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[In Which I Watch] Sailor Moon

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Jhiday

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One of my weird habits regarding anime is, once I've started watching a few episodes of a show, to look up on Wikipedia where I've heard the voice actors before (mainly the voice actresses, let's not kid ourselves).

It's burned me a bit with some spoilers in the past, but I often find the connections interesting and fun (did you now that the same voice-actress played one of Black Lagoon's creepy twins (I think Gretel), and Azumanga Daioh's Chiyo-chan ?).
 

Unka Josh

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Honestly, that's nowhere near the craziest example of "This voice actor played this character and that character?!?!?!?!?" out there.
 

David J Prokopetz

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It's burned me a bit with some spoilers in the past, but I often find the connections interesting and fun (did you now that the same voice-actress played one of Black Lagoon's creepy twins (I think Gretel), and Azumanga Daioh's Chiyo-chan ?).
I think my favourite bit of voice-actor-related tomfoolery is that they got the same woman to voice both the titular character of The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya and Konata in Lucky Star in their respective English dubs specifically so that the gag about Konata's dead-perfect Haruhi impression would work in both languages.
 

Stephen Lea Sheppard

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"I have no use for ordinary menus!" remains, I think, one of the funniest lines I have ever seen in any medium.
 

ANT Pogo

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I think my favourite bit of voice-actor-related tomfoolery is that they got the same woman to voice both the titular character of The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya and Konata in Lucky Star in their respective English dubs specifically so that the gag about Konata's dead-perfect Haruhi impression would work in both languages.
Actually, they did that for virtually ALL the voice-actor gags in Lucky Star - Sam Riegel played Taniguchi in MoHS as well as voice-actor-playing-himself Minoru Shiraishi in LS (Minoru voiced Taniguchi in the original MoHS), Johnny Yong Bosch did the same when he played both Itsuki Koizumi in MoHS and Daisuke Ono (original voice of Itsuki) in LS, and they even got Crispin Freeman and Michelle Ruff to reprise their Kyon and Yuki voices for the cosplay cafe bit in LS, just as Tomokazu Sugita and Minori Chihara did.

"I have no use for ordinary menus!" remains, I think, one of the funniest lines I have ever seen in any medium.
I utterly and completely agree!
 

Shadowjack

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Episode #19: Usagi is Thrilled! Tuxedo Mask's Love Letter.

• RECAP
"I used to live in a city of winter… and I still do, come to think of it. Tokyo, city of pleasure; Tokyo, city of killers. I have some protection from my place with the respected Moon Company. But death is always–"
"What are you doing here?"
"Oh, hello, Dumpling-Head, do you record here, too?"
"GET OUT!"



• NEPHRITE'S EVIL MANSION: Good morning!
Nephrite: "Astro-babble, astro-babble, astro-babble. What is the Sailor Senshi's weakness?"
The Stars: "Pick a number from one to ten."
Nephrite: "…Four."
The Stars: "Tuxedo Mask. And now, recap footage."
Zoisite /appears. "Hello!"
Nephrite: "GAH!"
Zoisite: "Beryl wants you. And not that way."



• LENG:
Queen Beryl: "So… I hear you've been having problems."
Zoisite: "The universe was not created overnight."
Queen Beryl: "Allow to me explain the nature of an absolute monarchy: when I, the monarch, issue an order, I expect–"
Zoisite /giggles.
Nephrite: "CAN IT, PONYTAIL!"
Queen Beryl /snerk.
Nephrite: "I am one of the Great Four of the Dark Kingdom, and I don't need you breathing down my neck. I'm already working on a cunning plan to–"
Zoisite: "Hello, did Jadeite just come back into the room?"
Queen Beryl /cracks up. "Take it outside, boys."



• TSUKINO RESIDENCE:
Usagi: "ZOMG ZOMG ZOMG I got a letter from Tuxedo Mask! 'Darling! I love you more than anyone else. Meet me at the Microsoft Store in Shinjuku tomorrow night. XOXOXOXO Tuxedo Mask.'"
Luna: "Why the heck would Tuxedo Mask send you a letter?"
Usagi: "Because he loves me!"
Luna: "How the heck did he learn you were Sailor Moon?"
Usagi: "Because he loves me!"
Luna: "How do we know if he's even on our side?"
Usagi: "He loves me! He loves me!"
Luna: "But why would he invite you to the frikkin' Microsoft Store? Why aren't you listening to me? Why am I even bothering to try? Why? Why? Why?"



