiction finally made it to air! ;)

Hmmm, maybe that could be his band name! :D

Coffee_Lifeform

04-24-2004, 11:28 AM

Originally posted by sasori
Yay! Jake's Addiction finally made it to air! ;)

Hmmm, maybe that could be his band name! :D

*nods enthusiastically*

Has to be done.

Craig Oxbrow

04-24-2004, 11:42 AM

*groan*

sasori

04-28-2004, 03:29 AM

Originally posted by sasori
Yay! Jake's Addiction finally made it to air! ;)

Hmmm, maybe that could be his band name! :D

I've finally chosen a band that could play Jake's band, what with Jake now having the time to put a band together.

All we need is the appropriate time to get them their first gig...:cool:

Craig Oxbrow

05-05-2004, 07:27 PM

The Watch House 2.10: Far Away From Me

Milli: punkette Watcher trainee trying to get over her feelings for Jake
Ziggy: badass sorcerer and son of supervillain, genuinely concerned about Milli
Jake: psychic civilian wondering how Milli feels about him
William: Mister Watcher Trainee
Andy: quiet unassuming hereditary lycanthrope, in control, oh yeah, you betcha
Sunita: Watchers' Council very proper teaching assistant
Jack: rugby-playing civilian, fallen out with the Watch

(NPC)
Escher: dour but fatherly Watchers' trainer
Emma: Jake's spellcasting Scottish SO
Margot: Watchers' Council fairly slapdash teaching assistant
Charlotte: William's girlfriend, entirely out of the loop

Previously, on The Watch House:

Escher looking at Jake's file.

Escher: "Jake" here is apparently slightly precognitive and clairvoyant.

Jake waking from a nightmare, or possibly a vision.

Jake: Escher kinda knew about me anyway. Secret files or something... They're kinda like that. They get to you... (takes a draw on his cigarette) get under your skin.

Emma talking to Ginny, looking unhappy.

Emma: So... I told Jake I love him.
Ginny: Oh wow, what'd he say?
Emma: I don't remember him saying anything...
Ginny: At all?
Emma: I was really tired, but I think I would've remembered...
Ginny: Oh God, I'm sorry... do you think there's someone else?
Emma: He isn't seeing anyone... but I think maybe there's someone he wants to...

And the camera tracks back to Milli, eyes wide and brow furrowed as she steps away...

Lisa and Milli at the station.

Lisa: So... one of them writes a song for you...

Jake handing Milli a CD, her listening to the refrain "you rock my world" rather confused...

Lisa: And the other one makes you magical jewellery.

Ziggy explaining the bracelet's magical properties...

Ziggy: It's enchanted so that when it breaks, you have a few minutes... three at most... to escape. And the gem glows around vampires.

Lisa: I'd say there's interest...
Milli: I really don't think so. It's any excuse for Jake to write songs, and any opportunity for Zig to use magic. Although (here she does that frown-y thing and looks confused)... nah.

--

The Cambridge Museum of Archaeology and Anthropology receives its latest exhibit. Medieval religious art and artefacts. A curator puts a large, blackened wooden chalice on its plinth and steps away. Turning the light off, he doesn't see moonlight stream through the skylight to touch it... or the dust motes swirling around it, glowing as if a bright light glows from within it...

The camera swings through a darkened forest, spinning at the sound of running feet, someone crashing through the undergrowth. Jake, running full tilt through the trees, turning to look behind him then charging onwards. A brief image of someone stalking after him, silhouetted by moonlight from behind him. Jake turns and looks again, stumbles backwards - and his feet find air as he topples backwards into a pit. The size and shape of a grave. The figure looms over him, chuckling.

Jake: No... no...
Sinister Figure: You're not focused, my boy. You're distracted. Thinking too much about something else. Letting your emotions run away with you. I mean, normally I wouldn't get close enough to even TRY this...

And with that, the figure leaps down into the pit and everything goes black as Jake screams - and wakes. He blinks repeatedly, looks around... grimaces and clutches his head.

CREDITS!
Episode written by Derek Robertson and directed by Craig Oxbrow
Additional editing by Tobin, Dizzy and Wilson

Craig Oxbrow

05-05-2004, 07:31 PM

Next morning, Escher nods curtly as Jake enters late and continues the regular briefing.

Escher: You're just in time. We have a location to... analyse.
Jake: Oh?
Escher: A security van was robbed at knifepoint last night. And the perpetrators were described as "wearing masks or makeup so their foreheads were distorted, and vampire teeth".

Milli glances at her bracelet, at the red gem.

Milli: Why would vampires rob a security van?
Andy: Why would vampires dress as vampires?

Everyone looks at Andy...

William: Did they get much money?
Escher: Two thousand, three hundred pounds.
Ziggy: So we get Jake to go do the touchy-feely...

Jake shoots him a look. He doesn't acknowledge it.

Sunita: Were the guards harmed?
Escher: No...
Andy: Are they alive?
Escher: ... They weren't harmed.
Ziggy: Maybe the vamps were vegetarians... what would happen if a vegetarian became a vamp?
Milli: Well, it's a decision of the conscience.
Escher: And vampires don't have consciences.

William: Was the attack outside the Shield?
Escher: It was.
Milli: This was just a robbery? Is there anything else exciting going on?
Escher: Well, there's an excellent exhibition of medieval religious art at the Museum of Archaeology...

Ziggy: Go. Check. Do something fun. Now, do we have a...
Sunita: Cover story?
William: We could be from the student paper.
Ziggy: As opposed to just those pesky kids asking questions... William could be Velma. I get to be Shaggy.
Andy: Who am I?
Ziggy: Well, duh.
Milli: So am I Daphne? But Daphne's an idiot...
Escher: (to Milli) What on Earth are you all talking about?
Milli: Scooby-Doo. Children's cartoon. About kids and a dog who investigate monster sightings. That turn out to be robbers in masks.
Escher: Ah yes. I recall now.
Sunita: It has been around since the early 70s, and the hippy references have made it popular with students...
Ziggy: You're old, man.
Escher: Yes, I am. It's part of my charm.
Jake: Oh is that what it is...

Jake smirks at Escher's sidelong glance.

Milli: So, student paper, go and see what the guards saw. Hmm. We can't all go. Well, we could all go, but it looks a bit like a class outing.
Ziggy: I'll take a camera... Anybody got one?
Sunita: I'd have to take the infrared lens off, but yes.
Milli: Now, the guards... names, addresses?
Escher: Charles Reeves and Dennis Molton. Here are their contact details...
Milli: Hmm. Suburbs. Can't really walk there.
William: We can cycle.
Milli: We can be like the Famous Five!
Escher: You see, I know about them.
Milli: I can be George and you (Sunita) can be Anne. (turns to Jake) You be Julian.

Jake raises an eyebrow and says nothing.

Ziggy: Who can I be?
Milli: Dick!

Ziggy: Can we get a move on? My bum's getting sore. I have a very irritable bum.
Milli: Have or are?
Ziggy: Ha ha.
Sunita: So, the student paper. I can be your, ah, project supervisor.
Jake: I'm not going.
Ziggy: But we need the touchy-feely.
Jake: That would be the van.
Escher: The van is being held as evidence. The coroner can arrange for you to see it.
Andy: And I can sniff out clues. Uh, as it were.
Jake: This bores me. Let's go.

Milli looks at Jake, brow furrowed.

Milli: Are you okay?
Jake: I... didn't sleep well.
Milli: Oh...
Jake: Nothing to worry about. (to Andy) Coming?

Jake and Andy head over to the evidence lockup, while the others go to visit Mr. Reeves. Escher and Margot stay behind at "HQ". Emma, meanwhile, has a report to hand in.

Charlie Reeves looks at the group somewhat blankly.

Milli: Hey... we... are with the student paper.
Charlie: There's a student paper?
William: Just started this year.
Milli: And we wanted to ask about the robbery...
Charlie: Of course, yeah. Five of them, caught us outside the brokerage on Tinsley.
Milli: We heard something about masks or monster makeup?
Charlie: Their faces were all weird. Like this.

He scrunches his face down in a fairly poor impression of a vamp's "game face". Ziggy takes a photo. Then he takes a photo of Milli looking at it. Then of Milli glaring at him. Then of Milli putting her hand over the lens.

Charlie: Only more than that. And, um, they had vampire teeth in. But they didn't look like vampires. I mean, they didn't have red eyes. Sorta greenish. And they didn't have hair like Dracula either. The ones I got a good look at, one was bald, the one did all the talking had his dyed blue.
Milli: What weapons did they use?
Charlie: Butcher knives. And the one with no hair punched the passenger door pretty hard. The leader said if we didn't hand over the money bag he'd slit my throat... and drink it dry.

As the group share a look, we shift to Jake and Andy, heading through the evidence locker.

Jake: So, this werewolf thing. You're in total control?
Andy: I hope so.
Jake: What about at full moon, is it harder? Or easier?
Andy: It's a tradeoff. It's more... stressful.
Jake: How do you mean?
Andy: It's easier to change, whether I want to or not.
Jake: So it's harder further away?
Andy: Yeah. But I tend not to go out at full moon.
Jake: What's the phase now?
Andy: Nearly full.
Jake: Really.
Andy: Yeah. It's like... a moth and a flame. I can resist easily if I think about it. But if I get distracted...
Jake: Oh?
Andy: If I turn deliberately I can keep control. But if I turn by accident I might not.
Jake: What would cause that?
Andy: Stress. Getting scared. Getting hurt badly...
Jake: Okay. Well, I hope not to be in the area if that happens...

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

05-05-2004, 07:33 PM

Milli: Okay, the second guard said he saw one with red hair and one with glasses as well as the bald one.
Ziggy: So if these are vampires, there's five of them.
Milli: Or two and three people, or something. Only the first guy got a really good look. Hmm. Is that a big gang?
William: You can take them.
Milli: Yes, but that's not the issue...
Ziggy: So, Sunita, how does the camera work again?

Jake rests a hand on the door, closes his eyes quite relaxed, and gets a flash of a shaven-headed vampire punching the door with superhuman strength, as a blue-haired vamp in a biker jacket threatens Charlie with a knife. He nods slightly.

Jake: It's vamps.

So the group rendezvous at the alley opposite Tinsley Street.

Milli: Hey. What did you find out?
Jake: Vamps did it and ran away.
Milli: No! Really?
Jake: Their leader had spiky blue hair.
Ziggy: We should check the clubs. Guys with blue hair aren't that common.
Milli: So this is the place. Wanna... do your thing?
Jake: The pavement? No, too much background information...

Then he blinks once and nods.

Jake: They got into a beat-up Renault around the corner.
Milli: But you said... Did you get the number?
Jake: Yeah.

He writes down the car's licence. William takes it and cycles off.

Milli: Okay, blue-haired boy's mine.
Ziggy: Why? Because of the hair?
Milli: Yes. It's the eternal battle of girls and boys. Okay, it's just us. But he's the leader, so...
Ziggy: Well, that makes as much sense as two dice in the desert.
Milli: Huh? That makes no sense.
Ziggy: That's the point.
Milli: That's good, that you're working for that...
Ziggy: Anyway. William's researching. We should go to the pub till he gets done.
Jake: I'll catch you guys up. Gotta do something.
Milli: Seeing Emma?
Jake: Maybe later.

He leaves without another word. Mill manages not to look dejected.

Heading over to the pub, they find that Jack has stopped avoiding them.

Sunita: I'll get the first round. Coke for everyone?
Milli: Um, thank you.

Ziggy: So. Since she's still here...
Milli: Yes, she very much is...
Ziggy: I think we should get her drunk, find out what she was to report.
Milli: Or just get her drunk?
Ziggy: Hm?
Milli: Are you... interested?
Ziggy: Nah. So, shall we do it today?
Milli: Might as well.

Ziggy: Miss Chadha... ever tried the cocktail selection here?
Sunita: No...
Milli: Maybe a delicious... what's that raspberry thing?
Ziggy: Red Dawn?
Milli: Not that one. Far too much alcohol. You should try a lovely Bailey's chocolate cream.
Sunita: Little early, isn't it?
Milli: Oh, there's hardly anything in it.

Milli sneaks over to catch Tessa at the bar.

Milli: Hi. Can I get a quadruple Bailey's loaded up with chocolate syrup?
Tessa: Er...
Milli: I'll try it, keep loading it until I can't taste alcohol.

Knowing better than to ask, Tessa prepares the drink, and also a glass of water for Milli to wash her mouth out after tasting it...

By the time she's done, it's most of a pint containing ten shots...

Milli: Sorry it's in such a big glass. Tessa put a bit too much milk in.
Sunita: I haven't had anything since that champagne last week. That had a lot of kick...

Jake takes Emma out to the museum. They chat about the exhibit, her course as it relates to magic and religion...

Emma: See, this chalice comes from a church burned down during the Cathar Heresy. They believed the human body was a trap for the soul...
Jake: Really...

And he peers at the chalice, smiling ever so slightly, until Emma takes his arm and pulls him along.

Emma: I was thinking afterwards we could -
Jake: Go back to your place?
Emma: I was gonna say get a coffee, but...

Jake smiles lovingly.

Emma: We could do that...

Sunita sips the impromptu truth serum and nods appreciatively.

Ziggy: So apparently you've been a Watcher longer than we -
Milli: (quietly) Not until she's had a drink...
Ziggy: (quietly) Just getting her started on the subject.
Sunita: Sorry, you were saying?
Ziggy: We were just discussing our need for secrecy.
Sunita: Ah. Good idea. That fellow over there's rather close...
Milli: Oh. Look who it is...
Ziggy: Oh good. Jack's coming over.
Milli: Jack knows. Well, some. He's occasional... infantry.
Ziggy: More like an extra target.

Jack doesn't hear that, as he beams at the politely-smiling Sunita.

Jack: Nice to meet you.
Sunita: Ah, yes. Hello. I believe I saw you at Milli's party?
Jack: Yeah, for a while. (looks at Milli) Not wearing the necklace I got you?
Milli: The, uh, diamond necklace?
Jack: Yeah, that's the one.
Milli: It's a bit... dressy. Very much for special occasions. Dressing up.
Jack: What, as a schoolgirl?
Milli: Not like that. But my parents gave me the perfect black dress for something formal.
Jack: Like the end of term ball? Just a few weeks to go.
Milli: Er, yes. But I'm not sure I could wear it to... such a... boisterous student event.
Ziggy: (quietly) That and you traded it in for a silver letter opener.
Milli: (quietly) It was a really nice one!

Ziggy changes the subject before Milli can kick him.

Ziggy: So. Jack, Sunita. You have something in common. Neither of you has spent much time in India!

As they look at him, puzzled, William arrives.

William: The licence plate belongs to a Fiat which was sent to Farley's scrapyard a few months ago. There's no report of the plate being stolen... Are you guys always in the pub?
Sunita: It's their informal headquarters.

Jack: So, what's going on?
Milli: Vampires robbing security vans.
Jack: So, what do we do now?
Milli: I dunno, check out the scrapyard?
Jack: We could send Ziggy out wandering, he's bound to get mugged by something evil.
Milli: You really haven't been around lately...
Jack: Huh?
Ziggy: How about you go wandering, see how that works out for you?

Ziggy: It wouldn't be so bad if he was right. But they wait till after I leave.
Milli: That's perfect, in theory, except for the people you leave behind...

Jake slides an arm around Emma's waist as she opens the door to her room, turns her around and kisses her deeply.

Emma: You're being really... today was great. You were so... sweet.
Jake: I just know how... quickly things can change, and I don't want to waste time...

And with that he picks her up and carries her into the bedroom...

Sunita sets the empty glass down shakily.

Sunita: Mm. Nice.
Ziggy: So, what's it like in... Leicester.
Sunita: It's sorta normal I guess. I went to a private school, then on to Churchill College, Prenticed as a Watcher...
Milli: You come from an old Watcher family, yes?
Sunita: Yes. The Chadha family. Old. Watcher. Yes. Two hundred years. Very honourable tradition. Yes.
Ziggy: So you basically know nothing but being a Watcher.
Sunita: Oh, not at all. I've done a PhD in Biology. And I have a lab.
Milli: Well, could you imagine life not as a Watcher?
Sunita: Why would I want to?

Jack: (quietly) She's kinda drunk.
Milli: (quietly) Ziggy's idea. I think he may be... interested.
Jack: So, like most women and Ziggy. Like you and Ziggy.
Milli: Except she likes him.
Jack: And you don't...
Milli: No, I mean, well...

And she falls silent as Jake and Emma enter, arm-in-arm. Jake looks pleased with himself. Emma looks a little bemused...

Jake: So, any news?
William: We tracked the licence plate to a scrapyard.
Jake: We should check that out, then check the clubs like Ziggy suggested. How's Charlotte, by the way?
William: She's good.
Jake: Any chance she's coming out tonight?
William: Probably not, she has an Early Modern History paper to do.
Jake: So you might not see her for a while? Sorry, man.
William: It's okay. Anyway... scrapyard. Anyone wanna come along or are you drunks staying here?
Ziggy: I'll stay here. (quietly to Milli) And make sure she doesn't fall on her face.

En route to the scrapyard as it gets dark, Jake puts an arm around Emma.

Emma: Today's just been wonderful... I've been thinking something has to change, and it has. It's been really surprising. I was thinking because you didn't say anything...
Jake: Oh, Emma, how could you not see it, I do love you, through and through. There's no-one else but you, you are who I live and breathe for. It's only you...

He gives her a big hug and kiss... opening his eyes midway to wink at Milli over Emma's shoulder.

William: (quietly) Can you believe those two?
Milli: They're really great together... (suppresses a sigh) How are things with you and Charlotte?
William: Really good. I presume, I have no frame of reference. What about you, got your eye on any -
Milli: No! (tries to sound less hasty) No, no... not at the moment...

She drops behind and stealthily puts on her portable CD player, listening to Jake's song, looking resigned...

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

05-05-2004, 07:34 PM

Jake slams a fist against the scrapyard's chain link fence, sending it rattling.

Jake: No dogs barking?
Andy: No dogs.
Jake: What kind of scrapyard doesn't have a dog?
Milli: This kind.

She holds up her hand to show the red gem in her bracelet glowing slightly.

Andy: So how do we get in?
Jake: Just climb it. Or I could pick the lock, if you give me a -

Milli clambers up the fence and vaults over it, landing on her feet and pulling out her crossbow...

Andy climbs over, sniffs, and heads off in another direction. Milli tuts as the glow from her bracelet brightens as she carries on her way.

Finding the office, and a beat-up Renault with a slightly crooked number plate attached, the group spread out.

Jack: Want me to go up and knock?

Milli kicks the door in.

Jack: Polite as ever...

Inside, Jerry the blue-haired vampire discusses things with his minions.

Jerry: So with the next place we hit we - what the - Grrraa!

Milli looks unimpressed and puts a crossbow bolt through him. Jack and Jake charge in to tackle the next two, as Emma hangs back holding her cross necklace and William looks for a piece of pipe to use as a weapon.

Meanwhile...

Ziggy: So, how do you handle being a Watcher and a woman in today's society?
Sunita: Well, it can be a... lonely life...

Ziggy looks around hopefully to see if anyone's come back yet.

Sunita: The long hours... the deadlines... Get it? Dead lines?

Milli spins around and kicks the skinny vampire in the stomach, sending him crashing over a table.

William charges in, underestimates the length of the pipe and jars his hand as it bounces off the doorframe.

Sunita: But this has been great. I was actually worried about it as it isn't my usual sort of assignment, but getting out of the lab... meeting new people... you've all been so nice to me... you have some really nice friends...

Jake pins the shaven-headed vampire's hand to the floor with a knife. The vamp howls in pain.

Jack punches the vampire with glasses across the office.

William shifts the pipe in his hand, runs in, and promptly bashes it off the ceiling.

Milli stakes the skinny vamp as William finally manages to hit the red-haired one.

Milli: We should question one.
Jake: Already arranged.

And he stabs a second dagger into the bald vampire's other hand to emphasise his point, pulling out a third and tapping it against the vamp's throat...

Andy looks in.

Andy: Hey, guys, I think I've got the trail here!

Milli looks up and rolls her eyes.

Milli: Wow, that's really helpful...
Andy: Oh. Um, never mind.
Milli: By George, I think he's got it!

Jake crouches over the pinned vampire, smirking.

Jake: Now. You can die really quickly... or really, really slowly.
Milli: We have some questions.
Jake: And every time we ask and you don't answer...

He stabs the vampire in the chest, cutting around the heart. Milli looks away, busying herself with retrieving her crossbow bolt.

Jake: See, now that's the quick way. Looks good, doesn't it?

He idly drags the knife around the vamp's heart, leaving a spreading red circle on his vest...

Bald Vamp: What do you want to know?
William: Where the money is?
Bald Vamp: Still in the car...
Milli: What you wanted the money for? Buy a new car maybe?
Bald Vamp: Jerry owed this guy in London some money.
Milli: That's it? I thought at least you were a cult trying to buy some evil artefact!
Bald Vamp: Listen, missy, I'm really sorry we're not all supervillains tryin' to destroy the human race -
Milli: Fair enough.

And with that she stakes him. She strides out, looking dramatic as the vampire dust spills out of the doorway after her.

The others follow. Jake is the last to go, as he retrieves the knives. He looks out at the others, and grins...

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

05-05-2004, 07:37 PM

As the group return to the pub:

Ziggy: She touched my knee about seventy-five times!
Milli: Er, sorry. Did you learn anything?
Ziggy: Nothing to worry about except the two of them sticking around to actually teach us. She thinks with the added level of threat we could do with it... What about you?
Milli: We sorted them out. Jack hit a guy with glasses.
Ziggy: Did he get thrown fifteen feet?
Milli: The place wasn't big enough. Anyway, they robbed the van to pay off a loanshark.
Ziggy: God damn they're stupid!
Milli: Yeah, I thought at least there'd be a ritual to stop or something.
Jake: No. Just bigger and worse monsters wanting money. Vampires... they're basically cattle. Do what they're told.

Ziggy: So, victory drink?
Milli: Not offering to buy are you?
Emma: I'll help you get them in, so you don't try to escape.

As they head over to the bar, Jake looks over and stifles a yawn.

Ziggy: So, time for a victory drink or having an early night?
Jake: Had a long day.
Milli: With Emma...
Jake: Yeah... You okay?
Milli: Fine... (looks down)
Jake: Hmm.
Jake: I'll walk Miss Chadha home.
Milli: Not gonna wait for Emma?
Jake: I am kinda tired.
Sunita: Thanks. I am feeling very tired and It will be a long day tomorrow. Well done everyone. Don't worry about writing this up tonight.
Jack: So, who's Jerry? I don't know a Jerry...
Milli: We may have dusted them a bit soon...
Jack: So, is there a Mister Chadha?
Sunita: My father, yes. Watcher. Long tradition...
Jake: Come on...

Ziggy and Emma return after they're gone.

Ziggy: Frown?
Milli: Yeah. My drink's kinda funny.
Jack: Does anyone else feel... unfulfilled? The fight, I mean.
Milli: Like you're not getting job satisfaction? Hmm.
Ziggy: You're getting too casual about vampires.
Milli: Nah... you think?

Emma: Um... where's Jake?
Milli: He took Miss Chadha home. She's a bit tipsy. Jake's nice like that.
Emma: Yeah, but... I thought he'd say something.
Milli: Come on, I heard what he said. You've got nothing to worry about.

Jake smirks as Sunita looks through her handbag for her keys.

Jake: Any chance I could get a coffee?
Sunita: Oh, um, sure.
Jake: Let me get that...
Sunita: Thank you.

Jake twirls his lockpicks around his finger as he follows her inside.

She totters to the kitchen. He looks around, looks through the CD collection, and selects a relaxing classical piece.

Jake: Been a while since I heard this...

Milli: Did you say something about another drink?
Jack: Getting drunk?
Milli: Yeah, that's the plan.
Emma: Did Jake say when he'd be coming back?
Milli: Actually he said he was kinda tired.
Emma: He didn't say that to me...
Milli: What are you worried for?
Emma: I dunno. He's just been running hot and cold lately. He was so... um... romantic today...

As Jake takes the tray of coffee cups from Sunita, he slides his hands across hers, steering her to set the tray down.

Sunita: Um... don't you... want...
Jake: I want.

And he leans in to kiss her...

Emma stands outside the pub, arms folded to keep herself warm, brow furrowed.

Emma: Well, no call or anything. And she was all drunk and knee-touchy.
Milli: From that incredibly non-alcoholic cocktail. C'mon, it's Jake. He was just trying to make sure she got home safely. He'll have walked her home and headed off. Cos he's a good guy.
Emma: Yeah, he is.

Sunita stumbles onto the couch and flops onto it, Jake seating himself beside her.

Sunita: I think I'm a little...
Jake: Don't worry about it.

He catches her eye, holds his gaze.

Jake: Don't worry about anything.
Sunita: Don't worry... about anything...

Milli and Emma start walking home.

Milli: Give him a call if you're really worried. But he's probably just knackered and forgot to say goodnight.

Em nods, but makes the call anyway.

The phone rings off, unanswered, in the pocket of Jake's discarded jeans...

Milli: Maybe he left it in another room... building... maybe he's sleeping. Cheer up... he loves you.

She manages to sound reassuring even as she hides her lip trembling.

As meanwhile, Jake slides out of bed, reaching for his shirt and glancing back at the sleeping Sunita with a thin smile.

Milli sees the not entirely reassured Emma home, then calls him herself.

Jake tilts his head at the phone, reading Milli's name on the screen with a grin. He blinks, and his eyes glow and turn bloodshot, irises turning from grey-green to brown, then back, as he snaps the phone in two.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

05-05-2004, 07:39 PM

Next morning, Sunita wakes to find herself alone.

Sunita: Strange dream... Jake, of all people... the boy's clearly...

Then she looks at the dent in the pillow next to hers... gets up and heads into the living room and finds two cold cups of coffee.

Sunita: Oh... no...

Arriving at the office, Milli finds no sign of Sunita, Jake or Emma. She gives the latter a call.

Milli: Hi. I reached that chapter on enchanting weapons with inscriptions. Ziggy's being no help at all, could you come in?
Emma: Sure... is Jake there?
Milli: Sorry, haven't seen him.

Margot steps out of the side office, holding a teacup. Escher arrives, talking on the phone.

Escher: I see, yes. About eleven... right. Thank you.
Milli: (as he shuts his phone off) We got the robbers.
Escher: Ah, splendid. By any chance did they have any loot from the museum?
Milli: No... just the sack of money...
Escher: That's odd. The museum was robbed last night, and one of the sacral chalices was stolen.
Milli: About eleven? We had them dusted by half-nine or so.
Escher: Probably a coincidence then. After all, the museum is well within the Shield. Still, it might be significant. The piece in question was used by a breakaway heretical cult founded by one Jacques DeVille, who claimed to have the powers of an angel, to move objects by looking at them, to see the future, and to read minds...
Ziggy: (looking up from a paper) What happened to him?
Escher: Burned at the stake, I think.
Ziggy: Aren't there any history books about people living long and happy lives?
Escher: Hmm... There is a book on the subject, actually.

He heads over to the stacks.

Escher: Oh. Damn.
Milli: Oh?
Escher: It's missing.
Milli: Damn.

Milli turns to Ziggy.

Milli: Oh you can not be serious! Good Lord! Could you grow up?
Ziggy: I do not have it.
Milli: Suuuure.
Ziggy: I did not take the library book. I did not take it with a hook. I did not take it with a bell. I did not take it back to Hell.
Escher: Well, someone did.
Milli: I thought you had this office locked?
Escher: I did.
William: I'll see if the main library has a copy.

Jake strolls in as William heads off.

Milli: Guess what happened today! A book got stolen!
Jake: Ziggy?
Milli: He says he doesn't have it. Anyway. Oh, Jake, you might wanna call Emma.
Jake: Why?
Milli: She's kinda worried.
Jake: Hm. Where's William going?
Escher: To see if the library copy is missing.
Jake: Right. I'll give him a hand.

Jack wanders in as Jake departs. Escher raises an eyebrow. Ziggy tuts and pulls out the book's index card.

Ziggy: Well, this and a little magic suggests it's still in the college.
Jack: Could Emma be more precise?
Milli: No. As it turns out, Ziggy's actually a big wizard.
Jack: No way...
Milli: Well, we'll get Jake to do it when he comes back.
Emma: He's not here?

As she enters.

Milli: No, he's here. He's over in the library. Has he called you?
Emma: No...

Ziggy: (quietly) What's up with her?
Milli: (quietly) She's all like mopey now.
Jack: (quietly) Wouldn't it piss you off?
Milli: (quietly) Why would it piss me off?
Jack: (quietly) If you were involved with Jake.
Milli: (quietly) I'm not.
Jack: (quietly) Imagine you were.
Milli: (quietly) I can't imagine being involved with Jake...

Meanwhile:

Jake: Hey, William. It's over in this stack, right?
William: Yeah.

Jake goes straight to the book, lifts it off the shelf, and opens it up...

William calls out the details for the book, and comes into the shelves. Jake hands him the book.

Jake: This it?
William: Yeah.
Jake: Cool, here you go. Oh, can I borrow your phone? I should call Emma, and mine isn't working.
William: Sure.

He takes it and heads out of the library.

Back at the office, Sunita enters, looking around warily, head down and hair forward to cover her face. She looks Emma in the shoes.

Mill looks at her watch. It's almost 9:45 and Sunita just arrived? Something must be wrong...

William looks at his watch, looks outside and sees no sign of Jake, then goes to find the book... finding it has had the vital pages torn out.

Milli: How's your head?
Sunita: Huh? My head?
Milli: That drink may have been stronger than I thought. Sorry.
Sunita: What? You spiked my drink?

Then the Sinister Figure's voice echoes in her head...

Sinister Voice: It's their fault! They bought you the drink.

She looks up, angry, her eyes red from crying.

Milli: Are you okay?
Sinister Voice: They're trying to discredit you. Get rid of you.

Sunita bursts into tears and runs into the side office. Milli hammers on the door.

Sunita: Go away!
Milli: What is it?
Sinister Voice: They don't like you, they just pretend.
Sunita: Look, I'm just... I've got work...

Milli and Ziggy open the door and step in. Sunita shuffles papers around valiantly and then bursts into tears.

Ziggy: You just got drunk, big deal!
Milli: You didn't embarrass yourself... nothing happened...
Sinister Voice: (in Milli's head) Ziggy was with her, alone...
Sunita: How could you do that?
Milli: What?
Sunita: I thought you all liked me, how could you... and how could he...

She gets up and pushes past them , then runs out of the office.

Margot blinks and chases after her.

Ziggy: Usually a hangover makes you quiet.
Milli: Maybe she's allergic? That would be in her file, right?
Ziggy: Give her some time to cool off.

Outside, Sunita cries on Margot's shoulder.

Milli: Think she's gonna be alright?
Ziggy: Watcher women are so tied up... I mean wound up. Wound.
Milli: You're so going for a kicking.
Ziggy: She kept touching me.
Milli: She really likes you.
Sinister Voice: (in Milli's head) And he's just winding her up.
Milli: And you're just winding her up. Like with that Bond villain thing.
Ziggy: I tried to be nice. I didn't even ask a lot of questions...
Sinister Voice: (in Milli's head) You know how he questioned Mac...
Ziggy: ... we just made small talk.
Milli: And you didn't say anything at all to upset her? For, what, three hours?
Sinister Voice: (in Milli's head) And how can you just let someone touch your knee seventy-five times?
Milli: She's not the type to get like this for no reason.
Ziggy: Maybe she is when she's drunk. You said she liked me. I can't stop that.
Milli: We got her drunk and left her there with you.
Sinister Voice: (in Milli's head) He even made you pay for the drink.
Milli: Well, next time you want to get some random girl drunk please don't get me to buy the drinks for you!

Escher comes back to find Milli and Ziggy glaring at each other, Emma looking on with a frown...

Milli: How about we... try and learn about this stolen chalice?
Escher: Right. Well, as I say, it was linked to the cult of Jacques DeVille.
Emma: DeVille?
Escher: Yes, what of it?
Emma: That's Jake's name.
Milli: It is? Jake DeVille? (quietly) Cool... I never knew, are you sure?
Emma: Yes...
Sinister Voice: (in Milli's head) She knows him soooo much better than you...

Emma: So who was this guy?
Escher: A cult leader. Supposedly able to read minds, move objects with his thoughts, foretell the future...
Ziggy: Are there any books on defending the mind against invasion?
Emma: Moving objects with his mind? Like... a psychic?
Jack: Yes, like Darth Vader.
Escher: You see, that one I recognise...
Milli: It's just a name.
Emma: Well, yes... but we went to that exhibit yesterday...

Milli: Okay, we should find Jake. He can help us find out who did this.
Emma: Um... right.

Leaving Emma looking troubled, Milli heads off to the library. There she finds William, looking at the gap in the Crusades bookshelf.

Milli: Is Jake here?
William: No, he took off. Borrowed my phone.

Milli tries to call it. It goes unanswered, lying broken at the bottom of a bin on top of the pages torn from the book...

Milli: We need to find Jake, see if he can help us.

Next she tries his room phone. No answer.

Jake stands there, watching it ring... then returns to spreading a circle of salt on the floor, around the chalice.

Jake looks up at a knock on the door. The camera notes his eyes, now brown and bloodshot. He pauses, blinks, and his eyes become Jake's again as he opens it. Then, seeing who it is, he relaxes and they turn dark again.

Thomas Roots stands there, leaning casually against the doorframe.

Thomas: Good morning, Jake... isn't it?

When Jake answers, his voice isn't his own. It sounds like the Sinister Figure's actually.

Jacques: In a way. What do you want?
Thomas: Yes. I believe that you... well, that you have a secret.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

05-05-2004, 07:42 PM

Thomas looks over the living room, cleared out apart from the salt circle and two chairs.

Jacques: What do you have to offer me?
Thomas: I imagine this will be... messy.
Jacques: That it will.
Thomas: Deliver my brother to us unharmed, and we can ensure that you get away... clean. Here. My card.
Jacques: You can expect a call from me very soon.

Thomas smiles and shakes Jake's... Jacques's hand.

William turns off the office computer.

William: DeVille could "move objects with his mind, see the future, read the minds of men". DeVille's cult was wiped out in the Albigensian Crusade, after the Crusaders trapped them in their church and burned it down. DeVille himself escaped when a window exploded outwards and he walked out, with the fire dying around him. But the Crusaders had a brace of archers waiting. Then their leader beheaded him and threw the body back into the fire.
Escher: And Jake's file shows that he may have inherited his power from his family, which comes from Toulouse. And that his real name is Jackson De... something.
Milli: De-something?
Escher: The fax is smudged.

Jack: Okay, here's the plan. Find out where he is. Try his room first. Then Milli, set a fire.
Milli: Uh, why?
Jack: If it's him, he's afraid of fire. Okay, how about you set off the fire alarm?
Milli: Why me?
Jack: He can only read men's minds.
Milli: I don't think that the medieval scholars meant that literally. They probably just thought women didn't count...
Jack: Well, anyway, if he comes out, we're ready with crossbows...
Milli: No fires. No brace of archers. No cutting Jake's head off!
Jack: But he may be evil.
Emma: He has been acting strangely...
Milli: It's just a name. You've been hanging out with Jack too much.
Ziggy: Family can be... you've met my family.
Milli: Have you met my family?
Ziggy: Your name doesn't come up in connection to major mystical bad guys.

Sunita appears back at the door, looking determined and then realises that Jake is not in the office and starts to lose her resolve.

Sunita: Is... is Jake here?
Milli: Uh, no... I'm just off to see him, see if he can help us find the stolen cup thing.
Sunita: I need to talk to him as well.
Jacques: (in Sunita's head) You shouldn't run off angry. You should calm down. Think things through. Maybe have some tea.
Sunita: (muttered mostly to herself) I should probably take a moment to calm down though. Perhaps a cup of tea to get things straight in my head?

Milli: Are you alright? You've been a bit quiet.
Ziggy: It's okay. Just a little upset about that spat we had. That's all. Nothing major.
Milli: ... wait. What?
Ziggy: (stiffens) Nothing.
Milli: No... what did you just say?

Mill tilts her head curiously.

Ziggy: Nothing major?
Milli: Before that.
Ziggy: That's all.

Milli stares at him.

Ziggy: You should probably go look for Jake or something.
Milli: Rrrr-ight.

Mill shakes her head and makes for the door. Once outside, and out of earshot, her phone rings. Jake's landline.

Jake: Milli, quick, you gotta come over here...
Milli: What is it?
Jake: Are you alone?
Milli: Yeah.
Jake: Something's going on. Something's messing with my head. I'm not in control!
Milli: Should I get Ziggy, or Emma?
Jake: No! You know what Ziggy's like, I can't trust him... You're the only one I can trust. And that whole thing with Emma - that wasn't me!
Milli: It... it wasn't?
Jake: I don't love Emma... It's you.

Milli blinks in disbelief.

Milli: Um... Wh... what?
Jake: Just... get over here. I need your help. Quickly!

And Milli runs all the way.

Jake pulls her inside quickly, looking nervous.

Jake: I need your help with a ritual. I need someone else to help with casting. We need salt. I'll get the candles.
Milli: Salt?
Jake: Kitchen.

Then the fire alarm rings. Milli comes back out as Jake looks confused.

Jake: What's that?
Milli: Oh, God, it's Jack. He's convinced that if he sets a fire you'll run out and then he wants to cut your head off.
Jake: Er...

Outside, Jack and Andy look up.

Andy: How long is this supposed to take?

Milli: This thing was stolen, it belonged to some guy DeVille and Emma says that's your name... She knows you so much better... And you have the same surname so you must be evil.
Jake:... Do you think I'm evil?
Milli: No. I know you're not.
Jake: As long as you believe in me...
Milli: I do.

And Sunita arrives just in time to see Jake giving Milli a hug silhouetted in the window.

Jake: Oh, thank God... lock the door. If Jack's got a stupid idea he could interrupt the ritual and then... I dunno what.
Milli: (locking the door) What next?
Jake: Sit there. The ritual's in the book. I just need something else.

Milli: So... uh... what do I do with the book?
Jake: Just hold it for me. Sit there.

Milli looks at Jake quizzically. He stares back, his gaze emotionless, and Milli's eyes widen almost imperceptibly and she subtly reaches for her bracelet. He smiles, a thin sort of smile. He heads into the bedroom, as Milli sits with her back to it. She touches her wrist, looks down and finds the bracelet missing.

Flashback to Jake palming it as he pulled her inside.

He comes back in, carrying a hogtied and unconscious Charlotte over his shoulder.

Jake: I just want to thank you for coming to help.

His eyes darken and his voice changes.

Jacques: Turns out the blood of one isn't enough.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

05-05-2004, 07:45 PM

Milli tries to leap to her feet, and slams against an invisible wall of force pinning her to the chair.

Jacques: Like I'd really let you move.

Ziggy looks up suddenly, gets up and runs out of the office. Escher, William and Emma follow.

Emma: What's going on?
Ziggy: Trouble!

Milli keeps struggling as Jacques sets Charlotte down in front of her, casually drops the bracelet just out of reach, and brings out the chalice.

Jacques: You know what the sick thing is?
Milli: You're really Jake?
Jacques: In some ways, yes. The sick thing is, it really is you! But still...

He retrieves a dagger from Milli's jacket and stands over Charlotte.

Milli: Don't hurt her!
Jacques: She won't feel a thing...
Milli: Take me, not her!
Jacques: ... Fine.

Then Ziggy blasts the door open and everyone charges in.

Jacques: Oh look, the cavalry's here.

Jack jumps to tackle him, and swerves in mid air and slams into a wall.

Jacques: Oh, Andy, how stressful does it have to be?

... as he points to a pile of books and they rise off the floor and smack Andy around the head. He drops to his knees, trembling, growling.

Andy: No... not... now!
Ziggy: Control it, man, you can control it!
Jacques: (in Andy's head) Why do you need control? Go wild! Be free!
Andy: Nnnrrrrraaaarrr…
Ziggy: Sleep.

Ziggy's eyes go black and Andy slumps over. Jacques tuts and Andy gets up again, snarling. Jack stumbles over and punches him in the face, knocking him back down.

William runs forwards to drag Charlotte away. Jacques doesn't seem bothered.

Escher levels his crossbow. Jacques grins.

Jacques: Oh, you'd love to take him out, wouldn't you? He's messing with your little girl. Nobody gets to touch her but you, right?

Escher's finger tightens on the trigger, knuckles whitening with anger.

Jacques: You couldn't save the last one, what makes you think you can save this one!? Go on, try, shoot him! That would make things easier for you, wouldn't it! That would make you happy!

Milli shouts to Escher.

Milli: Don't hurt him!

Escher looks over, anger replaced by uncertainty, and then the bolt goes flying into the ceiling as Jack barges into Escher and knocks him over.

Sunita runs in and stands in the door, mouth hanging open in disbelief.

Emma backs up against the wall, eyes filling with tears, swatting weakly at the objects spinning around her. All things she's left in Jake's room.

Milli: Ziggy -

Then Ziggy lets rip. Lightning arcs across the room. Jacques staggers, but replies in kind. Objects whirl, spin, smash against walls. Ziggy doesn't flinch.

Jacques: Just like your old man, eh!
Milli: STOP!

Jacques looks down at her and smirks, then hauls her to her feet, putting her knife to her throat. They start to float off the floor.

She stares defiantly at him, her eyes blazing.

Jacques: How sweet. I can see what he sees in you...

Ziggy starts to mutter under his breath.

His grip on the knife tightens, then he blinks - eyes flickering between Jacques's dark and Jake's grey-green.

Jake: Mi -
Milli: Jake?

He grimaces, and his eyes turn dark again - and he kisses Milli.

Ziggy concentrates, eyes narrowed, as he finishes the incantation.

And the kiss, at first forceful, turns soft and unbearably gentle.

Milli pulls back and sees Jake open his eyes. A look of sheer horror and guilt. He collapses to the floor, drained and shivering.

The objects swirling around the room crash to the floor.

Emma huddles in the corner, crying uncontrollably. Milli staggers over to help her up.

Milli: Are you okay?

Emma doesn't answer, she just looks up at her.

Jack: So do we want an axe to cut -
Ziggy: (rolling his eyes) Oh, go to sleep.

Jack passes out just as Andy rolls over, groaning.

Andy: Ow... who hit me, I'll...
Milli: Andy! Down!
Andy: Sorry... I'm sorry. I couldn't control myself.
Escher: You weren't the only one.
Milli: Yeah...

Escher looks up at the crossbow bolt in the ceiling, then pulls it out, turning to look down at Jake, curled up on the floor, rocking slightly.

Milli: Emma? Are you okay?
Emma: N-no.
Milli: I'm sorry. But we're gonna need a hand making sure Jake's okay.
Ziggy: I won't.

His eyes are still black...

Milli: (quickly to Ziggy) You will.
Ziggy: Fine... (trying to sound convincing) Emma, I'll need your help with this.
Milli: (back to Emma, gently) Last night, that wasn't him.
Emma: Since... since when? I mean, how long?
Milli: It happened after the fight in the scrapyard.
Emma: (hopefully, wanting to be convinced) You... you think?
Milli: (forcefully) Yes.

Ziggy: Michael. Ever taken part in an exorcism?
Escher: Once.
Ziggy: Get the book, then. Time for an encore.

William gets Charlotte away, unties her, and calls an ambulance when he sees the welt on her head. Escher and Sunita go to prepare an exorcism just to be sure. Andy drags Jack out of the way. Ziggy looks after Emma. And Milli retrieves her bracelet and knife and slips off in the confusion, unnoticed.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

05-05-2004, 07:52 PM

Jake sits on the bed, head bowed, as Escher blows out a white candle.

Sunita: Has it worked?
Escher: The possessing force has gone. Now that I know his actual name and have seen the correct file... it would appear to have been his ancestor's spirit. Able to possess a male descendant, or be driven out and have to wait another generation...
Emma: So he's okay?
Ziggy: In that way, anyway.

And with a nod, Emma leaves. Jake looks up slightly as she goes, with Sunita leaving next after giving her a head start. Escher pauses at the door and goes, leaving Jake and Ziggy alone.

Jake: What have I done?
Ziggy: Nothing. Wasn't you.
Jake: Oh... here's your brother's card.

Jake hands Ziggy the card, Thomas has given him. Ziggy hesitates for a second before taking it and putting it into his coat pocket.

Jake: How much of it wasn't me? I was still in there.
Ziggy: Everyone has their weak moments. I'm not blaming you for anything he did. I know what happened the last few days wasn’t really you. I know that this is the real you.

And with that, he punches Jake in the jaw.

Ziggy: Now this is going to be a new experience for you, so listen up. You lost your chance. You do not get the girl, you do not ride into the sunset. You had enough time making up your mind, figuring out what it is you want. But it’s over now. She wants to move on. So let her. She deserves that much.

Jack catches up to Escher as he walks away with shoulders slumped.

Jack: Had you met that thing before?
Escher: Hm? No...
Jack: He said "you couldn't save the other one".
Escher: (flatly) That's not what he meant.
Jack: Oh, what did -
Escher: (flatly) Go home, Jack.

And he carries on, leaving Jack behind.

Jake looks around his room.

Jake: I think I want to move. Maybe blame the plumbing. I just... can't stay here.
Ziggy: If you insist.

Milli leaves Escher's office with a stack of books on enchanted weapons, and dumps her bags at the door of Anne, who sits next to her in Modern Philosophy and who she otherwise barely speaks to.

Anne: Er... hello? Uh, Millicent?
Milli: Hi. I need somewhere to crash for a few days. I'll be very quiet, and I'll clean up.
Anne: Uh... um...

Jake visits Emma that night.

Jake: Can we talk? About what happened... Words can't express how sorry I am. I mean, I can't forgive myself for what I've done. And I understand if you don't want to -
Emma: How long?
Jake: Huh?
Emma: You don't have anything to apologise for while he was... it was there. But how long were you away?
Jake: The whole day before. Two days.
Emma: So... that wasn't you talking to me last night.
Jake: ... No.
Emma: I'm... going to need some time.
Jake: ... Okay. Um. I should probably...
Emma: Yeah.

Two days later, Milli visits Jake's flat, and finds it empty.

She checks in on Escher, and finds him twisting his wedding ring around his finger as he works his way through a bottle of scotch.

Milli: Hey. Um... can I get the... are you okay?
Escher: I will be. You?
Milli: I will be. Could I get the spare key to the practice room? I just... need somewhere to be.
Escher: Of course.
Milli: I'll be back Monday week, if nothing comes up.
Escher: Alright.
Milli: And I never want to be that helpless again. So if I want to learn magic, or anything, I don't want to hear I shouldn't.
Escher: Then I have nothing to say.

He puts a hand on her shoulder as he gives her the key. She looks away.

Milli: I looked in his room. He's left.
Escher: No. I believe he's staying at Andy's for the time being. Andy's away... hunting, I think.
Milli: Right. And... we can't hold anything to him. So stop drinking.
Escher: I will.

He looks down at his wedding ring.

Milli: It wasn't your fault.
Escher: When I saw what he was doing... heard what he said...
Milli: I know.

He turns the glass upside down and sets it down.

That night, Ziggy texts Jake.

Ziggy: At the pub. Come along.

Jake: Well, I think I pretty much got rid of every girl who cared. Emma wants some time. Can't blame her.
Ziggy: You okay?
Jake: Not my choice.
Ziggy: That wasn't my question. Are you okay?
Jake: Is it my round?
Ziggy: Fine. Avoidance it is then. If it's any consolation, there's no bad blood between us.
Jake: You said before... you said before, if the way was clear... It's clear. Bridges are burned, door's closed.
Ziggy: Right. Anyway, I'm still here. Should count for something.
Jake: I still owe ya a punch.
Ziggy: All in good time. How are you going to mend things with Escher... Andy, William...
Jake: Good question. I owe William... I mean, I broke his phone.

They smile weakly.

Ziggy: I'll call him.
Jake: You better. I don't have a phone...

Milli calls Jake at Andy's flat.

Milli: Hi... Ehm... I'm...
Jake: Look, I'm really sorry.
Milli: Don't. Just... don't...
Jake: I have to.
Milli: I'm just calling to say... that day never happened at all.
Jake: It was two days.
Milli: That day never happened. And, uh... I... umm... y'know... it's kinda weird when something like that happens between friends.
Jake: Are we friends?
Milli: Course.
Jake: Friends... I understand.

Milli: It's just weird cause we kinda hang around... y'know... listen, I'm not going to be around for a couple days.
Jake: Right.
Milli: Because, y'know, after that day, I need a couple days. But when I get back, everything will be normal and fine.
Jake: I don't think anything will be normal or fine. With us... or anyone else...
Milli: Yes, it will.
Jake: We split up.
Milli: Oh. Oh God. I didn't know. I'm really sorry. How is she?
Jake: I dunno. She's not speaking to me.
Milli: Oh. Right. Bollocks... I'll sort it out.
Jake: Don't... it's not your fault. It was mine. It wasn't me, but... He could tap in to everything I knew... He used the truth against you, to hurt you.
Milli: Use the... truth?

Milli falls silent for a moment.

Milli: Oh. Right. That truth. Anyway... um... I'm gonna head out and stuff. I'll see you in a few days. And everything will be fine and back to normal.
Jake: It won't.
Milli: (insistently) Everything will be fine and back to normal.
Jake: No, it won't. You're not listening, you're doing what you always do, and hearing what you want to hear. If that's how it is then fine. We're friends. Just friends. I understand. But Milli... (pause) thanks... for saving me. You brought me back.
Milli: Right. Yeah. Bye.

With that, she hangs up. She packs her overnight bag.

Milli: Okay. I should get going. Thanks for letting me stay.
Anne: Oh... uh... okay. I guess you don't want a cup of coffee then...

This done, she goes to see Emma. Em's eyes are red from crying, but she tries to keep her head up high.

Milli: How are you?
Emma: I've been better.
Milli: Look, I've been reading up on enchanted weapons, and I could do with your help.
Emma: ... thanks.
Milli: And... if you don't mind, I could do with somewhere to stay.
Emma: Sure.

And Pearl Jam's Last Kiss plays softly as the camera drifts away from Emma and Milli sharing a sad smile, then Emma starting to cry again and Milli awkwardly putting an arm around her... to Jack sitting apart from the rugby team, brooding... to William frowning as he watches Charlotte wince looking at her bruises... to Margot sitting on Sunita's bed glumly watching her pack, then stop and unpack... to Andy glaring at the waning moon... to Ziggy reading an occult tome, looking up, scowling, then hurling the book across the room in anger... to Escher setting down the black-framed photograph of his wife and sobbing... to Jake sitting alone in his new room, staring blankly into a mirror.

Fade to black.

CREDITS!

Jake and Ziggy sitting in the pub. Both slightly drunk and looking at somebody off-screen.

Jake: Black.
Ziggy: Red.

They stare for a second. Then we hear a surprised shriek of a girl, followed by applause in the pub.

Ziggy: Hmm... white.
Jake: It is a classic, after all.

They both down a shot of tequila, then turn around to look at somebody else.

Jake: White.
Ziggy: Black.

... Another shriek.
GRR! ARG!

Craig Oxbrow

05-05-2004, 07:53 PM

Escher V/O: Next time, on The Watch House:

Quentin Travers looking suspiciously at Ziggy.
Emma looking away as Jake comes into the office.
Margot watching five women pace around the room.
Milli screaming as she stabs something overhead with a sword.
Adelia sitting unnoticed as the group talk in the pub, smiling to herself.
Adelia face to face with Milli, as she draws a knife...

Escher V/O: The next episode of The Watch House is Magic Tricks.

--
Actual Play bit:

Cat: Oh my God! Was that "credits"?
Craig: The trick is not to let the PCs talk at all before them.

The Evil Jake episode was pretty much all the idea of Jake's player. I threw in the B-plot to keep the group busy before the mayhem started in earnest, and the twist visit by Thomas. (Which thankfully got me some appreciation for my episode writing skills.)

This session started late, ran for two and a half hours, and then stayed in the pub for the same again.

Next up, a very straightforward "advance the season plot" episode, complete with added emotional fallout from this week.

Then the week after that... hoo boy.

morgue

05-06-2004, 01:47 AM

Originally posted by Craig Oxbrow
Jack: So, like most women and Ziggy. Like you and Ziggy.
Milli: Except she likes him.
Jack: And you don't...
Milli: No, I mean, well...

Jack nails it SHOCK! Pictures at eleven!

Cool, cool ep.

Craig Oxbrow

05-06-2004, 08:05 AM

Well, everybody gets things right occasionally. :p

thenewgirl

05-06-2004, 07:01 PM

I love this game. I have made a list of my favourite quotes from the last couple of episodes.

Ziggy: Maybe they can make some edible dynamite!
Milli: (angrily) Only if you eat it.

Valet: And your bag, miss?
Milli: I'll keep it with me.
Her book bag clinks slightly, being full of weapons...

Milli: (deadpan) Happy other worlds full of pineapple trees and hula girls obviously.
Sunita: Well, that's a start.
Milli: (to Escher) Why is she still here?
Escher: (quietly) Not my decision.

Sunita: Of course. If we can sit and make out a full report...
Milli: Yeah, can you specify I want red roses, instead of pink. What should I put on my gravestone?
Jake: I think I'll be cremated.

And after several hours, Milli looks up at the clock, and notices it's past midnight. She looks back down.
Milli: (quietly) This really isn't how I wanted to celebrate my birthday...

Ziggy: Which is why I won't do it. It could kill you.
Milli: I'm willing to take that chance.
Ziggy: I'm not.
Milli: Look, this has to work. There's no point putting a Fisher-Price spell on it.

He opens it slightly, so that only Milli can see it's actually hollow, containing six silver shuriken with space for more weapons.
Milli: Oh, I thought it was just a book, but...
She notices Charlotte leaning in to get a look.
Milli: It's a first edition!
And she grins as she closes it, very quickly.

Milli: It's running!
Jake: We'll get it.
Milli: It's my birthday!
Jake: Well, then, we'll... hold it for you?

In the garden, Milli tries to punch the demon and misses as it finally falls over when Jake grabs its ankles.
Milli: Where'd it go? Oh. I kicked it. Go me!

Milli: Look at that, they're collapsing into purple ook. I hope I haven't got any on my shoes. Did you see my knife? It's really pretty. Mmm, I could have another brownie.
Jake: (standing unsteadily) How many of my brownies have you had?
Milli: Three. Why? They were really good. Ooh, I feel nauseous.
Jake: Uh... no reason.

Milli: I wonder whose jacket that was.
Lisa: So this is what you do, huh?
Milli: Pretty much. We do what we have to do. We fight. We keep watch.
Lisa: Cool. Is there any more cake?

Ziggy: I did not take the library book. I did not take it with a hook. I did not take it with a bell. I did not take it back to Hell.

Milli: (insistently) Everything will be fine and back to normal.

I also really loved the interaction between Milli and Lisa. Their relationship worked brilliantly.

Thanks for another great read!

The Architect

05-07-2004, 01:01 AM

Is it just me or has Jack been elevated beyond occaisional tough and comedy at his expense? He seemed serious, on-the-ball and effective this episode.

Craig Oxbrow

05-07-2004, 04:41 AM

Originally posted by The Architect
Is it just me or has Jack been elevated beyond occasional tough and comedy at his expense? He seemed serious, on-the-ball and effective this episode. Somewhat, yeah. That's the (newly returned) player's action, of course.

Also, aw shucks. I'm sure tpo Milli will be rather pleased with that list.

Coffee_Lifeform

05-07-2004, 12:46 PM

Originally posted by thenewgirl
I love this game. I have made a list of my favourite quotes from the last couple of episodes.

...

Thanks for another great read!

Someone quoted *me*!!! No-one *ever* quotes me!!

Wohoo!!

*does a happy little dance of joy*

Craig Oxbrow

05-07-2004, 07:06 PM

Craig Oxbrow

05-09-2004, 05:47 PM

The Watch House 2.11: Magic Tricks

Milli: punkette Watcher trainee feeling guilty about kissing Jake despite massive extenuating circumstances
Ziggy: badass sorcerer and son of supervillain, genuinely concerned about Milli
Jake: psychic civilian currently feeling rather guilty and lost
William: Mister Watcher Trainee
Andy: quiet unassuming hereditary lycanthrope, in control, oh yeah, you betcha
Sunita: Watchers' Council very proper teaching assistant
Jack: rugby-playing civilian, fallen back in with the Watch

(NPC)
Escher: dour but fatherly Watchers' trainer
Emma: Jake's broken-hearted spellcasting ex
Margot: Watchers' Council fairly slapdash teaching assistant
Travers: Master of Security for the Watchers' Council
Adelia: Ziggy's sister, reportedly evil
Thomas: Ziggy's brother, decidedly evil
Fiona: Watchers' allied coven leader
Luna: coven junior member

Previously, on The Watch House:

Emma screaming as Skel tears through the mystical barrier she created. Milli's attacks bouncing off his own ward.

Benjamin Roots looking at the book Milli is reading.
Benjamin: "On the Enchantment of Weapons and their usage in combat against Mystical Barriers."

Roots killing Skel.
Ziggy: My family are... well, they're evil.

Jake being possessed, charming Emma, hypnotising and kissing Sunita and kissing Milli.

Emma in tears.
Jake: We split up.
Milli: Oh. Right. Bollocks... I'll sort it out.

Milli: Look, I've been reading up on enchanted weapons, and I could do with your help.
Emma: ... thanks.

--

We open in the practice room. Milli unsheathes a short sword, spinning it around in her hand and looking at an inscription on the side, a swirling pattern of letters. Then she adjusts her grip for combat, looks up and narrows her eyes at her target. A life-sized cardboard cutout of a cartoon Dracula.

Sitting off to the side, huddling in a sweater, with her hair pulled back and no makeup on, Emma reminds her:

Emma: Now this is just a test run. See how it works with just the book magic.

Mumbling something, she raises her hands and an effect like a heatwave surrounds the cutout. Milli charges, kicks at the barrier, gets close enough to shift the cutout before bouncing off, then brings up the sword - scythes right through it and takes the Count's head clean off.

Emma: Seems to work.
Milli: Excellent.
Emma: Okay, good. And I've got some of the anti-barrier powder left over. It stays good for a whole month, apparently.
Milli: Good. Thanks.
Emma: Now let's see if Ziggy or somebody's around so we can get it powered up.

With that, they head over to Escher's office... where five women sit in a circle, chanting, as candles float in the air around them and the smoke weaves a pattern through the room...

Emma: Oh-kay, I'm thinking maybe we can...

CREDITS!

Craig Oxbrow

05-09-2004, 06:00 PM

The candles come in to land. Margot steps out of the stacks where she was hiding. Milli redraws her sword. The five women stand and pace out the room. Escher looks up from studiously ignoring the whole thing as the leader of the five, Fiona Bartendale (Alex Kingston (http://www.erfansite.hpg.ig.com.br/fotos/fotoak/alex05.jpg) looking like Home Counties gentry) clears her throat.

Fiona: So, this warding issue you've been having. We should be done in time for dinner.
Escher: Oh, good.
Fiona: Clearly had the cowboys in here...

Emma stiffens as she hears this.

Milli: Hey, being a cowboy's cool. You get to wear boots, and a hat, and a belt with guns. Uh, and jeans. Or a denim skirt. Well, not as a cow-boy.

Escher: Ahem. Ms. Bartendale, Millicent Blackhurst and Emily Radcliffe. Milli, Emma, Fiona Bartendale and her coven.
Fiona: Ah, Miss Radcliffe. Quite adept as a book caster, I hear.

Fiona smiles unconvincingly. Emma looks at her shoes.

Milli: Yes, she's good. Really good. Really. Good.

Fiona: Still, this level of mystic threat isn't to be expected. Haven't seen an out-and-out sorcerous attack since, oh, Professor James's day. Lucky you had any warding in place at all.

The younger woman on Fiona's left, Luna Perkins (Emma Pierson (http://www.bomscans.com/samples/bsEmmaPierson040413007.jpg) in a sweater and scruffy jeans) speaks up.

Luna: We've built the spell to stack with the Shield. It doesn't draw any power away from it, it runs off the ambient thaumokinetic energy levels of the surrounding area. There are more available leylines, we're just tapping the nearest.
Milli: Well, that makes things clearer.

Milli and Emma share a look. Milli rolls her eyes and Emma shrugs.

Fiona: You'll have to forgive Luna. She's working on her degree in Environmental Science.
Luna: Sorry Ms. Bartendale. Um, but, anyway, we're just installing the feedback compensator incantations. We shouldn't see another blowout. Even if someone really gross comes along and smacks the ward down, we won't get headaches. Of course, you'll be busy fighting Morgan le Fay or something, so that probably won't be high on your list of priorities, but it's best to be sure.
Milli: (confused) Uh, um... right. Of course...
Luna: Now, um, we'll give you a debug report to fill in, in case it sees active use...
Fiona: For pity's sake, Luna, just put the tea on. We'll be here all night as it is.

Milli: So, while you're here, can I get some study help with defensive magic? Counterspells and the like? I've just had a really bad run of really bad people using magic on me. And I'm a really good student. I'm a girl as well. That's good with the empowerment and sisterhood and all.
Luna: Girl power!

Milli: Huh?
Fiona: Ahem. Well, clearly you've been looking into this, judging by the energy spirals bound into your sword... May I?
Milli: Emma made it.
Fiona: (condescendingly) Well done!

Emma nods slightly and gives Milli a look of rather glum thanks for sticking up for her.

Milli: But, yeah, I want something that I can go "boom, there goes your shield!"
Fiona: Well, that depends on the kind of shield you want to, er, boom.

Andy and Ziggy come in. Jake notably doesn't.

Luna: So, lycanthropic huh? Um, ever considered looking into a cure for that?
Andy: Uh, no, it's an ancient family curse going back generations, so if there was a cure...
Luna: Well, it does involve stabbing you in the head three times with an enchanted silver dagger, but it's survivable. In theory.
Andy: I'll give it a miss.
Milli: I've got a really nice silver letter opener.
Andy: Nah, you're alright, thanks... I mean, I don't have to turn, even at full moon. I'm in control...

He manages to make this sound like a pickup line rather than a desperate attempt to convince himself...

Ziggy wanders by and picks up a book. Milli grabs it back.

Ziggy: What? This is an educational establishment!
Milli: You're not allowed to look at these books. You plus books equals bad. If you want something to read go to the library.
Emma: (quietly) But we need him to -
Milli: Luna can do it.
Luna: I can! Wait, what can I do?

Ziggy: Oh-kay. Clearly we're in our happy place again. (turns to Escher) Mister Escher, do you mind if I look at books?
Milli: The ones he's not to look at?
Escher: Well -
Ziggy: I just want to look up warding spells.
Escher: They're all over the desk.
Ziggy: Okay, enchanting weapons?
Escher: Milli? You checked them out.
Milli: We've been working for a couple weeks now. How about this book on the history of the use of standing stones?
Luna: Actually, we need that...
Ziggy: I think I'll go watch that Yes Minister omnibus...

Milli shakes her head as Ziggy leaves, then goes back to quizzing Fiona and Luna.

Milli: I just need something to help in case someone does something like pinning me somewhere.
Luna: Well, every form of binding spell has a different counterspell. A real adept could come up with something on the fly, but otherwise...
Fiona: We'd be glad to teach you, if you have a few years.
Milli: I may not even have a few days...

Ziggy calls Jake.

Ziggy: Escher has his Feng Shui group in.
Jake: Looks like he might be a bit distracted, if he's busy?
Ziggy: Seven letters, last one F, something really fast...
Jake: Huh?
Ziggy: He's doing his crossword.
Jake: I'll leave him alone with his friends.
Ziggy: And Milli and Emma are making a magic sword.
Jake: They okay?
Ziggy: There's nobody standing between them.
Jake: How's William doing? Haven't had a chance to talk to him yet.

William comes out of the stacks, looks over Escher's shoulder and points out a clue.

Ziggy: He seems okay...

Time passes. Milli asks the coven questions about common factors in shielding and holding spells. Emma tries to answer them as well. Sunita stays in the side office and catches up on her filing, like she has been for the last twelve days. Jack and Andy go to the practice room and test their relative strengths, which results in Jack punching Andy in the stomach, Andy snarling and flinging him across the room, then folding up and groaning. Ziggy reads. Jake stays away.

Eventually it gets dark, and most of the group return to look at possibly patrolling.

Jack: So is there anything to do?
Milli: I know what you're meant to be doing? You don't have lectures? Other friends?
Jack: Any records of big evil things, psychic phenomena... stolen cars?
William: We finished the crossword.

Fiona: Now, that should be everything. Luna will stay around for, ahem, "tech support" and I'll discuss the arrangements with Mister Travers.
Escher: Travers is coming here?
Fiona: Yes, he's arriving tomorrow. He didn't tell you?
No...
Luna: Um... well, anyhoo, let's go for a final system check... (closes her eyes and concentrates, then opens one and looks around) Huh. Power signal's kinda lossy. I think something else is tapping into the same leyline.
Ziggy: Sorry, it's my Megadrive.
Fiona: (ponders) Hmm. Something around Trinity College. You might want to, I don't know, saddle up. Or however you Watcher types put it.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

05-09-2004, 06:03 PM

Milli: I'll just stick around here.
Jack: Have we got devices to measure magical activity?
Ziggy: Like PKE meters in Ghostbusters?
Jack: (enthusiastic) Yeah!
Ziggy: (deadpan) No.
Milli: William, maybe you can invent one.
William: Hmm. Might be a good project for the summer...

Ziggy calls Jake. As he arrives, Emma suddenly finds something very interesting at the bottom of the page she happened to be looking at.

Ziggy: So, coffee then? Milk, sugar, cyanide?

Escher nods curtly. Milli looks up slightly and returns to reading.

Jake: Hey Will.
William: ... Hey.

Silence.

Ziggy: So... I think Yes Minister is more relevant culturally than Yes Prime Minister.
Andy: I would agree!

Milli and Emma go back to taking notes.

Jake: Okay... so, who's going?
Fiona: Well, you need someone who can sense magical energy residues.
Luna: I can go!
Emma: So can I!
Ziggy: I can do that.
Fiona: Ah, yes. I've heard about you.
Ziggy: Why does everybody have a file on me? This is so not fair... So, Jake, how about we check out some ley lines?
Andy: Be vewwy quiet, I'm hunting wey wines!
(DP for cracking up the group)

William: Milli?
Milli: No, I'm gonna stay here.
William: What?
Milli: I mean, it's just a patrol. And I can't see or do the magic anyway. I have to work on this.
William: Um... okay.

Luna: So, who all's going?
Emma: Well, we should probably go in two groups. (looks over at Jake)
Jake: Uh, right.

Jack: Well, we take one detecting person each. If they only see psychic things, things like walls can get in the way.
Emma: You mean we'll walk into walls if you're not there?
Jack: Uh, no, that's not what I mean... er... What if we run into a big evil thing that's immune to big evil sorcery?
Milli: Nothing's immune to big evil sorcery.
Emma: He was. (pointing at Jake)
Ziggy: Why are we still here? Why are we listening to Jack? When's the next plane to Lapland?

William starts to drag Jack out the door.

Milli: Damn it, aren't you gone yet?

Andy goes to get a dowsing rod.

Jake: I'll stay here.
Milli: You should go, in case they come across something.
Jake: Emma doesn't want me there.
Milli: Emma doesn't have a problem with you going.
Jake: She'll be distracted, she won't find anything.
Milli: Then she can stay.
Jake: I was really wanting to have a word with Escher anyway.
Milli: Cool. Okay then.

Milli glances over as Jake approaches Escher, then returns to her reading.

Jake: Ummm, hey. Can we have a chat?
Escher: ... Of course.
Jake: About what happened. I just want to say I'm sorry. For everything... I know we haven't been on the best of terms recently. But the things that came out my mouth were hurtful. I just want you to know that I don't believe any of them...
Escher: I know. (looks away) And, ah, I'm sorry for my reaction...

Ziggy scopes out the Trinity College library, nodding slightly.

Jack: Luna said there was a powerful tapping power thing.
Ziggy: She didn't say "powerful"...
Luna: I dunno, looks like fairly generic summoning to me.
Emma: Can you tell what?
Luna: Nothing too big. Of course, "nothing too big" could still be half a dozen demons with the strength of five people each. I imagine it'll show up, though...
Ziggy: You think?

Ziggy: So, in the library itself. Find out who was in there after hours, maybe who had keys.
William: It being near exam time, that could be a fairly long list... I'll get it, get me a pint when you go to the pub.

Sunita looks out of the side room, sees Jake and starts to lean back in...

Milli: Hey, long time no see.
Sunita: Er, yes. Filing. Needs to be done.

Jake goes for a smoke.

Sunita: So, yes, Milli...
Milli: Yeah, where've you been?
Sunita: In there.
Milli: For two weeks?
Sunita: So, an enchanted sword?
Milli: Uh, yes. And I'm working on spells to stop people stopping me moving.

Rather than going to the pub, Ziggy heads back to the office. He finds Jake outside, toying with his lighter.

Jake: Kinda crowded in there...

He nods and heads inside, seeing Sunita talking to Fiona.

Sunita: Tea, coffee?
Fiona: Some water for my own herbal blend. It clears the palette and focuses the mind.

And meanwhile at the pub, over general hubbub and Echobelly:

Luna: Oh, don't worry about Woney. She just likes to act the big Witch-Queen when she's on duty. Thinks we should be terribly professional around Watchers - ooh, can I get a packet of crisps?

The camera tracks back from Andy, Jack and Luna to Adelia sitting in the next booth, smiling.

Ziggy: Looks like there was some kind of summoning ritual in the Trinity library.
Escher: Wouldn't be the first time.
Ziggy: I'd need a few hours alone in there to work out what it was exactly. Chalk drawing, chanting in Sanskrit, any volunteers?
Milli: I really don't have time. I'm trying to get as much use as I can out of the coven while they're here.
Sunita: Did you say Sanskrit? It's been a few years, might be a little rusty...
Escher: What do you really need?
Ziggy: ... Half an hour to look around.

Jake comes back in. Sunita's hands tremble and she looks for somewhere to put down her tray of coffee and tea. Everyone nearby grabs their cup. Jake stands in the doorway looking uncomfortable. Emma hides behind her cup.

Su breezes right past Jake to help Ziggy.

Ziggy: (to Jake) What did you do?

Jake follows Sunita towards the stacks.

Jake: Can I have a word?
Sunita: Maybe later. Very busy.
Jake: About what happened.
Sunita: I know. It wasn't you.
Jake: And what he said... we do like you. We're not trying to get rid of you. That was just a trick.
Sunita: Yes. Just a trick. I know.
Jake: It's been great to have you here.

Sunita hits a dead end and is forced to stop. She loses her fragile composure and whirls around.

Sunita: But don't you see? It wasn't you but it WAS me! I just -

She rushes past him and off towards the exit, a distraught Jake not far behind. He grabs her gently by
the shoulders and turns her round to face him.

Jake: But... I... but... It wasn't you at all...
Sunita: I can't face this all over again! It's too much!
Jake: But don't you see, it wasn't you! You were made to do what he wanted, you have nothing to feel guilty over!
Sunita: I - I have things to sort out. It's difficult. I need time... I should help Ziggy look at those books.
Jake: You need a hand with that?
Sunita: Yes. Alright. (weak smile) Thank you.

They both return to the stacks.

Early next morning Quentin Travers, Master of Security for the Council, is perfectly relaxed as he sits opposite Escher. Sunita and Margot huddle together behind Escher, standing up straight and trying to look attentive rather than worried.

Travers: So, as I understand it, young Mr. Roots isn't just a refugee from some kind of wizard war, he's actually the son of the enemy general.
Margot: Er, yes.
Escher: Apparently.
Travers: And he has inherited the family's share of power.
Sunita: Er... so it would appear.
Travers: Interesting. So, we've brought a new threat to the organisation, most especially the Prenticeship here. I rather think that we should gain something in return, don't you?
Sunita: Ah, well, ah, he has been very helpful, and ever since the discovery of his abilities he's been using them to, uh, our advantage...

Ziggy pauses at the door, hearing arguing from inside...

Escher (coldly): But I am his Invigilator.
Travers: That you are. However, this is no longer a Prenticeship matter. Young Mr. Roots presents a clear threat to the safety of tutelage herein, and I feel that this should be addressed immediately. From the reports I've received he might be better served in a more secure location.
Escher: (flatly) And this would let you use him as a resource. But of course that never crossed your mind.
Travers: Quite so, Michael, quite so...
Sunita: Mister Travers, surely I emphasised the vital role he plays within the team...

Travers looks suspiciously at Ziggy as he enters and heads for the office kitchen, looking away to hide his shocked expression. He calms himself and steps out, all smiles.

Ziggy: So, Mister Escher, who's your new best buddy?
Escher: (flatly) You remember Mister Travers, the Council's Master of Security.
Ziggy: Ah. Right. The pleasure is all yours.

As Travers has his back to her, Sunita shakes her head in a "not now" kind of way.

Ziggy: So you've figured out there must be a security problem. After the coven had to come and completely rebuild the wards against magical attack. Fast! So are we gonna get guards or, gasp, cameras?

Sunita and Margot make the hand-cutting-the-air "stop!" gesture.

Ziggy: So, I made my joke. Why are you here? I can cast spells, I can't read minds. Yet.
Travers: A matter of Council concern, that is all. Well, I'll leave that on your desk for the time being, Michael. Good day. Tell Mister Grove and Miss Blackhurst they can come back in now.

As Travers goes, Escher rises to his feet, pounds the desk with his fist, and goes over to Ziggy.

Escher: (concerned) How much of that did you hear?
Ziggy: Enough...

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

05-09-2004, 06:05 PM

Ziggy: So something was summoned. Dunno what. Not that much to go on.
William: So, patrolling?
Escher: Yes.
Jack: Patrolling is like a pub crawl, only with weapons.
Ziggy: How about Jack, you take care of the pubs and we'll cover the streets?

There is general nodding, and the group lapses into silence again.

Ziggy: Did I miss a funeral?
Jake: Yeah, mine.
Ziggy: Tell people to snap out of it.
Jake: Think that'll work?
Ziggy: It's over. It's done.
Jake: It'll be fine...

Jake: Coming on patrol?
Milli: No. I have work to do.
Jake: Work. Work that's not patrolling?
Milli: (flatly) I need to study magic so that if I need to hit someone, they can't stop me.
Jake: Like Skel's shield, right?
Milli: (bitterly) Like Skel's shield, or like what's his name pinning me so I couldn't move...
Jake: Oh... (pause) That wasn't magic. That was telekinesis.
Milli (to Luna): How can I break a barrier if it's been put up by telekinesis?
Luna: Ah! Well, if it was a psychic attack you need to defend yourself totally differently. You need to disrupt the user's alpha waves or break their concentration. A really loud noise or a good solid impact should do it in most cases...
Milli: Good to know.

Ziggy: Look, you had a moment of weakness, it happens to us all.
Milli: I don't like sitting there unable to do anything, okay?
Jack: Hey, I couldn't do anything either. Of all the people in that room there were only two who could do something.
Milli: And I want to be one of those two!
Jack: But...
Milli: If it doesn't bother you that you were powerless, that's fine. It bothers me. Anyway, I'm not patrolling, I have things to do.
Ziggy: Fine. We'll send you our hospital bills.
Milli: Don't be like that.
Ziggy: Honestly. Bunch of drama queens!

And with that he storms out, slamming the door.

Jake shakes his head and opens the door to follow, but doesn't make it out before Jack tags along.

Jake: So, just out of morbid curiosity, what was your plan?
Jack: Well, I set the fire alarm off...
Jake: Because...?
Jack: Because he was scared of fire.
Jake: The fire that he walked out of unscathed...
Milli: And all that did was get me to lock the door so he couldn't get out anyway.
Jake: Thought it'd be really stupid...
Jack: And I had Andy waiting, like a brace of archers...
William: Did he even have a bow?
Jake: Okay, Jack, promise me something. You'll never, ever read a book again?

Jack: ... So, Luna, witchcraft? How'd you get into something like that?
Luna: Oh, there's a whole seventh daughter of a seventh daughter thing.
Jack: Right, interesting... Does this warding spell have backup batteries? In case the leyline gets tapped?
Luna: Well, that'd take hundreds of people summoning things at the same time.
Jack: Or someone like Ziggy drawing power from it.
Luna: Uh, as I understand it he draws power from his own reserves and the ambient thaumogenic field...
Jack: So how do become a wizard then?
Jake: You don't.
Jack: So there are people with more natural power? Like Luke Skywalker?
Luna: Exactly!
Jack: Would you like to go for a drink sometime?
Luna: Oh, sure.

Milli badly suppresses a loud laugh as Jack heads out looking pleased with himself. Luna looks puzzled by Mill's reaction.

Ziggy looks back in.

Jake: You should really come along. Blow the cobwebs out.
Milli: I'm really really busy.
Jake: C'mon. It could be important.
Milli: You're just as good in a fight as I am.
Jake: That's not true.
Milli: Yeah, you're considerably better than I am. You don't need me.
Jake: We do. You're just avoiding it... (pause, looks hard at Milli, who studiously avoids his gaze) You didn't fail... (softly) you got me out.
Milli: I... I'm busy.
Jake: (desperately) And you'll get out of practice!
Milli: I'm not out of practice! I've been patrolling all week. It's just that this is more important than a random patrol and it has to be done now.
Jake: ... Right. Coming to the pub later, or are you in all night?
Milli: Well, I need to sleep.

Ziggy steps up.

Ziggy: Yeah, self-pity will only keep you alive a couple days.
Milli: It's not... What's your problem?
Ziggy: You're in a hole and you're digging deeper.
Milli: No, I'm trying to dig myself out of a hole...
Ziggy: Come on. You're part of this group.
Milli: I am, and will be, once I've got this out of my way.

Milli: I need to learn about magic.
Ziggy: You want to...
Milli: I want to... you would never, ever understand.
Sunita: Let her alone. If only everyone was so conscientious in their studies.

Ziggy shakes his head and follows Jake and Sunita out.

Ziggy: What is it I wouldn't understand?
Jake: You wouldn't understand.
Ziggy: You want me to hit you?

They catch up with Jack, who has been waiting less than patiently.

Jack: Come on, let's kill things.
Ziggy: What don't I get, what can't I comprehend?
Jack: She's upset because she got beaten. She feels vulnerable. She's not used to that. See, she's like the alpha male of the pack...
Ziggy: There's always something about your theories...
Jack: She wants to not feel vulnerable. She wants to prove she's still the alpha, so she needs to reassure herself.
Ziggy: Have you been watching the Discovery Channel?
Jack: Well, it's been coming through clearly.

Andy: So that's why she's upset...
Jake: Everyone else is pissed off with something I did.
Jack: But you keep saying it's not you.
Jake: (angrily) Saying? What do you mean, saying?
Jack: I mean it's like you always tell us you didn't do it.
Jake: Like I tell you? You don't believe me?
Jack: Hey, my knowledge of psychic stuff is like zero.
Jake: Right! So kindly SHUT UP!

The group carry on in silence.

As Milli pops out to have a quick smoke and clear her head, Adelia appears in front of her from nowhere. She raises her hands as Mill goes for a knife.

Adelia: You won' be needing dat, chere.
Milli: Sorry, I just get freaked out when people appear out of thin air in front of me. And I'm not putting this away.
Adelia: Fair enough, but I'm not 'ere to fight you. I wouldn't have come alone, and I certainly wouldn't have waited until you had dat magic sword, and your witches were done with the new barrier spell, now would I?
Milli: Pretty, isn't it?
Adelia: Yes, yes it is. But anyway, I'm not 'ere to fight. I'm 'ere to offer you a deal.
Milli: A deal. Why would I want to make a deal with you?
Adelia: You're Ziggy's friend. I thought you might be able to talk some sense into him.
Milli: What do you mean? I can't do that. Well, I could, but I don't have that much time in my life...

Adelia: Before 'e left, Ziggy was mystically empowered, above an' beyond the normal power in our family. Maybe you've seen the tattoo on 'is back? It's a witchmark. And now 'e's left the family behind, our father wants the power back. Now Thomas thinks 'e's a traitor and we should take it out of 'is hide, but I'm workin' on a way to draw it out of him wit'out hurting him. Now, this is 'appening one way or another...
Milli: No. He's not going to get the power, any way.
Adelia: He will, my way or Thomas's way. Before your Council take Ziggy away for "his protection".
Milli: What?
Adelia: I rather think that was the point of the meeting.
Milli: What meeting?
Adelia: This morning.

Milli blinks and frowns, but quickly hides it.

Milli: He'd... he'd never allow that. And if he's that powerful, he won't let you take the power away.
Adelia: Probably not. But our father made sure he isn't as powerful as he is.
Milli: So, you can just take away his power?
Adelia: Yes.
Milli: And you say you could or would do this without hurting him?
Adelia: I have no reason to lie.
Milli: Or to tell me any of this.
Adelia: I'm telling you this because you have his best interests at heart. This way, this stupid little family feud ends and nobody gets hurt... This whole thing got this bad because he's stubborn. Like our whole family, ya know...

She smiles self-deprecatingly and turns to go, allowing Milli a clear shot at stabbing her in the back, which she doesn't take. Then she turns slightly.

Adelia: Oh. One last t'ing. This magical effect around the library? Ya might want to look up succubi.
Milli: (suspiciously) Uh... thanks.

As she speaks, in a darkened attic room, another voice echoes:

Shmuck: Succubi! Sweet sisters! I offer blood and desire! Come forth!

The thin young man speaking smiles as the air turns black in the centre of a chalk circle, thickening into a horned and winged shape.

Shmuck: Uh, human form, please?
Succubus: Any one in particular, my lord?
Shmuck: Maybe later. Just lose the horns and wings and, uh, claws. Thanks.
Succubus: As it please you.

She steps forward, long white-blonde hair strategically placed to keep this as a family show, and gives the boy a sultry smile.

Succubus: Now, what do you wish of me?
Shmuck: I, uh, want you to be my girlfriend. At least until the end of term. Go to the mingle with me and all.
Succubus: And in return, I can dine on a human heart every night of the new moon?
Shmuck: Oh, sure. I haven't brought one, though. You'll just have to, y'know, dine out.
Succubus: Is there a particular heart you wish me to feast upon?
Shmuck: Nah... oh, actually, how about one of those girl-chasing gits from the rugby club?
Succubus: Very good, my lord.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

05-09-2004, 06:08 PM

Milli heads back inside.

Milli: Why was Travers here?
Escher: Mister Travers is of the opinion that Ziggy's presence is a threat to us.
Milli: So, what?
Escher: He suggested a more protected location for him.
Milli: (worried) Sending him away?
Escher: Or... cutting him loose.
Milli: (shocked) But, but... you're his boss... well, not his boss, more like his babysitter. So he can't just send him away. Right?
Escher: Travers is on the Council. He has final say on matters of security.
Milli: Why didn't you tell me?
Escher: I thought Ziggy would... I should know better. I'm sorry.
Milli: So he knows, but he didn't tell us... of course. What did he say?
Escher: Not much...
Milli: Right. Well, in future, when you think Ziggy's going to tell us something, tell us.
Escher: Of course.
Milli: (mutters) Now I have considerably more work to do...

As they follow Ziggy, while he looks for the trail to the succubus's summoner:

Jack: Pub after?
Jake: Don't you have that date with Luna?
Jack: Not tonight.
Jake: And they're leavin' tomorrow.
Jack: Uh... I better go back and check.

Luna: Okay, so most shielding spells use some variation on the same coding. It depends on language, of course, but there should be some points in common.

Milli nods and rubs tired eyes, idly flicking to an image of a succubus... then looking up as a dark shape flies past the window, back down to the page, then back to the window as she sees it swooping towards Jack's back. Grabbing her crossbow and sword she charges out.

Milli: Jack, look out!
Jack: What for?
Milli: LOOK OUT! DUCK!

He turns to see a black-winged vaguely female shape swooping, claws outstretched.

Jack: Oh, is that not one of ours?
Milli: No, that's a succubus! Get down!

With that, she fires a bolt, but the thing's going too fast and it just tears a scrap out of her batlike wing. Jack, getting the idea, fires himself, getting her in the thigh and drawing a little black blood. She grabs him by the scruff of the neck and hauls him into the air, he punches her on the toe and she drops him. Milli fires again, a perfect shot into the heart. The demon sneers and tears the bolt out, throwing it back at her...

Ziggy leads the others to a particular door.

Jake: Spider sense tingling?
Ziggy: That and the smell of incense.

Andy nods and kicks the door in.

The shmuck looks up from his ritual circle, holds his arcane dagger, looks at the group and pointedly drops it.

Jake: Well now, what was going on here?
Shmuck: Uh... nothing? It's an... art installation.
Jake: Really. And that's a nice dagger. Looks kinda specific. Like a sacrificial dagger maybe. Were you sacrificing something?
Shmuck: Me? No...
Ziggy: Okay smart boy, what did you summon?
Shmuck: (mumbles) A succubus.
Jake: As if normal women aren't enough trouble?

And with that he knees the shmuck in the nuts. Hard.

Jake: Well, he really won't have the urge now. So, who is he?
Ziggy: No idea.
Sunita: Let me just find his matriculation card...

Succubus: Ha! Mundane mortal weapons...

Milli dives to the side as her bolt buries itself in the ground where she stood. The succubus veers, claws outstretched like a fishing eagle, to swoop towards Milli... who steadies herself, sets down the crossbow, draws the sword, waits until the last moment and strikes.

Milli: I also have some non-mundane mortal weapons.

The enchanted sword rips into the succubus's chest right up to the hilt. She gives a surprised little gurgle and collapses, dead.

Jack: Thanks.
Milli: No bother. What are you doing back?
Jack: Oh. Date. With Luna. You need any help with that?
Milli: No, no, I'll do it. Run along. Have fun.

Sighing, she sheathes her sword, picks up her other weapons and heads inside.

Milli: There's a dead succubus outside. Can you clear it up? I don't really have time.
Escher: ... Of course.

Adelia steps into her suite. Thomas looks up from a book, one of hundreds in the library of the family's home outside of town.

Thomas: Well, what did she say?
Adelia: She said no. But she's thinking about it.
Thomas: He won't go for it, you know.
Adelia: Probably not. But we have to try. He's our brother.
Thomas: Not any more. He made that clear enough to me.
Adelia: Well, he's still my brother.
Thomas: (snorts) Sometimes I wonder if I'm the only loyal member of this family. Just remember, the alignment is barely a month away. One way or another, your brother will add his power to our father's for the great work.
Adelia: (coldly) Even if it kills him?
Thomas: (grimly) Yes.

Then he sighs as she meets his gaze, frowning.

Thomas: But don't worry. I know you want him back alive, and I'll do my best. But no promises...

CREDITS!
GRR! ARG!

Craig Oxbrow

05-09-2004, 06:10 PM

Escher V/O: Next time, on The Watch House:

Milli fighting with a vampire.

Jake and Ziggy in the pub, not really talking.

Milli and Emma looking through a spellbook, chatting casually.

Escher with his head in his hands.

William looking very, very confused.

Escher V/O: The next episode of The Watch House is... well, that would be telling.

--
DVD Commentary:

Craig: Thematically, Magic Tricks is about muddying the waters. Milli and Ziggy learn that a leading member of the Watchers wants to use Ziggy as a weapon, while Milli discovers that Ziggy's sister might, I stress might, want to save his life. Each of them has seen another aspect of one of the sides in this conflict, and now they're pretty confused.