• SCHOOL THE NEXT DAY:
A building collapses from the force of someone's scream.
Usagi: "EVERYONE got letters from Tuxedo Mask?"
Naru: "Every girl in the district. Do you know him?"
Usagi: "…Apparently NOT."
Naru: "I hope it's Masato Sanjoin, the wealthy and eccentric tennis coach. He's dreamy."
Ms. Haruna: "Ladies, this is obviously a prank, a child abductor, or a desperate man with no taste, and I'm sure we're all clever enough to not respond to the invitation."
Class: "Yes, Ms. Haruna."



• CUT TO: Ami in a gym uniform.
Luna: "Look, help me confirm my sanity—this is suspicious, right?"
Ami: "I'll place Rei on standby."



• AFTER SCHOOL at the Video Arcade, Motoki fills in Mamoru.
Mamoru /points at the plushie toys in THE CRAW! machine. "So, Tuxedo Mask is that one, right?"
Motoki: "That's the one. The merchandising machine is fast, isn't it?"
Usagi /wanders in. "Sigh."
Usagi: "Dramatic sigh."
Motoki: "She isn't reacting to you with disgust. Something's terribly wrong."
Mamoru: "Wait, wait, let me guess. Everyone got one of those letters except you."
Usagi /blubbers something about letters and Tuxedo Mask and infidelity and WAAAAAAH.



• REI'S PLACE:
Rei: "Well, I guess it's a good thing the letter's bogus, because I have the flu."
Ami: "I'll take care of you!"
Rei: "If that was innuendo, I'm too sick to respond."
Ami: "No, I'm just being dutiful."



• LATER THAT DAY: At the Microsoft Store.
Nephrite: "I can't think of a more fitting place for Sailor Moon to die than here."
Naru: "Er… excuse me? Mister Sanjoin? Remember me, from the tennis club?"
Nephrite /turns on the charm. "Why, of course, the little redhead with the killer serve. Considering upgrading to Windows 3.1?"
Naru: "I… er… Are you Tuxedo Mask?"
Nephrite /OH SHIT SHE KNOWS. "Eh-heh, why do you ask?"
Naru: "Just wishful thinking, I guess."
Nephrite /thinks. "Ah-ha! She's could be Sailor Moon in disguise!"
Nephrite /leans forward. "You're the cutest girl at your school."
Nephrite /hand on Naru's shoulder. "I've been interested in you for a long–"

OKAY! OKAY! STOP THE SCENE!
Okay, I admit I've joked a little about Ami's bust and Rei's legs, but this scene suddenly spiked into the Just Plain Wrong Zone. Nephrite just bought himself a one way ticket to the Special Hell.



• AFTERWARD: Naru's up on the roof, in a passionate transport.
Naru: "He likes me, he really likes me!"



• USAGI'S PLACE:
Usagi: "Okay, I could go off all half-cocked, but instead I'll do the reasonable thing and ask Tuxedo Mask for an explanation. Shut up, Luna! It makes perfect sense! Oh, wait, she's not here…"
Usagi: "Anyway: Usagi's Rules for Dating Etiquette:
#1: Wear clean underwear and a nice clean outfit.
#2: Wear a pleasant, non-offensive fragrance.
#3: Brush your teeth, just in case.
#4: Soft pink lip color for a neat, innocent look.
#5: Don't let yourself get caught up in ecstatic visions of your lover and miss the proper time."



• LATE, LATE THAT NIGHT: The Shinjuku stores are starting to close.
But one store suddenly opens.
Naru /walks in. "Hello?"
Tuxedo Nephrite /dramatically. "HELLO!"
Naru /jumps for glee. "ZOMG it is you it is you! Masato Sanjoin is Tuxedo Mask!"
Nephrite /?!?!?!
Nephrite: "How'd you know it was me?"
Naru: "…Your voice? Your stance? Your beautiful flowing red hair? The fact that the mask doesn't really hide your lovely face all that much?"
Nephrite: "Obviously you're Sailor Moon in disguise! No one else could be so perceptive!"
Nephrite /casts spell. "REVEAL YOURSELF, SAILOR MOON!"

Nothing happens.

Nephrite /?!
Naru: "…Do you… want me to be Sailor Moon for you?"



• OUTSIDE: Okay, so who's the dude with the sign in the background? Is that the director, giving himself a cameo? ;)
Usagi: "I'm getting second thoughts, here… maybe I should have brought along the team."
Usagi: "…Nah."
Deedle-dee-da-deedle-dee-da-deedle-dee-da-dee!
Usagi: "Speak of the devil." /picks up the gizmophone. "Yello!"
Ami /on the phone. "Where are you and what are you doing?"
Usagi: "Well, I'm, er, sort of tracking down Tuxedo Mask."
Rei /grabs the phone. "¡BACKSTABBER!" (cough cough) "¡SNEAKTHIEF!"
Usagi /hangs up.