Cat: Everyone's worried about Milli not fighting, but she's been patrolling every night since, just not with them. She's just never been more focused on her job, which is group protector. She's gone from not really knowing or caring about any of them except William to wanting to protect them.

(As Jack explains Milli's mood)
Cat: You know you're in trouble when Jack is the one making sense.
(As he continues and calls Milli the alpha male)
Craig: Well, we're not in too much trouble then.

--
Actual Play bit:

Another bitty, plotty episode. This was kind of unavoidable, but I tried to keep things flowing through the various uncomfortable silences that resulted from the new group dynamic of the most talkative PCs and NPCs not really talking to each other. Hence the episode ending in normal session length and this writeup being so short.

The MotW was there to (a) get the group back in the saddle, (b) prove that Adelia was telling the truth about something at least, and (c) get some cheap laughs. And delightfully, Jack's player agreed to go off on his own without prompting. Bless 'im.

Next time... oy.

Craig Oxbrow

05-16-2004, 08:33 PM

Before we start, I should point out that the players played their own cast, but played each other, not themselves.

Quite why they did this is beyond me.

Anyway...

Craig Oxbrow

05-16-2004, 08:34 PM

The Watch House 2.12: The Fourth Wall

Milli: punkette angst-fuelled Watcher trainee
Ziggy: badass sorcerer and son of supervillain, genuinely concerned about Milli
Jake: psychic civilian currently feeling rather guilty and lost
William: Mister Watcher Trainee
Andy: quiet unassuming hereditary lycanthrope, in control, oh yeah, you betcha
Sunita: Watchers' Council very proper teaching assistant

(AWOL)
Jack: rugby-playing civilian, fallen back in with the Watch

(NPC)
Escher: dour but fatherly Watchers' trainer
Emma: Jake's broken-hearted spellcasting ex
Margot: Watchers' Council fairly slapdash teaching assistant

--

Previously, on The Watch House:

Milli flattening Marty Gramercy while he's in the process of casting a spell.

Milli: If you ever try anything like that again... No power or riches for you, little boy.

Marty receiving a slap on the hand from the master of the college, and turning to go - eyes turning black...

--

We open on Milli whirling a short sword in a figure of eight, forcing a snarling vampire back. From somewhere, we hear a voice shout "and back!" and the vampire shifts to the side and Milli swings down where he was, acting as if he's still there.

The camera pulls back to reveal the gloomy cemetery... and a camera crew standing around it. A young man with short dark hair wearing a black longsleeve and combats hops out of a director's chair and claps his hands.

Craig: Okay Soph, that was great. Wanna grab some lunch while we set up for the crypt scene?

Milli, apparently answering to "Soph", smiles and nods.

Sophia: Sure thing.

The man shouts across to a slight, dark-haired young woman sitting by a wall going through a script with a red marker pen.

Craig: Cat? Lunch?
Cat: Oh, sure. We still need to talk about this dialogue polish...
Craig: Cool. If we can do that before the interviewers get here that'd be great.

The three of them step out of the cemetery and into a soundstage, across from what appears to be the interior of a crypt. They pass the vampire chatting amiably with Andy and Ziggy at the water cooler...

Andy: I'm really concerned about my role. I mean, he's a werewolf, suffering an ancient family curse. He should be tormented. But generally he's just... spaced. I mean, my agency calls, they say "play a werewolf", I expected a lot more personality. And that's without the hours in makeup for the transformation sequences. And having to be careful in case the prop hair falls out... How are the "evil magic" contact lenses working for you?
Ziggy: (speaking with a US accent) They're not bad. I suppose I got off lightly. So the bookseller finally delivered my new order, the collected Nietzche...

They carry on past Escher pacing as he studies a script...

Escher: More bloody exposition. You can write this (BEEP) Craig, but you can't say it...

Then past William, looking very, very confused. Cat addresses him.

Cat: Mark, you're remembering that Simon Pegg's coming in this afternoon for this promo piece?
William: Uh...

And as they carry on, he looks around, bewildered, at the set that would appear to be behind the scenes of his life.

William: Right...?

CREDITS!

The Making Of The Watch House

Featuring:

Sophia Myles: "Milli"
Shawn Wayans: "Ziggy"
James McAvoy: "Jake"
Hans Matheson: "Andy"
Alfred Molina: "Escher"
Laura Fraser: "Emma"
James Van Der Beek: "Jack"
Mark Hamilton: "William"
Parminder Nagra: "Sunita"
Sally Phillips: "Margot"

Craig: executive producer of The Watch House
Cat: producer, writer, head of the production staff
Joe: producer, staff writer
Derek: producer, writer, stunt co-ordinator
Jamie: staff writer

Presented by Simon Pegg

Craig Oxbrow

05-16-2004, 08:48 PM

Simon Pegg (http://www.spaced-out.org.uk/images/m2/m2/s2-filming/l2/sp03.jpg) addresses the camera with a smile.

Simon: Good evening. I'm Simon Pegg. Tonight we're going behind the scenes of The Watch House, the BBC's hit new comedy-adventure series. We'll be talking to the stars and the creators about the premise of the series, and what the future holds for the characters in the forthcoming series finale, and beyond...

Craig smiles a little uncomfortably and speaks to the camera.

Craig: Hi, I'm Craig Oxbrow, I'm the executive producer of The Watch House. It's set in Cambridge, but not the Cambridge of our world. Here, for centuries King's College has been one of the home bases of the Watchers, a secret society of occult experts dedicated to fighting vampires, demons, and the forces of darkness. The show focuses on a group of Watchers in training, lead by Milli, and other students with a reason to join the fight, such as Ziggy.

Another to-camera shot, now of Milli. But a tagline introduces her as Sophia Myles, "Milli" (http://www.sophiamyles.co.uk/images/photos/phot_underworld01.jpg). And her hair is fair rather than pink.

Sophia: I play Millicent "Milli" Blackhurst. She's a Watcher. (nods and grins) And, um, she's very physical. And she has pink hair!
Simon: And you don't.
Sophia: No, obviously, so I have to wear a wig, or use temporary dyes for closeups. And I have clip-on earrings and this (taps the stud in her nose) is fake too.
Simon: So you're quite different from your character.
Sophia: (laughs) Oh God, totally. Have you seen the way she dresses?

Andy is apparently called Hans Matheson.

Hans: Ah, hello. Hans Matheson. Andy. I'm a graduate of RADA. Seven years in the theatre, including two years of Shakespeare in Stratford. Before this I'd done a little film and television work, but I've never been on a lunchbox before. (holds up a The Watch House lunchbox and smirks...)
Simon: Can you explain a little about your character?
Hans: Of course. Andy comes from a family suffering an ancient curse of lycanthropy. In layman's terms he's a werewolf. Unfortunately he had a happy childhood apart from this, so he isn't really equipped to deal with the outside world. He has very little idea of how to handle himself. He tends to drink to pass the time. I tell you, though, it's rough physically. Especially when I have to put on the monster makeup. They're starting to get the time down, it's less than an hour for the halfway change. But it gets so hot under the studio lights, I have to take a shower every time we wrap a scene. It's certainly been an interesting time apart from that, a fun year or so. But I must admit I look forward to a break in shooting to get back to the legitimate theatre -

William, watching from the sidelines and still looking very confused, sees Craig make the hand-cutting-air "stop!" move in Andy's/Hans's eyeline.

James McAvoy, "Jake"

James: Hi. Hi. Hi... Yeah, hi. Hi... hi. (lots of nodding)
Simon: Jake is the man in the show's main romantic triangle.
James: Absolutely. It's really good drama, a lot to get my teeth into. Really deep, yeah. A lot going on.
Simon: The group dynamic really changed recently, where's that going?
James: Haha! You'll have to wait and see. That's more in the hands of the writers, of course. We rely on them for the lines. Not so much with Jake, though, he tends more to get stage directions for his moods, you know, the looks! Jake's all about the looks. (Stares intently at Simon, nodding )

Sally Phillips, "Margot"

Sally: Margot and Sunita were introduced recently because the Watchers in training are a bit rebellious and need more looking after. Of course they're discovering that the whole situation is far more involved than they thought...

James Van Der Beek, "Jack"

JVDB: Jack's the normal guy. Of course he's handsome, charming and rich (smirks) but he doesn't come from a Watcher background or have any strange powers. I tried to persuade Craig to let him be a crack fighter, but apparently someone has to be normal...

Laura Fraser, "Emma"

Laura: I'm Laura Fraser, I play Emma. She was originally introduced apparently as a plot device - someone the group could turn to for help with magic. But as time went on she started going out with Jake, much to Milli's dismay. The writers have always made a point that they'd be really good friends if it wasn't for that. And now she's broken up with Jake she's sort of latched on to Mill. Her magics will be really important in the rest of this series, but her emotional journey is important too...

And we cut to Milli and Emma in the practice room.

Emma: So how's the sword working out?
Milli: I don't want to use it on every random patrol. I want to keep it for when it's really needed.
Emma: Right.
Milli: Any luck with the other kinds of spells we were looking at?
Emma: A little with the obscuring mist. I mean, it's not a smoke grenade yet, but... ahem...

She sprinkles some dust into a bowl and reads aloud:

Emma: Let his senses be confounded and the air filled up. Let darkness absorb his darkened mind.
Sensus confundatur et aer oppleatur. Caligo absorbeat mentem obscuratam.

A rather unimpressive amount of fog spills slowly out of the bowl. Emma slumps dejectedly.

Emma: Maybe it'll work better when there's actually someone to affect.
Milli: Maybe.
Emma: Okay, this is about as thick as the smoke at the pub. At lunchtime. When it's sunny out.
Milli: It's a start.

William watches that scene on a monitor, then looks across as Milli practices a roundhouse kick with a woman who would appear to be Milli's stunt double... And we cut back to the fair-haired not-quite-Milli.

Sophia: It's quite interesting because she really likes Emma. So Milli probably feels... sad. Definitely sad. I'm not sure though, I haven't read the future scripts yet. Did it come across that I was sad? Of course, now they're broken up Milli might be happy. I'm going to make her be more happy. Smile a lot more, be more helpful...

Escher lounges in the interview seat. A caption introduces him as Alfred Molina - "Escher" (http://www.safesearching.com/2k/assets/photos/actor/alfredmolina//alfred_s_show022.jpg).

Alfred: Escher is the other characters' Invigilator, their tutor in the ways of the Watcher. This means a lot of lecturing and exposition, which can be very difficult for an actor.

And we cut to the office. Escher looks up from a book.

Escher: All signs point to a Nakaf... Nak... BOLLOCKS! How the bloody hell do you pronounce this?

A young man with longish dark hair and a beard steps on stage and flicks through the script. He explains the pronunciation with a Greek accent...

Joe: Nakafelmis. Na-ka-felm-iss.
Alfred: Nakafelmis. Nakafelmis.
Joe: Yes, exactly like it's spelled.
Craig: Okay, from the top.

Alfred: Fortunately, his developing relationship with the other characters has given me some more dramatic meat this series, and there's more to come. His fatherly protectiveness towards Milli will come to the fore very significantly...

Alfred shakes himself out, rereads the Post-It note attached to the book, waits for the camera signal, and leans over, suddenly seeming like Escher again. The camera pans around, and we can now see everyone. The office has become the office again. William still looks confused. Everyone else looks suitably attentive or inattentive. Except Sunita, who just saw Joe and Craig walk through the wall...

Escher: It seems that someone is using magic against us. All signs point to a Nakafelmis Demon at work. These are quite difficult to -
Sunita: What are you talking about? A Nakafelmis? What signs? Didn't you just see two men walk through the wall?!
Milli... Sophia: Are we on the same page of the script here?

Sunita sees the opposite wall and the ceiling shimmer as Cat walks right in through the wall.

William: Huh?
Sunita: Script?
Sophia: Are we improvising? Because I really do study my lines, you know.
Hans: Whoa.
James: Improv? I was up all night rehearsing my cues... I had so much expression worked out...
Shawn: Can I keep my GameBoy line? I'm told it's very funny.

Sunita shakes her head and heads for the stacks. She opens a book to find it's blank.

Sunita: Ziggy can't have gotten away with all the books...

Shawn: That's it, I'm going to my trailer! (gets up, revealing a distinct lack of trousers on his part)
Sophia: So am I!... My trailer I mean!

The wall and ceiling disappear, revealing a camera crew, lighting rig, and irritated director.

Craig: Okay, lunch!
Sunita: But it's only half past ten...
William: It's a free lunch. Come on.
Sunita: What's going on? Are you still you?
William: Apparently. We need to look around...

They come to the edge of the set. Sunita pauses, gulps, and steps out into the "real world"...

And we cut back to Simon.

Simon: When we come back, I'll be talking to some of the creative minds behind The Watch House, and taking a look at what the future holds for our heroes...

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

05-16-2004, 08:52 PM

Sunita goes into the side office and picks up the phone.

Sunita: This is a huge breach of security, the Council has to be informed...

She finds that the phone doesn't actually work. Stifling a cry of frustration, she slams the receiver against the wall. She stumbles out, looking alarmed.

Sunita: Would someone please tell me what's going on?
William: There has to be a logical explanation. Or at least a logical explanation involving magic.
Sunita: But where is everybody?
Cat: (passing by) Lunch break? Remember?
Jamie: I had a pizza for lunch yesterday. It was good.

William and Sunita look at the young guy with long black hair dressed rather like Andy. Cat shares their expression, the expression usually reserved for Andy.

Jamie: And I had some HT.
Sunita: HP? The sauce?
Jamie: No, HT. Hot chocolate.
Cat: Er, shouldn't that by HC?
Jamie: No, no, definitely HT. I had a couple flatmates who always called it that.
William: Er... right.

And we cut from their expressions back to Craig's interview.

Craig: We have a group writing approach. We generally break the story together, then one of us takes the individual episode script, and then we all polish it. We tend to sneak in a few of our own traits, and each others', into the characters.

She leads him (and the subtly following Su) to a table on the Brody set, with Craig, Joe and some guy with a short Mohican and stubbly goatee.

Joe: You know what, we should use the joke about the 'ippopotamoose!
Cat: I'm pretty sure we did that already.
Jamie: I was in Africa last year, I nearly saw a hippopotamus. But then I didn't. I saw an elephant instead.
Craig: Uh... right. Yes.

Mohican guy notices Sunita lurking.

Derek: How are your lines?
Sunita: Er, they're fine...
Derek: We could rehearse. Maybe my place, tomorrow night?
Sunita: Erm... who are you? What are you doing here?
Derek: I'd be Derek. Writing, stunts? We shared a cab on the way to that awards ceremony last month? I showed you how to do that trick with the vibrating setting on your phone?

Sunita nods slightly and sidles away to find Will. She discovers him knocking on the plasterboard wall of a tomb interior.

Sunita: Did that reference mean anything to you? The one thing in all this madness that might be real?
William: Nakafelmis demons? I'm not sure. Normally I'd ask Mister Escher, or consult the books, but...
Sunita: The books aren't real... (worried) and neither is Mister Escher.

Jamie: We should go to the pub.
Cat: We're in the pub.
Derek: I was thinking Jake could have a threesome with Emma and Sunita...
Cat: But he's supposed to be pining for Milli.
Joe: Besides, I don't think Laura would be keen. Not now that she and Hans are engaged.
Derek: What? Damn...

Sunita: Well, something must have happened to reality. I mean, who would watch a TV show about Watchers? Of course it's important but I'm sure it would be quite boring.
William: Oh, I don't know. Monster hunting, college life...
Sunita: Well, even so, we have to fix this. Still, we have one advantage. They think we're the actors.
William: So who are you?
Sunita: I don't know.

Just then, Cat comes over with her clipboard at the ready.

Cat: Parminder?
Sunita: Er... yes?
Cat: Have you learned the revised lines for the briefing scene?
Sunita: I was just going over it.
Joe: I was thinking we could have a love interest with you and Jake. Really put the characters in pain. Heap on the angst!
Jamie: I don't think she's taking this seriously.
Sunita: (quietly) Okay, we have to just play along until we can find out what's really happening.
William: It might help if we had the script.
Jamie: There are scripts?
Cat: Yes... you're a writer...
Jamie: But I need to know what we wrote.
Cat: You were there...

William and Sunita leave Cat trying to demystify the production process and approach Craig.

Sunita: Er, apparently there are some new pages?
Craig: There are? (looks around) JOE!
Sunita: Well, we might be wrong. Er, could we have a look at the script?
Craig: What, you left your copies at home?
William: Ah... yes.
Craig: Actors...

They withdraw to the library set to read.

William: So where are we?
Sunita: I can't tell.
William: Skip to the end...
Sunita: "Exterior: Graveyard. Day. The group, in black, gathered around Ziggy's grave..."

Simon: Next up, a look at the grand finale of this series...

CUT!

SteveD

05-16-2004, 08:54 PM

Holy shit.

Is this a spell? Please be a spell. If so, this is the BEST ALTERNATE UNIVERSE IDEA EVER. Being transported into the "Making Of" episode of your life. Gold.

Steve

Craig Oxbrow

05-16-2004, 08:58 PM

Sunita and William paging backwards from Ziggy's funeral scene.

Sunita: He sacrifices himself to stop the demon killing everyone else... after being unable to find who summoned it...
William: Ah. Here. "Escher: All signs point to a Nakafelmis Demon at work. These are quite difficult to summon, because their powers are extensive... They can affect the flow of time, transport people and objects, conceal things so that no-one knows they're missing...
Sunita: That's a little vague.
William: But it sounds like they can alter reality.
Sunita: Anything about how to find it?
William: We have to force it to manifest. Possibly by threatening the summoner...
Sunita: So we just need to find who that is... before they shoot Ziggy's death scene.

They start to look around.

Sunita: But how are we going to defeat it without Milli and Jake? Maybe we could drop one of those studio lights on it. They look pretty heavy... but they only exist in its reality, would they even hurt it? Aaaagh... We need to find whoever summoned it. Look for someone hanging around who isn't "working".

Derek runs by, tapping away on the keys of his mobile phone, then Cat rushes up to them.

Cat: Did you get the new scripts?
Sunita: Yes?
Cat: Did you like your line, the funny line? You can tell it's funny, it says "laugh" after it.
Sunita: Funny.
Cat: Good! Wait till I tell Joe!

They pass the stars, with Jake... James looking intense.

James: James: So here they have the bit where Milli says her piece, and in response Jake says "yeah". How should this come across? I mean, what is the motivation behind it?
Sophia: Well, I was going to say my line, and if you could say "yeah" after it...
James: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah?
Sophia: You only say it once.
Shawn: Look at it like this. Your line responds to the oppression of society against the artist, with the Watchers' Council as the former and Jake, of course, the latter.
James: Yeah! Yeaaahh...
Alfred: How about "yeah"?
Sophia: Anyway, how many channels is this interview going out on?
Alfred: Presumably the BBC.
Laura: Just a wild guess since we're on the BBC.
Hans: I don't know, never heard of this Simon Pegg person.
James: I think he's in comedy on BBC2 or something.
Laura: Oh yeah, vaguely...
Sophia: I really need to talk to Craig about the pink. I mean, I've had it for nine months now and it does not suit my complexion.

William and Sunita sneak over to an exit and look out.

Sunita: We're in London.
William: Oh.
Sunita: There goes the "localised spell" theory.

Shawn: I was thinking. How about this weekend we get together and read through our favourite scenes from Shakespeare?
Hans: Hamlet?
Alfred: Always you and Hamlet. None of you saw my lead in The Scottish Play.
Shawn: Julius Caesar?
Sophia: Oh, is that the one Brad Pitt was in?
Alfred: No, dear, I don't believe so.

Shawn: You should really look at Shakespeare. It's lyrical, full-blooded, really quite moving...
Sophia: Plus, the costumes! Ooh! Those great period dresses. I look sooooo good in those.
Shawn: Not so much in Caesar of course.
Sophia: Oh?
Shawn: More toga-like.
Sophia: Oh, I could do a toga. The lines are really nice...
Shawn: This would just be a readthrough...
Sophia: Aw. Ooh, What kind of eye colours did they have back then?
Shawn: Help me out here...
James: I can't really help there.
Laura: We know that after the scene where you help Milli out of the pit.
James: One slip! One slip! Am I ever gonna live that down?
Shawn: Fifteen takes...

Sophia: I've got it! Could I get you four to ask Craig about the pink?
James: What about the pink? Do you have a piece on at the moment?
Sophia: What? Does my hair look pink?!
James: I'm sure it's just the lights.
Sophia: Oh God! Makeup! MAKEUP!
James: Lovey, it's fine, Daaarling...
Sophia: MAKEUP!

William and Sunita pass, share a look of "we have to fix this NOW" and proceed...

Shawn: You shouldn't worry. The pink hair on your character underlines her function as the heroic figure of the piece and adds another level to it as a metaphor for femininity at the end of the Millennium.
Sophia: (pause) MAKEUP!

Finally, they spot someone out of place.

William: Marty.
Sunita: Marty?
William: He isn't in the cast list, and we stopped him summoning a demon just before you arrived.
Sunita: Sounds promising.
William: It's him or that interviewer guy.
Sunita: Hmm...
William: I think I'll have to hit him...

He passes Charlotte, or rather Kelly Harrison, the actress who "plays" her. He waves shyly, she gives him a friendly smile, and he hurries on, leaving her looking puzzled.

He stops by Marty, chatting to Kelly McDonald (Rachel). Marty looks up, a little suspiciously.

Marty: Mark...
William: Hi! What are you doing here? You're not in this episode, are you?
Marty: Ah, meeting with the producer. They're looking to bring my character back. So I can take revenge on you all. Or something. (smirks)
William: Right. Have you met, er, Parminder?
Marty: No. Mar-dy... Tom Hardy.

Sunita: (as they retreat) Did he just say "Hardy" or "Marty"?
William: Hmm.

Jamie: So I was thinking we could have a big war of werewolves and vampires!
Cat: As long as Milli gets to kick ass that could work.
Joe: And Ziggy gets his monologue in.
Cat: Ziggy this, Ziggy that, blah di blah.
Jamie: Werewolves and vampires fighting! And Andy could tear their like heads off and stuff. Like completely wolf out.
Craig: For God's sake, this is TV, not a bloody adventure game.
Jamie: No, it'd be cool. It's a big werewolf thing and what with me being a werewolf...
Derek: No, Andy is. I know he gets your lines but seriously...
Jamie: Werewolf expert...

Craig shakes his head. William and Sunita approach.

Sunita: We have an idea.
Craig: Go ahead. Make a change from the ideas my bloody writers give me...
Sunita: What if a demon could change reality in such a way that everyone thought the new world was the normal one?
Craig: An alternate reality? Cool. But what kind of reality?
Sunita: Well, er...
Cat: Hey, that Nakafelmis thing could do that, right?
Craig: But who'd want to mess with them that much?
Joe: Ziggy's family?
Cat: Well, they got a bunch of other enemies, right? Some of them use magic?
Derek: Victoria could!
Cat: Always you and Victoria. Just because you fancy the actress!
Derek: Hey!

Cat: Uh, anyway, have you read the new lines?
Sunita: Yes, and I have a question about something...
Derek: If it's very unfunny it's probably Cat's.
Cat: I do my best.
Craig: We know.
Sunita: Uh, yes... I was wondering about this decision to kill Ziggy?
Craig: What about it?
Sunita: Well, it seems to me he's a very strong character.
Joe: I agree.
Derek: You love Ziggy! Think about it though, he's kinda pointless.
Jamie: Y'know, that movie you were in about the football was really good.
Sunita: Um... Yeah? (blinks, shakes her head)
Cat: Anyway, we should call it a day.
Derek: Yeah, I got that party.
Craig: That we weren't invited to.
Derek: Hey, what can you say?
Craig: Yes, well, we're going to the theatre anyway.

Sunita and William withdraw, in something of a hurry. Across the canteen, Marty narrows his eyes...

Simon: We'll be right back with a look at the monsters and magic of The Watch House, and a few surprises besides!

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

05-16-2004, 08:58 PM

Originally posted by SteveD
Holy shit.

Is this a spell? Please be a spell. If so, this is the BEST ALTERNATE UNIVERSE IDEA EVER. Being transported into the "Making Of" episode of your life. Gold.

Steve
:D

Thank you, thank you...

Varyar

05-16-2004, 09:15 PM

Holy Mother of God, this is so cool.

Craig Oxbrow

05-16-2004, 09:18 PM

Shawn: Could someone find my assistant? I don't understand why this line is supposed to be funny. It doesn't seem to make any sense!
Sophia: His point isn't to make sense. I don't think he's very smart. We can't help it if you have to play an idiot.
Laura: Riiiight.
James: I wish we could get this scene shot. I haven't slept for two days to get these bags under my eyes...
Sophia: Oh. I was going to say I have some concealer...
James: It's Method, Sophie. Don't you think it comes across better?
Alfred: To quote Larry, wouldn't it be easier to simply act, dear boy?
Sophia: I hadn't thought about it.
James: You really hadn't...

Sunita sneaks by.

Sunita: Have you heard, there might be another new script?
Alfred: What, again? Bloody writers can't make their minds up...
James: I bet they'll let Jake get a good night's sleep for once! Typical!
Shawn: As long as they work on that scene sitting in the pub.
Sophia: I think I do that rather well.
James: Simply divine, dear.

Alfred shoots James a look.

Sophia: Thank you.
Shawn: Of course you aren't in this scene anyway.
Sophia: Oh. Where am I?
Shawn: Off getting the drinks, I think. Which is a bit sexist, I think.
Sophia: No, it's equality, and that's like good. So, what do you mean by Method acting?
Shawn: It's like methadone.
Sophia: So you take methadone instead of the drugs the character takes? Gosh.
James: Er, no. The whole De Niro style.
Sophia: Ohhhh, you want to be De Niro? I see.
Alfred: I met De Niro once. Lovely chap, very quiet offstage...
Sophia: What was that movie he was in where he pretended to be a woman to get a job on a soap?
James: That was Dustin Hoffman. Another great exponent of the Method!
Sophia: Ohh, right. And the one where he drove a taxi?
Laura: Taxi Driver? I guess?
Sophia: And he had all his little taxi friends hanging around the office? Very funny, ran for years.
James: That was Taxi. That was Danny De Vito.
Sophia: Oh, that's a different person? Riiight! Didn't know that!

Sophia: So does this new script mess up my Happy Milli idea?
James: It'll just get more confused. You really haven't thought about that?
Sophia: I haven't.
Alfred: (exasperated) We know, darling...

Sunita lets them bicker and withdraws.

James: It's easy for you, your character just goes with the flow. I have to get down to the nitty-gritty. (Gestures lots with his hands, hunched over the script)
Sophia: Like when Jake and Sunita did? (sighs) Would it kill them to give me a romantic scene?
Shawn: You know your character's an icon in the lesbian community.
Sophia: WHAT? Oh God! The pink! It all comes with the pink!
Alfred: Breathe, darling, breathe...

Sunita and William sneak into the copy room, taking a pen to the script.

Sunita: Okay, in case we don't have time to find the culprit, we rewrite the script. Give it a happy ending. Ziggy saves the day and the graveyard scene's actually a picnic. Hmm... We could write anything...
William: Hang on, I've got a better idea.

Sophia: Maybe it's because she's a strong independent woman. Or because she gets the drinks in.
James: Maybe it's because she isn't easy.
Shawn: You can't be easy and a lesbian?

William's better idea turns out to involve sneaking up behind Simon Pegg as he passes and hitting him on the head. When reality fails to reassert itself, he looks sheepish and drags the unconscious comedian into the copy room.

Alfred: Anyway, this pub scene. (grumbles) Sometimes I feel like the teacher offstage...
Shawn: Yes. Anyway. Ziggy has this big speech to Jake. Blah blah, something about some girl that sees right through you...
Milli: Oh, it's a reference to being invisible!
Laura: Er...
Milli: I think that episode may have been degrading to women...
Shawn: Ahem. It continues. There's some stuff about giving things to somebody. Hearts? Is that some sort of Jamaican birthday ritual? Oh... wait... is this actually (nodding) sarcasm?
Sophia: Gosh. Was that the Sunita thing? I think I was doing anger.
Shawn: Y'know, I think Parminder was actually a bit drunk while we were shooting.
Laura: No, really?
James: That's either really unprofessional or really Method...
Shawn: I think one of the writers spiked her drink. The one that keeps hitting on her.
Laura: Which one?
Sophia: So is this a ritual to swap hearts? I'm not good at the ritual thing. Too many lines to learn.
Shawn: Quite. Anyway, Ziggy carries on like this, then goes back to GameBoy. What is it with this GameBoy anyway? These little screens and flashing lights and that beepy music...
Sophia: Well, you can dance to the music. That's what I do.
Shawn: Oh really? How interesting. But isn't that a little... quiet?
Sophia: Oh, you need headphones. It's great exercise though.

Sunita copies the newly revised scripts, and opens the door to sneak out... and finds Marty waiting for her.

Marty: Er, what's going on?
Sunita: We're just collecting the new scripts.
Marty: Really. I don't think that's exactly your job.
Sunita: Well, er, we like to help out. Have you seen the script? You'll like the changes, you're in it now.
Marty Am I indeed...
Sunita: Yes, so how about we rehearse a bit, do the scene now?

William hands the new pages around.

Craig: "Marty gloats, he can improv. this, and then the Watchers attack and he sets the demon on them..."
Joe: I don't like it. I think I'll change it all.
William: You can't.
Marty: No. Only I can.

Marty blinks, eyes turning black, and smiles.

Craig: We can do that effect with contacts now? Cool...
Marty: Oh well. Never mind. Just have to set the demon on you while you're weak. I mean, little Sophie here isn't quite as good with a sword as Milli, and her stunt double already went home for the day. And I'm the only one with magic that isn't the magic of television...
Joe: This he calls gloating?
Cat: Oh, shut up.
Marty: Ah yes, Milli's spirit. In a form that isn't used to fighting at all.
Joe: No, you shut up!
Cat: No, you shut up!
Joe: Would you stop with the "Milli gets upstaged" stuff? Milli Milli Milli, blah di blah.
Cat: Could you shut up?
Joe: Is this is a race thing? Is it because I is Greek?
Marty: Oh, do shut up.

Cat: Was that thing supposed to show up? Why do I bother to write these lines?
Derek: You don't. Not the funny ones, anyway. (off her look) She also doesn't get sarcasm...

Marty: Oh, please just kill them!

And with that, the air thickens and a demon with reptilian skin materialises.

Craig: What the hell...?
Joe: You don't need to worry, I have everything under control!

Cat: It's just a test for an effect or something. Look, the skin's just latex... (prod, prod...) and leathery, and warm to the touch... and… ummm... gooey? Why is it so gooey?

William: Our weapons aren't props are they?
Sunita: Well, ours probably aren't.

And with that, they try to find out. William charges forwards with his axe as Sunita loads her pistol crossbow.

Cat lines up beside Sophia, and then Sophia runs away screaming.

Jamie: Was that supposed to be here today?
William: No, that's a real monster!
Jamie: Oh. Right...

Derek: Okay, people, this isn't a stunt. Someone get me a sword? (looks around) Anyone?

The Nakafelmis punches Derek into the office set, his head going through a wall which isn't normally fake.

Jamie: So this is... real... what?
Sunita: It's a real demon! (fires)
Craig: What's going on?
Sunita: That idea that someone uses magic to recreate reality - wasn't an idea! Marty did it!
Craig: Look, I don't think this is really fair! I mean, you say we don't really exist? But we're people! We have lives, we have hopes and dreams, we have feelings! I mean, what right do you have to say your reality is more valid than ours?
Cat: I'm actually funny in this reality, damn it! Also... demon trying to kill us.
Craig: Right. Good point... (sighs)

William and Sunita chase the demon into the office set. It snarls and charges forwards, Sunita shoots it in the chest and William slams his axe into its skull. It explodes like a lightbulb and suddenly the office is the office again. The hole Derek's head made in the wall repairs itself. Sunita and William just have time to see the writers becoming ethereal and joining with the actors to become their friends and colleagues again.

Sunita: Are we back?

William thumps the wall. It doesn't wobble.

Emma stumbles over to a chair.

Emma: Okay, what happened today? I remember something about not being me and Ziggy had an American accent... And no trousers for some reason...

Ziggy leans against the wall and says nothing.

Emma: And that guy from Spaced was interviewing me about something...
Milli: Yeah, I think I was a writer?

Everyone looks around... and notices Marty crawling towards the door.

Sunita: He had a demon alter reality so that all this was a TV show.

Sunita shoots a crossbow bolt next to his head. He stops crawling. Milli grabs him by the collar.

Milli: Right! I'm gonna kill you this time!

Escher raises a hand for pause.

Milli: Can we at least get his kicked out of college this time?
Jake: Aren't there Watcher prisons?
Ziggy: (quietly) Wouldn't surprise me.
Escher: We'll see. In the meantime, as this wasn't a first offence...

He punches Marty in the stomach and drops him to the floor.

Escher: Try for revenge and you'll get a lot worse...

Marty looks up, glares angrily... and then nods.

Back at the Brody, William subtly taps the walls to see they're solid and Charlotte wonders why. Ziggy puts James's She's A Star on the jukebox.

Emma: Why weren't you two affected? I mean, I'd have thought Ziggy would be the most likely.
Sunita: At a guess, he summoned the demon while we were reorganising the shelf of books on magical barriers after they were all used last week.
Milli: So, my body was some actress, my skills were a stunt double and my mind was a writer?
Sunita: Something like that.
Emma: Ow. Brain hurting. Brain hurting bad.
Milli: So who was everyone else?
Sunita: Jake was a really serious Method actor.
Milli: Yeah, I can see him like that.
Sunita:
Milli: So what was I like?
Sunita: Er...
William: You were a total professional.

CREDITS!
Craig: Hi. I'm Craig Oxbrow, for real this time. What you just saw was obviously a work of fiction. Sophia is a very clever and talented young woman. Alfred's a consummate professional and patient as the day is long. James and Shawn are great guys, really funny. Tom Hardy isn't really a supervillain...

Cat comes in and murmurs something to him.

Craig: Ah. Apparently Tom really IS a supervillain. My bad! (shrugs)
GRR! ARG!
CUT! That was beautiful!

Craig Oxbrow

05-16-2004, 09:19 PM

Escher V/O: Next time on The Watch House:

Benjamin Roots smiles devilishly.

Milli unsheathes her enchanted sword.

Emma raises her hands to cast a spell, trying to hide the terror in her eyes.

Adelia draws a forked dagger.

Charlotte looking wistful.
Charlotte: Time's running out...

Ziggy's eyes fill with darkness.

Escher V/O: The next episode of The Watch House is Light From A Dead Star.

--
DVD Commentary:

Craig: Hi, this is us talking about our performances as us in The Fourth Wall, which we also wrote.
Cat: My head's starting to hurt again already.

--
Actual Play bit

The Fourth Wall is the result of hearing about the Angel episode Smile Time and thinking "I can actually get away with any deranged idea I come up with!"

It was suggested by an episode in the game Kevin Mowery played in, where the Cast discover a TV show about them exists in another reality, but I pushed the structure way, way further. The basic idea really comes from Eerie, Indiana of course. I may as well confess my thefts boldly and clearly.

While breaking the episode down with my producers, one of them suggested that, instead of just playing themselves as the TV staff, they play each other. So in the first writer scene we have:
Cat as Jamie, Joe as Derek, Derek as Cat and Jamie as Joe.

In the second we have:
Cat as Derek, Joe as Jamie, Derek as Joe and Jamie as Cat.

In the third (the fight scene) we have:
Cat as Joe, Joe as Cat, Derek as Jamie and Jamie as Derek.

I still can't entirely believe I got away with this.

After this, the start of the season finale was relatively straightforward...

Craig Oxbrow

05-16-2004, 09:20 PM

Originally posted by Varyar
Holy Mother of God, this is so cool.
Everyone take a bow.

Pseudo Nymh

05-16-2004, 09:21 PM

Craig:

That is the best idea ever.

I hope you win the Nobel for this.

Orsino

05-16-2004, 09:55 PM

As much as I want to, there's no way I can steal this. It would never be as good. Kudos to you, Craig, and to all your cast. Fan-fucking-tastic.

I am so jealous.

thenewgirl

05-16-2004, 11:02 PM

SteveD

05-17-2004, 02:12 AM

Holy Mother of God, this is so cool.
What he said and what Nymh said.

If you don't get the Nobel Prize for Un-fucking-believably Brilliant Ideas I will personally beat the entire prize-giving comittee to death with a hamster.

Mytholder

05-17-2004, 02:13 AM

AWEsome.

morgue

05-17-2004, 02:42 AM

Y'all should have seen them sitting around like stoned kittens in the pub after.

What a beautiful game.

Varyar

05-17-2004, 04:59 AM

Originally posted by Craig Oxbrow
Everyone take a bow.

Encore! Encore!

Thanks for posting this stuff. It's great to read.

Craig Oxbrow

05-17-2004, 05:40 AM

:D

It's perfectly stealable, as long as you have an enthusiastic group who can and will run with it.

I mean, if I can get away with it, anyone can.

Thank you guys.

IanWatson

05-17-2004, 06:27 AM

Originally posted by Craig Oxbrow
The basic idea really comes from Eerie, Indiana of course. I may as well confess my thefts boldly and clearly.

That's what I thought. I was going to mention it, but I see you've beaten me to the punch.

A fine, fine episode (both the Eerie one and TWH). (:

Joe Dizzy

05-17-2004, 07:55 AM

One of the things which don't translate into the write-up, but which were part of what made this episode so much fun were the players impersonating other players bits, IRT their body language and facial expressions. It adds a lot to the general silliness at the gametable, which you might have noticed in the write-up. ;)

As far as sheer hillariousness... hillarity... Teh Funnay-nessity of a game goes, this one is pretty damn hard to top.

Joe

Craig Oxbrow

05-17-2004, 08:40 AM

I'd suggest posting the picture of Cat imitating Derek's haircut, but I don't want her to kill me. :D

Coffee_Lifeform

05-17-2004, 12:25 PM

Originally posted by Joe Dizzy
One of the things which don't translate into the write-up, but which were part of what made this episode so much fun were the players impersonating other players bits...

Absolutely. And for the record, Derek doesn't flirt with everything female, Jamie's not a complete space cadet, I actually am funny and Joe's not at all domineering. :D

Originally posted by Craig Oxbrow
I'd suggest posting the picture of Cat imitating Derek's haircut, but I don't want her to kill me. :D

I might not kill you!

No, actually, you're right, I probably would.

Mytholder

05-17-2004, 03:25 PM

Craig, post it and I'll sticky this thread at the top of the forum for a week.... :-P

Craig Oxbrow

05-17-2004, 05:10 PM

Hmm.

On the one hand, increased readership.

On the other hand, being beaten to death with a shovel.

Hmm.

I think I'll pass, cheers. :D

colbabe

05-17-2004, 06:16 PM

Originally posted by Craig Oxbrow
Alfred: To quote Larry, wouldn't it be easier to simply act, dear boy?
Probably Larry's most classic moment. I love it. There's a goodly amount of disdain for Method down under too.
Shawn: You know your character's an icon in the lesbian community.
Sophia: WHAT? Oh God! The pink! It all comes with the pink!
Alfred: Breathe, darling, breathe...
-kicks self for not seeing it before-

Good ep, my man.

Craig Oxbrow

05-27-2004, 02:48 PM

The Watch House 2.13: Light From A Dead Star

Milli: punkette angst-fuelled Watcher trainee
Ziggy: badass sorcerer and son of supervillain, genuinely concerned about Milli
Jake: psychic civilian currently feeling rather guilty and lost
William: Mister Watcher Trainee
Andy: quiet unassuming hereditary lycanthrope, in control, oh yeah, you betcha
Sunita: Watchers' Council very proper teaching assistant

(Absentee)
Jack: rugby-playing civilian, fallen back in with the Watch

(NPC)
Escher: dour but fatherly Watchers' trainer
Emma: Jake's broken-hearted spellcasting ex
Margot: Watchers' Council fairly slapdash teaching assistant
Charlotte: William's civilian girlfriend

Benjamin: Ziggy's father, ruthless businessman and killer warlock
Thomas: Ziggy's brother and right hand man
Adelia: Ziggy's sister, loyalty to her father seemingly less than 100%

Previously, on The Watch House:

Skel and Ziggy trading lightning bolts. Skel being killed by Benjamin.

Jake being possessed, charming Emma, hypnotising and kissing Sunita, knocking Charlotte out and kissing Milli.

Emma in tears.
Jake: We split up.
Milli: Oh. Right. Bollocks... I'll sort it out.

Escher: Mister Travers is of the opinion that Ziggy's presence is a threat to us.
Milli: So, what?
Escher: He suggested a more protected location for him.
Milli: (worried) Sending him away?
Escher: Or... cutting him loose.

Adelia: I'm not 'ere to fight. I'm 'ere to offer you a deal.
Milli: A deal. Why would I want to make a deal with you?
Adelia: You're Ziggy's friend. I thought you might be able to talk some sense into him.
Milli: What do you mean? I can't do that. Well, I could, but I don't have that much time in my life...
Adelia: Before 'e left, Ziggy was mystically empowered, above an' beyond the normal power in our family... And now 'e's left the family behind, our father wants the power back.
Milli: So, you can just take away his power?
Adelia: Yes.
Milli: And you say you could or would do this without hurting him?
Adelia: I have no reason to lie.
Milli: Or to tell me any of this.

--

We open with Jake sitting in his new room, surrounded by unpacked boxes. After all, it's a matter of weeks until the end of term, so why unpack? He sets his guitar aside and scribbles some notes on a sheet of paper, then returns to playing.

Sunita and Margot having tea and looking over the group's files.

Margot: Well, it's been a pretty strange year, all round. I mean, normally we'd have a couple Prentices, maybe a couple more students to keep an eye on, do a bit of patrolling, investigate a haunted house or two... whereas this year, well, it's just lucky the "keep an eye on" group ended up as allies or we'd really be in trouble. Do you think Mister Travers appreciates that?
Sunita: Probably not, no.

Jack lobs a rugby ball across the practice room, slamming it into the dummy's head.

Andy glancing across the classroom at the blackboard.

Andy: Seen all this before, can't be arsed... sorry, did I say that out loud?

William and Charlotte having a picnic on the riverbank. She looks over to him with a wistful expression.

Charlotte: Time's running out...
William: Hm?
Charlotte: Papers to hand in, tickets for the ball on sale, I know you've had more to do lately...
William: Yeah, I've been busy...
Charlotte: I've hardly seen you since I got that bump on the head...
William: Yeah... Um, I'll have to get tickets to the ball.

Milli watching Emma prepare a spell.

Emma: Now, I say this and... look away... "lumen!"

Milli duly looks away as the room is filled with dazzling white light.

Emma: Now this one I can do!
Milli: Cool. That could come in very useful.

Then they look up at a knock on the door. It's Ziggy.

Escher pacing in front of a class.

Escher: After the debacle of the Fourth Crusade, the treasures of ancient Byzantium were in large part shipped to Venice to pay the Crusaders' war debt. The great horses from the arena can still be seen in Saint Mark's Square. Furthermore, the exodus of Orthodox artisans spread across eastern Europe. You can find clearly Byzantine murals in chapels in Romania to this day. And so the culture that had been crushed by its supposed defenders lived on, as booty or as thanks for sanctuary...

He pauses to look over the class, nodding to William, and appears not to notice Adelia sitting in the front row, taking notes. The camera swings around to look at her notepad.
"Michael Escher. Watcher tutor. Widower. Protects students. Knowledgeable. Poss. useful. Follow."

CREDITS!

Craig Oxbrow

05-27-2004, 02:52 PM

We cut back to Milli and Ziggy.

Ziggy: So... umm... you're here, then?
Milli: Yes, where else would I be? Can't help but notice you're here too. At the moment.
Ziggy: Still... working on that... spell thing, right?
Milli: Yeah. It's preventative against the Roots family. All the Roots family.
Ziggy: Right. So... uh... need any help?
Milli: (calls back inside) Emma? Do we need a hand?
Emma: Um, I guess we could do with one.
Milli: (to Ziggy) Nah, everything's under control.
Ziggy: So, you can deal with whatever it is they'll throw at you?
Milli: (looks down) ... Probably not. I guess we could use the extra help.

She steps aside to let him in. He looks around uncomfortably.

Ziggy: Nice room. You have windows, that's... that's nice. Letting in light and stuff. Big and see-through. Which is good. The see-through thing, I mean.

He looks out, sees Andy being chased by his maths supervisor, and says nothing.

Emma: Um, right. Hi.
Ziggy: So, how is that... infusing of weapons thing coming along? Infused any... umm... weapons?
Milli: Well, this one.

And she takes out her enchanted sword and points it an inch away from Ziggy's throat.

Milli: See it? Pretty, isn't it?
Ziggy: Very. Have you tried crossbow bolts or stakes?
Milli: We were just getting to that.
Emma: Yeah.

Mill puts the sword away. Ziggy looks at her, then at Emma and tries to smile.

Ziggy: Right. Could I have a word in private?
Milli: With me? (looks mildly annoyed, and then confused) Uh, sure.
Emma: I'll make some coffee.

As she passes the window, the math supervisor runs past, chased by a large creature that may be a dog...

Ziggy: So. (pause, looks at everything else in the room but Milli) How are things?
Milli: I'm absolutely desperately overworked, I don't get paid for this, and I'm probably gonna fail my course. (snappily) Otherwise great!
Ziggy: (not really listening) Great is good...
Milli: I think so.
Ziggy: Hm. What do you know about the facilities the Council has access to? Buildings, offices... crypts?
Milli: Oh, well, there are libraries here, in Oxford and the main building in London, a few field offices around the country and in Europe, the Academy, Watchers here and there all over... Why?
Ziggy: Well, basically I'm...
Milli: (annoyed) Leaving?!
Ziggy: What? Why? How did you know?
Milli: (quietly) Mister Escher told me.

Ziggy nods slightly.

Milli: As did your sister. Had quite a long chat with me, in fact.
Ziggy: Are you okay?
Milli: Fine. Had my magic sword with me. Coulda taken her. And she's not really the problem anyway, is she?
Ziggy: Right... she's not... So I guess you wouldn't mind, then?
Milli: Mind? What's there to mind?
Ziggy: Me being dragged into that crap.
Milli: I'd mind a helluva lot more if it was you telling me, instead of everyone else! Why can't you just tell me what's going on for once?!

Ziggy stares at her.

Ziggy: I'm sorry, alright? I'm on the run here! Everybody's out to kill me. It might sound cool but it really, really isn't! You have to run away from everything and everyone! You can't stop anywhere. Cause if you do, they'll kill you!
Milli: I understand...
Ziggy: And the one time I do stop, and make friends, your people try to put me in jail!
Milli: We're not trying to put you in jail -
Ziggy: The Watchers are. They're the people that are supposed to protect me!
Milli: We're protecting you now.
Ziggy: Right.

He slouches against the wall. Milli looks furious for a minute, then takes a deep breath before speaking.

Milli: (gently) What's wrong with you?
Ziggy: I'm scared out of my mind! That's what's wrong with me. I can't sleep at night! Cause I'm sure that any minute the Council's gonna burst in through my door and drag me into one of your damn English dungeons. I... I... just don't know what to do anymore... I can handle Skel, you can handle things that are non-Skel. But... the Watchers' Council? What the hell am I supposed to do about them?
Milli: (downcast) To be honest, I really don't know anymore.

Ziggy looks up and into Milli's eyes.

Ziggy: We're friends, right? We are friends?

Milli nods emphatically.

Ziggy: And, you said that friends help each other out.
Milli: Of course! You think I'm gonna just let somebody take you away from me?
Ziggy: You seemed okay with it earlier...
Milli: I was just mad. You shoulda said something earlier.
Ziggy: I just did... Look... it's the Watchers that are doing this. The people that promised me they would protect me. Trust is kind of an issue here.
Milli: That's them, not us.
Ziggy: You're a Watcher.
Milli: Yeah, but... do you think I'm going to be loyal to the institution that turned my parents into what they are and want me to be the same? When they come to take one of my friends away? Do you really think I'd choose them over you?
Ziggy: (quietly) Okay. So as a friend I'm asking you... help me.
Milli: Sorry I was snappy. But you're not the only one who's worried about what's going to happen to you. Remember that. No matter who comes, or what they try to do, I'll be there.

Ziggy nods, exhales and straightens up again.

Ziggy: Right. I'll go and look something up for infusing your weapons.
Milli: Right. Thanks.
Ziggy: (calls out) I'm gonna go and have a long nap... Kidding!

Emma steps out, carrying some coffee mugs. Ziggy nods vaguely and gesticulates to the door as he goes. Em turns to Milli with a "what was that all about?" expression. Milli shrugs "dunno".

Jake continues to work on his new song. William and Charlotte cram in the library. Andy chews on his pen in lectures. Emma and Milli shift between research and revision. Then eventually Milli looks at her watch.

Emma: Checking in?
Milli: Yeah.

They head over to find most of the group assembling in Escher's office. Jake arrives, looks for a seat, and doesn't avoid anyone as such...

Escher: Of course I appreciate that the academic year is drawing to a close, that you have lives outwith our tutelage.
Milli: Do we? Oh, er, yes we do.
Andy: It's not like we get Christmas off. But hey, the forces of darkness gotta have a break sometime.
Escher: However, the threats to our existence are only becoming more numerous and prominent. Our conflict with the Roots family and its agents is liable to reach a head sooner rather than later. There is only so much we can do to prepare, but we must do all we can.
Milli: Right. Yes.
Ziggy: And congratulations from graduating from the school of the blindingly obvious!
Jake: What? (looking up from scribbling in a notebook)

Sunita takes notes towards a presentation urging the Council to let Ziggy stay in situ.

As the group gather weapons, and William fixes a small laser sight to his crossbow, Jake approaches Milli.

Jake: You still busy with your books?
Milli: Yeah, working pretty hard. The three of us are getting results.
Jake: And you're patrolling? You aren't still studying instead?
Milli: No, I just didn't go while the witches were around.
Jake: Right. You okay then?
Milli: I'm okay really. Working. (looks over at Emma) Can't guarantee Em's gonna come.
Jake: Oh, probably not.
Milli: But I'm ready to go.
Jake: Probably with Emma?
Milli: Yeah.

Milli: You coming?
Emma: Sure. Hmm... this is kind of a big group. Maybe we should split up?
Milli: Let's see what's out there first, okay?

As they proceed, there's some shop talk.

Ziggy: You'll be delighted to hear I made a breakthrough. But there's a drawback.
Milli: (warily) Okay, what's the breakthrough and what's the drawback?
Ziggy: Well, I found a tome with references to infusing weapons and destroying shields, the drawback being that most of them need some form of... *cough*ritualvirginsacrifice*cough*... but other than that... it's fine.
Milli: That's not really a drawback so much as us not doing it.
Ziggy: Yeah, I thought you might say that. I was trying out this English understatement-thing. Probably not the right time for it.
Milli: Over here we don't sacrifice -
Andy: You could try chicken. That's what you do in Voodoo, right?
Ziggy: We're gonna need a lot of chicken for that, but yes.
Milli: I don't even like the chicken thing. Part of the whole vegetarian deal.
Ziggy: Ah, well, you don't eat the chicken after.
Emma: That actually makes it worse.
Milli: Yeah, then you're just killing the chicken for the sacrifice...
Ziggy: Well, yeah, it's a sacrifice, not a barbecue. Well, anyway. The thing is, barrier spells are basically beneficial, so breaking them is dark magic. Dark magic tends to need blood.
Milli: Oh, I've got tons of blood. Don't use most of it. But the killing, not so good.
Andy: Hey, if you're looking for volunteers to give blood... I'm sure you'll find some. But not me. Why are you looking at me? I hate the sight of blood. Like, AAAARGHH!

Andy runs off into the darkness, screaming. Everyone watches him go.

Milli: Boy's got issues.
William: He's getting stranger.
Emma: (sarcastic) Yeah. Normally he was always the rock we clung to for stability.
Sunita: Maybe someone should go after him?
Emma: We should split up. Somebody should keep patrolling.
Jake: I'll go with Milli.
Emma: I wanna go with Milli...
Milli: The three of us can go. And you guys can keep up the patrol.

And so the triangle sets off to find Andy.

Jake: (quietly sarcastic) Thank you.

Milli happily gives him two thumbs up and winks conspiratorially at him. And they proceed, with Emma staying closer to Milli, until they round a corner... and Adelia steps out in front of them.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

05-27-2004, 02:53 PM

Milli draws her sword. Adelia puts her hands in the air.

Milli: You being unarmed gets you five more minutes to live.
Adelia: Nice to see you too.

Emma isn't sure who to hide behind. Milli gently guides her back, towards Jake.

Adelia: Somet'ing you might want to know. Thomas is looking for a Night Star crystal.
Jake: Which is what?
Emma: Oh, it allows delayed long-distance channelling of spells that need contact otherwise.
Adelia: Exactly.
Milli: And what does he want that for? It would be very bad if you tell me he's after it, but not why. That kinda thing pisses me off.
Adelia: As you know, there are two plans. Either could be 'elped by the crystal, but Thomas would obviously use it for his.
Jake: Where's he looking for it?
Adelia: He's following rumours and second-hand reports. We don't have many agents here, so he may have to gather it himself.
Milli: What, I thought you had lots of agents working for Skel.
Adelia: You didn't know? Our father killed him for trying to kill Ziggy.

The three of them blink in surprise.

Emma: Oh.
Adelia: He takes the protection of our family very seriously.
Jake: Well, we wouldn't really get to hear about that, what with not exactly being on speaking terms with your father and all.
Milli: ... He... killed him...

She hides a shiver at the thought of someone so dangerous being killed apparently casually.

Jake: What's in it for you, telling us?
Adelia: As I tol' Miss Blackhurst, I want Ziggy safe.
Milli: So you keep saying.
Jake: How many of these crystals are there?
Adelia: We only know about one at the moment.
Jake: So, where are you staying? So we can get in touch.
Adelia: I'd be 'appy to tell you, but I don' want to be killed in my bed.
Milli: Oh, we won't kill you.
Adelia: And my father?
Milli: Well, yeah, I do want to kill your father...
Adelia: You see the problem?
Jake: I see your problem.
Adelia: (narrows eyes) Well. Anyway. With your resources, you should be able to find the crystal before he does.

And with that, she steps back and vanishes into the darkness.

Emma: Buh... buh...
Milli: I hate it when they do that!
Jake: You spent time investigating teleportation spells, right?
Emma: Buh...!
Milli: Yeah.
Jake: Their power level, ranges, how to cancel them.
Milli: Don't look at me, this is Emma's area.

Emma smiles nervously and goes back to looking around warily. Jake looks over, carefully not making eye contact.

Jake: Can you do some checking?
Emma: (also not making eye contact) Uh, sure.

Milli: Why does she keep talking to me?
Jake: She's done this before? How long ago?
Milli: A couple weeks. When the witches were around.
Jake: And what'd she say then?
Milli: That her dad and her brother - her other brother - were trying to do a little spell and they need Ziggy. They need a spare or something. Em has a much better idea what they want.
Emma: I do?
Milli: That was pretty much it. They don't care if he lives or dies. She says she wants to keep him alive. She wants him to give himself up. I don't really think so.
Jake: Did you speak to him about it?
Milli: No. But I think he kinda has an idea. I know they're only gonna get Ziggy over my dead body.
Emma: I don't think that'd be a moral problem for them...
Milli: Think I'm gonna kick her the next time. It's starting to get annoying. Might stop her coming to see me, at least...

Meanwhile, the other group finds Andy.

Andy: I, uh, thought I saw a cat.

Emma: I don't think this was teleportation. I think she just went invisible.
Jake: So we can follow her.
Emma: (scared) And also, she could be right here watching us...

Jake calls Andy as Milli looks around warily and Emma finds a wall to keep her back to.

Andy: Yo?
Jake: Hey, could you get to the corner of... where are we... Bodley... and bring your nose. We need to track someone.

Ziggy: What the hell was that?
Andy: That was Jake.
Ziggy: No, I mean, you answer your phone with "yo"?
Andy: We need to get over there... sometime in the next three weeks.
Sunita: (dryly) We'd better hurry then...

Andy charges off. The others head for the bus stop.

Jake, Emma and Milli stand around looking uncomfortable. Eventually, our heroes meet up.

Ziggy: I took a shortcut called the bus.
Milli: Don't you still owe me money for the bus?
Ziggy: I got you a magic bracelet.
Milli: It was my birthday. I deserved a bracelet.
Ziggy: You deserve a spanking. So what's up?
Jake: Guess who turned up? Your kid sister.
Milli: Again.
Emma: And she might still be here, being all invisible.
Ziggy: (looks around) She isn't.

Jake looks to Andy.

Jake: Can you pick up scents from the area, or do you need something like... (stifles a laugh) police dogs?
Andy: Hmph.
Jake: (trying not to laugh) Sorry.
Andy: Well, anyway, not getting a strong scent.
Ziggy: Yeah, invisibility spell. Might cover scents as well.
Jake: So she's close. Probably in town.
Milli: So what'd she do? Where'd she go?
Ziggy: She put on her plus-two cloak of concealment and ran.
Milli: Huh?
Jake: What's he talking about?
Ziggy: She did with the magic. And then she ran. (mutters) Philistines.

Jake ponders something and stops smiling.

Jake: So they still know how to find us.
Milli: We're not exactly hard to find when we're out patrolling.
Jake: But we don't use maps or standard routes... Sorry Sunita. (to Ziggy) Can you cast a spell to cover us? Cover our tracks?
Ziggy: See... the problem with that is... if you keep using magic it can cause a power imbalance in the area. Spells are more likely to backfire, weird stuff is more likely to happen, that kind of thing. I do have a good shot at finding her.
Jake: Good. Time we stopped letting them find us. Set a watch on them. Not rely on little sister dropping by to drop hints.
Emma: We should look into the hint too though.
Milli: Yeah, we need to find that first.
Sunita: Sorry, find what?
Emma: A Night Star crystal. Channels spells over distances.
Milli: Where do we find something like that?
Ziggy: Well, this being the Nineties I'd suggest eBay... but I'm sure the Watchers will have lists.
Milli: Right. We look through the books.
William: And I'll check eBay!

Everyone looks at William. He grins.

Milli: Maybe you could help with the books?
William: Right. (smirks)
Jake: Hmm. If they know where we are, and we have it...
Ziggy: I'm for destroying it.
Jake: We need to stop them watching us first.
Emma: We need to find it before they do.
Jake: We need to stop them watching us.
Milli: No, no. We're not ready to go near them yet. So we need to get the crystal and destroy it.
Emma: Yeah.

Jake pauses, glancing at Emma as if trying to work out what she's thinking, then turns to Milli.

Jake: Are you ready for a big fight?
Milli: We aren't.
Jake: Then I guess we gotta be quick.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

05-27-2004, 02:55 PM

The group head off to check with Escher.

Ziggy: So she visited you again?
Milli: It does seem to be me she speaks with...

In the office, Escher takes down a logbook and looks through it.

Escher: We came into possession of one about a century ago. We seem to have lost it...

Milli cradles her head in her hands.

Escher: ... during the reorganisation of the colleges after the First World War. It may still be on campus.
Ziggy: This is like that Indiana Jones game where you need to find that small statue in the college!
Milli: Is that a GameBoy game?
Ziggy: Nope, PC. I've upgraded!
Milli: Good for you. Anyway... we have to find this thing. (turns to Escher) How big is it? Tell me it's the size of a small room.
Escher: More like a large paperweight.
Milli: Damn.
Escher: I rather hope we could keep track of something the size of a room...
Andy: So was it part of a collection?
Escher: It was held in my predecessor's office.
William: Well, it'd be long gone by now. Students would have stolen it for extra credit.
Ziggy: Extra credit for stealing?
William: No, for returning it.
Milli: (to Ziggy) Sure you haven't taken it?
Ziggy: Wow, no matter how often I hear that joke it never starts being funny.
Milli: I think it's funny.
Ziggy: We've discussed this "definition of funny" before...

Sunita reads over the crystal's specifics.

Ziggy: I'm going to find a spell to find it and destroy it.
Emma: One spell to do both?
Ziggy: Sure. Thanks to my family I know it works with people...
Emma: Oh.
Ziggy: But the drawback is... I don't know how intelligent the spell would be. It might not be smart enough not to destroy everything in its path.
Escher: That is quite a drawback.
Milli: Yeah, it is. As usual... You don't have a spell to bring it here, do you? Like to stretch out and take it?
Ziggy: Not on me.

William: So, if it was moved to a different department, which one? Geology?
Escher: The stone was worked, so possibly Archaeology. Perhaps the departmental museum.
Milli: Okay, we need to try those.
Escher: It's almost ten.
Milli: Can you get us in?
Escher: Possibly...
Milli: Let's go. Emma, you coming?
Emma: Okay...

Heading over to the Geology department, Jake gets a phone call and mumbles:

Jake: Gig... next week? Right, okay.

Milli calls Escher, to see if he's arranged a way in.

Escher: I'm en route to the Archaeology department actually.

He doesn't notice Adelia fall into step close behind him, moving quietly and glancing around warily. Then she draws a forked dagger, raises it behind his back... and turns to face a third figure stepping out of the shadows behind the Watcher. The vampire looks at her, growls, and turns to pursue Escher. Adelia stabs it in the back, the blade glows briefly, and the vampire shatters into dust. Adelia straightens up and watches Escher go, stowing her dagger away with a smile.

Milli, meanwhile, nods to Jake.

Milli: He's working on it.

Jake nods and takes a look at the lock.

Milli: So, William, how are things going with Charlotte?
William: Oh, very well. She's okay after that knock on the head. (glances at Jake) Little worried about term papers, of course. But we're looking forward to the Mingle.
Milli: Oh, right! Sunita, are you going to the Mingle?
Sunita: Oh, well, I hadn't thought...

As Mill distracts the TA, Jake opens the door.

Jake: It was unlocked!
Sunita: That's lucky.
Jake: Yeah. After you.
Sunita: No, please, go ahead...

Ziggy walks along the row of trays of crystals, eyes narrowed.

Ziggy: Nope.

Escher reaches the Museum of Archaeology and discusses the find with the manager, Mr. Grayling.

Grayling: Ah yes. Rounded crystal, dark surface with reflective layers underneath. Found it in a Roman villa in Dorset, about a hundred years ago. History department had it for a while.
Escher: Right.
Grayling: After that prank stealing the chalice a few weeks ago we've had to recheck security. You know how it is.

... As Jake closes the door he picked the lock of and the group head across the court to the museum. Nobody notices three stealthy figures following them... and Milli doesn't look down at her bracelet as the red gem glows dimly...

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

05-27-2004, 02:57 PM

The Watch pass the inevitable dinosaur skeleton in the departmental foyer. Escher steers Grayling away and nods to Milli to proceed. Ziggy closes his eyes, and they open jet black.

Ziggy: Third floor.

The group head upstairs, Milli taking out her crossbow and looking around warily, keeping Ziggy covered as he looks around the cluttered stockroom. Jake, meanwhile, hears something and slips out towards the stairwell. Andy follows him. Milli looks up as Andy goes, checks her crossbow, and notices the dim glow from her bracelet. Vampires. Nearby, but not close...

Emma: This it?
Ziggy: Yes...

She holds up a blackened crystal with lines glinting white from inside it.

Jake stands on the balcony overlooking the foyer, glancing down as three men in dark clothes sneak across the floor. One of them looks up, revealing a monstrous snarl.

Jake: You reckon we could take three?
Andy: I'm up for a challenge. You go ahead and get their attention, I'll sneak up behind them.
Jake: That works better the other way.
Andy: Huh? Oh, yeah. Right. Hang on, remembering to take my shirt off this time...

Andy rushes downstairs and confronts the vamps.

Andy: Hello Mister Wicked Demon Guy! I'm completely helpless! I'm not even wearing a shirt!
First Vampire: Uh... Okay...

The vampires look rather disconcerted by this idea.

Andy: This is the part where I kill you all horribly. Who wants to go first?
First Vampire: I think you do.

They charge. Andy Hulks out. They retreat. He grabs one and smashes it headfirst into the dinosaur skeleton, beheading it with the mooring cables. The second runs off to find Jake waiting. He holds a stake loosely in his hand... concentrates... and it floats up and flies through the vampire's heart. Jake smiles thinly, then shouts across to Andy as he corners the third.

Jake: Catch it, don't kill it! We need one to question!

Andy grabs the remaining vamp and lifts it off the ground. Jake picks up his stake and approaches.

Jake: Why are you here?
Third Vamp: Steal something.
Jake: Why?
Third Vamp: Scary Wizard Guy told us to do it.
Jake: How are you inside the Shield?
Third Vamp: Scary Wizard Guy...

The vamp looks up to the third floor. Jake looks up and sees a figure gazing down. Thomas. He tuts, snaps his fingers... and the vampire is torn free of Andy's grip and crashes into the nearest wall, exploding in a shower of dust.

Meanwhile, Ziggy grits his teeth as he grips the crystal, which glows and crackles, then relaxes.

Ziggy: Okay, that isn't working.
Thomas: Mind if I try?

Thomas strides out of thin air and grabs the crystal.

Ziggy: Thomas, still bald and ugly I see...
Thomas: Good to see you as well.

Ziggy steps back, then grabs his brother and hisses "sleep". Thomas blinks, shakes his head... and then punches Ziggy across the room.

He's still shaky, but manages to dodge Milli and William's crossbow bolts, shove Sunita aside and round on Emma as she stammers the words to the light spell.

Emma: L-lu...
Milli: Do something!
Emma: I - I - what?

Milli uses the distraction to draw her sword and bring it down on Thomas's hand. He blocks the slash with the crystal, and it splits in two.

Thomas looks down at the fallen halves of the crystal, glares at Milli, and leaves without another word, sinking through the floor as Jake and Andy burst in. Andy pauses, blinks in disbelief, and goes back to buttoning his shirt.

Ziggy groans and Sunita helps him up. Emma shivers and stares at the floor. Milli screams in rage and smashes the crystal into powder with the pommel of her sword.

Emma: G-good plan.
William: So it's over.
Ziggy: Milli, it's over. We won. For now.

Mill straightens up and looks down at the sword.

Milli: Last time this cuts through their spells. Just add that to our really long list of problems.
Ziggy: Forget about that for a moment. We won. It doesn't matter how we did it. We're still here. That's all that matters right now.
Milli: Back to the drawing board.
Emma: Maybe. But you only hit the crystal, and he was kinda woozy.

Milli nods slightly but doesn't look convinced. Ziggy tries to give her a reassuring smile. But his eyes are still jet black.

Thomas steps out of the back wall of the museum, stumbles over to a waiting Mercedes, and topples into the back, rubbing his eyes and trying to suppress a yawn.

Emma: So, where did you go?
Jake: There were vamps downstairs, but we dealt with 'em.
Emma: Well... good.
Milli: Pub. Need something to cheer me up.
Andy: (brightly) I can chase my tail!
Milli: Nah, that's okay.

The group stumble into the pub.

Ziggy: So, what do you want to do?
Milli: Get a drink. Something strong.
Sunita: I'll get the drinks, shall I?

Jake: Dude. See the way we trashed those vamps?
Andy: That was a nice throw with the stake by the way.
Jake: Uh... yeah. Thanks.

Milli checks under the table.

Jake: What are you doing?
Milli: Just making sure there aren't any bugs.
Jake: Yeah. They do seem to know exactly where we are. All the time.
William: They're just playing with us, aren't they?
Emma: Maybe...
Milli: Time we started playing back.

And we cut to Thomas stalking back into the family home from home, entering his father's study and standing before him.

Thomas: The crystal is lost to us now, thanks to Ezekiel's friends. They may not be powerful, but there are too many of them. (angrily) I'm sure that they wouldn't miss one or two...

His father smiles coldly.

Benjamin: No need to worry on it. This simply means that we will need my estranged son to be present for the alignment, rather than drawing his power from a more convenient distance. Of course, this does mean that he must be separated from his circle of protectors...

Adelia enters, dressed to the nines and made up to emphasise her dark eyes. She smiles as she steps up to her father's seat.

Adelia: I have an idea there...

CREDITS!
GRR! ARG!

Craig Oxbrow

05-27-2004, 02:57 PM

Escher V/O: Next time on The Watch House:

Jake playing his guitar.

Milli looking up from a staked vampire.

Milli: We have to find them.

Adelia standing in Andy's doorway, smiling cheerfully as Andy backs away warily.

Escher shouting at a thin-faced man in a conservative suit.

Escher: I'll go to the Council!
Thin Man: I come from the Council.

Jake on stage.

Emma turning away, close to tears.

Milli looking open-mouthed at Ziggy...

Escher V/O: The next episode of The Watch House is Falling Apart.

--
Actual Play bit

This was a short and rushed episode. More rushed than it had to be. We could have gone on for another hour and had a lot more of the fun character banter that really makes TWH work. As is, this was another "advance the plot" episode. Next week I'm definitely putting the brakes on the episode pacing to keep the game fun.

I'd entirely forgotten about the museum being inside the Shield until Jake asked about it. Fortunately, "a wizard did it" really does work as an excuse for a continuity screwup in a fantasy game when there's a wizard around...

Craig Oxbrow

06-09-2004, 02:36 PM

The Watch House 2.14: Falling Apart

Milli: punkette angst-fuelled Watcher trainee
Ziggy: badass sorcerer and son of supervillain, genuinely concerned about Milli
Jake: psychic civilian currently feeling rather guilty and lost
Sunita: Watchers' Council very proper teaching assistant

(Absentee)
William: Mister Watcher Trainee
Andy: quiet unassuming hereditary lycanthrope, in control, oh yeah, you betcha
Jack: comes and goes like the wind

(NPC)
Escher: dour but fatherly Watchers' trainer
Emma: Jake's broken-hearted spellcasting ex
Margot: Watchers' Council fairly slapdash teaching assistant
Charlotte: William's civilian girlfriend
Adelia: Ziggy's sister, loyalty to her father seemingly less than 100%
Tessa, Rachel, Lawrence, Sophie, Rosalind, Henry, Ginny: bystanders

Previously, on The Watch House:

Ziggy looking concerned as Milli gazes at Jake.
Emma trying to comfort her as she looks close to tears.

Ziggy: I think he's kinda messing you around...

Emma and Jake together as she says:

Emma: I love you.

Jake not responding.

Jake kissing Milli.
Emma running off in tears.

Emma: I'm... going to need some time.

Thomas leading three vampires into the Museum of Archaeology and Anthropology.

The group battling Thomas, Milli smashing the Night Star crystal, and him retreating.

William: They're just playing with us, aren't they?
Emma: Maybe...
Milli: Time we started playing back.

--

We open in a dank, gloomy crypt, as four vampires drag a screaming young man inside.

First Vamp: We need to keep our strength up. I'm sorry the guys got wasted, but we gotta be on a full tank if we're gonna get out of town before the wizard comes back an' tries to get us to do somethin' for him.

Outside, Andy sniffs the air, turns to the rest of the patrolling group and nods.

Andy: The vamps from last night came from here as well.
Emma: Sounds like the rest of them don't know much.
Milli: Right.
Sunita: After you, gentlemen?

Milli takes that as her cue to kick the door in and charge inside.

Jake: Everybody freeze!
Ziggy: Dude, no, I get to say that line!
First Vamp: Oh, bollocks...

Clearly this isn't an offer to surrender, so Milli fires her crossbow into the first vamp's chest. He dodges and get the bolt a bit off from the heart.

First Vamp: OW!
Milli: Yeah, I know...

TWANG EEEYYA WHOOMF!

The other three scatter as their leader, well, scatters. Andy wolfs out and rips one in two, Jake stakes a second, and the last one leaps for a high window, slams into a mystical barrier and slides down to the floor.

Emma: Holding spell seems to work.
Milli: Good.
William: Now, there was something about a wizard?
Last Vamp: Look, I don't know anything! We didn't wanna work for the bastard, did we?

With that, he charges forwards and Milli dusts him with another crossbow bolt.

William goes over to check on the victim.

William: He's just stunned.
Ziggy: Let's wake him up.
Milli: Here?
Ziggy: He can take it.
Milli: He's kind of an innocent in all this.
Sunita: Well, er, do we take him to the bar?
Jake: And leave him in the gutter? Let's just go.
Ziggy: So I'm the only one that cares?
Milli: It's not that we don't care, but what do we do?
Ziggy: We put him in his room.
Jake: Fine. You get his legs. Hey... how come we never see vampires with widows' peaks and capes?
Milli: Capes are for flying. The locals are too cheap for them...

With the student safe in his room, our heroes go to the pub.

Jake: Right, who wants what? Sunita, you want something light? One of those cocktail-in-a-bottle things? Pink, green, yellow?
Milli: I'll have my usual black one, thanks.
Jake: Guinness it is, then.
Milli: Ah, no, a little whisky and coke?
Jake: Yer no fun.
Sunita: I'll get something myself...

They pass Fionula arguing with her course supervisor on the phone, and note Tessa and Rachel standing as far from each other as the bar will allow.

Sunita: Well, two bar staff at completely opposite ends...

Ziggy goes over and asks Tessa:

Ziggy: You two alright?

She responds with the raised hand of Don't Ask. He heads back to the group and shrugs. Milli gets up and goes to ask.

Milli: What's going on?
Tessa: Don't ask.
Milli: You know I can sit here and whine all night.
Tessa: Right, well... (turns to another customer) that'll be one-forty, please.
Milli: Tessa.
Tessa: She started it!
Milli: Started what?
Tessa: She told Sophie that Amelia likes Lawrence.
Milli: Uh-huh...?
Tessa: After she said she wouldn't.
Milli: And...?
Tessa: She said she wouldn't! She's always stirring!
Milli: And?
Tessa: Does she understand why I'm not talking to her? Can you make it absolutely plain?
Milli: Oh. Well, just thought it might be something interesting.

Tessa doesn't notice the jibe. She immediately goes back to looking daggers at Rachel...

CREDITS!
Written by Oxbrow, Dizzy, Tobin and Robertson

Craig Oxbrow

06-09-2004, 03:35 PM

Milli returns to find Jake and Ziggy concentrating, staring at a pencil stub on the table.

Milli: Well, they're fighting over you.
Ziggy: Buh?
Jake: No way!

And as Jake looks over, the pencil flies up and bounces off his forehead.

Milli: Obviously, you'll have to get a round in from each of them.
Emma: I'm not involved, so I could help. But I don't wanna.
Ziggy: So I have to get her to talk to her and her to her...
Milli: Okay, now I'm confused.

Ziggy and Jake play Rock Paper Scissors to decide who goes near the warring bar staff. Milli sits by Emma.

Milli: So apparently they're fighting because Rachel told Sophie about Amelia liking Lawrence.
Emma: First I'd heard about it... don't know why it has anything to do with them...
Milli: I don't either. Oh, are you gonna go to Jake's gig?
Emma: I guess...
Milli: You should.

Having drawn on one each, Ziggy and Jake both go to the bar.

Ziggy: So you and Emma have gone the way of the dodo?
Jake: Yeah, you're a bit behind.
Ziggy: I picked it up alright. I was wondering just how dodo.
Jake: Pretty much.

Su approaches the bar, clearly planning an intervention.

Ziggy: I asked them what was wrong, and they went all... (the hand of Don't Ask)

Jake shrugs and heads over to the jukebox as Ziggy returns to the booth. Jake calls to the bar:

Jake: Hey, does this have I Hate Everything About You?
Ziggy: Wow, I have to hand it to him, his choice in music is very dumb.

Emma's brow furrows.

Milli: You know it's just for Tessa and Rachel, right? Like a joke? Sort of...
Emma: Yeah, I know. (sighs)

Sunita: So, Rachel, have you done enough talking to know what you're not talking about? You seem like really good friends...
Rachel: She started it!

Ziggy: Maybe I should try asking again.
Milli: Stirring...
Ziggy: Gotta keep busy.
Milli: Yeah, not like you're studying.

The group reforms, as Jake passes Ginny pointedly turning away from Henry and approaches the table.

Sunita: So, quiet night...
Emma: Looks that way.
Ziggy: (looking up as Jake approaches) I don't know about that guy. Take it from me, he's a wanker.
Jake: Uh...
Ziggy: You are a wanker.
Milli: What... are you doing?
Ziggy: See, you had Emma. Perfectly nice girl...
Emma: Well, gee, thanks.
Ziggy: And then she got all fluffy bunny "I really really like you" and you bailed.
Sunita: (quickly) Emma, want to go and get a coffee? Milli?
Milli: (angrily) I don't think we should leave. I think Ziggy should go home.

Emma goes to the door. Milli stands to follow her.

Ziggy: Hey, at least now they're just mad at me.
Milli: It really bothers me that I can almost see a logic in that...

With that, she heads out after Emma. Ziggy turns to Jake with a shrug.

Jake: I know what you were trying to do...

The group splits, and the camera pulls back as they go their separate ways. It follows Milli catching up with Emma, walking home with her head bowed and shoulders slumped.

Milli: He was just trying to help... in his really, really stupid way. Everyone wants you two to work it out.
Emma: Except Jake.
Milli: That's really not true. He wouldn't still be around if he didn't want it to be okay. I mean, he went evil! He did some stuff he... shoulda not done... but he's really tried to make it up to -
Emma: Everyone else...
Milli: He just doesn't know what to say.
Emma: He knows not to say he loves me.
Milli: No... he's just embarrassed about what he did. You should talk to him. Sit him down... are you ready to go back?
Emma: I... I don't know.
Milli: I think you should decide. Talk to him... Promise me you'll talk to him.
Emma: I promise.

Milli gives her a light hug and a kiss on the cheek. She smiles weakly.

Ziggy heads over to the training room to maul the punchbag. Sunita revises her report on the group's activities again. William heads over to see Charlotte.

Charlotte: You're kind of late.
William: Well, I had things to do.
Charlotte: (narrows eyes slightly) ... okay.

Next morning, Emma looks at a handful of glittering dark sand.

Emma: There isn't enough of the crystal left to be traced... I don't think... but there's just about enough for a one-time use. Figured it might come in handy.
Milli: Are you sure it's safe?
Emma: Hey, it's me. If I didn't think it was safe I wouldn't want it anywhere near us.
Milli: Good. Um, anyway, I came over to ask if you wanted to go shopping after the meeting.
Emma: Um... okay?
Milli: Cool.

The group gathers for a morning meeting. No sign of Andy. Jake arrives late, rubbing his tired eyes.

Escher: Are you alright?
Jake: Yeah. Dreams have been getting less common... just not been sleeping. Busy.
Sunita: (trying not to sound suspicious) How?
Jake: Got a gig, y'know.
Milli: Speaking of, if there's nothing pressing, we're off to get new outfits.
Sunita: A shopping trip? Can I come along as well?
Milli: Sure. It's for tomorrow. Let's really make a night of it.

Jake looks at Milli and Emma a tad suspiciously.

Andy is delayed because, as he steps outside, Adelia approaches him, smiling cheerfully. He backs off.

Adelia: Hi. How are you?
Andy: Um...
Adelia: I was wondering...
Andy: Um?
Adelia: With this end of term ball coming up, if maybe you wanted t'go?
Andy: UM?!
Adelia: Well, of course, I wouldn' wan' you to do anything that makes you uncomfortable, an' we are on other sides, supposedly. But, well, I was 'opin' we could get past dat. You can understan' loyalty to family, right?
Andy: Um... well...
Adelia: Don't worry, you won' have to come in an' shake my father's hand or anything. (grins)

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

06-09-2004, 03:39 PM

Ziggy: So, Escher, pictures?
Escher: Pictures?
Ziggy: Newspapers, prophecies, anything?
Escher: Nothing immediate. Continue research into our overarching problem.
Ziggy: The environment? Pollution?
Escher: In a way. Magical pollution is one of the side effects...
Milli: Right. Well, shopping?
Escher: Do try and be back by four this afternoon, Miss Chadha. Mister Chase from Mister Travers's department is coming to discuss recent security concerns.
Milli: Oh, that'd be Ziggy.
Jake: Security for Ziggy or security of Ziggy?
Milli: The security issue that is Ziggy?
Jake: I mean, secure him or make him secure?
Escher: We shall see, I suppose...

Ziggy looks uncomfortable. Escher looks worried. Milli quickly breaks the silence.

Milli: Any luck with that magical trail?
Ziggy: Nothing conclusive. There are at least three other spellcasters we know about, probably one or two more. But where they are exactly, I have no idea.

William: So, should we come to this meeting?
Jake: We don't count. We don't have an opinion.
Milli: I've got an opinion!
Escher: I know. We'll make all your concerns clear.
Milli: I've got a proposition for you. If this guy tries to send Ziggy away we'll kill him.
Jake: Maybe put it a bit more diplomatically.
Milli: But something along those lines.
Escher: We'll see.
Milli: Okay. (brightens) So we've gotta go downtown and go shopping!

Cut to Emma stepping out of a changing room, wearing a strappy top and stretchy leather-effect trousers, and Milli standing up, her face instantly losing its bored expression.

Emma: Sure about this?
Milli: Wear those knee-high boots with it. He'll really like that outfit.
Emma: I dunno. The leather trousers, really not very me. More you...

Milli shakes her head emphatically.

Milli: No, not really.

Sunita comes out wearing an olive summer dress.

Sunita: Well?
Milli: Really nice. He'll like it.
Sunita: He?
Milli: You like Ziggy, right?

Su says nothing and pointedly looks at her reflection.

Milli: Come on...
Sunita: He's a little young for me.
Milli: You're, what, twenty-seven? He's like twenty-two. It's fine, okay? And we know he likes you too. Like the time he tried to get you drunk so you could talk -

Sunita makes a muffled whimpering sound and heads back into the changing room quickly.

Sunita: I'm going to try something a bit different. For a while.
Milli: Okay.

Sunita looks out again when Milli heads over to find a T-shirt.

Sunita: Well, what do you think?... Are you okay?
Emma: That's great, and oh God no.

Milli: Hey, you look really nice.
Emma: Are you gonna get anything?
Milli: Me? No, I've got clothes.
Sunita: You're a girl, you need more.
Milli: Uh...
Sunita: Anyway, what do you think of that? (points to a top)
Milli: Nice?
Emma: Try it on. Go on. Now...

At the pub over lunch, Jake sits opposite Ziggy and folds his arms.

Jake: What's up with you? Wanna explain that outburst?
Ziggy: I just think you should work out your differences or whatever. I'm just sick of all the negativity. It's painful just being in the vicinity of you people... Not to mention my own personal hang-ups...

And with perfect timing, in come Milli and Emma.

Ziggy: There I am trying not to be a complete asshole to, you know, 'people' and failing miserably.
Milli: Hi, can we...?
Jake: Just a sec.
Milli: So we'll go to the bar.

Milli puts Blur's Boys And Girls on the jukebox.

Milli: Bet they're talking about you...

Jake: What's eating at you? It's not just about us.
Ziggy: Nothing. I'm just standing there, trying to say something that doesn't piss her off... and then screw up and feel like I'd rather poke out my own eyes with a pitchfork.
Jake: What?
Ziggy: I... I just have trouble being around people.
Jake: People?
Ziggy: Well, okay... singular. You should know. Being around your like best friend, your... security blanket. (looks over at Emma, then Milli) And I'm stuck with being completely buggered just staying in the same room...

Milli: (calls across) Can we come over yet? We look like hookers hanging around at the bar.
Jake: Uh, yeah, we'll... get a bigger table.
Milli: We just need three, Ziggy's going...
Ziggy: I'm just going to the men's room.

He withdraws warily.

Jake: How'd that go?
Milli: Really well, didn't it? Great, so much fun. Got Em a kickass outfit, wait till you see it. Sunita too. So you guys got outfits for the gig yet?
Jake: I was... just gonna go like this?
Emma: Hopefully a clean shirt...
Milli: No, you should get something new. Look nice.
Jake: And maybe something borrowed?
Milli: That's getting married.
Jake: Hmm... I've got new songs, old songs, covers... I just need some John Lee Hooker for something blue...

Ziggy returns, still warily.

Milli: Why so pissed off?
Ziggy: Me? Not. Happy! (smiles a bit too broadly) Why would I be pissed off? Calm as a sleeping Buddhist!
Jake: Anyway, I'll get some drinks in...

Milli watches him go and rounds on Ziggy.

Milli: So, it's all gonna be okay?
Ziggy: Umm... well ... Yeah?... I guess... kinda...
Milli: (to Emma) See? Told you.
Ziggy: I mean we haven't talked about it explicitly. As in, naming names...
Milli: It's cool. Totally got Sunita a great outfit too.
Ziggy: Huh?
Milli: Make a move.
Ziggy: What? Where? Whom? Why? Wait... Who? ... On who?
Milli: Come on.
Ziggy: What does it have to do with me?
Milli: Y'know.
Ziggy: Oh... (eyes open in realisation) No. Thank you for whatever it is you're trying, but no.
Milli: Hey, it's not like you got anyone else.
Ziggy: (mumbles) Yet...
Milli: Ooh, is there gossip?
Ziggy: No. (looks around in slight panic)
Milli: I'll get her to make the first move.
Ziggy (to Emma): You know what it's like when you want the earth to open up and swallow you?
Emma: Yeah. Hardly ever does it.

Milli: She's lovely.
Ziggy: But she's not right.
Milli: How?
Ziggy: She's not someone else.
Milli: Ahhhh... (smirks)
Ziggy: ... I meant anybody else. No, really. Seriously.

Milli turns to Emma.

Milli: Double progress attack time. Definite gossip here.
Emma: Hm. (nods slightly)

Milli: Bet Jake knows.
Ziggy: Uh, no. We didn't talk about that. At all. We don't ever talk about things like that. I don’t even know that guy. Jake? Jake who? I was just talking about some of his lyrics. Because they... uhh... they stink.
Milli: (affronted) I don't think there's anything wrong with them.
Ziggy: Right. So you don't mind the "rhyme or die" approach to songwriting...

Milli: Well, I'll ask him. We could talk about you...
Ziggy: What? Me? No! No... I'm boring. What's there to talk about? Really? He doesn't even like me that much. Hey look, is that a new jukebox?
Milli: No, it isn't. And hey, I'm really good at this boy-girl thing.

Ziggy arches an eyebrow and says nothing.

Milli: Well, just add it to the list of things you don't tell me.

With that, she heads over to talk to Jake. Ziggy's head drops to the table.

Milli: So... gossip?
Jake: Er... Henry and Ginny are arguing?
Milli: They are?... That's not what I meant.

Ziggy looks over at Emma. She smiles weakly.

Ziggy: How are you?
Emma: I'm okay...

Milli: So did he tell you who he likes?
Jake: Nope. He won't. Probably never will.
Milli: At all? Tcch.

Jake shrugs.

Jake: Not really our business.
Milli: No, it's just chat. Like, um... (looks over at Emma)
Jake: No, Milli. No...

Sophie storms past, Lawrence following making stammery apologetic noises.

Lawrence: But-but, Sophie, I... I mean, really, So- come on, but... I...

Ziggy tracks them, then looks back to Jake and Milli.

Emma: So, it's... it's not, is it?
Ziggy: (sighs) If I told you I'd have to kill you.
Emma: You're so sweet...
Ziggy: Sweet. Right. Sweet... oh so sweet... Why don't you just kill me now...
Emma: You and Milli would be perfect together.

Jake: We're not going to -
Milli: Yes you are.
Jake: I don't think we are. Really, bad idea.
Milli: You two are a perfect couple. You belong together. Why not?
Jake: I don't want to.

Milli pauses mid-sentence and swallows.

Milli: Oh. But...
Jake: Stop pushing. Just, please, stop.
Milli: I haven't!
Jake: Yes, you kinda have.
Milli: Uh...

Ziggy interrupts her response as he rushes over.

Ziggy: Hey, great idea! How about we play pool? Just the three of us?
Milli: Emma, pool?
Ziggy: WHY? Are you some kind of Siamese twins?
Milli: Oh, come on. Boys against girls. And no magic.
Emma: Nah, I've really gotta study. You guys have fun.

Emma arches an eyebrow and smirks at Ziggy. He ducks out and goes to the bathroom, leaving Jake alone against the unstoppable force of Milli.

Milli: I know you don't mean it. You need more time.
Jake: You're not listening. You don't listen. What is this block you have?
Milli: I... I just... I just want... I just want you two to be happy.

She shakes her head and goes to the bathroom, where she finds Ziggy repeatedly banging his forehead against the men's room door.

Milli: Are you... okay?
Ziggy: Hunky-dory... the world is my oyster.
Milli: Ahhh. I think I know who you like... So, Jake is totally not interested any more.
Ziggy: (looks surprised and hopeful) Okay... okay...
Milli: So the way is clear.
Ziggy: I feel slightly comforted.
Milli: It's all good.
Ziggy: Hm?
Milli: Dude, it's all good. Just go for it!

Ziggy looks over, wary, hopeful.

Ziggy: But what about... y'know... is it reciprocal?
Milli: I dunno.
Ziggy: You don't know?
Milli: I'll get back to you.

He watches her go, mouth open.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

06-09-2004, 03:41 PM

Meanwhile, Escher leans against his desk, arms folded and face set in a frown, flanked by Sunita and Margot in their most conservative outfits, as he speaks with a thin, dark-haired man (Nathaniel Parker) in a sober black suit.

Escher: Mister Chase, if you would read the report compiled by the observers your direct superior assigned -
Chase: Of course we have read their report.
Sunita: good, because -
Chase: Whether we act on it, however, would be our decision. Mister Travers sent me to adjudge the situation as it stands now, not as it has been until recently. There is a severe and present danger to the safety of this institution, and the society as a whole. We have to know when sacrifices must be made for the good of all.
Escher: (shouting) I'll go to the Council!
Chase: (hissing) I come from the Council.
Escher: (coldly) You come from Travers. He does not speak for the entire Council, you know.
Chase: We'll see, Mister Escher. We'll see.
Sunita: So, when can we expect a decision?
Chase: You will be informed in due time.

Escher rubs his forehead.
Sunita: So, what can we do? Is there anyone else on the Council that might go against it.
Escher: We'll see. I knew he wasn't going to admit that I had a point, but I really shouldn't have started shouting. I should know better...

Ziggy heads back to see Jake.

Ziggy: Uh... I think women hate me. I mean, I can see why. But still... it's just not fair!
Jake: Yup. Uh-huh.
Ziggy: She said she'd get back to me...
Jake: Ouch.

Milli sits with Emma.

Milli: So, Em... Ziggy, uh... likes you.
Emma: You're kidding.
Milli: No, really.
Emma: No, I think he likes you.

Mill blinks. Then giggles and waves off the idea.

Milli: No! We had a conversation. He pretty much admitted it.
Emma: Riiiiight...
Milli: He's lovely.
Emma: Yeah... yeah, he is...

As Emma heads over to the bar, Ziggy approaches Milli, nervously.

Ziggy: Milli, about that getting back to me thing...
Milli: Yes. I had a conversation with her.
Ziggy: (puzzled) Really?
Milli: It might take a while. Getting over the Jake thing. It was really serious for her, y'know.
Ziggy: I thought that was done - wait, WHAT? You had a conversation with her and...
Milli: Okay, you're being weird now...
Ziggy: What kind of conversation was this? (looks left) Do you like him? (looks right) He's so dreamy... (looks left) Yeah, but... there's 'her'...
Milli: Well we're not actually...
Ziggy: WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, WOMAN?! Why can't you just say "I like you" or "I don't like you"? It's really not that hard!
Milli: Uh...
Ziggy: And who talks about themselves in the third person, anyway?
Milli: Huh? I wasn't talking about me, I was talking about Emma.
Ziggy: WHY?!
Milli: We were...
Ziggy: ... not talking about Emma?
Milli: (exasperated) Oh, but I've just gone and said it to her now! Why not about Emma?
Ziggy: I dunno? My lack of saying "Emma" at any time might have been a clue? For obvious reasons! I was dealing with you finding out...
Milli: Uh... obviously I haven't. back to the drawing board.

Ziggy stares in disbelief, then holds his face with his hands in case it falls off.

Ziggy: Look. It's not Emma. It's not Sunita. It's not Tess. Or Rachel. It's not Charlotte...
Milli: Michelle?
Ziggy: No! I have to... say something that scares me... a little...
Jake: You guys want a drink?
Ziggy: ... (stares blankly) I want a gun.
Milli: Me too. I just said all this stuff to Emma...

At this point, Sunita returns, looking flustered.

Ziggy: Again. Notice how I do not freak out when she enters the room.
Milli: Right. I see where this is going.

She looks over to Jake, and her eyes widen.

Milli: Oh my God. That explains... so much...
Ziggy: Does it? Am I that confusing? Have you figured it out then?
Milli: I think so. Talking to Jake... was that what that was about?
Ziggy: Yeah, sort of.
Milli: Right! (smiles reassuringly) You shoulda told me.
Ziggy: I've been trying! Just not hard enough, obviously...
Milli: And what does he think?
Ziggy: ... (Ziggy's brain desperately tries to escape out of his ears) WHAT?

Sunita arrives. Jake puts a friendly arm around Ziggy. Milli smiles and nods knowingly.

Jake: Whatcha drinkin'?
Milli: So how was the meeting?
Sunita: Hi. Um, Ziggy...
Ziggy: (almost frothing at the mouth) WHAT IS IT NOW?!
Sunita: I've got some bad news.
Ziggy: I find it hard to believe it'd top my day so far.
Sunita: It would appear that the Council has made a decision regardless of our observations.

She furrows her brow at having to deliver this news. Ziggy gives her a blank look.

Ziggy: Could you vague that up a bit?
Sunita: It's bad.
Ziggy: I like to call it Thursday.
Sunita: I think they intend to place you in protective custody. Unless they decide to put you to work.
Ziggy: Okay, yeah, that's bad. Doesn't quite top it, but it is bad.
Sunita: Or kill you.
Milli: WHAT?!
Emma: Oh God...
Jake: There's no... fourth option?

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

06-09-2004, 03:43 PM

Our heroes look aghast as Sunita explains that the meeting with Chase was a foregone conclusion.

Sunita: Of course we aren't certain. Mister Travers and his cohort aren't known for sharing.
Jake: Well, who has the most sway on the Council?
Sunita: Mister Travers is the head of security. There is no recourse, short of the entire Council disagreeing.

Ziggy shivers and lies on the pool table.

Sunita: Mister Escher's not very happy.
Ziggy: I'm just gonna lie here for a while and stare at the ceiling...
Milli: We have to do something.
Sunita: Perhaps we can arrange to have him taken into the protection of another faction of the society. Someone who doesn't think he's a danger.
Jake: So he's a danger because of his family.
Sunita: Not entirely. He has his own abilities. Margot and I presented our case, but Mister Chase wasn't listening.
Sunita: Travers will be able to do as he decides unless Mister Escher can find someone to speak on Ziggy's behalf.
Jake: Is that likely?
Sunita: The indications are not helpful.

She leans over Ziggy, concerned.

Sunita: I don't think he means to kill you.
Jake: I suppose there's always running away.

Ziggy gets off the table and stands.

Ziggy: Who does he think he is? He can't order me around. I don't care what his plans are for me. I didn't care about my father's plans, why should I care about his? Let him come. I don't care how many of his people I have to put in wheelchairs for a week...
Sunita: (softly) Then he'll destroy you.
Ziggy: What kind of madness is this?
Emma: (shivering) It's a witch hunt.
Sunita: It could be that he's looking for an excuse. And if you fight, you'll give it to him. I don't think he is, but I don't think he has any qualms about killing you either. Who's going to argue?
Ziggy: I will. How many people have I harmed?
Sunita: If you fight the people he sends, you would give him the evidence he needs.
Emma: And if you don't, they'll take you away.
Ziggy: How do you prove a negative? Dammit!! I'm just trying to figure out who's worse, Travers or my father.
Sunita: Well, Mister Travers never bought me dinner...

Everyone starts pacing around nervously.

Jake: We deal with them one at a time. How long do we get before a decision?
Sunita: Probably already made.
Milli: We need to do something.
Sunita: Mister Escher's already making calls. In the meantime...
Emma: Um... patrolling?
Sunita: Yes. A chance to prove his worth.
Ziggy: Yeah. Let's kill something.

This agreed, the group saddle up.

Ziggy: Have I even met the bastard?
Sunita: Yes... um, when you did meet him, you were acting like kind of a spoiled brat.

They round a corner and hear a vampire snarl as he barrels into another figure, slamming him against a wall. The victim... is a vampire too...

Fight Vamp 1: That was my kill!
Fight Vamp 2: I didn't see your name on it! 'Less your name's Gap Athletic!

They share a look.

Ziggy: I have to admit that was a funny line.
Jake: Two to one on the big one.

Milli puts a bolt through both of the vamps with an exasperated sigh. Carrying on, they find a confused student in jogging gear climbing out of a bush.

Jogger: Uh... did you see these two weird-looking guys? They came over together and then they started yelling. The first one shoved me into a bush and they started going at it...

Milli: Okay, that was mildly weird.
Sunita: Vampires aren't the most co-operative of creatures.
Emma: So, keep going?
Jake: I guess...
Milli: Yeah, loads more ground to cover. We should go.
Jake: You gotta stop dusting them so quickly.
Milli: Well gosh, I thought that was the idea. It's kind of my job.
Emma: Shh. You hear that?

As they reach the grassy banks of the Cam, they see two dogs fighting.

Milli: Are these, like, evil dogs?
Emma: Uh... no.

The dogs look over as the humans approach, and the larger one runs off. The smaller tilts its head and sticks its tongue out. Milli picks it up and looks at it.

Milli: Yeah, that's a dog...
Jake: Is it just me or is a theme emerging?
Ziggy: A theme of picking up dogs?
Emma: So, uh, drinks?
Jake: Just a few.
Milli: Yeah. Let's get really drunk. That's a good plan.
Sunita: I don't think so.
Ziggy: It's not really your choice.

Meanwhile, William meets Charlotte at the library to find her looking at her watch and tapping her foot impatiently.

Charlotte: You should have been here twenty minutes ago.
William: Sorry, I had to finish a report.
Charlotte: You could have called!
William: I'm sorry.
Charlotte: I should bloody hope so!

Heading back to the pub, the group pass Ros hissing into her phone.

Rosalind: Genevieve, it's just two weeks until the damned thing. Could you get it done? Thank you!

Tessa and Rachel continue to glare at each other. At the pool table, Francis accuses Tim of cheating.
Then as the Watch enter someone trips over someone's leg, there's a wee bit of shouting, and BOOM! The room dissolves into a massive bar brawl. Rugger buggers charging each other, Rachel clinging to Tessa's back and punching her shoulder, drinks being thrown into faces and someone attempting to pick up a surprisingly heavy stool.

Ziggy: Could you people just stop doing all this?
Milli: Oh, it's a spell...

Her reaction is a surprising mix of joy and relief.

Milli: It's all a spell... Oh, thank God. I was worried...

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

06-09-2004, 03:46 PM

Jake and Sunita go to separate Tessa and Rachel. Emma tries to pull Ginny off Henry. Milli jumps onto a booth table and runs across the benches to get to Tim and Francis before they use their pool cues on each other...

Milli: Ziggy! A sleep spell might be good now!

Jake and Sunita get in each other's ways.

Jake: Out the way!
Sunita: Move your arse!

Ziggy nods, mutters, and everyone except he and Milli pass out. Milli retrieves the pool cues from Tim and Francis.

Milli: Nice one. That solved that.
Ziggy: They'll be very, very relieved when they wake up a few hours from now.

Then he looks over at her and pauses.

Ziggy: Look, as this day couldn't possibly get any worse... and I dunno how long I'm gonna be here. How long before I'm in a prison cell wearing a towel... So, I'm just gonna tell it straight.

He pauses for breath...

Ziggy: Milli... I love you.

Milli blinks.

Ziggy: Sorry. It just happened. I just had to say it. At least I did something right today. I told you...

Milli realises her mouth is hanging open and shuts it.

Ziggy: I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't kick me too hard.

Mill drops the pool cues.

Ziggy: Yeah, I'm sorry about that. (looks around) Hey, free drinks! Uh, you'd have to get 'em yourself. I'm not moving. If I get up I'll go down like a sack of rocks.

She blinks again.

Ziggy: Well, silence is good. Not trying to kick me. Thank you.
Milli: Um...

They stare ahead.

Ziggy: Okay, silence not so good any more. Are you gonna say something?
Milli: ...Yeah... um...
Ziggy: I'll make it easy. Repeat after me: "I'm very flattered but no."
Milli: ...
Ziggy: "I'm very flattered"... okay, you're not.
Milli: Uh, no. Definitely with the flattered...
Ziggy: No, it's alright.

Milli sits down and takes a breath.

Milli: I, no, I mean... I don't...
Ziggy: Care?
Milli: NO... I just thought... just be...
Ziggy: No, as I said, I'm sorry.
Milli: Never thought about it before... but... we've always just been friends.
Ziggy: Friends is fine. (swallows hard) Friends is great... I think I'm gonna let them wake up again. Unless you don't want the gang to wake up yet?
Milli: M-maybe not for a bit... I'm really sorry. Really. Um. I never... I never thought about it.
Ziggy: Don't think. You either feel or you don't. That's okay.

Milli looks away, lost in thought. Eventually, she takes a deep breath, and turns to face Ziggy.

Milli: Well, I mean, what did you want to do?

Ziggy blinks now.

Ziggy: I admit I expected questions... but not that one... more like "how?" and "why?" and "oh God, are you kidding?"
Milli: ARE you?
Ziggy: No. I'm really, really not.
Milli: Oh... then why?

Ziggy shrugs.

Ziggy: It's like... you wake up one morning and there it is. You just know it'd suck not spending the day, the week... the year with you. There's really no thinking involved.
Milli: Why... why didn't you SAY anything?
Ziggy: There was the whole Jake thing with you, and we're friends, and -
Milli: (quickly) What's Jake being your friend got to do with it?
Ziggy: Nothing. Look, um, and this wasn't getting too hard already... If it was up to me I wouldn't say anything. I would have just let it slide. But there's something in my weird head doing it. The inner me from Mars. And... with all this going on, I figure I don't have many chances. I can't afford to miss this one.
Milli: Uh...
Ziggy: Anyway, um, I think we have some pressing issues not about us. (looks around at the unconscious bar) We have a job to do.
Milli: ... Right.

With that, they go back to work shifting the sleepers out of fighting positions, saying nothing until they're done. They lift Rachel off Tessa, and wipe the former's drool off the latter's cheek. Then Ziggy raises his hands, and the sleepers start to wake up.

Jake looks around, notices that only Ziggy and Milli are up, and says nothing.

Emma: Why am I on the floor? I wasn't fighting.
Milli: I don't really know...
Jake: Let's go.

Milli: So that was a spell, right?
Ziggy: Right.
Jake: So where's it coming from?
Ziggy: This way...

The trail leads to Skel's old hideout on Carnarvon Road.

Ziggy: Well, this day couldn't suck any more. (concentrates) There's no magician in there now.

Opening the door, our heroes find it isn't rigged with traps or even locked.

Heading into the basement, Jake opens the door - and stumbles back as if burned, blinking, as he sees Benjamin Roots killing Skel bare-handed.

Emma: Jake?
Milli: Are you okay?

He looks to Ziggy.

Jake: I just had a lovely vision of your father.
Ziggy: He has that effect on people.
Jake: He killed Skel. Right here.

He rather pointedly steps away from the wall.

Emma: So Adelia was telling the truth?
Milli: Yeah... oddly enough for a Roots family member, she usually does.

Ziggy frowns and looks away.

Ziggy: Well, I'd say I'm sorry to hear about the loss of such a valuable member of society, but I'm not that good a liar. Also... good riddance, you son of a bitch.

Heading into the darkness, they find a small altar on the floor. Symbols in chalk surround a circle of salt, five candles burn in a circle, and in the centre are five broken links from a piece of chain. Ziggy stamps out one of the candles and scuffs out the symbols.

Milli: So what was it?

Emma picks up one of the broken links.

Emma: Some kind of spell of discord. Friend against friend, stuff like that.
Jake: Can you guys tell when it was cast?
Milli: Or who cast it?
Ziggy: I can take a guess.

Jake looks over the ruined altar.

Jake: Just five? Not one for each of us?
Emma: It hasn't really affected us. Well, not directly. I mean, if any group of people was gonna start fighting each other...

She smiles wanly. Nobody meets anybody's gaze.

Jake: We've been warded... but out-of-towners haven't.
Sunita: Mister Chase?
Ziggy: My good friend the silver lining on the horizon has returned. Well... maybe.
Jake: But then again, Escher started yelling at him.
Ziggy: I've been told that Escher does have emotions.
Milli: He just doesn't like you much.
Jake: You're not the only one.
Emma: I guess we should see if everyone's okay.

Milli crouches beside the altar, looks over the broken chain, and blows out the candles.

Jake: You okay?
Milli: ... Yeah...

They reach the bar, where things seem quiet...

Ziggy: Well, our work here is done.
Milli: Guess we should...
Ziggy: Yeah.
Milli: I'll be in, in a bit.

She pauses and stands outside, arms folded, looking out into the night. Then she looks inside to where the group are sitting, and, sighing heavily, looks at the ground. Unfolding her arms, she heads home.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

06-09-2004, 03:49 PM

Next evening is the first public performance by Jake's new band.

Milli arrives looking happy. Almost smug.

Sunita stands at the bar, feeling self-conscious.

Emma turns up wearing the outfit Milli suggested, feeling a bit self-conscious.

William and Charlotte sit together.

Charlotte: Sorry I was huffy earlier. Must be exam stress...
William: I understand...

Tessa and Rachel stand together, not really talking but looking like they're considering it.

Emma: Well, almost everything's back to normal... but Sophie and Lawrence broke up.
Milli: Yeah?

Jake greets the group.

Milli: So, nervous?
Jake: Um, yes...
Milli: It'll be fine.
Ziggy: If you play really bad I'll ask for Free Bird.
Emma: Why is that funny?
Ziggy: Didn't say it was, but it's long and I like it.

And so the band opens with Free Bird.

Jake:
If I leave here tomorrow would you still remember me? For I must be travelling on now...

Ziggy looks across at Milli as he whispers along with the opening lines...

Milli: He is really good though, you have to admit...
Ziggy: Sure.
Emma: Yeah...

Then Jake starts to play the song he wrote for Milli. She starts, and her head jerks instantly to where Jake is standing onstage.

Emma: I don't know this one...
Milli: (surprised) You don't?
Emma: No...

He stumbles on the intro, takes a deep breath, and starts again, looks out, and starts to sing. The lyrics are different from before...

Jake:
Never said I was innocent
I will burn in hell for the things I've done to you
Never said I was anything good
I should die from the shame from what I put you through...

Emma blinks and looks up... and sees Jake isn't looking at her.

Jake:
Let me be the one to bring us back from the dead
I will take the blame for everything
You know I just wanna help you forget...

He's looking at Milli.

Jake:
We are still living on broken glass
We are still numb because it just keeps happening
All your friends, they can kiss my ass
They only see the simple things that they want to see

Let me be the one to make the pain go away
Shed my skin, show a brand new face
You know I just wanna know that you're okay...

Emma turns and backs away, close to tears.

Ziggy heads over towards where Milli is staring wide-eyed at Jake playing onstage, and Emma stumbles into him. Sunita watches her go, open-mouthed.

Ziggy: So, Milli? Emma's gone all whoosh.
Milli: What? (looks around, startled) Oh, bugger. Where?
Ziggy: She left looking all close to breakdown.
Milli: Why?
Ziggy: That guy staring at you and singing that.
Milli: Do you really think he...Um...
Ziggy: So about that thing at the bar...

Milli looks back, finding Emma pulling herself out of the crowd.

Jake carries on playing, seemingly oblivious.

Jake:
Sometimes I think the power is better than a hard drug
Sometimes I think the power is better than anything
Sometimes I think letting go is just like giving up
Sometimes all I think I wanna do is die inside
All I wanna do is die inside
All I ever think about is you and me falling apart...

Ziggy: Talk to her then?
Milli: I better go. Be right back.

She finds Emma sitting curled up against the wall right beside the door.

Milli: Oh God, are you okay?
Emma: N-no...
Milli: Do you wanna...?
Emma: I think I just wanna go home.
Milli: Want me to come?
Emma: No. I mean, it's not like he just dumped me.

Mill helps her up as Ginny comes out looking for her.

Milli: Will she be okay with you?
Ginny: I guess.

Our heroine watches them go and heads back inside as Jake finishes the song...

Jake:
Sometimes I think letting go is just like giving up
Sometimes all I think about is falling apart...

... and walks off stage.

Ziggy: Is she alright?
Milli: Um, no.
Ziggy: Are you alright?
Milli: Jesus! God no. (looks towards the stage) Think he's okay?
Ziggy: Hunky-dory. Has his gig.
Milli: I guess this is an intermission. Put something on the jukebox?
Ziggy: Something soothing. Had enough excitement for two lifetimes.
Milli: I'm not choosing.

Ziggy heads over and selects Travis's Writing To Reach You. Jake goes over to Milli at the bar while he's away.

Milli: Hey...
Jake: This seat taken?
Milli: Go ahead. Emma's gone home. (a little angrily) She's really upset.
Jake: ... Yeah.
Milli: So, you... you were... uh... you…changed the lyrics.
Jake: Yeah, the first lot were good but this has more to it...

He looks into her eyes.

Jake: Things change.

Milli meets his gaze and nods slightly, then looks over as Ziggy returns.

Ziggy: So, nice band you got there. Bit of a short version of Free Bird...
Jake: It can kinda drag.
Ziggy: Only if you play it wrong.

Jake gives him a look. Ziggy grins.

Jake: Anyway, we have so many other things to fit in.
Ziggy: Yeah... So, what's life like as a rock star?
Jake: Oh, you know. Sex and drugs and rock an' roll... Not really.
Ziggy: So there'll be a part two at some point.
Jake: Hey, the band need drinks. What do you think?

Ziggy looks him in the eye.

Ziggy: I think you should apologise to Emma.

Jake looks away.

Jake: Yeah... I guess... Gotta go.

Milli folds her arms and looks down, then watches him go with her head still bowed.

Ziggy: You don't look like you're ready to do the Happy Dance.

She unfolds her arms and waves them very slightly.

Milli: Woo. Happy.
Ziggy: I've seen you happier.
Milli: Why would I be unhappy? Except, y'know, Em.

She looks over at Ziggy.

Milli: I kinda spent a long time being unhappy when she was happy... because of why she was happy... but... so... um...

Then she looks at his expression and giggles.

Milli: You like me.
Ziggy: I might've said something to that effect.
Milli: Not what you said. Said you looooved me... (grins, then sobers) Not really funny, is it?
Ziggy: That depends. What do you think?
Milli: I think you're an idiot.
Ziggy: Women have been known to refer to me as such. Question is, how much of an idiot...
Milli: You said you love ME. Biggest in the world!
Ziggy: ... Wow… I was wrong. That day could get worse...
Milli: Oh... Not that you're an idiot for saying it. It's me. I'm rubbish!
Ziggy: No you're not. Credit me some taste.
Milli: Come on...
Ziggy: I don't make an ass of myself for just anyone.
Milli: Everyone was asleep.
Ziggy: Yeah, well, I'm not really concerned about what they say...
Milli: Yeah, I guess...

On stage, Jake starts to sing again, trying not to glare across at the bar.

Jake:
I read it in the paper
I see it on my TV
Has the whole world lost its head?
Is it just me?

Milli's still trying not to giggle at Ziggy's earnest gaze, occasionally stealing glances at Jake, living it up onstage.

Ziggy: I take it that's your final word on the matter.
Milli: Uh, well, what else am I supposed to say?
Ziggy: Something not pointing and laughing. What I did was...
Milli: Funny.
Ziggy: Ridiculous.

She sobers, frowning.

Milli: Sorry. I didn't mean to make you squirmy. It's just weird. I mean, you're... Ziggy.
Ziggy: It's never not weird. Never feels comfortable. But it was this or spend the rest of the year... the rest of my life thinking "why not?" There's nothing harder than regretting something you didn't do.

Milli nods slightly.

Ziggy: Okay, so...
Milli: You've done this before.
Ziggy: Sort of...
Milli: So what happens now?
Ziggy: That depends. If you feel "okay, fine", say "okay, fine". If you feel like "Hell no, I want to poke my eyes out with red hot pokers" then say "can't we be friends?" or "you're like a brother to me"...
Milli: We are friends. And you are like a brother to me.

Ziggy grimaces.

Ziggy: Thank you.
Milli: In a good way. Brothers, good! (thumbs up) ... Well, not your brother. But like a brother.
Ziggy: A creepy brother who wants to date you...
Milli: Like a brother.

He smiles gently.

Ziggy: I'm not gonna try and push you to do something you don't want.
Milli: Yeah. Um... it just kinda came outta nowhere... you musta known.
Ziggy: I just thought it was me being me. I mean, every girl with a shirt that stops above... the knee...
Milli: Oh God, is that it?

She folds her arms over her chest, eyes slowly returning to Jake..

Ziggy: No. If that was it, I'd just shrug, maybe put my head in a bucket of cold water and carry on.
Milli: How do you know it's not?
Ziggy: These things should pass. It shouldn't bother me how you feel about me... but it does. So I'm thinking it's not just hormones. Maybe it's just real...ly painful emotions.

Milli looks at her boots.

Milli: Sorry.
Ziggy: Not like you meant to be great.
Milli: I'm not that great. I just kick things and mope. Apparently...

She arches an eyebrow at Ziggy. He smiles apologetically and nods.

Milli: I'm not used to you telling me stuff... in general. It's really weird. Like I'd have to kick it out of you.
Ziggy: I'm trying my best. Look, just because I can't handle these emotions doesn't mean they're not honest. If you want me to say something, I'll say it. The ball's in your court now.
Milli: Well... I don't really know what we're supposed to do now... I mean, go to the cinema, go to dinner and stuff?
Ziggy: Well... you should... (slowly realising)... umm... do what you want to do.
Milli: I think there's walks on piers too. Maybe that's more of an English thing.
Ziggy: (starts to smile) No, piers are great. Yay for piers!

They share a smile.

Ziggy: You do know this'll be an uphill battle. My family's out to kill me... the Watchers are out to get me as well...
Milli: Not really a new thing.
Ziggy: We can take 'em.
Milli: Yeah. I kick things, you can make your eyes go funny. It'll be fine.

On stage, Jake looks across and starts to play One Way Or Another... Ziggy looks over and smirks.

Ziggy: You dancin'?
Milli: You askin'?
Ziggy: I'm askin'.
Milli: ... Alright, guess I'm dancin', then.

Jake hits a bum note as Ziggy and Milli head into the crowd dancing, then shakes it off and starts playing a little faster as they dance, close but not too close, smiling. The camera pans back to show the crowd, people dancing, happy. And just for a moment, everything's okay.

CREDITS!
Free Bird, The Swing, Has The Whole World Lost Its Head? and One Way Or Another performed by Everclear
You Dancin'?

Craig Oxbrow

06-09-2004, 03:52 PM

Escher V/O: Next time on The Watch House:

Roger Wyndam-Pryce looks through a spread of files. He picks one up, with a student ID picture of Milli on the cover.

Wyndam-Pryce: Before we go, take a moment to peruse the files on our subjects.

A shot of Milli unsheathing her sword and charging.

Wyndam-Pryce V/O: Miss Blackhurst is very protective of her friends. There are tensions within the group, but she seeks to keep everyone together as far as possible. However, in all she is a child of the Council. I do not foresee any significant problems there.

A shot of Jake looking ready to hit someone.

Wyndam-Pryce V/O: Apparently a friend. A civilian. I expect him to be the most troublesome of all. However, by all reports he is easily swayed.

Escher clenching his fists.

Wyndam-Pryce V/O: Despite Mister Escher's recent outbursts I am certain that we can convince him of our motives. His ties to the Council are really the only things that keep him going.

William in tears, sitting on the floor, holding Charlotte close.

Wyndam-Pryce V/O: We have no reason to expect any difficulties with Mister Grove.

Wyndam-Pryce picking up Ziggy's file.

Wyndam-Pryce: And, of course, the target.

Milli: Evil does not bring donuts!

Escher V/O: The next episode of The Watch House is We Gotta Get Out.

--

DVD Commentary

(Milli fails to grasp that Ziggy likes her)
Derek: Aw, bless her little cotton socks. Now if only she'd take them out of her ears.
Cat: She's got it down, hasn't she?

Craig: At this point, the subplot ran past the plot in a straight dash.
Cat: There was plot? Oh, yes, there was. With Tessa and that. And I pursued it. I felt duly plotted!

Craig: So we got Everclear to play the band...
Derek: Everclear? Everway is something else?
Joe: Yeah, it's...
Derek: A roleplaying game.
Cat: And Geek of the Week goes to...

thenewgirl

06-09-2004, 09:01 PM

Cool.

:)

Craig Oxbrow

06-09-2004, 09:04 PM

We aim to please.

colbabe

06-09-2004, 11:36 PM

Originally posted by Craig Oxbrow
Ziggy: Look. It's not Emma. It's not Sunita. It's not Tess. Or Rachel. It's not Charlotte...
Milli: Michelle?
Ziggy: No! I have to... say something that scares me... a little...
Jake: You guys want a drink?
Ziggy: ... (stares blankly) I want a gun.
Milli: Me too. I just said all this stuff to Emma...
LOL! I have so been there, all too many times in my life.
Jake puts a friendly arm around Ziggy. Milli smiles and nods knowingly.
And John has only just been there.

morgue

06-10-2004, 01:18 AM

more more more!

~`more-gue

Craig Oxbrow

06-10-2004, 01:54 PM

On its way. Some time...

Craig Oxbrow

07-12-2004, 02:24 PM

The Watch House 2.15: We Gotta Get Out Of This Place

Note the slightly different cast list...

Milli: punkette angst-fuelled Watcher trainee, starting a relationship with Ziggy
Jake: psychic civilian currently feeling rejected
Andy: quiet unassuming hereditary lycanthrope, in control, oh yeah, you betcha
Sunita: Watchers' Council very proper teaching assistant
Escher: dour but fatherly Watchers' tutor

(NPC)
Ziggy: badass sorcerer and son of supervillain
Emma: Jake's broken-hearted spellcasting ex
William: Mister Watcher Trainee
Jack: rugby-playing civilian, fallen back in with the Watch

Margot: Watchers' Council fairly slapdash teaching assistant
Wyndam-Pryce: Watchers' Council representative
Chase: Watchers' Council security
Fiona: Watchers' allied coven leader
Charlotte: William's civilian girlfriend
Freddy, aka Shmuck: spellcasting student idiot

Previously on The Watch House:

Jake's band playing.
Milli's kiss bringing Jake back to his senses.
Sunita breaking the news of Chase's expected judgement.
Ziggy sending everyone in the Brody to sleep except Milli.

Ziggy: I'm just gonna tell it straight. Milli... I love you.

Jake's band playing.

Milli: So... um... (giggles) You like me.

Jake singing, gazing out at Milli.
Emma leaving in tears.

Craig Oxbrow

07-12-2004, 02:25 PM

We open in a darkened meeting room, with a number of men in conservative suits seated around an oak conference table. Roger Wyndam-Pryce stands at the head of the table, looking down at a spread of files.

Wyndam-Pryce: Before we go, take a moment to peruse the files on our subjects.

He picks up the first, and we see a student card ID photo of Milli on the front.

Wyndam-Pryce: Miss Blackhurst is very protective of her friends. There are tensions within the group, but she seeks to keep everyone together as far as possible. However, in all she is a child of the Council. I do not foresee any significant problems there.

The next file has a photo of Jake on stage.

Wyndam-Pryce: "Jake" Deville. Apparently a friend. A civilian, involved due to his inherited psychic abilities. I expect him to be the most troublesome of all. However, by all reports he is easily swayed.

He taps a thin file with a photo of Emma walking on the green, taken from the side.

Wyndam-Pryce: The witch might go along with him, but she is hardly of a power level to pose a threat.

A graduation photo of Sunita is clipped to the next folder.

Wyndam-Pryce: Miss Chadha has been compromised by her contact with the group, and may have become a liability. However, there is no doubt that her loyalties lie with the Council. Speaking of which...

Another file with a photograph of Margot grinning for the camera.

Wyndam-Pryce: Lady Margaret should present no trouble at all.

He hands a folder with a photo of Escher on the front to the man on his right, who proves to be Mr. Chase.

Wyndam-Pryce: Despite Mister Escher's recent outbursts I am certain that we can convince him of our motives. His ties to the Council are really the only things that keep him going.

Andy's file has what would appear to be a surveillance photo attached.

Wyndam-Pryce: The Lycanthropus Manticora is only loosely connected to the group. He should not pose any threat, unless a physical confrontation should arise. Which it should not.

Another student ID, this time William's.

Wyndam-Pryce: We have no reason to expect any difficulties with Mister Grove.

He flicks over a file with a picture of Jack.

Wyndam-Pryce: The last civilian has proven very easily swayed. He gave us much of the updated information in these files over a pint.

Finally, he picks up Ziggy's file.

Wyndam-Pryce: And, of course, the target.

CREDITS!
Written and directed by Joe Dizzy

Craig Oxbrow

07-12-2004, 02:26 PM

Next morning, the morning after the gig, the actual Watchers in training arrive at the office to find Margot making tea and Andy sacked out in one of the chairs. Escher looks up from researching methods of draining magical power across distances, and blocking the same, as the office telephone rings.

Wyndam-Pryce: This is Roger Wyndam-Pryce. I have been instructed to inspect your group.
Escher: Again. I see...
Wyndam-Pryce: I would like to see all of you in your office in forty-five minutes.
Escher: Of course...
Wyndam-Pryce: I need not remind you that your Invigilator status is still probationary, pending final adjudication by the Council. I will see you in three quarters of an hour. Good day.

Escher hangs up and sighs.

Escher: Mister Wyndam-Pryce is coming to give us an inspection.
Milli: Didn't we have one of those last week?
Andy: What'll it prove?
Milli: All it's going to prove is that they can inspect us whenever they like. Which we kinda knew already.
Andy: What are they gonna do? Replace us with someone better?
Escher: Yes, well, this isn't our full complement.
Milli: Oh, I should call Emma... (furrows brow)
Margot: And I'll get some biscuits. (smiles cheerily)

Milli gives Emma a call. Emma sounds aloof.

Milli: Hi!
Emma: (softly) Hello...
Milli: Um, how's it going? How are things?
Emma: Fine...
Milli: Oh. Good. Um, we're having another random spot inspection.
Emma: ... Oh?
Milli: You should come down.
Emma: Alright... I just need to freshen up...
Milli: Oh, yeah. Did you get much sleep?
Emma: Not really.
Milli: Right, um... are you pissed off with me?
Emma: No. Should I be?
Milli: No, you just... sound weird.
Emma: I just... couldn't sleep.
Milli: Well, y'know, get your arse down here and we'll sort you out.

As he's been told to gather everyone, Escher calls Jack.

Jack: First off, I didn't do it. But, er, hi.
Escher: Could you come to my office for an inspection?
Jack: Oh, sure, I don't have anything else to do. (calls off) Hey Michelle, where are my pants?

As Escher hangs up with an expression of clear distaste, Milli calls Ziggy... hangs up... and calls back.

Milli: Hey. Emmm... we've got an inspection come down inspect us all big group.
Ziggy: Er... right. I was on my way anyway.
Milli: Cool.
Ziggy: Okay, bye.
Milli: Bye.
Ziggy: See you then.
Milli: Bye.
Ziggy: Bye.
Milli: Right. Bye.
Ziggy: Yeah...

And he hangs up.

He arrives two minutes later, with a big smile and a box of donuts. As bouncy as a barrel full of moneys.

Ziggy: Who here likes jelly-filled donuts?
Andy: Yo!
Ziggy: Jelly for ma man!
Margot: You've had two scones already.
Ziggy: Chocolate? Escher?
Escher: No... thank you.
Ziggy: Choc-o-late dooonuts... (shaking the box in front of him suggestively)
Sunita: Ooh, can I?
Milli: Yeah...

Mill looks suspiciously at Zig as he sits backwards on the nearest chair.

Milli: Where'd you get the donuts?
Ziggy: Place on the corner. So! (claps hands) What's the plan? Anything exciting? Killing vampires? That'd be cool.
Escher: Er...
Sunita: Cup of tea to go with those?
Ziggy: I'll get it. You relax.

Escher: (watching him go) He seems... happier.

Jack strolls in.

Sunita: Oh... Jack. I'll have to get your file.
Jack: So, anything interesting happen while I was away?
Escher: Nothing you need worry about...
Milli: I'm gonna go help Ziggy.

Jack shrugs.

Jack: Well, that's a new way for them to be like an old married couple...

Then Emma arrives. She looks... okay. She waves and smiles placidly to everyone.

Emma: So, inspection huh?
Sunita: Yes. Er, how was your weekend? After the whole sleep spell thing.
Emma: ... Fine.
Sunita: Are you alright?
Emma: Yeah. I probably had too much to drink last night.
Sunita: Yes... (looks at her hands) That can have a terrible effect.
Emma: Yeah. I have exams. The stress was just accumulating.
Sunita: Well, if you'd like to discuss study techniques -
Emma: Maybe. For now I'm taking the day off.
Sunita: Right. Good idea. It's just unfortunate about this inspection.
Emma: Yeah...

Ziggy tries to make coffee. Milli watches, tilting her head for a better view.

Milli: You press the button.
Ziggy: And where does the coffee go in?
Milli: It goes in the cups. It's not like tea... you're kind of... new at this.
Ziggy: What, I can't be nice to people I like?
Milli: You never are.
Ziggy: Well, I don't want to show how I like people!... Er, forget I said that... So, um... how are we...?
Milli: Gonna do this?
Ziggy: Well, yes. Also, break the news.
Milli: oh.
Ziggy: We could do this casually, or... not so casually?
Milli: Well... what are we telling people?
Ziggy: I dunno. What are we telling people?
Milli: I asked you first.
Ziggy: Well, I guess... we...
Milli: We...
Ziggy: Are...
Milli: Are...
Ziggy: (long pause) Seeing each other, are we? Or not? We are, right?

A call from outside:

Sunita: Are you alright in there?
Milli: Yes! Coffee! Yep!... Where is it?
Sunita: On the left.
Milli: Oh, the left... (grins)

She looks back to Ziggy and speaks quietly.

Milli: Are we?
Ziggy: I guess we are. Are we?
Milli: If you say we are?
Ziggy: Are we...?
Milli: Sailing?
Ziggy: The 'couple' word.
Milli: Well... (leans against the worktop) If we're seeing each other does that automatically mean we're a couple?
Ziggy: Not automatically.
Milli: Well, do you want to just do the seeing, or...
Ziggy: No, couple is fine. Fine?
Milli: Yeah. (nods) So that means that I'm your... (thoughtfully) girlfriend.
Ziggy: Unless you don't want to...
Milli: (quickly) No. That's fine.
Ziggy: Right.
Milli: Okay.
Ziggy: Yeah.

They look over as the kettle boils.

Milli: Oh yeah, coffee! Do you want a hand with those... (leans in) so, are there like rules? Stuff I have to do if I'm your girlfriend?
Ziggy: Not really.
Milli: (a little too quickly) I have had boyfriends before! Loads! But it's different now. Because... you're... (thinks of something) from Jamaica! So, is there?
Ziggy: Good rule of thumb is… do what you feel.
Milli: Right, Usually good at that.
Ziggy: Well, now you mention, I might have thought about kissing. It might be appropriate… err.. nice… err…. Good... At some point, any time you want… don't want to rush it.
Milli: Oh, hey, it's only kissing!

And she grins unconvincingly. And outside, Mr. Wyndam-Pryce arrives, flanked by two large men in suits, definitely not smiling...

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

07-12-2004, 02:29 PM

Wyndam-Pryce looks around his face and voice filled with contempt.

Wyndam-Pryce: I do not see a full complement of students.
Escher: Millicent and Ziggy are making coffee, Jake has yet to arrive. You are early.
Wyndam-Pryce: I wouldn't want you to think I was giving you too much time to prepare.
Escher: There's no danger of that...
Andy: Y'know, Mister Wyndam-Pryce, I'm sensing a lot of aggression here...
Wyndam-Pryce: (arches an eyebrow) And who are you, boy?
Andy: I'm Andy. We, uh, met before.
Wyndam-Pryce: Sit down, boy. You will not speak unless you’re spoken to. (looks over at Escher) Lack of discipline. (he writes it into his notepad)
Escher: He is a civilian. He hasn't received our years of tutelage...

Milli can be heard giggling in the kitchen. Escher coughs rather pointedly.

Milli: Yeah, I've kissed loads of boys...
Ziggy: Of course. So… should we… like… Now?
Milli: (nervously) Now?!

Ziggy nods slightly.

Milli: But... we've got... coffee! But we could... um...
Ziggy: Oh, right. Coffee away.

And he puts his cup down, and takes hers.

Milli: Um, yeah. So, right... (looks at her hands)
Ziggy: Maybe we shouldn't wait that long, and just -

And he kisses her. She closes her eyes a little too late and has no idea what to do with her hands. He breaks off the kiss and steps back.

Ziggy: So, that was it.
Milli: Right. (laughs unconvincingly) No big deal.
Ziggy: Right.

He grabs the tray of coffee cups rather hurriedly and they head out into the office.

They stop in their tracks as they find Mr. Wyndam-Pryce staring at them.

Milli: ... Coffee? (smiles brightly)
Sunita: Donut? Jelly or chocolate? Or a scone?
Wyndam-Pryce: I am not here to fraternise.
Milli: (back on the defensive) Well then, why are you here?
Wyndam-Pryce: That is none of your concern, Miss Blackhurst.
Milli: I thought I was here to be curious and inquisitive about the world and its mysteries. But obviously I'm actually here to sit and take it all in.

Milli sits, folding her arms. Escher grimaces behind Wyndam-Pryce's back.

Wyndam-Pryce: Quite.
Andy: Any chance you're gonna chill out a bit?

Wyndam-Pryce responds with a glare.

Wyndam-Pryce: Now, I am going to interview each of you. This should not take long, unless someone acts up. (he looks first at Milli, then at Ziggy) Miss Blackhurst?
Milli: Why do I have to go first?
Wyndam-Pryce: Just. Follow. Me.

She rises, follows, and sticks her tongue out at Ziggy as she goes.

Emma looks up idly from a copy of Heat and mutters:

Emma: Somebody's not getting any.

Escher glares at Wyndam-Pryce's guards. Su looks uncomfortable.

Sunita: Cup of coffee? Tea? Scone?

They respond by ignoring her completely and staring ahead.

Wyndam-Pryce leads Milli into an empty tutorial room with an overhead projector running.

Wyndam-Pryce: Please sit down.

She sets down her bag, weapons clinking, as she sits.

Wyndam-Pryce: I will now show you a selection of pictures, and I want you to tell me your first reaction to each of them.
Milli: Are you serious?

Wyndam-Pryce looks serious.

Milli: (quietly) Sorry.

A shot of Cambridge.

Milli: Well, I was expecting one of those ink butterfly things.
Wyndam-Pryce: Your first thought.
Milli: Cambridge.

A surveillance photo of a vampire.

Milli: Vamp... (quickly adds) ire.

The office.

Milli: The office...
Wyndam-Pryce: This is not a test of your observational skills, Miss Blackhurst. I want your opinions.
Milli: Oh. Okay... Escher.
Wyndam-Pryce: And what do you think of him?
Milli: Da - (pause) Really good. Friend. Um, tutor.

A portrait shot of Milli's parents and paternal grandparents.

Milli: Family. Don't really know what to say...
Wyndam-Pryce: Do you have any sort of emotional connection with them?
Milli: Of course I do.
Wyndam-Pryce: Which is?
Milli: (flatly) I love them...
Wyndam-Pryce: I see.

Jack.
Milli: Idiot.

Andy.
Milli: Werewolf.

Emma.
Milli: Girlfriend... Friend.

Jake.
Milli: (replies instantly) Eyes. (She crosses her arms)

Sunita.
Milli: Watcher.

Ziggy.
Milli: Boobies. (stifles a laugh) Um, sorry. Jamaica?

A faded picture of her brother.
Milli: Ed... (eyes widen)
Wyndam-Pryce: Do you have any emotional response?
Milli: He's my brother... was... I love him... like... (defensively) like the proverbial brother.
Wyndam-Pryce: Thank you. You may go.
Milli: Can I ask - ?
Wyndam-Pryce: (cutting her off) Thank you, Millicent. Please show Mister Escher in.
Milli: ... Sure. No problem.

She heads into the office, clearly troubled. She sits away from the group, arms folded tightly across her chest, frowning.

Ziggy: How'd it go?
Milli: ...
Ziggy: Well, I really don't like him either, and I have to talk to him soon.

Escher stands in the tutorial room doorway.

Wyndam-Pryce: Well, Michael.

Escher's back stiffens as he walks in. Wyndam-Pryce leans back a little, seemingly relaxed and ignoring the rather intimidating atmosphere of the interview. He begins to chat casually.

Wyndam-Pryce: How was your week?
Escher: Largely uneventful. Apart from an outbreak of magically-induced conflict which saw Mrs. Green throw a mug at me during a faculty meeting. And Mister Chase's visit, of course.
Wyndam-Pryce: Good, good. Now, this won't take long. Look at this picture and tell me your immediate reaction.

A photograph of Escher's late wife. Escher swallows hard, looks away, and glares at Wyndam-Pryce. He watches Escher hesitate and showing a remarkable lack of sympathy or compassion…

Wyndam-Pryce: Have you ever managed to fill that gap in your life?
Escher: (coldly) Of course not. However, I have a duty to perform.
Wyndam-Pryce: (smiling) That will be all. If you could send Miss Chadha in next...

Jake arrives, looking pale and drawn. Emma looks up, nods slightly, and goes back to reading. He backs up.

Ziggy: Are you okay?
Jake: Yeah... you?
Ziggy: Same old thing.

Escher arrives, scowling, and beckons Sunita over.

Escher: Prepare yourself.

Su nods and heads into the interview room.

Wyndam-Pryce: So, Sunita. How long have you been here?
Sunita: Since the Council assigned me?
Wyndam-Pryce: And do you feel you have worked your way into a useful position for keeping us appraised of developments here?
Sunita: I suppose so...
Wyndam-Pryce: I see. Have you noted any tensions within the group? Something that might cause this, by all accounts rather delicate balance to fall?
Sunita: I don't know about that. There are certainly tensions, but... perhaps... they are necessary for the group to function as well as it does.
Wyndam-Pryce: Thank you. Now, if you could, tell me your first reactions to the following...

Jack.
Sunita: Jack... Um... Rolex? Football? Or is it rugby?

Andy.
Sunita: Bit confused. Likes scones. Lycanthrope.

Escher.
Sunita: Um... (looks flustered) Mentor. Teacher.
Wyndam-Pryce: Go on.
Sunita: It's Mister Escher. Respect.
Wyndam-Pryce: Thank you.

Jake.
Sunita: (goes red) Musician. Um. Psychic.
Wyndam-Pryce: What do you think of him?
Sunita: Um, he's... okay... I suppose.
Wyndam-Pryce: Are you trying to tell me you feel nothing but indifference?
Sunita: I suppose so.
Wyndam-Pryce: Sunita, this is not a casual conversation. I would advise you to give us as much information as you can.
Sunita: (warily) Have you read my report?
Wyndam-Pryce: Of course.
Sunita: That... incident with Jake was somewhat frightening. I've had a hard time coming to terms with the fact that it wasn't him.
Wyndam-Pryce: And have you?
Sunita: I will be indifferent. At some point. I'm working toward it.

Wyndam-Pryce: Very well then. Sunita, I like you. You have always been a very promising stundent and Watcher, which is why I want to give you this piece of advice. Do not form friendships with your charges. You are here to advise and guide them, that is all.
Sunita: Of course.
Wyndam-Pryce: And when dealing with civilians, we have a mission to protect even those whom we do not know. If you wish for a successful career within our society, I advise you concentrate on the mission, and not the specific civilians.
Sunita: Well, Jake isn't merely a civilian.
Wyndam-Pryce: Do not allow that to cloud your judgement. Mister DeVille is of interest to us, but he remains only one of your charges. Thank you.
Sunita: Right...
Wyndam-Pryce: Please send in Mister DeVille.
Sunita: Surely he is not under the (Wyndam-Pryce looks up earnestly) I'll just get him.

And she heads back into the office, sees Jake going over to see Emma, and pauses.

Em looks up from her magazine with a placid smile.

Jake: Um... how're you doing?
Emma: Okay, why? Oh, the gig. I was stressed out... That was a good song, by the way. It was very catchy.

Jake nods, confused, and heads back over to Ziggy.

Jake: What's goin' on?
Ziggy: Old guy came in to grill us. General bad vibes ever since. Dude, what's wrong with your face? You don't look like you slept at all. You should party more. Party good. Beer bad!
Jake: I'll bear that in mind. You been questioned yet?
Ziggy: Not yet.
Milli: He starts showing you pictures and says "what's the first thing to come into your head?"
Jake: So is he a qualified psychiatrist or a nutjob?
Milli: Take out the "utj" there.
Ziggy: Donut? Chocolate?
Jake: Think I need more coffee.
Ziggy: Oh, I made coffee too!
Jake: You know there's more there. So what's it like?
Milli: It's not that bad. He's just a git.
Ziggy: Not enough of a git to drag me away though. Yet.
Jake: I shouldn't have woken up this morning.
Milli: Just come quietly and act passive and domitable... dominatable?
Jake: Is that a word?
Milli: I know indomitable is...
Jake: Uh, yeah, More coffee. Any Ziggy didn't make?
Ziggy: DUDE! Are you dissing my coffee-making skillz. No donut for you!

Jake shakes his head and gets up. Sunita mumbles and points to the interview room. He nods wearily...

Wyndam-Pryce: So, I take it you do not respond to "Mister DeVille".
Jake: You take it right.
Wyndam-Pryce: How long have you been involved with the Prenticeship?
Jake: Since the year started.
Wyndam-Pryce: (casually flipping through the file) I believe, you've had problems with the legacy of your ancestry.
Jake: (narrows eyes) Nothing I couldn't deal with.
Wyndam-Pryce: Really? It says here you were about to kill a civilian when you were -
Jake: (angrily) I wasn't about to kill anybody.
Wyndam-Pryce: …and you kidnapped a student, and attacked several of our charges.
Jake: I didn't kidnap anyone.
Wyndam-Pryce: Of course not. That was 'Jacques'. (smiles thinly) Now, would you call your relations with the group as a whole friendly?
Jake: Yes...
Wyndam-Pryce: I'm going to show you some pictures, and I want your -
Jake: First reaction. This'll be a new experience.

Jack.
Jake: Rugby. He's a rugby player.

Andy.
Jake: Ex-flatmate.

Sunita.
Jake: TA.
Wyndam-Pryce: Anything more?
Jake: What she is, isn't she? I mean, she seems nice. The group's warmed to her.
Wyndam-Pryce: I did not ask about the group. How do you feel?
Jake: I think she fits into the sandpit very well.

Wyndam-Pryce drums his fingers against the overhead projector.

Wyndam-Pryce: Your abilities qualify you as a person of mild interest to us. We are currently allowing our assistants here to judge on their concerns over your safety. If you continue with this kind of back talk, we may change our mind.
Jake: Call them up, see what they say...

Another slide. Ziggy.

Jake: (guardedly) Ziggy's cool. I like Ziggy. A lot. I looooove Ziggy.
Wyndam-Pryce: Thank you. That will be all.
Jake: Really? Four members of the group? That's everything, is it?
Wyndam-Pryce: Yes. Oh… you do look rather tired.
Jake: I just need some rest and relaxation.
Wyndam-Pryce: I doubt that. Still, I have no interest in your lifetime.
Jake: I'll be going then.

He starts to push himself up and out of the chair.

Wyndam-Pryce: Not so fast, young man. Was it a dream, or a vision?
Jake: Neither. Sometimes I just don't sleep well.
Wyndam-Pryce: How do you feel about them?
Jake: Well... the visions can help people. So I accept them.
Wyndam-Pryce: Would you rather they were under your control?
Jake: I have more control than I used to.
Wyndam-Pryce: I doubt that. How would you feel if I told you, we could help you control them completely, maybe even get rid of them for you.
(Jake doesn't answer.)
Wyndam-Pryce: That is all.
Jake: I didn't think the Council had so much interest in civilians.
Wyndam-Pryce: You might be more than that. To some, you might be viewed as a useful tool.
Jake: (deadpan) You fill me with confidence.
Wyndam-Pryce: Send in Mister Roots now. Good day.

Jake stalks out to the office. He manages a smirk once he reaches the door.

Jake: You're up. They're looking for another tool.
Ziggy: Riiiight.
Milli: Kick his ass.

Mill watches Zig go.

Jake: Hmm. He stopped halfway... What is up with Ziggy? What did you do to him?
Milli: Wh-what?
Jake: Doesn't sound like him. The way he acts.
Milli: He's pretty much being Ziggy.
Jake: No... something in his tone.
Milli: What?
Jake: Kinda... subdued. I don't know...
Milli: Seemed bouncy enough to me. He made coffee, for crying out loud!
Jake: No, that's not it. My Spider-Sense is tingling.
Milli: Your what?
Jake: My, uh... ow!

He closes his eyes and grimaces.

Milli: Are you okay? Are you getting a vision?

Her concerned face flashes in a double-exposure with her face in a grimace of pain, spitting blood... She gasps " Ziggy..."

And a glimpse of a gloved hand holding a ritual dagger, stabbing into Milli's side...

And taking off the glove, we see the hand is black... could it be Ziggy's?

Emma (aloof): You okay?
Jake: I'll be back in a minute.

He gets up and stumbles to the door, blinking and shaking his head.

Milli follows him out, looking concerned.

Milli: What did you see?
Jake: ... Something's definitely not right with Ziggy.
Milli: What's wrong? What did you see?
Jake: Don't... I don't know.
Milli: (getting scared) What's wrong with him?
Jake: Just... stay away from Ziggy if you're on your own.
Milli: Can I... can I ask why exactly? You're really freaking me out.
Jake: Just... watch him...
Milli: You can't just tell me to stay away from my bo-from Ziggy.
Jake: What'd you say?
Milli: (blanches) ... Ziggy?
Jake: Before that...
Milli: I started saying my boyfriend. (they look at each other awkwardly) So, what was in the vision?

Jake looks away and says nothing. Milli starts to press the question, but Mr. Wyndam-Pryce's guards walk past and they watch them go. Emma looks out, after them.

Emma: Right, that's that then. Anybody want to go for a drink?
Jake: I'm not thirsty.
Milli: Yeah...
Sunita: Shouldn't we wait for Ziggy?
Emma: He knows where we'll be.
Sunita: Even so, we should wait until he comes out.
Milli: He's most likely to... not...
Emma: Fine. I'm just gonna go.

She shrugs noncommittally and heads off.

Jake: So, what are you saying?
Milli: Just tell me. What did you see? I'm not gonna let it drop.
Jake: Doesn't matter. I'm going for a walk.
Milli: But -
Jake: Just leave it.
Milli: Jake!

Jake heads off, still shaking his head. He turns back, almost but not quite meeting Milli's gaze.

Jake: Oh, congratulations by the way.
Milli: What? Oh right…yeah… thanks?
Jake: When did it happen? During the song? Which one?
Milli: Um... I can't really remember which one. It was all kind of a blur.
Jake: You weren't listening? (hurt) Fine.
Milli: NO! I mean, no. Of course I was listening!

Jake turns to leave, then turns back again.

Jake: Listen. I had a vision. Through Ziggy's eyes. Stabbing you. With a very ornate knife. You looked surprised... you were bleeding a lot. That's the vision. Happy now? 'Cause I'm not. See you.

Milli watches him go, open-mouthed.

Sunita: I'll just go check on them...

She knocks on the interview room door. No answer.

Sunita: Tea?

Nothing. She opens the door... and finds the room deserted. The chairs have been kicked over.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

07-12-2004, 02:31 PM

Sunita rushes into the office.

Sunita: They're gone!
Milli: What? Who's gone? They're gone?
Andy: I never got my chance to be interviewed...

The group don't even take time to give Andy a funny look. Milli runs flat out into the room. Escher follows close behind, and finds her standing in the middle of the floor, turning quickly, mouth agape.

Escher: We'll find them.
Milli: He's... just...
Escher: Milli.

She looks over.

Escher: We'll find them.

She nods slightly, then fumbles for her phone. No answer from Ziggy. She calls Emma...

Emma: Yes? Hello?
Milli: Can you see spells? Do that thing Ziggy does?
Emma: I... think I could. I could try.
Milli: Okay. Get over here. And I'm gonna call Jake.
Emma: Now?
Milli: YES!

Sitting on a bench in the court, Jake looks around. He notices nothing but sad faces all around. He shrugs and lights a cigarette... then looks up again. It isn't just his skewed perspective. Everyone around looks miserable. Nobody speaking, students just sitting lost in their thoughts. He flicks his smoke away and heads further afield. Reaching King's Row, he confirms that the effect is localised. People across the street are taking note of the people lying on the pavement in silence... Then he jumps as his phone goes off.

Jake: What?
Milli: Get back here, they've taken Ziggy.

Emma looks around the tutorial room, holding and slowly spinning a plumbline.

Emma: Yeah... there was some magic used. I can't follow where it led though. That would take a ritual...
Milli: Can I help?
Emma: (vaguely) I'll ask William.
Milli: Em?
Emma: William's more likely to know.

She shrugs and heads off to the office. Milli watches her go, trembles, and kicks Wyndam-Pryce's chair across the room. As Emma walks in, she finds Escher on the phone to Chase. She pays him no mind and goes to the restricted stacks.

Escher: Was the plan to extract Ziggy?
Chase: I don't know what you mean, old man.
Escher: Have you taken him?
Chase: If you can't keep track of your students that's hardly my problem.

Jake stumbles in.

Jake: Okay, what's going on?
Milli: Mister Wyndam-Pryce has taken Ziggy.
Escher: Or vice versa. (off Milli's glare) Consider who is the sorcerer...
Milli: Oh. Yeah. (deflated) That's just as likely. Sorry about that. (she shakes her head)
Jake: Yeah, well, there's -
Emma: We need a Cross of Ameda.
Milli: We need to know what happened...

Jake nods and heads into the tutorial room. Picking up Wyndam-Pryce's chair, he sees Wyndam-Pryce look shocked, rise quickly out of his chair, and then a blast of white light.

Jake: ow... Something appeared. Wyndam-Pryce didn't know about it.
Milli: Oh God. Is there any way of knowing what they did?
Jake: I'm not the magician, Ziggy... (more gently) Ziggy is.

Heading over and putting a hand on Ziggy's chair, all he sees is light.

Jake: Oh no… you bloody idiot! You fool. What have you done?
Milli: What?
Jake: He was pointing at Ziggy. Might not have been someone else.
Milli: Ziggy wouldn't... I'd say "be that stupid" but we all know the truth... but he wouldn't do that, would he?
Jake: He seems to have.
Milli takes the chair from Jake, and hefts it as if to throw it.

Escher: Milli...
Milli: Uh, sorry.

She points to the other chair, lying against the wall.

Milli: That was me too.
Jake: I don't think Ziggy's right in the head.
Milli: (bitterly) Thanks. Thanks a lot.
Jake: I didn't mean... he was actin' weird before he came in here. Even beside saying he was your...

Milli storms out of the room to think. Jake shakes his head in frustration and looks over to Escher, who folds his arms and shrugs. The silence is interrupted by Emma flipping pages, busily researching.

Jake: Everybody outside's, I dunno, depressed or something.

Andy heads outside, and finds Jack wandering along the hall, kicking the floor. He heads back inside with a shake of his head.

Sunita: Where would Mister Wyndam-Pryce have taken him?
Jake: If Ziggy didn't do it.
Milli: (glares) He didn't. Where and why?
Sunita: Wouldn't Ziggy just have left him?
Jake: You're trying to second-guess Ziggy?

The office phone rings. Escher answers.

Milli: Andy, did Ziggy seem weird to you?
Andy: Hm? Oh, like, he was generous. Not like usually, all he gets us is water...
Milli: So, not evil and possessed? See? It was really him. Evil does not bring donuts!

Escher: That was the coven. Apparently something magical is growing quickly out of control here, and it may manifest into a vortex.
Milli: What's a magical vortex?
Emma: We'll know it when it kills us.

Milli furrows her brow. Emma shrugs vaguely.

Emma: Doesn't sound good. Probably isn't.
Milli: What would cause it?
Emma: Too much magic in one area, it builds up, causes a chain reaction...
Jake: Like what? Like... what's going on outside?
Milli: Can you try a spell?
Emma: I can try...
Escher: Try.
Milli: I'm sorry to put so much pressure on you.
Emma: It's fine... Not like I had anything planned for today.

Su calls the coven back. She is answered by Fiona Bartendale, the group leader.

Sunita: Can you find the focal point?
Fiona: Not yet. It may manifest itself when it's...
Sunita: Too late?
Fiona: Or shortly before. The best documented example of this kind of magical oversaturation was in South America in the early 1920s. The demon unleashed ran amok for a season and destroyed several villages in Argentina.
Sunita: Right. Er, what can we do?
Fiona: Stop the flow of power. Once the effect starts feeding itself, it has to be cut off from its source.
Sunita: Can you come here?
Fiona: We can't just teleport over there, you know. That could make it worse.

Milli paces nervously.

Jake: Why weren't we affected?
Escher: The warding?
Andy: We? I feel... blah...
William: You went outside...

Sunita: We need to find the centre of the effect before it manifests. We need someone who can do that.
Emma: Another sorcerer, I suppose.
Jake: What about that guy that was summoning the succubus? He was an idiot but he might be capable.
Sunita: We need someone who can see energy lines.
Jake: Don't look at me...

They're interrupted by sobbing from outside. Looking out, they find Jack huddled by the door, crying.

Jake: It's okay, dude, we'll find him!
Jack: I wanted a train set for Christmas... not a stupid game...
Jake: Dude. What the hell?
Jack: And, and Rob said I was fat. Not fat... And mum and dad... keep yelling...

Milli warily puts a hand on his shoulder.

Milli: What is wrong with you?
Jack: So nice to her. Didn't even give me her number.
Milli: I thought you were with Michelle...
Jack: Who?
Milli: Jack... what age are you?
Jack: Nineteen... (sniffle) is Michelle someone I'd like? Not like anybody likes me...
Milli: True.
Jack: Oh yeah, pile on the guy with the broken heart, why don't you?
Milli: You have a broken heart?
Jack: Everything's falling apart...

Jake shakes his head and rises to go. Andy gives Jack a hug, and starts crying himself. Jake watches Andy drag Jack inside, grimacing.

Jake: I ever get like that, knock me out and lock me in a cupboard.
Milli: You're not feeling down... are you?
Jake: (bitterly) Top o' the world. (looks down) I don't think it's the spell.
Milli: (stares at him, trying to read his expression) You don't?
Jake: No... (looks around, avoiding her)... Where did Emma go?

Sunita marches up to the room assigned to the shmuck, whose name is apparently Freddy. She hammers on the door until he opens it, and starts crying as soon as he sees her.

Freddy: I'm so sorrreeeee...
Sunita: Yes, yes. Put some clothes on.

Milli and Jake look for Emma, when Milli's phone beeps. A text, from Emma…

HELP!

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

07-12-2004, 02:33 PM

Ziggy and Mr. Wyndam-Pryce are standing on a grass plane. It is a bright sunny day. Ziggy turns around to him, looking annoyed.

Ziggy: You better start talking now, Grandpa. Who the hell was that guy? Why did he appear out of nowhere? Why was he carrying a gun? And have you ever been to a Turkish prison?
Wyndam-Pryce: What?
Ziggy: You're still not talking! I have a huge headache, just getting us here... so don't start stalling on me or I'll pull eggs out of your mouth till you cluck like a chicken.
Wyndam-Pryce: Very well. (pauses) Apparently, someone in the council felt that our original plan of removing you from Cambridge was not as promising and efficient as could be and has opted for a more direct approach to solving the problem.
Ziggy: Yeah, I was expecting jack-booted thugs to drag me off to some labour camp there... not some skinny freak trying to put holes in you. Not that I like you that much, mind you. I probably would have kicked your ass seven shades of purple if you'd come after me. It's more of a general thing... what with the ethics and all and the not killing people. I got that from Milli. She's great... can be a cute as a button, when she's not trying to kick me... You know Milli? Sure you do... you did the whole interview thing.
Wyndam-Pryce: YES, I KNOW.
Ziggy: I wasn't finished.
Wyndam-Pryce: Neither was I.
Ziggy: Fine. Be like that. Sheesh... go on then.
Wyndam-Pryce: He suggested if we could make it seem like you were involved in some serious crime, such as the murder of a Watcher, your 'friends' wouldn't be so opposed to your removal from their group. Fortunately for Miss Chadha, I... we decided against it and chose a less aggressive approach.
Ziggy: You are a screwed up bunch, aren't you?
Wyndam-Pryce: Don't flatter yourself thinking you could even begin to comprehend the burden and the responsibility of being a Watcher. We must protect this world from all kinds of unspeakable horrors, and if we need to sacrifice ourselves to do it, then that is what we will do. I know that. Miss Chadha knows that. Even your friend Miss Blackhurst... Milli knows it.

Jake and Milli run.

Radiohead's Just plays as they run, intercut with Jack and Andy sobbing as Margot tries to reassure them... Tessa and Rachel drowning their sorrows behind the bar...

Tessa: Bastards!
Rachel: Bastards!
Tessa: Why did he have to... bastard...

... Lawrence gazing tearfully at a photo of himself and Sophie, Henry and Ginny sitting together but looking away, Rosalind sniffling and throwing away her mobile phone...

Jake reaches the door of Emma's room... then it smashes across the hall. A huge figure in black robes, face shadowed by a hood, emerges, and walks right through him. He drops to his knees, gasping for air. It seems to fade, like a shadow in weakening light, as Milli catches up and backs away, reaching for her crossbow. The bolt flies through the figure to no effect. She goes to help Jake up.

Milli: Are you okay?
Jake: I think... we've found the source of... the depression...

He stumbles over to Emma's room. Em sits in darkness, glaring at an empty chair across from her, mumbling to herself.

Emma: It wasn't supposed to happen like this... It wasn't supposed to...
Milli: How about you talk to your girlfriend and I get the ghosty thing?
Jake: She's not my girlfriend.

Jake turns and sits opposite Emma.

Jake: What was that?
Emma: Nothing...
Jake: What did you do?

Her expression flickers from anger to sorrow.

Emma: ... so easy just to forget... but no... stupid spell had to backfire... stupid spell...

Sunita marches Freddy outside.

Sunita: Where's it coming from?
Freddy: I dunno... (she slaps him lightly) ow... over there...

He points, and Sunita rocks back on her heels as she sees the wraithlike figure emerge through a wall... and turn its head towards her...

Ziggy and Wyndam-Pryce are standing opposite one another and glaring.

Ziggy: I can't believe you people would do that. The bloody water!
Wyndam-Pryce: We do what needs to be done. And we take care of our own. You not being one of them, anymore.
Ziggy: Really? The way Travers wants to get his hands all over me, you'd think I was Bob MacGuffin or a six year old boy.
Wyndam-Pryce: I'm afraid you've become a mere chess piece to both Quentin and the Council. As it stands there are numerous factions trying to use you and your situation as a bargaining chip for gaining more influence in the Council. How we handle the threat of you and your family will decide the course the Council is likely to take in the future.
Ziggy: From bumbling effeminate morons to cold-hearted murdering bastards?
Wyndam-Pryce: I can assure you I have no interest in turning our institution into a wretched hive of scum and villainy.

Ziggy smirks, but Wyndam-Pryce ignores him.

Wyndam-Pryce: And neither does Quentin Travers. He seeks to control the more dangerous elements in this. He does have the best interests for all involved at heart. We neither wish to hurt nor unnecessarily endanger your friends.
Ziggy: Of course not. He just wants to keep this house he built, safe and sound.
Wyndam-Pryce: Exactly.
Ziggy: By keeping me on a tight leash. Like a dog.
Wyndam-Pryce: (looks down) You are right. Let me assure you, going through with this plan was not an easy decision to make. This amount of subterfuge and manipulation of our own is not something I approve of. But my authority is limited.
Ziggy: (looking up) Really?

Jake sits opposite Emma. She glares, eyes red from crying. He speaks as gently as he can...

Jake: What did you do?
Emma: Just a spell. A simple spell that takes away some of your memories... I figured happy memories would be easy... So I wouldn't remember... us... so I wouldn't care. But, no, apparently my life isn't ruined enough...
Jake: Didn't you notice what was happening?
Emma: No... I couldn't feel... Just my problem. Thought I wanted that. For this not to hurt, like it doesn't hurt you...
Jake: Do you... do you think this is easy for me? It isn't... But you have...

She grimaces and her voice rises.

Emma: What do I have? Huh? Shopping?!

Jake looks away. Emma slumps back in her chair, starting to cry again.

Jake: What was that black hooded thing?
Emma: The thing I let out. It feeds on your memories. Happy memories. Everything that ever made you laugh... made you smile... it sucks it out of you.

Sunita backs away, fumbling with her pistol crossbow. And then Milli leaps down a flight of steps and plunges her enchanted sword into the shrouded figure's back. She almost falls through it, but her sword bites. The thing rears up with a hiss as blue light oozes out of the slash down its back. It stumbles into a car, smashing its side in, crawls onto the roof and leaps off, robe unfurling like ragged wings, and flies.

Sunita's crossbow bolt flies through it to no effect, as it becomes transparent. Milli squints to try and track it...

Milli: It's heading for the office...

Emma and Jake glare at each other.

Jake: Why?
Emma: Why do you think?
Jake: ... Can you stop it?
Emma: Don't you think I would? (sobs)
Jake: When did you know it went wrong?
Emma: About the time it came and thanked me.

Lying by the office door, Andy shivers as a shadow passes over him. Then liquid blue light drips out of one of its wounds and onto his back... and he remembers Ginny, aged six, running around the garden...
The shadow reforms into the hooded spirit. It hisses as it floats across the office. Then pauses as Escher steps out of the stacks, drawing a sword.

Escher: Come on then.
Spirit: You have nothing I seek.
Escher: Well then, what are you here for?

The thing points to the shelves. Escher raises his sword and lashes out - the blade passing through it.

Andy stumbles to his feet, snarling incoherently, and lurches towards the spirit, bones snapping and muscles shifting. Escher backs away as Andy transforms and claws the thing's arm off. It cries out in pain, causing Esher to flinch at the piercing sound it makes. Milli rushes in, sword at the ready. Escher backs away from the hissing spirit, reaching for the severed arm. His hand passes through it, and he shivers.
The thing whirls around and grabs Andy, shoving him away. As it does, its hood falls away.
Andy sees facial features shifting between Benjamin Roots, Valdermar, and his own lycanthropic form. He stumbles away, and starts to revert to human form, horrified.
Escher sees it flicker between a snarling vampire and a handsome middle-aged man smiling cruelly.

Milli doesn't look. She just stabs it in the face.

Its robes turn fiery red and it starts to glow, cracks of blue light spreading across it. Flashes of energy fly off in all directions.

Emma is suddenly struck in the heart by a blue glow. She giggles momentarily, then slumps over.

Jake: Are you... getting your memories back?
Emma: I think so...

The spirit lashes out. Milli dodges, and stabs it through the chest, impaling the book behind it. It hisses again... staring into Milli's eyes.

Spirit: I will come for you. Soon.
Milli: Okay. (smirks) I've kinda got a boyfriend already, though.

With that, the thing explodes in a flash of light, knocking everyone off their feet.

Emma tenses and rears up as she's hit by hundreds upon hundreds of bright lights rushing into her. She tries to scream, makes no sound, and falls to the floor, curling into a foetal position. Jake stumbles to his feet, picks her up, and lays her on her bed. Leaning against the wall, he retrieves his phone.

Wyndam-Pryce sits on a rock, deep in thought. Ziggy stands behind him looking into the distance.

Wyndam-Pryce: What you're proposing is foolish at best. If it fails, it will be impossible for me to stop the Council from taking you. I cannot even guarantee that they will keep you alive.
Ziggy: I know. But I can take him. As long as you can assure me that you will give us some room for now. If you start meddling with this, it'll all blow up in our faces. And I like our faces. Well I like Milli's... and mine. Yours, not so much. But I'm warming up to it.
Wyndam-Pryce: (deadpan) Thank you. When are you going to attempt this?
Ziggy: As soon as we get back. You should be able to parade him in front of the Council in a few days from now.
Wyndam-Pryce: Are you going to tell your friends?
Ziggy: I can't. He'll be able to read them. Just make sure if something happens, tell them... tell Milli the truth. But for now, just tell them what your people did, that should be enough.

Ziggy waves his hand a little and a white portal of light appears before them.

Escher helps Milli up and looks across at the ringing phone.

Jake: Hey. You stopped it?
Escher: Just.
Jake: I found the source... I think she'll be okay...
Escher: She?

Andy: God I was bummed. Jack? You okay?
Jack: Yeah. Was someone cooking with onions in here?

Milli: Who was that?
Escher: Jake. He says she'll be okay.

Milli nods and heads for the door. Just then, a flash of white light fills the room, and Ziggy steps out, holding Mister Wyndam-Pryce by the collar. Nobody speaks.

Milli: Ziggy?
Ziggy: Sorry, I was waiting for him to start. (looks to Wyndam-Pryce) Go ahead. Roger.
Wyndam-Pryce: As you are doubtless aware, some of our members have been keeping watch on you. On, ah, some finer elements of your condition here.
Ziggy: In English.
Wyndam-Pryce: There has been some debate as to how to remedy Mister Roots's overall threat without endangering general goodwill within the Prenticeship. After all, we are not monsters. We would not take a friend from a friend...

He smiles coldly. Milli tightens her grip on her sword.

Escher: Speak quickly.
Wyndam-Pryce: Mister Roots is a liability. You cannot deny that.
Milli: Watch us.
Wyndam-Pryce: A danger to you, and the world around you. The world we are sworn to protect. Even from our friends, if we must.

Milli steps closer, sword raised.

Wyndam-Pryce: If you are trying to threaten me, Miss Blackhurst, you needn't bother.
Milli: I'm going to let you finish before I kill you. Think about what you have to say.
Wyndam-Pryce: Very well. This inspection was with a mind to deciding whether to continue the current methods. I have it in my power to discontinue them.
Milli: What methods?
Wyndam-Pryce: Introducing... substances into his water supply, to ensure he was pliable. Less likely to be a danger. However, all it did (rolls his eyes) was make him talk even more... Now, if you'll excuse me.
Milli: You're excused.

She steps away and lowers the sword. Escher leans in, puts a hand on Wyndam-Pryce's shoulder, guides him to the door, and then gives him a headbutt.

Jake steps out of Emma's room, picks up the door and tries to put it back in place... then clutches his head as the vision returns.

He sees from the perspective of the man wielding the knife, as he looks around. He sees Andy lying on the floor, beaten and bloodied. William hanging from a spike protruding from his chest. Himself holding his sword to his own throat, apparently trying to stop himself cutting his own throat. Milli gasps "you're not Ziggy..." and falls. Behind her, Ziggy stands, trembling, eyes jet black, lightning arcing around him...

And we cut to Ziggy, looking concerned.

Ziggy: You okay?
Milli: Please, just go.
Ziggy: Is this about what he said?
Milli: GO!

Ziggy stands his ground. Milli draws her sword and puts the point to Ziggy's throat.

Milli: I said go.
Ziggy: Why?
Milli: Because I said to.
Ziggy: You need to give me more than that.
Milli: Please. Just go.

Milli starts to tear up. She lifts her sword a little, scraping Ziggy's throat. Ziggy's eyes narrow.

Ziggy: No... I've no idea what brought this on, but I'm not leaving until you talk to me. You can't go on about how we need to tell each other things, how we need to trust each other, and then shutting me out. I don't care what it is, but we can work it out.
Milli: It's just... it's just really hard to know what's going on sometimes, with you. You're so all over the place and you change so much - do you have any idea how terrified I was when I found out just what you could do and how powerful you actually are? And of course then there's your family history and everything... I dunno. I can never be completely sure you're who I think you are.
Ziggy: It's me. Ziggy. The guy who always says the least appropriate things at the wrong moment. I giggle when somebody says boobies. I'm the one who made a whole pub fall asleep just to tell you that I love you. I'm the guy you kissed in Escher's side-office... I'm here because I care about you and I'd never do anything to hurt you.
Milli: I know all that. I'm just worried that some day, someone'll cast the right spell, or say the right thing, and you'll disappear, to be replaced with…something else.
Ziggy: I don't know what's going to happen. I don't know where we're going to go after this. But one thing that will never change is how I feel about you. Every step we take from here will be new. It will be scary. I can't promise you this will ever get easier. But you're not alone in this. I'll be here all the way. We will make this work. Let's just take it one step at a time.
Milli: Yeah, I know we should, but it's all... It's all so new, and different, that it's incredibly easy for me to question why it's all happening, and wonder whether I've just been taken in by a spell, or a curse or something...
Ziggy: This isn't magic. This is real. This is me. Have a little faith in me... in us and we'll get through anything together.

Jake steps warily into the office.

Jake: I got Ginny to look in on Emma. Where's Milli?
Escher: The practice room. I'd knock before entering.
Jake: And Ziggy?
Escher: I believe he went after her.

He nods, and heads that way... then turns away.

Cut back to Emma, still lying in her bed. Her eyes are wide open and expressionless. A tear runs down her cheek... Her lips are moving slowly... almost inaudible...

Emma: It's... all... too... beautiful.

CREDITS!
GRR! ARG!

Craig Oxbrow

07-12-2004, 02:37 PM

Escher V/O: Next time on The Watch House:

Adelia talking to Ziggy, looking nervous.

Adelia: It's starting. The alignment.

Sunita looking at a stylised comet design in one of the books.

Sunita: A symbol of waxing and waning power...

The same symbol tattooed on Ziggy's shoulder blade.

Milli and Jake running from a cloud of formless darkness chasing them.

Milli yelling at Ziggy.

Ziggy sitting alone in a dark room. Holding a gun in his lap. Waiting.

Milli: Don't say I won't be there fighting. I'll fight to the end. I just know it is gonna be a fight to the end.

Escher V/O: The next episode of The Watch House is Where The Circle Ends.

--
DVD Commentary

Joe: I used to think the theme tune was a bit too maudlin, but now it fits!

Actual Play bit

Sitting in on a session of your own game with someone else in the Director's chair is quite a strange experience. It went well, and Joe kept to the ground rules I set, although he smacked Emma around rather more than I would have liked (and this also killed the "Emma uses magic while miserable" episode I had in mind, but there you go) and made the Watchers' methods more insidious than I'd had in mind.

I also didn't get as involved as I would have liked. Considering the circumstances of the episode made my first logical choice for a PC, Emma, impossible, I played Escher instead. I didn't do as much as I would have liked, but I got to give him some fatherly concern and some badassosity...

morgue

07-12-2004, 03:23 PM

Damn. Cool. Yay.

Joe Dizzy

07-12-2004, 03:47 PM

Two of my favourite lines disappeared in the write-up unfortunately.

Other than that, it was a lot of fun. The reason why the scenes between Ziggy and Wyndham-Pryce are so wordy, is because I had to re-insert them as cut-scenes after the game. They are essentially exposition and fore-shadowing scenes for the finale, so including them in the game would have been confusing and boring to the players.

The final exchange between Ziggy and Milli had to be slightly re-edited afterwards, as Cat and I were quite disappointed with the actual exchange. It would have made the next couple of episodes less focussed and messed up the relationships between the characters had we left it as it was.

Joe

Craig Oxbrow

07-12-2004, 03:52 PM

Two of my favourite lines disappeared in the write-up unfortunately.
Which were what now? :confused:

Edit: They're fixed now. See if you can find them! :D

SteveD

07-25-2004, 07:50 AM

I'm always keen to know when I've tricked my players, so let me say this now: this totally pwned me. Totally didn't see the twist coming!

And I love the Ziggy-Milli relationship. It's amazingly poignant and realistic. And I can't wait to see how it comes out.

Kudos to everybody for one of the most amazing games I've ever had the privelige to read.

Steve

Craig Oxbrow

07-25-2004, 08:21 AM

Kudos to everybody for one of the most amazing games I've ever had the privelige to read.
Many thanks for the kind words. And it's the most amazing game I've ever had the privilege to take part in.

Craig Oxbrow

08-02-2004, 07:20 PM

The Watch House 2.16: Where The Circle Ends

Milli: punkette angst-fuelled Watcher trainee
Ziggy: badass sorcerer and son of supervillain, genuinely concerned about Milli
Jake: psychic civilian currently feeling rather guilty and lost
Sunita: Watchers' Council very proper teaching assistant
William: Mister Watcher Trainee

(Absentee)
Andy: quiet unassuming hereditary lycanthrope, in control, oh yeah, you betcha
Jack: comes and goes like the wind

(NPC)
Escher: dour but fatherly Watchers' trainer
Emma: Jake's broken-hearted spellcasting ex
Margot: Watchers' Council fairly slapdash teaching assistant
Charlotte: William's unaware civilian girlfriend
Michelle: member of the Society for Psychical Research and asker of awkward questions
Benjamin: Ziggy's father, ruthless warlock and businessman
Adelia: Ziggy's sister, loyalty to her father seemingly less than 100%

Previously on The Watch House:

The Roots family.

Adelia approaching Milli with cryptic advice.

Milli gazing up at Jake on stage at his first gig...

Milli and Ziggy waking up in each other's bodies.
"Milli" in a School Disco outfit freeing "Ziggy" and returning their souls to their own bodies.

Milli: Oh my God, with talking, oh you didn't...
Ziggy: Oh, that? Yeah, I did.
Milli: I hate you more than you can possibly comprehend...

Ziggy: I think he's kinda messing you around, and I was trying to, y'know, push him into actually saying something to you about it.

Milli and Ziggy's first kiss could reasonably be described as awkward.

Compare it with Milli and Jake's...

A spot inspection by Roger Wyndam-Pryce is interrupted by Ziggy teleporting them both away.
And a dark hooded figure drifting through the campus, gathering up the happy memories torn loose from everyone around by a backfiring spell of Emma's.
Milli kills the robed demon, everyone starts to recover, and Emma collapses, sobbing and rocking back and forth...

Craig Oxbrow

08-02-2004, 07:26 PM

We open with a closeup of a poster advertising the Summer Mingle, the end-of-term ball. Milli and Ziggy pass it on the way to the office.

Emma's notable by her absence when they arrive. Jack the reverse.

Jack: You an' him?
Milli: Huh?
Jack: Well, no accounting for taste.
Ziggy: What's that supposed to mean?
Jack: Still, not really a surprise, you argue like an old married couple.
Milli: Not any more.
Ziggy: I'm just gonna sit here and watch you dig a hole for yourself. That's what friends do. Well, not friends. Mortal enemies...

Escher nods. Milli looks at him funny. He smiles warmly.

Escher: Now, as I understand it, your natural mystical abilities have been boosted by some kind of ritual, and your father seeks to siphon that power away...
Ziggy: Oh? Cool!
Escher: I see. And you bear a mark of some kind?
Ziggy: Yeah...
Jake: you have a pentagram on your back you forgot to mention?
Ziggy: Not a pentagram...

Escher opens a book filled with occult sigils and glyphs.

Escher: One of these?
Ziggy: Sort of like that one. Less sharp edges.

Escher turns the book around and taps the noted symbol, a stylised comet.

Escher: Yes. Hmm. I'll see what we can make of the markings.
Jake: Would it not be better just showing us?
Ziggy: Are you coming on to me?
Jake: C'mon, show me yours an' I'll show you mine...
Ziggy: This is the worst rebound I've ever seen...

Escher tuts.

Escher: Well, I've heard nothing from the Council since Mister Wyndam-Pryce's inspection.
Ziggy: I'm not smiling. Really.
Escher: Of course, even if this is a cessation rather than a lull in hostilities, that still leaves the threat from his background.

And with that, we cut to Adelia stepping out of a cab, putting on a pair of sunglasses as she heads into one of the staircases, along the corridor of flats, and stops at a door. She looks at it for a moment, it swings open and she steps into Andy's room...

CREDITS!

Craig Oxbrow

08-02-2004, 07:29 PM

Ziggy waits for Sunita to prepare her camera to take pictures of his back.

Ziggy: So there was this, um, poster?
Milli: Poster? For what?
Ziggy: The Mingle.
Milli: Oh, that. Yeah?
William: We're going.
Milli: Have fun.
Ziggy: Last time I asked you to the dance, you cried... I'm hoping I might not get the same reaction this time...
Milli: Are you kidding me?
Ziggy: No... what's wrong with the Mingle?
Milli: You picture me in a pretty dress and shoes?
Ziggy: Well, I've seen you dressed up, you looked...
Milli: (irritably) Yeah, when you took over my body -

Milli shuts her mouth as they realise what she just said. Jake looks at them suspiciously.

Jake: Did you just say what I think you just said?
Ziggy: Yeah, uh... cook over my bondy. A kind of Jamaican cookie recipe.
Milli: Much as it pains me to say it, that's what I said.

Everyone shares a look...

Ziggy: So that's a no then?
William: Should I get you guys tickets?
Milli: No!
Ziggy: Yes!
Milli: Ziggy can get one.
Ziggy: ... I'll get back to you.

Milli shakes her head and mouths NO to William several times.

William: So...?
Milli: One for Ziggy, no for me.

Sunita returns, with both heavy-duty and Polaroid cameras.

Sunita: What are we discussing?
Milli: The Mingle. William and Charlotte are going. Oh, you should go?
Sunita: Are you going?
Milli: Nooooo...
Sunita: Well, I don't have a date...
Milli: Well, Ziggy's going and I'm not! You can go with Ziggy! (grins)
Sunita: But, you're a... a new couple...
Milli: Oh, we're fine. It's just a dance. And anyway, I don't mingle well with other children. (smirks)
Sunita: Well, if everyone's going...
Ziggy: Not everyone...
Milli: He wants to go. I don't want to go. Go ahead.
Ziggy: Mill...
Milli: What part of "I'm not going" do you not get?
William: I'll get some tickets. (off Milli's look) For the group.

Jake shakes his head and goes back to reading up on the mystical properties of tattoos.

Jake: Tattoos can be used to find their wearers by some spells.
Sunita: So we could replicate the design... on someone else... hang on, that's a little dangerous...
Jack: Jake's got tattoos already.
Sunita: Yes, well, we could...
Jake: Not liking this plan.
Ziggy: So can I look, or am I supposed to stay away from the books?

He looks across at Jake, sitting to the side... with the pages of his book flipping without being touched. He leans in and murmurs:

Ziggy: Dude. Coffee?

Jake blinks, and the pages fall back. He looks at what he was doing, and looks around to see if anyone else noticed...

Jake: Oh... uh... right.

Ziggy nods and goes to make some coffee as Jake turns a page, very deliberately, by hand.

Milli winces as she tries to gulp down a mouthful of Ziggy's brew.

Sunita: Now, can we take a look at your back?
Ziggy: He (points to Jake) doesn't get to. Scared of him now.
Jake: Bet mine are bigger, baby...
Milli shakes her head and takes no further notice.

Sunita wanders around the office checking the light meter. Margot takes a sip of coffee, blinks repeatedly, and regrets the room's lack of pot plants. Ziggy hands a cup to Jake, who takes it rather warily, and talks to him quietly.

Ziggy: So! Jake! Ma man! Been to the circus then, I see... Nice little trick you learned...
Jake: Er...
Ziggy: Hey, if you learned something useful from that night, great. I'm not judging.
Jake: ... Cheers, man.

Ziggy takes his shirt off and Sunita takes pictures of his back, rather purposely focusing just on the tattoo and not the rest of the topless Zig. She shakes the Polaroid picture, partially to fan herself.

Milli: So what kind of cameras did you use? Will these have to be developed?
Sunita: Well, I took some Polaroid shots too.
Milli: Can I see? (looks) Hmm.
Ziggy: (Also looks) Yeah. So are you sure about the Mingle?

Milli gives him The Look.

Milli: Sunita really wants to go.
Sunita: Well, I mean, I'd like to, if other people, I don't have anyone...

She looks away from Ziggy and Milli, and very purposely not at Jake.

Ziggy: Don't mind at all.
Milli: Neither do I. In fact, I insist. It's a great idea.
Ziggy: Yeah, brilliant idea. There'll be dancing involved. Evil.
Milli: Nah, it's just a Mingle...

Su gets out of arm's length of either of them, by going to check the books.

Sunita: So, a comet. Descending? Maybe some astrological significance?
Ziggy: Maybe... I should go check something.

Ziggy heads off by himself. He reaches his room... and finds Adelia sitting outside, waiting. He stays out of arm's reach. She looks up, brow furrowed.

Ziggy: Uh... hi.
Adelia: This... isn't easy for me. But I 'ave to say it. It's starting. The alignment. The time when our father can draw the most power from us... from all[ of us. (look around warily)
Ziggy: I thought about that.
Adelia: I... I can't stay. Your friend Andrew knows how to reach me. I'll contact you soon.

And with that, she disappears.

Mill steps out for a smoke. Jake gets up to follow her.

Margot watches them go, and goes over to the side office to speak to Escher.

Margot: This thing with Jake and Ziggy. Have you even talked to her about it?
Escher: I... I suppose I try not to pry.
Margot: Maybe you should, a little. The way they act, it's clear that she feels... They're more than friends, and that can't work, and you know it.
Escher: I'm not her father, Margot.
Margot: But you might as well be. She looks up to you. She may never say it, but she does. And I just think, at her age, it's easy to get in over your head. She could make some really painful decisions here. Trust me on this one.
Escher: ... I'll keep an eye on it.

Jake: Hey.
Milli: Umm... hi.
Jake: So, I figured you'd be going to the Mingle.
Milli: I'm just not a Mingle-y person.

She stubs out her half-smoke cigarette.

Jake: It was the schoolgirl thing, wasn't it?
Milli: What?
Jake: When you changed bodies.
Milli: (coughs) Oh... um... Yeah. It was some kinda Ziggy thing. Kinda curse kinda thing.
Jake: It makes sense you guys are close, you've seen things from each other's outlook...
Milli: Did you see what he did? (sarcastic) Yeah, that's made us closer!
Jake: Uh, well, yeah.
Milli: Yeah... So anything I said that day, wasn't me.
Jake: And what Ziggy was saying was you.
Milli: Uh... not necessarily. Kinda hard to explain when we switched back... I mean, we didn't have time to change till later. I dunno. It was ages ago. I can't remember...
Jake: Ziggy in a suit was you, though. Right?
Milli: Not all the time, no. In the morning yeah, and some of the afternoon... but... um...

Jake nods as Milli looks at her boots, then sneaks back inside.

Jack: So... you and him switched -
Milli: Bugger off, Jack.
Jack: Right you are.

Ziggy returns.

Margot: Where were you?
Ziggy: There are these buildings in town, and you walk into them, and there are people inside. I wanted to try that.
Jake: Yeah... well, the only one we wanna walk in on is the one with your family in it.
Ziggy: I'll see what I can do. Um... Milli, can I talk to you?

They step outside.

Milli: What's up?
Ziggy: I have some hideously good news and some not so good news.
Milli: Uh-huh...
Ziggy: Now, it took me a while to work this out, but I'm thinking you don't want to go to the Mingle.
Milli: (sarcastic) Well done! Is that the good news?
Ziggy: Yeah, well... I thought it might be fun to go.

He looks down, shrugs, then looks back into her eyes as he retrieves a small cylindrical package from a pocket.

Ziggy: And... I thought I might buy you something. I was going to give it to you there, but... Before you open it, I ran into my sister.
Milli: Oh, God.
Ziggy: She says the alignment's coming soon.
Milli: Oh.
Ziggy: Yeah.
Milli: How soon is soon?
Ziggy: Days, maybe.

Milli gulps.

Milli: So what is this, a goodbye present?
Ziggy: No. This is... no secrets.

Zig hands it over and Mill opens it, finding a small scroll bound by a band.

Milli: What is this?
Ziggy: It's a promise. Open it.

She unrolls and reads the scroll, then looks back up at Ziggy, meeting his gaze.

Milli: I don't know if I can accept this... I'm not sure it’s really a good time to say...
Ziggy: (hesitates) Whatever happens... no matter how bad it gets... this is what I promise.

Milli nods slightly, looking troubled, and rolls the scroll up.

Ziggy: Uh, we should tell the others. And start packin' heat.
Milli: Yeah, I know...
Ziggy: You coming?
Milli: In a minute.

She sits on the bench in the corridor, looking at the rolled-up scroll, lost in thought...

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

08-02-2004, 07:32 PM

Emma approaches Milli, pausing before actually going over to her.

Emma: Hi. Uh, how are you?
Milli: Hey. How are you?
Emma: I was just wondering if I should come in and tell everybody I'm sorry.
Milli: They know. You should just go in.
Emma: Really?
Milli: Yeah.
Emma: Is... is Jake around?
Milli: Yeah.
Emma: How are you getting on?
Milli: Fine.
Emma: Good. (smiles softly) I mean, he's lucky to have you.
Milli: (looks puzzled) Uh... what?
Emma: I mean, I know you really like him and it's obvious he really likes you...
Milli: (weakly) What are we talking about here?

A flashback to Jake singing, gazing at Milli...

Milli: Oh... (her eyes open wide)
Emma: I mean, I'm not totally clueless.
Milli: But... we're talking about Ziggy, right?
Emma: (blinks) No...
Milli: Oh. That's... erm... funny. Cos I got together with Ziggy that night.
Emma: Oh. (blinks) Um. I was right. Go me. (quickly adds) I mean, it's obvious he really likes you too. (smiles weakly)
Milli: (distantly) Yeah.

Emma: Anyway, you think I should go in? I mean, I'll help with research... if you want me to... but I dunno.
Milli: yeah. You should just go in and talk to everybody. It'll be fine.
Emma: Yeah, 'cause I've had so much luck with the talking today.

And they share a smile.

Emma: Thanks.
Milli: Hey. Don't mention it.

Ziggy strolls in.

Ziggy: Hello everybody!
Jack: Hi Doctor Nick...
Ziggy: Shut up. Now, I have bad news and bad news. According to my sister, something's going down connected to my family and my tattoo in the next few days.
Sunita: Oh. Excellent!
Ziggy: Um...
Sunita: Er, sorry, um, I mean, that narrows it down a great deal! We can eliminate about three shelves' worth of treatises. Did she give you a time and date, by any chance?
Ziggy: No...

Jake: So she just happened to bump into you?
Ziggy: Yeah. Mister Escher, I'm gonna need some books. Something about an alignment.
William: Alignment? Possibly connected to a comet in the next few days... I'm just going to call the Astronomical Society.

Milli looks in as Emma enters. She smiles weakly and waves to those who look up.

Emma: Um, hi... how is everyone? Are you all... okay?
Sunita: Oh, ah, yes. We're fine. Don't worry about that. Ah, Emma, maybe you can help us here.

Emma brightens, to the extent that she only looks really uncomfortable. As she approaches the central table, Jake gets up and reaches for his cigarettes...

Sunita: We're trying to find the significance of an empowering sigil tied to an astronomical event in the near future...
Emma: Right. (watches Jake go)
William: And here's a picture of Ziggy's back.
Emma: Riiiight... Okay, I haven't been in here in three days, so obviously I missed a lot.
Sunita: Milli and Ziggy are dating.
Emma: Yeah, I kinda stumbled onto that one myself. (smiles wanly)
Sunita: Ziggy, how long ago did you get this tattoo?
Ziggy: Not sure. I don't remember when I got it at all. Somebody told me I had it when I was... I think I was fourteen. I dunno...

Ziggy returns to reading. After a while he looks up, and gazes intently at the wall.

Ziggy: I found them.

Everyone looks over. Jake stubs out his smoke and comes back in.

Jake: So where are they? How specific are you?
Ziggy: Block, certainly. Possibly building. With a little luck I can get the floor.
Jake: Right. Let's go.
Ziggy: I'm thinking packing. Weapons, spells, everything. I'm gonna call Milli in.

Milli paces uncharacteristically anxiously as she talks.

Milli: How are you with holding spells?
Ziggy: Not bad.
Milli: So, strategy. We go in, we distract them, you cast a spell, put them in a box.
Ziggy: That might work on Thomas. Not on my father. If he's conscious.
Milli: So, I can knock him unconscious.
Ziggy: Maybe...

Sunita: Who else can we call? Surely the Council could send someone.
Margot: I don't think we're exactly popular right now.
Jake: There's always Wesley. (smirks)
Escher: Actually, he's in California trying to deal with the Slayers.
Jack: Slayers? I thought there was only one at a time.
Escher: Never mind...
Jack: So can we get one? Is Milli one now or -
Escher: I said never mind. (sighs)

Charlotte sits by William as he looks through a list of astronomical bodies in the library.

Charlotte: So... umm... what are you working on?
William: Er, a star chart.
Charlotte: Oh... can I ask why?
William: Er...
Charlotte: Well, I mean, you're spending a lot of time at the lab. As well as, y'know, with your society chums. That Milli girl and Ziggy and that couple and, um, umm... And I'm just wondering what you're... what you're doing.
William: Oh. Well, um...

Jake: So there are probably guards, to stop us getting to them quickly enough. Better...
Milli: Infinitely better.
Sunita: Why are we doing this?
Jake: We have to do this now.
Sunita: But if this conjunction is so important, surely all we have to do is hold out until it's all over?
Jake: Like we've been holding out till now?
Milli: They can come in and take him.
Jake: They tore through the shield Emma made...
Emma: Yeah...

Ziggy sighs.

Ziggy: We have one advantage. He doesn't think we're stupid enough to attack. But we are.
Milli: Yay us...
Ziggy: I mean, he won't guard against everything. He'll just keep his security close to him.
Jake: So get us close to him.
Ziggy: Then some old-fashioned slapping in the face.
Milli: I'm always up for slapping people in the face. Let's go slap someone in the face.

Ziggy looks across at Milli. Behind her determined expression she looks like she's struggling not to cry.

Milli: Okay. Bring me in. I'll die gloriously and horribly painfully. It'll be great.
Escher: Milli...
Milli: You all know it, I'm just the only one saying it!
Ziggy: Hey. We can take them.
Milli: The same way we could take Thomas? Have you met your family? We threw everything we had at him. We did nothing. Ziggy, all of us were there. And he laughed at us.
Ziggy: We weren't all there. We were on the defensive. There's no time for all this mopey whiny stuff.
Milli: Mopey whiny stuff... (angrily) I'm really sorry if all I can do is fire a crossbow uselessly! Excuse me if I wasn't born one of the greatest sorcerers in the world!
Ziggy: Wait, how is this about me?
Milli: It's all about you. You and us and how you're so far away from us, you might actually survive! We don't have that!
Ziggy: You have me. Even if you don't seem to grasp what that means. What we can do together is more than any of us can do alone.
Milli: What we can do...
Ziggy: I can get you close enough. You're the best fighter we have.

Milli shakes her head and speaks quietly, reflective.

Milli: I'm not saying I won't be there. Of course I'm going to be there, slap-bang in the middle of the fighting. But excuse me if I'm not overly optimistic.
Ziggy: The simple fact is -
Milli: The simple fact is our track record.
Ziggy: Yeah, well, not everything in life works your way. You can't just kick everything to get it to work for you.
Milli: Now you're agreeing with me.
Ziggy: (shouting) No! Get it through your thick skull! You're not alone in this!

Milli blinks in disbelief, closes her eyes and lowers her head.

Milli: Yes I am.

Ziggy throws up his hands in frustration and turns away. Mill looks up again and turns to Escher.

Milli: So, what's our plan?
Escher: Perhaps... we should take a break.

Milli shakes her head and heads outside.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

08-02-2004, 07:34 PM

Ziggy follows Milli outside. She picks up her pace.

Ziggy: Will you stop?
Milli: Why? What's there to talk about? You say we're going to win, I say... whatever.
Ziggy: I'm sorry.
Milli: All you did was call me thick... Don't worry, I'm used to it.

She turns on her heel and goes. The door ahead of her slams shut.

Milli: Oh, that's very big of you.
Ziggy: Like you're the one to talk. (pause) You're not walking away.
Milli: I think I am. Are you gonna cast a spell to stop me?
Ziggy: Milli... this is all my fault. I know that. If somebody should die, it's me.
Milli: Life doesn't work that way. It's gonna be someone that can't defend themselves the way you can, like William or Emma. Jack, Sunita or Margot, maybe even...
Ziggy: Hey, they all know what's going on.
Milli: ... They all know there's a really good chance we won't get out of this alive. You keep acting like we won't.
Ziggy: It's not set in stone. We might, sure...
Milli: Right. All you had to say...
Ziggy: Doesn't mean we will. I made a promise. I'm with you all the way.
Milli: Well, you can be here all the way but if we've only got a couple days left, then it's not much of a promise.

Ziggy lets her last comment sink in, then breathes in deeply and answers calmly.

Ziggy: Don't give up.
Milli: I'm not giving up. You know I'll fight to the end. I just know it is gonna be a fight to the end.
Ziggy: How are you so sure?
Milli: I just know.
Ziggy: It's the future. Nobody knows.
Milli: Some people do.
Ziggy: He doesn't.
Milli: No, actually, that's kind of his thing. I fight, you use magic, he sees the future. And I'm going to try and change it in such a way that none of us can be massacred by your family...
Ziggy: Well, I can always do it on my own, can't I?
Milli: You know I'll fight with you. All the way...
Ziggy: He's not some almighty figure.
Milli: You're the sorcerer. He's only worried about you.
Ziggy: You don't know what you can do against him.
Milli: We do, and we're going to do it. End of story. We have nothing else to talk about.
Ziggy: Apparently.

Sunita, meanwhile, looks up from a large tome of pictograms.

Sunita: Their power is linked to the alignment... the father's to the children's... We may have a chance... That may be the power balance.
Jake: What? He's pulling power from them?
Sunita: Have we ever seen Mister Roots use magic?
Emma: No...
Jake: Just Thomas. But he killed Skel bare-handed.
Sunita: Well, I don't believe he'd be totally powerless. But his power may be at its minimum ebb.
Jake: At the minimum ebb he killed Skel.

Ziggy stomps back in. Alone.

Sunita: I have some questions. About two years ago, did you experience any unusual manifestations of power?

Ziggy ignores her and stops next to Jake.

Ziggy: (to Jake) You don't see the future, dammit! (glances at Su) I dunno...
Jake: Never said I did.
Ziggy: Some people believe you do. Stupid visions!
Jake: Tell me about it. I don't want 'em. Believe me, it's not pretty.
Ziggy: She was all like "we're all gonna die". What the hell did you tell her?
Jake: (looks away) ... Doesn't matter.
Ziggy: Matters to me.
Jake: (looks back, eyes narrowed) Fine. I saw us all dying horribly.
Ziggy: Oh... Apparently I'm the only one that doesn't see this.

Sunita interrupts their mutual head-shaking.

Sunita: I've got a theory. Your family's boosted power is tied to this cosmic alignment event. There's a comet that comes every two years. It's nearest the Earth in two days' time. Now, your father's power may also be linked to yours. He may seek to drain your power... and his own may be at a low ebb. Your siblings may not be affected, though...
Ziggy: I can take care of Thomas.
Sunita: This may be our best chance to stop your family.
Ziggy: So, what do I have to do? (looks to Jake) And what did you see?

Jake gazes at the table as he speaks, never looking up.

Jake: every minute detail of everybody I care about dying.

Flashback to Jake's vision as he describes it.

Jake: I saw William impaled, Andy beaten down, Escher shot, Emma stabbed... I was about to cut my own head off... and I saw Milli stabbed by someone she thought was you. As you stood behind her, looking like you were ready to explode as you cast a spell...

He looks up.

Jake: Just a vision. Doesn't mean anything.
Ziggy: Well, that was... detailed?
William: Uh... two days, you say? Could we book a holiday to Australia by then? (smiles weakly)

Milli reaches the Brody, alone.

Milli: Can I get a double JD and Coke? Oh, and a cheese sandwich?
Tessa: Exam time or boy trouble?
Milli: (firmly) Exam time.

Ziggy: Why's everyone so bummed out?
Sunita: The vision of our imminent deaths and the "we're all going to die assaulting that house"...
Ziggy: Nothing serious, then?

Coming back, Milli finds Jake outside, smoking.

Milli: Are you okay?
Jake: Ziggy made me recount the vision I had.
Milli: Sorry. Might be my fault. I tried to talk to him, and...
Jake: I've been wrong before, y'know? And I have to be wrong this time.
Milli: Nah. I figure I'm going out in a blaze of glory.
Jake: No. I don't see that in you. (smiles gently) I can see you looking back at a long life.

Milli looks at him for a long time, a sad smile spreading across her face.

Milli: Really? Cos I think I'm gonna die young. Like my brother. Some families get super sorcery, some get to die early...

With that, she turns away from him and walks in...

Ziggy: So the biscuits are the female characters, and the jelly donuts are the dogs...

And walks out again.

Jake: That was a short visit.
Milli: Ziggy was being Ziggy.

Escher comes out to talk to them.

Milli: Hi...
Escher: Look... I know you're scared. I'm scared myself. I wouldn't admit it to everyone but I'm afraid we won't all be coming home. But we have a real chance to win.
Milli: We do?
Escher: We do.
Jake: Sunita found something?

Milli nods slightly, trying to appear convinced, and turns to head inside...

Jake: Milli?

Milli turns.

Jake: I got your back.

Milli pauses for a second, smiles warmly at him, and walks back into the office.

Sunita: William, check customs regarding tattooing and power sharing.
Ziggy: No, find maps for this building.
William: ... Okay.
Ziggy: While the rest of us -
William: Lay down our lives.
Ziggy: If you insist.

Milli: So. Are we actually coming up with a plan or are we describing TV shows with food?
Ziggy: Somebody has to keep spirits up.
Sunita: Due to our horrible situation...
Milli: See?
Sunita: Hmm, maybe I can acquire some sleeping gas...
Ziggy: Jake, front or back line?
Jake: What's the choice?
Ziggy: Fighting or fire support.
Milli: He's gonna be physically fighting. The only one casting spells is you.
Emma: Hey, I could...
Milli: We can't ask you to do that...

Emma nods slightly and leans back.

Ziggy: First of all, I'll cast a spell to find their foci. Magical artefacts and power objects. Find them and destroy them as soon as.
Sunita: Have we got anything like that?
Milli: Well, there's my sword... and the anti-barrier spell powder...
Emma: I might have one more thing.

She holds up the bag containing the dust of the Night Star crystal.

Milli: What'll it do?
Emma: We have enough to channel one spell through it. Of course we'll need someone to throw it.

She hands it to Milli without further comment. Milli nods and takes it.

Milli: How many of them are there, do we know? Just the three, or will there be guards?
Ziggy: Possibly another one, who won't be a threat...
Jake: If we have to take on guards that'll slow us down -
Ziggy: I'm going in first.
Milli: No, I'm going in first.
Ziggy: I can't focus everywhere.
Milli: They won't be in one place.
Ziggy: Yes they will, once I go in.

Sunita: What will Adelia's response be?
Ziggy: I don't know.
Milli: She hasn't done anything to harm us so far...

Adelia comes home... and finds her father waiting for her.

Benjamin: Well my dear, did you have a good time?

She nods, a little warily.

Benjamin: I'm so glad.

Thomas steps up behind her, arms folded...

Jake looks around the gathered group.

Jake: I'm going scouting.
Emma: Are you -
Ziggy: Can't you send Jack?
Jake: Yeah, send the noisy one that never notices anything.
Jack: Hey...
Milli: I'm going too.
Ziggy: So you guys are going in... Have you got the bracelet?
Milli: hm?
Ziggy: Milli... Mill, you okay?
Milli: Fine... Yeah, fine.
William: You should get some equipment too. Maybe something for listening?

And cut to Milli and Jake waiting outside the Society for Psychical Research as William leans in the door.

Michelle: So, lemme get this straight here, ya wanna borrow the Society for Psychical Research?
William: Not... all of it. Just your equipment. Your infrared cameras and laser microphones and...
Michelle: Right. Good. Okay. So could I ask what ya want t'do with it?

William: Uh... (whispered to Jake and Milli) What do I say?
Jake: (quietly) You need to pull an overnight study and this way you can get into the library all night...
Milli: (quietly) No, you're making a short film and you need props!
William: (leans back in) Er... we're investigating a sighting in one of the chapels.

Jake and Milli hold their breath...

Michelle: Oh, right. Sign 'ere, okay? Which one? Not the one at Trinity, 'cause we were there last month.
William: Uh... no... one of the... other ones.

By now it's starting to get dark. Ziggy's trail leads to a large, lightless house at the edge of the Shield with a For Sale sign hanging loose outside. No car in the drive...

Milli: Well, you're the guy with the super hearing... I'll back you up and keep watch.
Jake: Right.

He picks the lock, and the door opens onto darkness.

Milli: We should search. Do we split up?
Jake: NO.

Jake pulls on a pair of night vision goggles, then looks around as Milli steps onto the bare wooden floor of the house's spacious hall... her feet inching towards a circle of charcoal on the floor.

He grabs her and pulls her back.

Milli: What?
Jake: Um... let's run?
Milli: Um... why?
Jake: That.
Milli: Oh. What is it?
Jake: (flatly) Maybe you should ask your boyfriend, he'd know.

Milli recoils sharply at his tone, opens her mouth to say something and then thinks better of it.

Looking over, Jake sees something in the centre of the circle. Maybe a jacket?

Milli shines her torch over that way. Adelia's jacket.

Milli: Right, I'm going to smudge one of the symbols around the circle...

She puts her foot down on the charcoal. Then there's a flash in the air, like distant lightning.

Milli: Bugger. Okay, now we run!

The air thickens and darkens, and then the darkness flies towards them, screaming.

Jake: Yup, Now with the running thing!

Jake grabs Milli and pulls her outside, slamming the door with a kick. The dark slams into it, cracking it and nearly buckling it outwards, then starts to leak out through the windows. By this point, Milli and Jake are on their bikes and away...

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

08-02-2004, 07:35 PM

When they get back, they find Escher on the phone.

Escher: Right. Excellent. That will be very helpful. Goodbye. (hangs up)
Milli: What was that about?
Escher: Chase is sending me the coven's annotated files on the Roots family's spell use.
Jake: Chase, huh?
Escher: Yes... we were Prentices together, you know. I assume that's why Travers sent him specifically. He was at our wedding...
Milli: So do you trust him?
Escher: About as far as I can throw him.

He smiles wanly.

Escher: Now, what did you find?
Milli: There was nobody home.
Jake: Zig, how up to date was your spell?
Ziggy: I was aiming to track them, not where they'd been.
Jake: It was a trap.

Escher scowls. Emma looks concerned.

Milli: There was kind of a circle, and symbols and then I smudged one and it was like a cloud of darkness attacked us.
Ziggy: Might have been a guard rather than a trap...
William: Must have been scary.
Jake: Not really. Not that fast.
Milli: Would've been scarier if it'd been them.
Jake: And Adelia's jacket was in the circle too.
Escher: It may have been enchanted to redirect the spell. They could be anywhere.

The group shake their heads. Milli thumps the desk.

Jake: So if they can do that...
Milli: Is there any hope of finding them?
Escher: There's always hope. They're trying to avoid a direct confrontation.
Milli: It's cool. We can take 'em.

Ziggy gets up and goes. Milli considers following, but stays.

William: So you didn't get anything?
Jake: No, but thanks. Good goggles.
William: Surprising what you can see...

Ziggy enters the house. As he crosses the threshold, nothing happens. He finds a chair, sits in the circle and picks up the jacket. There's a symbol on the lining. Drawn in blood.

Sunita rubs her eyes, puts a marker in the book, and shuts it.

Sunita: I need something to eat.
Milli: I'll join you.

They sit talking over baked potatoes.

Sunita: So, our assault doesn't have anywhere to assault.
Milli: (half-smiles) Makes it harder, sure. But it's just more of a challenge.
Sunita: Maybe we should relocate as well... at least we have the barrier spell here. Not that it's been a lot of help in the past.
Milli: We can only guess it's helping now.
Sunita: What else is there to do?
Milli: See where Ziggy went. Check that house more thoroughly.
Sunita: And then what?

And we pan across to the clock showing it's almost nine. And a poster for the Mingle, starting at 9.30...

They head back and find William on his way out, fiddling with a bow tie.

William: I'll be late...
Sunita: Here, let me.
William: Thanks.
Milli: (to Sunita) Hey, you could go with Jake!
Sunita: Er... (quickly) we should check the house. We may find some solid evidence... and something to help Ziggy with his tracking spell.
Milli: Maybe, if he'd told us that we'd have looked... I know that when Skel tried to find us he used bits of hair and stuff.

So they duly arrive at the house with Su lugging a forensics kit.

William: How'd the door get smashed?
Milli: There was a demon. It chased us some.
William: Oh, okay then.

Sunita: Now, if you could put on these forensic clean jumpsuits...

Milli gives her a funny look and goes inside. And they switch on the lights to find Ziggy sitting in the circle, watching the door.

William: How long have you been here?
Ziggy: A while.
Milli: Hey...

She heads upstairs with no further comment.

Su looks at Adelia's jacket.

Sunita: Will this help you to track her?
Ziggy: Maybe... There's blood on it.
Sunita: Oh... (grimaces) Er, let me get a sample bag... Would it help if you had other samples?
Ziggy: It could.

Searching the rooms, Milli finds overnight bags for one woman and three men. Checking the sizes, she guess the third set, athletic clothes, would fit Ziggy.

Jake: Little brother?
Milli: Or clothes for Ziggy.

She throws a jogging top to him, and he has a clear image of a younger man bearing a close resemblance to Ziggy wearing it, nodding weakly as Thomas orders him to pack and go.

Jake: Your little brother's here too.

Ziggy shrugs and holds up Adelia's jacket.

Ziggy: So, this diverted my finding spell.
Jake: Could try again without the sigil.
Escher: Could try, yes.
Jake: Don't really feel like giving this up.

William looks at the time.

William: I really have to go.
Jake: Supposed to be somewhere?
William: About twenty minutes ago.
Jake: Oh, the Mingle's tonight?
William: Yeah. Bye.

With that, he dashes out.

Sunita: We should... I think we've got things to do here. And we shouldn't endanger civilians by going.
Jake: Come on... one last jig?

He looks to Milli. She looks away.

Jake: Well, I got a spare ticket.
Milli: I'm going to the office.
Emma: Me too.
Sunita: So am I.

Sunita, of course, is going there to camp out for the next three days, with supplies, changes of clothing and plenty of scones...

Charlotte pointedly looks at the clock as William rushes in. He gives her a lospided smile and she gives him a hard stare.

Jake watches Milli and Emma go in, turns and leaves. Milli goes to the window and watches him go, frowning.

And Ziggy stays in the house. A gun in his lap. Waiting.

CREDITS!
GRR! ARG!

Craig Oxbrow

08-02-2004, 07:37 PM

Next time on The Watch House:

Milli loading a second bag full of weapons.

Chase on the phone.

Chase: They're going to war.

Travers nodding to a squad of men in black fatigues.

Emma's hands shaking.

Milli: I'm not going to kill him.
Ziggy: Then he'll kill you.

Milli and Jake circling each other, swords drawn...

Escher V/O: The next episode of The Watch House is No Place To Hide.

--
DVD Commentary

Craig: Milli and Ziggy's first kiss could reasonably be described as awkward...
Cat: (laughs) I'd say short.

Craig: Wheee. That was really disheartening!
John: Well, I think we now understand just how outgunned we are.
Cat: It's the big traumatic "we're all gonna die" episode.

Craig: Funnily enough, during the session several of us felt terrible after a real-life Mingle-like activity, which means that most of the writing staff have now seen me in a kilt. And yet most of them are still talking to me, which is nice. There were a few jokes about body-swapping thanks to the outfit, of course...

Craig Oxbrow

08-10-2004, 05:47 PM

The Watch House 2.17: No Place To Hide

Milli: punkette angst-fuelled Watcher trainee
Ziggy: badass sorcerer and son of supervillain, genuinely concerned about Milli
Jake: psychic civilian currently feeling rather guilty and lost
Sunita: Watchers' Council very proper teaching assistant
William: Mister Watcher Trainee

(Absentee)
Andy: quiet unassuming hereditary lycanthrope, in control, oh yeah, you betcha
Jack: comes and goes like the wind

(NPC)
Escher: dour but fatherly Watchers' trainer
Emma: Jake's broken-hearted spellcasting ex
Margot: Watchers' Council fairly slapdash teaching assistant
Charlotte: William's unaware civilian girlfriend
Benjamin: Ziggy's father, ruthless warlock and businessman
Thomas: Ziggy's brother and Benjamin's right hand man
Adelia: Ziggy's sister, loyalty to her father seemingly less than 100%
Chase: Watchers' Council security

Previously on The Watch House:
Milli wielding the enchanted sword.

Milli: Seems to work.

Adelia approaching Andy, smiling as he backs away.

Milli and Ziggy kissing, rather awkwardly.

Jake and Emma looking away from each other.

Jake looking across at Milli...

Adelia looking around warily as she speaks to Ziggy.

Adelia: It's starting. The alignment. The time when our father can draw the most power from us... from all of us.

Sunita: Their power is linked to the alignment... the father's to the children's... We may have a chance... That may be the power balance... his power may be at its minimum ebb.
Jake: At the minimum ebb he killed Skel.

Roots killing Skel bare-handed.

William taking Charlotte to the Summer Mingle. They look great.

Jake: Can you find them?
Ziggy: I can try.

Milli setting off a magical trap in the house Ziggy targeted and being dragged outside by Jake as a living shadow chases after them.

Ziggy waiting in an empty house, holding his sister's jacket. And a gun.

Craig Oxbrow

08-10-2004, 05:51 PM

Morning comes. Milli gets up, and heads over to the couch where Emma insisted on sleeping, not feeling safe to go home alone. She sneaks into the kitchen to make a coffee without waking her, and sits on the step of the door to drink it, smoking a cigarette, looking anxious.

Sunita gets out of her sleeping bag, lying on the office floor. She wanders into the kitchen to wash up and make some tea.

Jake sits wide awake in bed. Andy lies face down on his, half snoring, half growling. Jack sleeps peacefully. Margot goes jogging. William gazes down at Charlotte, still asleep in his arms. Ziggy lies on top of the bed in his brother Julian's room, thinking.

And Escher fumbles with his shirt buttons as he answers a knock at his door, pausing to look through the spyhole... and pick a swordcane from the coat stand. Chase stands at the door, holding a briefcase.

Chase: Morning, old man. Files from the coven on the Roots family's magical style. Sign here... and here...
Escher: Anything useful in them?
Chase: Ms. Bartendale assures me it includes a way to circumvent that tracking counterspell.
Escher: Right. Good day.
Chase: Not going to ask me to stay for the grand finale?
Escher: Would you?
Chase: ... No. I don't suppose I would.

As he goes, Escher shoves the door shut and goes to read over the files. And Chase takes out his phone.

Chase: They're going to war. Prepare the emergency response.

And on the other end of the line, Travers nods to a group of men in black fatigues. They nod back and start gathering weapons...

CREDITS!

Craig Oxbrow

08-10-2004, 05:53 PM

Milli tiptoes out and heads towards the practice room, via the office.

Charlotte wakes as William moves to get up.

Charlotte: Hi... (sleepy smile)
William: Hi... Do you want some coffee?
Charlotte: Breakfast in bed? Sure... So, what are we doing today?
William: What do you want to do?

Ziggy wanders the rooms of his father's house, then leaves.

Jake rubs his eyes as he heads over to the office.

Milli finds Sunita in the practice room.

Sunita: Oh. I was just...
Milli: Practising?
Sunita: Rusty.
Milli: You don't need to explain it to me. I'm the queen of extraneous practising.
Sunita: Well, um, do you need a sparring partner?
Milli: Choose your weapon.
Sunita: Sword? Try a sword.
Milli: Do you have a sword?
Sunita: Well, no.

Jake looks in at the office. He finds Escher there already, working through the file.

Jake: Where is everyone? It's... eight-thirty... but there's usually someone else around.
Escher: Milli pushed a note under the door. She's in the practice room.
Jake: Right. I could do with a sweat myself.

Sunita: Stakes?
Milli: Not really the right weapon for this.
Sunita: Axes?
Milli: Okay.

They square off as Jake steps in the door, pauses and observes. Milli charges too soon, oversteps and Sunita shoves her off her feet. Jake applauds. The women look over.

Jake: Sorry, didn't mean to interrupt.

Milli sets her axe down and heads back to the office, past Jake. He follows along.

Jake: How are you?
Milli: Fine.
Jake: Oh. Sure?

She doesn't answer as she carries on to the office.

Escher: Ah. Feel better?
Milli: Not really. What are you looking at?
Escher: A file from the Council, containing the coven's findings on the family's spellcraft.
Milli: Anything in it?
Escher: A way through the anti-tracking spell and an analysis of their barrier magics.
Milli: Anything more... offensive than counter-defensive?
Escher: Not so far, but it does confirm Miss Chadha's suspicions about the connection between the family members' power levels.
Milli: That's something... I suppose we should gather the troops. I'll call Emma.
Jake: Surely we can work out something between us?

Mill ignores him and makes the call as Sunita comes in, having dutifully stored the weapons.

Milli: Hi, um, sorry to wake you.
Emma: Yeah, you were out early...
Milli: I needed to practice. Anyway, we've got something about the Roots shield spells. Come over.
Emma: Who else is around?
Milli: Mister Escher, Sunita... Margot I think...
Emma: I was just thinking you should call Ziggy.
Milli: Yeah. Okay. See you soon.

Jake: She's coming?
Milli: Yeah.
Jake: ... Cool.
Milli: I didn't tell her you were here, so pretend you only just got here.
Jake: What? Why?
Milli: She asked who was here, she was all funny about it...
Jake: So I should go.
Milli: No, she's gotta get over it.
Jake: No, if she's all pissed, I can leave.
Sunita: Yes. That may be best...
Jake: Fine. I'll go find Ziggy.
Ziggy: (flatly) Why?

As he steps in.

Jake: Or not. Hi.

Ziggy nods and sits down, his appearance sullen.

Jake: Apparently we've got files.
Milli: Statistics for the family's shields. We need to find a way to break them.
Jake: So, Emma's coming over...
Milli: We could do with all hands on deck.
Jake: I'll just be a hindrance.
Milli: Don't worry, Ziggy's here now, he knows what he wants us to do.
Jake: Still...
Milli: (flatly) If you wanna leave, leave.
Jake: (sighs) No, it's fine...

Mill shakes her head and calls William.

Milli: Hi, how's it going? We have files we have to look through. So what are you up to?
William: Uh... that's good.
Milli: Are you busy?
William: Oh, someone's over here.
Milli: Someone's over there - oh really? (grins)
William: Ye-ess...
Milli: Tell her I said hi, and we'll catch you in... ummm...?
William: Some time soon.
Milli: See ya...

She hangs up and stares at the phone, nearly giggling.

Milli: Oh my Gawwd. William's... busy.
Jake: So he's in the library?
Milli: Yes. Studying Charl - with Charlotte.
Jake: Little William? (grins) That's just... rude.
Milli: Studying, not rude, in, uh, private.
Jake: (smirks) Good for him.
Milli: (flustered) Good to have a... study partner.
Jake: I wouldn't know... er...

Ziggy breaks the silence rather loudly.

Ziggy: SO... we're looking for what, exactly?
Jake: Ways to break the shields.
Milli: Unless you wanted to boost them.

Ziggy and Milli share a look. He smiles bitterly.

Emma arrives, oblivious to this. She hands Milli a bag Her hands are shaking...

Emma: It's the powder to cut through barrier spells.
Milli: You okay?
Emma: No. It's, y'know... this could be it. Stage fright. Well, that and imminent painful death fright...

She smiles weakly, glancing sidelong at Jake. He tries to look reassuring.

Jake: Don't worry...

William shrugs on a T-shirt. Charlotte looks over from the bed.

William: Uh, I have to go...
Charlotte: What? Now? You always have to go... What is this?
William: It's, uh, something at the lab.
Charlotte: But... I wanted to have the whole day with you... we haven't done that in weeks, and now...
William: I know. I'll try to keep it short.
He heads out, looking troubled.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

08-10-2004, 05:54 PM

Meanwhile, Ziggy looks through the coven's report and nods.

Jake: So, we can use the spell to stop the spell that stops the spell?
Ziggy: (counts on his fingers) Yeah.
Jake: Good.
Milli: Anything you can teach us?
Ziggy: Dodging?

William arrives as Milli starts to glare at Zig. Her expression brightens immediately as she grins at him.

Milli: Good morning!
Jake: You've got kind of a... spring in your step this morning.
William: It's a beautiful day...
Sunita: Ah! Yes it is! Now, we have these files...
Jake: Why are your cheeks so red?
Ziggy: He rushed over.
William: Yes... I slept in...
Milli: But I thought you were studying for that exam.
Jake: The oral one.

Milli splutters into her coffee. Emma looks up from the file she's reading and nods as she catches up with the topic. William goes redder and looks at his shoes. He's almost relieved when Ziggy gets up and stomps towards the door.

Milli: Where are you going?
Ziggy: Pub.
Milli: Not gonna stay and -
Ziggy: No.
Milli: But this is your chosen specialist subject...
Ziggy: Yeah.
Milli: We need your help.

Ziggy stops and rounds on Milli.

Ziggy: I remember you making it abundantly clear I couldn't help.
Milli: You can help...
Ziggy: I'm gonna get drunk.

Sunita steps up.

Sunita: But you have to stay.
Ziggy: I don't have to read the report. I know what it says. It says my family can kill anyone they like.
Milli: And you don't care?
Ziggy: (angrily sarcastic) Yeah, exactly. That's it! I don't care about any of you! That's why I'm going!
Sunita: Fine, then. But we're in danger because of you. You have to read this.
Ziggy: We done?
Sunita: No. There are more files.
Ziggy: There's a Guinness somewhere with my name on it.

He storms out. Milli follows. He doesn't speed up and lets her catch him.

Milli: I definitely can't persuade you?
Ziggy: Look, I tried my best yesterday. You saw how much that didn't help.
Milli: So you're pissed off because you messed up?... But it was really helpful.
Ziggy: No. I'm seeing everyone I know planning to die for something that was on me. Dying for me.
Milli: We're not planning on dying. We're just not all sunny about this.
Ziggy: There's no point going in at all, if you're just "gonna die".
Milli: We're not giving up.
Ziggy: I'm gonna do what I have to. You're gonna do what you have to. I doubt anything I can tell you will make any difference.
Milli: (angrily) Okay. Fine. We'll just get through it without you.
Ziggy: No. You won't.
Milli: What I'll remember.

Ziggy rolls his eyes.

Ziggy: I've never been inclined to sit around a bunch whiners.
Milli: We're not whining. We're aware of the danger.
Ziggy: Look, it's my fault, I don't wanna sit there with you all thinking "we're gonna die for this sucker".
Milli: Nobody does. I don't.
Ziggy: Must have changed your mind then.
Milli: No. It's not just about you. We're a team. We're gonna stand by you. And it would really help if you stand by us, instead of going to the pub. Stand up, smile, I don't care!
Ziggy: I do.
Milli: C'mon, sit down. Eat donuts. Throw balls of paper. Cheer us up! Do what you do...
Ziggy: (sighs) I'll come by later today to take care of the spell. I need to take care of something.
Milli: (quietly) Fine.

And they go their separate ways. Milli walks back into the office, head bowed.

Jake: Didn't work then?
Milli: He said he'd be back in a while...
Jake: Why? Got to see a man about a dog?

Milli says nothing. Jake turns to Emma, trying to sound encouraging.

Jake: Can you do something with the info?
Emma: Maybe...
Jake: But you don't sound very confident.
Emma: This is my not confident face. You may have seen it before. But, anyway, I can gear the anti-shield powder to their specific spells now.
Jake: Good... How did the Council get this?
Emma: It's from the coven.
Jake: So they outsource their magical know how?
Emma: Pays for a quality service.
Sunita: The Council's bureaucracy is not conducive to magical aptitude.
Milli: Anything for me to... oh, probably not.

She goes back to the practice room. Jake follows.

Jake: So you have this thing breaks their shields?
Milli: Yeah. Wanna practice? Swords would probably be good. How are you with a sword?
Jake: Not bad.

They circle each other, swords drawn, then Milli charges and Jake parries, putting her on the defensive, and shoves her back lightly.

Milli: (furiously) Don't DO that! You think they're gonna pull their punches?

She spins and kicks his legs out from under him.

Jake: Okay, point taken...
Milli: There's no point in practising at all if you're gonna do that.
Jake: Heart's not in it...

Milli jumps imperceptibly. He gets up shakily. She goes to get her crossbow. She fires off three rounds in quick succession, none of them quite hitting the bullseye on the target. She scowls.

Milli: Damn it.
Jake: Those were three excellent shots.
Milli: This is why I'm practising more. This isn't good enough.
Jake: They were all on target. They don't have to be heart-sized, just body-sized. And it only takes one to hit right. And I know you can do that.
Milli: Eeuchh. Go back to swords. I'm usually better there.

She sets down the crossbow and retakes the sword, then lunges at Jake. He parries and pushes her back.

Jake: See, you telegraphed it with the way you moved your feet...

WHAM! She shoulder-barges him to the ground.

Milli: So I take it you didn't see that one.
Jake: Uh... I was distracted.
Milli: Well, could we please try and focus on what we're doing here? This is important.

Jake nods as he gets up, charges forwards and pins her to the wall.

Jake: Good enough for you?

Milli inhales sharply, and nods nervously at the closeness of his face.

Jake: Doesn't prove anything, you know.
Milli: I know. We're not fighting by rules. We're trying to win.

Ziggy leans in the door and watches them in silence...

By this point they're both sweating lightly as they spar. Milli jabs Jake in the shin with a toe.

Jake: Are we kicking now?
Milli: We could...

With that, Milli whips around in a reverse spinning kick and floors him.

William looks in as Jake gets to his feet and Milli pins his arms.

William: So who's winning?
Ziggy: (quietly) I think she is.
Milli: I think I am.
Jake: I could get out of this...

He blows in her ear. She blinks and jumps. He smirks as he slides out of her grip.

Jake: Don't get distracted.
Milli: Don't distract me. They won't be able to.

She throws Jake over her shoulder and lands deftly on him, pinning him to the ground. She looks down at his face and quickly turns towards William.

Milli: So anyway, what's the story with you and Charlotte? Going well?

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

08-10-2004, 05:56 PM

Milli is lying on Jake, pinning him to the ground and grinning at William.

Milli: So anyway, what's the story with you and Charlotte? Going well?
William: Yeah... (smiles)
Jake: Got her where you... ow...
William: Got him where Ziggy...?
Ziggy: Well, somebody sure got someone. Details are a bit fuzzy though.

Milli takes her foot off Jake's chest and jumps up, blushing deeply and looking incredibly guilty.

Milli: Well, yeah, we were practising. The object is to defeat your opponent. Yeah, um... hi. You're back. Cool.
Ziggy: Yeah.
Jake: I'm gonna get a shower...
Ziggy: You're walking on thin ice, man. Thin ice.

Jake looks at Ziggy, but says nothing, and continues to the shower room.

Ziggy watches him leave from the corner of his eye.

Milli: So, how's it going?
William: We're still looking. No major developments in... the last ten minutes...
Milli: How does Mister Escher feel about it?
Ziggy: He can feel?
Milli: Don't be like that, Ziggy. (pauses) So, are you gonna help? Did you maybe bring donuts?
Ziggy: Shop was closed.
Milli: Shame. Gonna hit the showers. See you over there.

Reaching the shower, she finds Jake already lacing up his boots outside.

Jake: So. How's it going?
Milli: I dunno. Kinda, um... Not so shouty. Now just more... sullen. But... he'll be fine. We'll be fine.
Jake: Like you mean it...
Milli: We will be. He wants to be, and I don't want to lose him - he's one of my closest friends...

As they return to the office, Ziggy stands waiting.

Escher: Ziggy. The floor is yours.
Ziggy: Now, I can equip you all with a single deflection spell. Nobody will be expecting it, so they won't look for it.
Milli: That's really cool. But there's no point getting close to them if we can't do anything to them.
Ziggy: If I start messing with shields...
Emma: I thought we took them off with the... y'know.
Escher: The Council's data.
Ziggy: Yeah. Probably. Now, as for tracking, it'll be more reliable with something of theirs. We have Adelia's jacket.
Milli: I don't really see her as a threat. But, did we get any hair when we looked around the house?
Sunita: Yes.
Milli: That's good. See! I'm optimistic!

She nods and grins enthusiastically. Ziggy almost smiles as he continues:

Ziggy: I'll cast a spell to find their magical foci. If something starts glowing with a yellowish light -
Milli: Smash it. I can do that. Good at that.
Ziggy: Milli, you're going to have to take care of Thomas.
Milli: ... I know.
Ziggy: My father at least hesitates to kill. Thomas doesn't.
Milli: How do we fight him?
Ziggy: Keep going, whatever he does. Whatever he says, don't listen.
Milli: See, this is helping. This is really helping. I wouldn't even have thought of that.

Sunita unlocks the weapons closet and takes out a hand axe. Escher raises an eyebrow.

Milli: Weaknesses?
Ziggy: He's really arrogant.
Milli: Right...
Ziggy: If he thinks you're weak he might start with the gloating. So fake being weak. Helpless.
Milli: Being weak and helpless…that's not my strong suit.
Ziggy: Can you look shaky?
Emma: Maybe I should fight him... (grins) Er... sorry.
Milli: I can do that anyway.
Ziggy: And when he fights he doesn't move much. He won't change his position, he'll just use his TK to change yours.
Milli: Right.
Ziggy: And another thing. If you get a chance... don't hesitate.

Milli blinks, and frowns slowly.

Milli: ... I'm not going to kill him.
Ziggy: Then he'll kill you.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

08-10-2004, 05:56 PM

Ziggy: He can hurt you in so many ways. His voice, his hands...
Milli: So I have to take all those ways from him to stop him.
Ziggy: And possibly consciousness as well.

Milli nods.

Jake: And your dad?
Escher: Yes, how do we fight him?
Ziggy: I'm going to take him on.
Milli: Only one that can.
Ziggy: Might help if someone helps though. Emma, are you going in?
Emma: (nervously) ... Yes?
Ziggy: You can help.
Jake: You don't have to.
Emma: No, no... I will.
Ziggy: Jake, help Milli with Thomas.
Jake: Ranged attacks good?
Ziggy: ... Yeah.

Ziggy: Adelia and Julian, I don't expect problems. At most, they'll annoy you with fireworks. I dunno about Adelia... But don't take any chances. If she looks at you funny...
Milli: I've been looking for an excuse to knock her out.
Andy: I can deal with her.

Andy walks into the office. Milli looks at him questioningly. He gazes back with a placid smile...

Ziggy: ... Right.

William heads back to the weapons closet. Escher stands.

Escher: Well. That's the plan. Now, how do we find them?
Sunita: The tracking spell, now we can get through their interference?

Ziggy shakes his head and takes out his mobile phone.

Ziggy: I'm calling my brother.
Escher: Not the way I expected...
Ziggy: He wants me there... (into the phone) Hey there, you ugly git!

Across the city, Thomas scowls as he answers.

Thomas: Something you wanted?
Ziggy: Yeah, I'm gonna order a pizza and I thought you could pay for it.
Thomas: Of course we can. Have it sent to this address...

Ziggy scribbles down an address as he hangs up.

Milli: He just... told you where he was?
Jake: And not where he wants you to be?
Ziggy: We'll have to find out.

To Be Continued
GRR! ARG!

Craig Oxbrow

08-10-2004, 05:58 PM

Escher V/O: Next time, on The Watch House:

Music: Ash, Starcrossed
Download a live version free here (http://downloads.7digitalmedia.com/downloads/star/default.asp?partner=4).

In your eyes I would hide, by your side I could defy the forces tearing us apart...

Milli drawing her sword.

But reality, as it seems, looking back is that our dream, was fading from the start...

Adelia holding her brother Julian close, in tears.

Girl, we're starcrossed and can't escape
We're condemned and can only wait...

Jake on his knees, burying his face in his hands...

At this time now it's far too late
To save us from our fate...

Ziggy clenching his fists, gritting his teeth, eyes jet black, lightning crackling around his fists.

You can't save us... you can't save us...

Thomas punching Escher across a room.

The camera spinning around Milli and Thomas locking swords.

It's true... you know that I'd die for you...

Emma screaming.

You know that I'd die for you...

Milli, bleeding from a cut on the forehead, struggling to her feet...

Escher V/O: The season ends with Starcrossed.

--
DVD Commentary:

(William and Charlotte in the intro)
Cat: Oooo-oo-ooh! Guess that answers that question!
(Milli and Jake square off)
Craig: This is my favourite fight scene of the entire season.

(Milli tells Jake off for pulling his punches)
Joe: "Hey everybody, Morpheus is fighting Neo!"
Craig: "Come on! Stop trying to hit me and hit me!"
Cat: Okay! (WHAM)
Craig: Ow...!

morgue

08-11-2004, 12:26 PM

I want to read the end!

I don't want it to end!

I want to read the end!

I don't want it to end!

etc.

Craig Oxbrow

08-11-2004, 01:12 PM

:D

Basically, yeah...

colbabe

08-11-2004, 07:30 PM

Is it just me, or did anyone else notice Milli's demeanour change immediately when she sparred with Jake? About time too - I was just beginning to think, "Oh, for God's sake Milli, get over it, you're boring us with your relationship angst." Then again, teens are a crazy crazy bunch, aren't they?

Ta also for the Ash tracks. It's good to have a soundtrack while reading this.

Craig Oxbrow

08-11-2004, 08:27 PM

colbabe

08-11-2004, 10:01 PM

Fair. Thinking back, I didn't really get over relationship angst until I was 28. Don't worry about me complaining - I'm just procrastinating when I should be searching my scalp for gray hairs.

Oh yeah, and with an ep name like Starcrossed, I'm expecting a season end of Shakespearean proportions. Go on, I dare you to cry "Havoc".

Coffee_Lifeform

08-12-2004, 04:08 PM

There was always supposed to be an obvious contrast between how Milli was around Jake and how she was around other people...but she is intrinsically an angst-ridden character.

As Ziggy takes great pleasure in pointing out, she kicks things and she mopes - that's her thang. :D

Craig Oxbrow

08-12-2004, 04:16 PM

And we love her for it. :)

Oh yeah, and with an ep name like Starcrossed, I'm expecting a season end of Shakespearean proportions. Go on, I dare you to cry "Havoc".
Wait and see...

thenewgirl

08-12-2004, 08:31 PM

Excellent. So very excellent.

I can't wait to see how the season ends!
:D

Craig Oxbrow

08-12-2004, 08:34 PM

We really better finish editing that climactic scene one of these days. :D

SteveD

08-13-2004, 12:55 AM

I've read Starcrossed, and it's not just Shakespearean but Biblical and series-end Farscapian as well. DAMN.

You have been warned.

Craig Oxbrow

10-07-2004, 10:36 PM

But since I'm here...

The Watch House Season 3

Music: Everclear, The Swing

Jake kicking a seven-foot demonic thing in the face.
William meeting a vampire mid-charge and skewering it with a taser.
Andy picking up a vampire by the collar and throwing it across the room.
Emma making a "stop!" gesture and three charging demons flying backwards away from her.
Someone shoulder-barging an animated skeleton to pieces.
Escher glaring at Chase.

Chase: There's no denying they're enthusiastic. But is this really the sort of example we want to set for the new freshman intake?

Two rather confused young people standing behind the group as they prepare to meet a charge of demon warriors.

Charlotte being grabbed and picked up by a big burly vampire, people lying on the green in the sunlight, a masque ball, the group pausing and watching two hordes of armoured demons fighting each other...

Luna smacking Andy on the back of the head, Sunita grimacing as she opens a body bag, Jake wiping blood off his lip, Andy growling, William looking rather nervous as he hefts his axe while a man with a lance rides at him on a motorbike...

Victoria Valdermar smiling sweetly...

Victoria: Hello, boys and girls. It's so good to be back.
A familiar voice: Yes it is...

Escher V/O: The Watch House returns this summer.

Zeiram

10-08-2004, 07:10 AM

(GRR!) ARG! Congrats on your 10,000th post, but you're such a tease! :p

Craig Oxbrow

02-22-2005, 07:34 PM

The Watch House 2.18: Starcrossed

Milli: punkette angst-fuelled Watcher trainee
Ziggy: badass sorcerer and son of supervillain, genuinely concerned about Milli
Jake: psychic civilian currently feeling rather guilty and lost
Sunita: Watchers' Council very proper teaching assistant
William: Mister Watcher Trainee

(Absentee)
Andy: quiet unassuming hereditary lycanthrope, in control, oh yeah, you betcha (player absent because this was run during exam time)
Jack: comes and goes like the wind

(NPC)
Escher: dour but fatherly Watchers' trainer
Emma: Jake's broken-hearted spellcasting ex
Margot: Watchers' Council fairly slapdash teaching assistant
Charlotte: William's unaware civilian girlfriend
Benjamin: Ziggy's father, ruthless warlock and businessman
Thomas: Ziggy's brother and Benjamin's right hand man
Adelia: Ziggy's sister, loyalty to her father seemingly less than 100%
Julian: Ziggy's younger brother, apparently an unwilling participant

Previously on The Watch House:

Skel fighting off the entire group as their weapons bounce off his magical shielding.

Milli wielding her enchanted sword, cutting through a mystical barrier.

Milli shattering the Night Star crystal in Thomas's hand. Emma handing her the bag containing the remnants of it.

Emma: We have enough to channel one spell through it. Of course we'll need someone to throw it.

Ziggy explaining Milli's bracelet:

Ziggy: It's enchanted so that when it breaks, you have a few minutes... three at most... to escape.

Jake: I had a vision...

Images of William dead, Andy beaten, Escher shot, Jake about to cut his own head off, Milli gasping "you're not Ziggy" as someone stabs her, and Ziggy about to let rip with a spell that could kill him as well as the target...

Everyone looking understandably nervous as Jake explains this...

Sunita: Their power is linked to the alignment... the father's to the children's... We may have a chance... That may be the power balance... his power may be at its minimum ebb.
Jake: At the minimum ebb he killed Skel.

Benjamin Roots killing Skel bare-handed.

Ziggy briefing the group on his family's abilities.

Ziggy: Milli, you're going to have to take care of Thomas... And if you get a chance... don't hesitate.
Milli: ... I'm not going to kill him.
Ziggy: Then he'll kill you.

Ziggy calling Thomas.

Milli: He just... told you where he was?
Jake: And not where he wants you to be?
Ziggy: We'll have to find out.

Craig Oxbrow

02-22-2005, 07:38 PM

We open on the group in the office, dressed in their patrolling gear, gathering weapons and equipment. Margot shifts her weight from foot to foot, trying not to look nervous. Then she answers her phone as it rings...

Margot: Hello? (grins) Hello! How are you?... (looks concerned) Oh... Um, well I kind of... no, no, it is really important... what? Oh, oh God... I'll... I'll be there soon.

She looks up as she closes her phone.

Margot: It's my mother. I have to go.
Milli: What?

Sunita follows Margot out.

Sunita: Do you really think there's a problem at home?
Margot: I don't know! But... if there is...
Sunita: And if there isn't?
Margot: Then it's my family getting me out of this.
Sunita: And I can't say that I blame them...
Margot: Yeah... Good luck.
Sunita: Thanks.

Su heads back in, shoulders slumped.

Sunita: (quietly) Well, at least there'll be someone to go to our funerals...
Ziggy: Oh, that's very uplifting.
Sunita: That's your job.

Escher: So, is this everyone?
William: Maybe we should call Jack... at least to let him know we might not be around.
Sunita: Tell him to come and bring big heavy things.
Jake: He'll bring his hi-fi.
Emma: And his ego...

The two of them smile slightly at one another's jokes. After calling Jack, William looks at his phone.

William: I should call Charlotte...
Ziggy: You're supposed to push those buttons.
William: I know, but... she doesn't know I'm going off to fight evil. What do I say?
Ziggy: (thinks) What's your favourite dish?
William: Huh? I dunno...
Ziggy: Tell her you'll be back later, and you want to go out for your favourite kind of food. Then when you get back you'll have your fave waiting for you.
Jake: ... Or she'll never be able to eat it again because it'll remind her of the day you died.
Emma: (hissing) Jake...
Ziggy: Sounds like win-win to me...

William shakes his head and makes the call.

Charlotte: Hi! Are you about done?
William: Uh, no. There was... an accident in the chem lab. It's okay though, nobody was hurt...
Charlotte: Oh, should I come over?
William: No, no, it's probably not safe...
Charlotte: Are you sure?
William: Yeah. I'll be a while... I love you.
Charlotte: I love you.
William: I'll see you soon. Bye.
Charlotte: Bye...
William: Bye...
Charlotte: Bye...
William: Gonna hang up...
Charlotte: Me too... Bye...
William: Bye...

CREDITS!

Craig Oxbrow

02-22-2005, 07:38 PM

Jake looks over the group.

Jake: So this is the bit where we spend our last moments how we want... I think we should go to the Brody for a drink.
Sunita: One last drink?
Jake: NO. Just a drink.
Milli: That's a really good idea.
Sunita: I need to make a call first...

Sunita: Father? I thought you might appreciate a status report. We're about to face the warlock family.
Mr. Chadha: I see.
Sunita: I was able to find forensic evidence which may have helped in tracking them down.
Mr. Chadha: Very good. And Sunita?
Sunita: Yes, father?
Mr. Chadha: Come home alive.
Sunita: I'll try. Thank you, father.

Emma: Milli? You want to phone someone?
Milli: (thinks for a second) Pretty much no-one to phone. Everyone I'd call's already here.
Emma: But...
Milli: If my parents find out, they find out.

Jack: So, what are we doing?
Sunita: We're going into battle with Ziggy's family.
Jack: Right then.

Ziggy: If everyone's ready? This spell should block their targeting.

He raises a hand, and a ball of pale while light floats above it and lets out thin lines that streak out to touch each of the group, momentarily lighting them up...

This done, the group head over to the Brody. Elvis Costello's All This Useless Beauty plays in the background, almost unnoticed.

Ziggy: I'll get a round.
Emma: Oh God, we're doomed...

She almost manages to smile.

Ziggy: This is like the third time I've bought a round.
Milli: When was the first? And the second?
Jake: When we were all asleep?
Milli: No, actually, we didn't raid the bar.
Escher: Hm. This booth's quite comfortable. A toast?
Milli: Definitely...
Jake: To the future.

Ziggy doesn't join the toast.

Milli: (To Ziggy) Please don't be like that. Not now.
Ziggy: I'll get some crisps...

He heads back to the bar and beckons Tessa over.

Ziggy: Eight drinks. One hour. Cold.
Tessa: Sure. You guys off to do something?
Ziggy: Yeah. Something.

The house is a large Georgian manor some way beyond the city limits. Three Mercedes outside. Stones lining the driveway with symbols painted on them... in blood.

Ziggy: Everybody turn their phones off.
Jake: Yeah, good idea.

This done, Ziggy goes over and keys the cars.

Jake: Oh, that's mature.
Ziggy: Look at it this way. If they get past us he'll still go "he got me!" Isn't that comforting?
Milli: No, really not at all...

Jack gets a bag of sugar out of his car's boot.

Jack: I'm gonna kill their engines.
Ziggy: Just remember, no sugar in your car.

Ignoring Jack's "well duh" expression, Ziggy heads over to the door, raises a hand...

Adelia paces around her room, scowling. Julian sits on a chair by her head, tracking her with his half-closed eyes.

Adelia: We'll get out of this.
Julian: Mm.
Adelia: We will.
Julian: Mm.
Adelia: I know you can understan' me. I won't let them harm you.
Julian: Mm.

She turns and kneels in front of him, looking into his eyes.

Adelia: (insistently) It'll be okay.
Julian: ... Deel?

She smiles weakly and puts her arms around him, starting to cry. Then she turns as there's a loud crash from downstairs...

As Ziggy lowers his hand and steps towards the blasted ruin of the door.

Jake: Using the subtle way, are we?
Ziggy: You wait outside.
Milli: We're not waiting.
Ziggy: I'll signal you.
Jake: We can go round the back.

Escher shakes his head. Milli hugs Ziggy, then watches as he heads inside.

Ziggy: Heeeeere's ZIGGY!
Benjamin: Welcome home...

Ziggy looks across the grand hall, up the double staircase to the balcony, where his father smiles placidly.

Everyone else heads around the house.

Jake: People gotta be lurking by the door... ladies first?

Milli goes to the door and then turns to face the group, her expression serious.

Milli: Guys, do me a favour? Be careful. Please.

They head inside. No sign of anyone around.

Jake: Oh yeah, for the record, my middle name's Pablo.
Milli: Pablo?
Jake: My mother's Spanish. You can see why I didn't tell you.
Milli: (smiles weakly) Well, at least I know now.

Benjamin: So, what brings you home at this late hour?
Ziggy: Thought I'd like a pizza...
Benjamin: This is your grand plan? I thought I had taught you better.
Ziggy: Quite a party-pooper aren't you? Speaking of plans... what's yours supposed to be? Standing on a balcony? Sheesh... I thought I had taught you better...

Benjamin's black eyes narrow as he smirks. Ziggy, meanwhile, looks away.

And Milli looks up as she hears his voice in her mind. She looks around and everyone else has a startled expression too...

Ziggy V/O: I'm with my dad, and Thomas isn't around.

And just then, a side door opens and Ziggy looks out...

"Ziggy": Come on, this way! I've found Adelia and Julian!
Milli: Right...

And "Ziggy" holds the door open, keeping one hand out of sight... holding a ritual dagger.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

02-22-2005, 07:39 PM

Jake steps up to "Ziggy". The figure looks at him, then back to Milli, beckoning insistently.

"Ziggy": Come on!

Milli steps closer, then elbows the door. "Ziggy" brings the knife out and she catches his wrist, holding the knifepoint an inch from her skin. The image of Ziggy shatters and Thomas grins, then pushes. Milli backs up, pointing to her bag with her other hand. Sunita fires her crossbow, and the bolts stops in mid air. Thomas takes a moment to look at, then at her, and it rotates towards her...

Jake opens Milli's bag and Emma retrieves the bag of powder, handing it to him. He opens it and showers Thomas with it. White light flickers and fades around him. And then Milli shoves the pommel of the dagger into his stomach. He wheezes and falls to his knees.

Emma: Seems to work.
Milli: Yup!
Jake: Kinda stings, doesn't it?

William opens his gym bag and pulls out a large contraption that looks like a cattle prod combined with a fire hose. He checks the battery reading... then clubs Thomas with it.

As Jake pins the downed Thomas to the floor, Benjamin pauses slightly as he descends the stairs.

Ziggy: What? Left the heating on?
Benjamin: Hmm.
Ziggy: Maybe I did have a plan...

A spinning kick from Milli and Thomas is out for the count. Sunita brings some rope out of her bag. William retrieves a roll of duct tape from his.

Benjamin: It seems that your friends hope to stifle my plans.
Ziggy: Dude, that's like all lyrical and stuff.

Milli: I'm gonna find Adelia. Let's try upstairs.
Jake: Right.
William: Should we search too?
Milli: No, you stay here and watch him. Somebody has to make sure he doesn't wake up.

Benjamin stands before Ziggy, fingers steepled. He regards his son thoughtfully.

Benjamin: And so, here you are, betrayer of the bond of family.
Ziggy: Your family bonds lead you to leave Thomas to my friends...
Benjamin: He is in no real danger. Your friends are good people.
Ziggy: Not all of them.

Milli and Jake reach the servants' quarters just as the doors are shut and locked from the other side.

Milli: Who is it?
Servant: We don't want any trouble!
Milli: Fine! Just get the hell out of here!
Servant: Okay... back away from the door, please...

The door opens a crack, then a butler, chauffeur and cook run out and away. Milli and Jake carry on up into the attic, which is locked from the outside. Jake starts on the lock...

Ziggy V/O: I need you...

Milli looks up, grimacing. She turns to Jake.

Milli: Can you tell if that's Ziggy?
Jake: You know him better than me...
Milli: Yeah... I guess... but you've got that thing you can do....
Jake: I don't know. Probably.

Escher shouts up from the bottom of the stairwell:

Escher: Did you hear that as well?
Milli: Okay, that's it - Ziggy's in trouble. That's much more important than finding Adelia. Let's go!
Jake: We can't just leave her!

Milli's already running down the stairs, two at a time.

Milli: Andy!
Andy: Found her?
Milli: We think they're in there!... Don't kill her or anything.

Andy: I wasn't gonna...
Jake: Main hall. Can't be too hard to find...

And the group charges off, leaving Andy to rescue Adelia and Jack to watch Thomas.

Milli and Jake burst out onto the balcony. Looking down, they see Ziggy and Benjamin circling each other. Milli opens her bag and pulls out two pouches of anti-shield powder, handing one to Jake.

Jake: Bombs away?

Milli raises her hand to throw... and finds she can't move it any further.

Her eyes blaze with fury.

Downstairs, the others charge out... and stop in mid-stride.

Benjamin looks around with a raised eyebrow and turns to Ziggy.

Benjamin: Why would you do such a thing?
Ziggy: I've been doing a lot of thinking, father. I have an obligation to my friends, but my obligation to my family must come first. You have given me life. You're entitled to take it from me. This power is not mine... Take it.

Ziggy stands in place, meeting his father's gaze.

Ziggy: I promise I will stand by you to the end. And I intend to keep all my promises.

He glances briefly at Milli, still drawing back her hand to throw with painful slowness...

Ziggy: Will you accept me?
Benjamin: You know what this will mean.
Ziggy: I know.

Benjamin smiles, and places a hand on his son's chest.

Benjamin: On this day, by blood and name, I reap what I have sown. The power to reshape the world in mine own image... To turn the sea to flame, the sky to pitch...

Light starts to flicker around them...

Above, Milli slowly grits her teeth...

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

02-22-2005, 07:40 PM

And below, Emma manages to choke out a single word.

Emma: Free.

There's a flash of light from Milli's bag as the Night Star fragments are used up, and Milli suddenly stumbles forwards. Catching herself on the balcony railing, she throws the bag of powder. It opens and rains down on Benjamin. He looks up, then back down to Ziggy, eyes turning jet black...

Ziggy: Would you like a chocolate-covered pretzel?

Then Ziggy grabs him by the throat and picks him up.

Everyone else is freed. William runs up and charges his taser. Escher levels his crossbow, trying for a clear shot. Sunita takes one, hitting Benjamin in the rump. William fires his taser, and hits father and son together. Neither seems to notice...

Milli charges down, sword raised. Jake looks around as he runs after her.

Benjamin sneers. With one hand, he claws it the air... tearing through it. Black and purple light swirls on the other side of the rip, which starts to spread...

Ziggy: I'll make you suffer, you son of a bitch! For each and every life you've ruined!

Then Benjamin shoves Ziggy back and lands. Bright lights flicker around and between them, back and forth, until finally they are drawn towards Ziggy. He pushes his father back as the portal yawns wide... then his father grabs his wrist and pulls him in as well.

Milli runs to help him, then turns... as the side door explodes.

Jack is thrown through it, landing badly and rolling to a stop at Sunita's feet. Thomas strides in behind him. He raises his ritual dagger and advances.

Thomas: Where were we?

Escher fires his crossbow, and the bolt arcs away. Thomas pauses by him and punches him in the jaw, sending him flying across the room.

Ziggy and his father struggle at the edge of the portal, power crackling between them...

Emma shouts across at Thomas. He grins and she backs away. He stalks towards her, passing Jake... who opens his pouch of powder and flings it at Thomas.

Jake: Have a little fairy dust!

Thomas's warding spell collapses in the flash of light. He snarls with rage, and Jake and Emma are flung off their feet. His hands crackle with lightning...

Then Milli grabs his ritual dagger and slams it into his wrist. Lightning arcs and hisses around it as he screams in pain and outrage.

Andy charges out onto the balcony, hand-in-hand with Adelia. She gasps as he dashes down the stairs, then turns as Julian stumbles in after them, looking down dazedly.

Julian: Ziggy? What... what's happening?

Thomas grabs the dagger, pulling it out with a flick of his wrist, and it extends to the length of a sword, like a baton unfolding...

Thomas and Milli face off. He smiles. They lock swords, fighting for their lives as Ziggy and Benjamin fight for theirs.

Finally, Ziggy pushes free. Benjamin falls, landing heavily, clutching at his eyes with shaking hands.

Ziggy stumbles away as the wind from the vortex tears at him.

William and Sunita help Escher and Emma as Jack staggers to his feet.

Thomas disarms Milli, then raises his sword to strike. She charges forwards and grabs him, throws him over her shoulder and puts her foot down on his neck.

The group gather around him, apart from Ziggy, still gazing at the widening tear in the world...

Thomas: Well. Someone has to close that. Any volunteers? I don't have the kind of power required...

Ziggy picks his brother up and drags him over to the portal - and throws him in.

Jake: Where does it go?
Ziggy: Nowhere good. Anyway, I have good news and bad news. The bad news is, I think I left the heating on at home. The good news is, I can close this portal thingy... But not from this side.
Milli: What do you mean?
Sunita: What about the dust from the crystal?
Emma: Uh... I used it to get Milli out of the time-stop spell. Oh God...
Ziggy: So...

He looks over to the portal.

Milli: You're not...
Ziggy: I am.
Milli: No you're not! There has to be something we can do!
Ziggy: You can get to a safe distance and watch.
Milli: What, your father can't do it? He's not a magician any more?
Ziggy: Not any more. Whatever power he had is mine now. Which means I have to do this.

Milli's eyes fill with tears. Ziggy looks close to crying as well.

Milli: No... you don't... there has to be another way.
Ziggy: (shaking his head slowly) We've got about two minutes.

Then a hand emerges from the portal and grabs Ziggy's shoulder. Thomas drags himself out and, with a wave of his hand, discarded weapons fly into the air, aimed at the backs of the group's heads...

A crossbow bolt hits Milli in the shoulder. She cries out, turns around, sees the swords, daggers and bolts flying towards everyone else... and breaks her bracelet.

Time slows to a crawl again, for everyone except her. She looks around. Emma stands right beside her, oblivious to the ashtray hanging in the air behind her. Milli shoves her aside. Then she runs over to knock aside a sword aimed at William, kick a hatchet away from Escher, pluck a crossbow bolt out of the air behind Sunita, then runs full tilt to knock away the dagger heading from Thomas to Andy. Too late she sees the dagger inches away from Jake, and time seems to slow for her too as she desperately throws herself between them...

Then time starts again. Ziggy throws Thomas over his shoulder and onto the floor... then everyone looks around as Emma lands with a yelp, weapons clatter to the floor... and Milli falls to the ground, the hilt of a dagger sticking out of her chest.

CUT!

Craig Oxbrow

02-22-2005, 07:42 PM

Jake: NO!

Everyone runs over. Milli coughs and shudders. Sunita carefully removes the dagger. Milli screams and chokes back tears as Su tries to bind the wound.

Ziggy: Milli, what the hell did you do?
Milli: What I... had to do.
Ziggy: (looking at her wounds) Something really, really stupid.
Milli: Had to do something... Everyone was gonna die...
Sunita: look. The wound, it's... going blue.
Escher: Oh God.
Ziggy: I can try to -
Escher: TRY!
Ziggy: The infusion of magic is the problem...

Jake walks over to Thomas. Ziggy's brother glares up at him. He kicks him across the face and drags him over to the portal, wrenches his neck sideways, and throws him in. Jake stalks back over to where Milli is lying.

Ziggy: Hey...
Milli: If you're Thomas... (coughs) I'll be really, really pissed off.

Ziggy manages to smile, which just sets the tears rolling down faster.

Ziggy: This may hurt...

He lays a hand on the wound. Adelia stands, limps over to Milli and looks down. She wipes her tears away, rubs her hands together, and takes Ziggy's hand in hers. She shudders and grits her teeth as a pale light moves from her, through Ziggy and into Milli. Then she withdraws, stumbling.

Adelia: That's all I can do. I'm sorry. It's up to her.

They look down... and find that Milli has passed out.

Ziggy: Milli! Talk to me!
Jake: (quietly) no, don't go…

No response.

Ziggy: Don’t make me come after you!

Milli coughs and opens her eyes weakly.

Milli: (cough) Wouldn’t want to inter... (cough) inter... rupt your TV schedule *cough*
Ziggy: Okay. One problem on hold...
William: That portal's getting kind of big...

Milli opens her eyes and she turns her head towards the portal, then turns to look at Jake. Her eyes flicker and close again.

Ziggy: I have to run now. I don't know what else to say. You'll be okay?
Milli: No... NO. Don't go.

She opens her eyes to look at him, then tries to kick him again

Ziggy: I appreciate the gesture, but... (looks into her eyes) I have to do this.
Milli: No...
Ziggy: It's the right thing to do. It's what you'd do.
Milli: But, I'm a goody-goody... you're not...
Ziggy: And I'm not really a selfish bastard, but you already knew that. Don’t worry about me. Just take care, okay?
Milli: No. NO! William, (coughs) don't let him go! He doesn't need to leave, it'll be fine...
Ziggy: I have to go. But, I promise I will come back for you. Whatever happens… I will come back for you.

Milli grabs his arm.

Milli: Please... don't go. Don't go.
Ziggy: This is bigger than you or me.
Milli: Is there any other way?
Ziggy: If there is... I'll find it. You're safe, that’s all that matters. But I'll find a way.
Milli: Promise?
Ziggy: Promise. I... I need you not to give up. Not like this. Not on me.

Milli lets go. Ziggy smiles sadly and gets up heading for the portal, he stops.

Ziggy: One more for the road.

He turns back to Milli and kisses her. Kneeling at the side, Jake looks away, clenching his fists. His eyes firmly closed.

As they break their kiss, he smiles and winks... before leaping into the portal.

All the windows in the hall shatter and fall inwards, raining glass on the floor as the room is filled with a rumble like thunder.

Milli flinches and cries out softly. Her head falls slightly to one side - Jake's side. Her eyes flicker upwards, and her hand reaches out towards him, but he doesn't seem to notice. Her head falls further.

Chase looks inside, steps away, and takes out his phone.

Chase: Yes sir. It would appear that we won. Two casualties... Yes. And Miss Blackhurst... Yes sir. Regrettable, but within acceptable parameters.

Adelia stumbles over to where Julian sits. Andy puts a hand on her shoulder.

Andy: What'll you do?
Adelia: Look after my family...

William tries to help Milli to her feet. As she tries to stand, her eyes seek out Jake, who is still gazing angrily into the distance. Her legs start to buckle, and she begins to collapse.

William: Don't worry, Milli, he'll... Milli?
Milli: William... you have to take care of them now... and tell... tell him... I...

Milli's head sags and her eyes close again...

William and Escher hold her, Escher cradling her head as they gently lay her down. The group gathers over her...

The camera pans back as everyone falls silent, any attempts to speak drowned out by the wail of ambulance sirens. And somewhere in the sound mix, the sirens turn to the low wailing at the start of David Bowie's Heroes.

I... I will be king...
And you... you will be queen...
And nothing, nothing will keep us together...
We can beat them, forever and ever...
Oh, we can be heroes, just for one day...

CREDITS.

Craig Oxbrow

02-22-2005, 07:43 PM

The hall outside the office. A flash of black and purple light, and a figure stumbles out of a portal torn in the air. Ziggy, battered and unshaven, staggers to the office door.

The heart is a bloom, shoots up through the stony ground...

Finding it locked, he knocks on it... hammers on it. No answer.

There's no room, no space to rent in this town...

He stumbles away and out. He heads for Milli's room, and a girl he doesn't recognise answers the door.

You're out of luck and the reason that you had to care...

He looks in, and sees that the room is totally different.

The traffic is stuck and you're not moving anywhere...

Heading for the Brody, he doesn't recognise anyone there. And the fittings are different.

You thought you found a friend to lead you out of this place...

Ziggy grabs the bartender's phone before he can complain, and punches in Milli's number. No answer. It is not listed. Then he picks up a newspaper and starts scribbling out names and numbers of who else he can call.

Someone you could lend a hand in return for grace...

Then he sees the date.

It's Saturday. June Fifth.

2004.

He looks up straight into the camera... his expression turns from horror to anger as his eyes turn jet black.

IT'S A BEAUTIFUL DAY!

ACTUAL PLAY PRODUCTIONS
"Oh, I need a hug..."

Craig Oxbrow

02-22-2005, 07:44 PM

DVD Commentary

(William attempts to bluff Charlotte about the lab accident)
Craig: Large leak, very dangerous! Give us a moment to lock it down...
Derek: Boring conversation anyway!

(Ziggy: Everybody turn their phones off.)
Derek: HELLO? Yes, I'm having a fight! Yes, a FIGHT! No, it's RUBBISH!

(Milli tells William to watch Thomas)
Cat: Goddamn it, one job! He had one job!

(Jack gets thrown fifteen feet)
Everybody: YAAAAY!
Craig: Poor, poor Jack.

(Thomas emerges from the duct tape unscathed)
David: He should have no eyebrows.
Craig: I felt it detracted from his sense of threat...

(Jake kills Thomas)
Craig: I wasn't sure how to finish Thomas off. I thought about having Julian kill him, but Jake doing it was Derek's idea.

Craig: We knew going into the season that this episode would mark Ziggy's departure. Milli leaving was a much later addition.

Varyar

02-22-2005, 08:35 PM

Great stuff, as always. ::sniff:: Double dose of angst, huh?

Craig Oxbrow

02-22-2005, 08:45 PM

Great stuff, as always. ::sniff:: Double dose of angst, huh?
At least. With mini-marshmallows.

Varyar

02-23-2005, 04:47 AM

At least. With mini-marshmallows.

Mmm, marshmallows...

Sorry, zoned out for a second. When will we see the next installment? :)

Joe Dizzy

02-23-2005, 05:56 AM

Ziggy: Would you like a chocolate-covered sandwich?

It's pretzel, actually.

Damn me for messing up my pop references!

Craig Oxbrow

02-23-2005, 06:35 AM

It's pretzel, actually.

Damn me for messing up my pop references!
Okay, that's less disgusting but I still don't know what it means.

Joe Dizzy

02-23-2005, 06:59 AM

Okay, that's less disgusting but I still don't know what it means.

It's a line from Mallrats. One of Brodie's brilliant ideas how to screw somebody over. It involves putting your hand into your pants for an extended period of time.

Don't ask.

Craig Oxbrow

02-23-2005, 07:08 AM

It's a line from Mallrats. One of Brodie's brilliant ideas how to screw somebody over. It involves putting your hand into your pants for an extended period of time.

Don't ask.
Ah, yes.

Allison Wonderland

02-24-2005, 04:15 AM

I just spent the last day reading that. Now I need more!

sasori

02-24-2005, 06:28 AM

I just spent the last day reading that. Now I need more!

That episode, or that whole thing?

If the first, then fair enough, but if the second, did the lobotomy take place before or after? :p

Not to worry though, there's a whole new series on its way, right C!? ;)

Allison Wonderland

02-24-2005, 06:33 AM

That episode, or that whole thing?

If the first, then fair enough, but if the second, did the lobotomy take place before or after? :p

Not to worry though, there's a whole new series on its way, right C!? ;)
The latter. I started kinda idly searching through, but by the end I was compelled to read all 49 pages.

Before, I guess.

Craig Oxbrow

02-24-2005, 08:45 AM

If the first, then fair enough, but if the second, did the lobotomy take place before or after? :p
Be nice, you...

Thanks Allison!

Allison Wonderland

02-24-2005, 10:00 AM

Thanks Allison!
You're welcome. Now keep it coming! ;)

Coffee_Lifeform

03-08-2005, 04:30 PM

I just spent the last day reading that. Now I need more!

I'm very impressed that someone other than me's done that!! Yeah, it's a bit darn habit-forming alright, that game.

:D

Craig Oxbrow

03-08-2005, 05:21 PM

Jake dreams...

His dreams are vivid. Faces appear before him. Ziggy, Milli and Thomas figure heavily, though others can be discerned in the maelstrom, Victoria, Emma, Sunita. The whirling stops, Jake is standing in the office with Milli. She fumbles a cigarette out of her bag and lights it. Jake looks at her with surprise, and she smiles, wryly.

Milli I can smoke here if I want to. And hi, by the way. How are ya?
Jake: Hi! How am I? I don’t know. Fine, I guess. No, that’s not true, I feel like I've been torn in half. (sighs) How're you?
Milli: I'm as okay as could be expected.

She pauses, and looks at him, frowning, before starting to speak again.

Milli: It's weird, all the times I ran through this in my head, and all the ways it could happen, I never thought it'd be like this.
Jake: (snorts) Not the most ideal setup is it? What with you being... gone and all.

Jake looks away.

Milli: Typical bloody me, isn't it. Right... I suppose I should start with the easy bit... I miss you. I feel like there's this big gap somewhere in the middle of my chest. Slightly to the left of where the dagger hit, in case you thought it might be that. And... well... I wish things had been different. With us. I mean, okay, so you were with Emma, and that was fine, and I was really happy for you both cos you always seemed really happy, but of course who wouldn't be happy? but afterwards...
Jake: Happy? I guess we were for a while, but it didn't last. It was just... It wasn't right. I was with her, but she's not the one who plagued my every thought. She wasn't the one I was with in my heart.
Milli: I wish I'd just done something, or said something. I wish I'd tried. Even if you'd laughed in my face, at least then I wouldn't be left wondering for the rest of eternity... I was just so afraid you'd... well, I would have died if I'd been wrong about... the night of your gig, the day after, you seemed... it seemed like maybe you... I thought that you might...
Jake: The gig, right, I remember.

(Flashback to Milli dancing with Ziggy)

Milli rolls her eyes and there's a long pause while she stares intently at Jake, as if seeing him for the first time. She takes a deep breath before continuing again.

Milli: I thought maybe you saw me as more than just Milli the annoying chick that was always hanging around; as more than just a friend. Maybe even as a person that you might consider kissing every now and again, and not just cos you were possessed and evil and needed someone to sacrifice, but because you actually wanted to. And maybe even liked...
Jake: ...and liked you? Do you have any idea what that kiss meant? It may have started as him, but it brought me back. Milli, you saved my goddamn life! I was in there, I could see everything he was doing, and I had no input. I could feel you through his hands, and the thought of him violating you, of harming you, I couldn't let it happen. You brought me back. He was destroying everything around me, and it was with you that pulled at me hard enough to return. I just wish...

Milli puts out her cigarette and looks off into the distance, behind Jake.

Milli: I should probably go. But I never got the chance to say this to you, and maybe you already know, but I want to say it to you regardless. Being around you made me happy in a way I didn't think I ever could be, in a way that I can't even tell you about because I’ve got a whole extended vocab for moping and whining but none that could describe that jumpy thing my heart did when you smiled at me or how my breath got stuck when you'd look at me and wrinkle up your eyes like somewhere underneath it all you were...
Jake: ...thinking the same thing as you. Now wouldn't that be ironic! (snorts) Milli, I'm not one for monologues, never was, that's more Ziggy’s field... was more Ziggy’s field. I don't know, I don't know anything anymore. But please, don't spend eternity wondering, there is only one constant left in my life, and that is every day I wake up and you're not there, and I hurt. I hurt more than any punch from a vamp, more than anything I've ever felt before. I guess I thought it would all be okay, you know, "Jake the eternal optimist". But it's not going to be okay, it's never going to be okay again, 'cos you're not here.

He pauses.

Jake: Milli, I love you, always have and I always will.

She smiles, although her eyes have started to well up with tears.

Milli: I guess it doesn't really matter any more, does it. So fare thee well, sweet prince, and God speed. There's a helluva lot of vampire ass to be kicked out there, and I need someone to get it sorted for me.
Jake: (smirks) I'll see what I can do, but, you know, without our little slayerette, it ain't going to be easy.

Her smile fading, she reaches over to touch Jake on the brow.

Jake: Milli, don't go. I don't know if I can bear to lose you again!
Milli: You'll always have me.

Milli steps towards Jake. Reaching up, on tiptoes, she puts her arms round his neck. Jake reaches down to her. Their eyes meet, and then close.

And they kiss.

Since the invention of the kiss, there have five kisses that were rated the most passionate, the most pure. This one left them all behind.

What do you get when you fall in love,
A girl with a pin to burst your bubble,
That's what you get for all your trouble,
I'll never fall in love again...

Jake wakes. He is in his room. He groans, rubs his eyes and sighs. His attention is drawn to something on his bedpost. He reaches over to find a thin chain, with a silver cross pendant. He encloses it in his hand and closes his eyes tight.

What do you get when you kiss a girl?
You get enough germs to catch pneumonia,
After you do, she'll never phone ya'
I'll never fall in love again...

Jake, in his room, throwing the last of his clothes into a bag. He walks out to the main room of the flat he shares with Andy. Takes a look around at the devastation and smiles. The sounds of snoring can be heard from Andy's room. Jake sighs, picks up his guitar bag from the corner, walks out and closes the door behind him quietly.

Don't tell me what it's all about,
'Cause I've been there and I'm glad I'm out,
Out of those chains, those chains that bind you,
That is why I'm here to remind you,
What do you get when you give your heart,
You get it all broken up and battered,
That's what you get, a heart that's shattered,
I'll never fall in love again...

Jake walking down the road from campus, the early flicker of dawn on the horizon. He heads for the bus station. There's a bus with engine idling. He buys a ticket and goes to board. He pauses at the step, drops the end of his cigarette to the ground, steps on it, and exhales the smoke from his lungs. He looks towards the sun on the horizon through narrowed eyes, and steps on the bus.

What do you get when you fall in love,
You only get lies and pain and sorrow,
So for at least until tomorrow,
I'll never fall in love again,
I'll never fall in love again.