• INSIDE:
Nephrite /casts spell again. "I said REVEAL YOURSELF!"

Nothing continues to happen.

Naru: "What are you trying to do?"
Nephrite /picks Naru up and shakes her. "WHY ISN'T IT WORKING?! Who are you? Why are you here?"
Naru: "…I love you."

ZAP! FOOSH! WHAM! The Energy Meter zips into the red, and Nephrite's in the position of someone suddenly scooping up a flood of gold coins.

Nephrite: "Wh-wh-wh-wh-WHOA! Where'd all this energy come from? Are you doing this?"
Naru /passes out.
Nephrite: "Okay, so she's not Sailor Moon, but look at all this, this is amazing!"

Usagi /walks in.
Usagi /turns around and walks right back out.
Usagi: "That's not Tuxedo Mask!"



• STARKLY CORUSCANT TRANSFORMATION SEQUENCE COUNTER:
Usagi into Sailor Moon: 19
Usagi into Disguise Form: 6
Ami into Sailor Mercury: 6
Rei into Sailor Mars: 4



• AND, FOR THE FIRST TIME ON SCREEN:
Mamoru /was minding his own business. "What the hell?"



• STARKLY CORUSCANT TRANSFORMATION SEQUENCE COUNTER:
Usagi into Sailor Moon: 19
Usagi into Disguise Form: 6
Ami into Sailor Mercury: 6
Rei into Sailor Mars: 4
Mamoru into Tuxedo Mask: 1



• SUDDENLY!
Usagi: "I am the terror that trips in the night!"
Nephrite: "What th–?"
The P.A. system starts playing Sailor Moon's power-up theme!
Usagi: "I am the out-of-order escalator that forces Crime to walk upstairs!"
Usagi /bursts in, dramatically lit! "I AM SAILOR MOON! And you, you imposter, are going to the Special Hell!"
Nephrite: "Okay, seriously, does the mask do nothing? You can really tell that quickly that I'm not Tuxedo Mask?"
Usagi: "Hey, I know you, you're what's-his-face, the rich tennis underwear model guy!"
Nephrite: "Oh, for crying out loud!" /unmasks, throws the old costume away. "So why can't I tell who you are, when you don't even wear a mask?"
Usagi: "Because of the Power of Love!"

< USAGI : TECH > S.KICK : NEPHRITE >
Nephrite has lost his hat!

Usagi: "Masato Sanjoin, that was the name! I knew I'd remember it."
Nephrite /very serious. "I AM NEPHRITE–"
Usagi: "Who?"
Nephrite /very serious. "I AM NEPHRITE; one of the Great Four of the Dark Kingdom, Nurb of Morris Minor, Guardian of the Floating Point Exception, Supreme Nobless of the–"
Usagi: "Shouldn't that be 'Noble'?"
Nephrite: "No, actually, it's 'Nobless', long story. AND YOU'RE IN MY TRAP!"
Usagi: "Oh no! More boxed text!"
<< Nephrite summons Leo! >>
Nephrite: "Who needs exposition? I think I'll tear you into little pieces!"
Usagi: "I don't care what you think!" /flees.
Usagi /trips.
Usagi: "Of all the stupid times to–"



• BUT WAIT!
Enter Tuxedo Mask, dramatically, armed with +3 blessed throwing roses.
Leo /hides behind Nephrite.
Nephrite: "Who are you?"
Usagi: "What are you, dense?"
Tuxedo Mask: "He can't tell because I'm wearing a mask."
Usagi /points. "It's the real Tuxedo Mask."
Nephrite: "…"
The P.A. system starts playing funky jazz music!
Tuxedo Mask /strikes en garde. "Shall we handle this like men?"
Nephrite: "No, I think I'll — get out there, you! heel, damn it! — have my star-spangled lion tear your throat out."
< USAGI : TECH > MOONTIARA : LEO >
<< Leo is hit! No damage! >>
Usagi: "Crap, it's immune! What's the plan?"
Tuxedo Mask: "Run like hell."



• THEY RUN! Right into an elevator.
Nephrite: "HA!"
Doors close and seal.
Nephrite /over the P.A. "How ironic that you will soon be killed by one of Earth's laws."
Tuxedo Mask: "Would that be the Law of Gravity, by any chance?"
Nephrite /over the P.A. "The elevator will soon drop, and you both will become pancakes!"
Usagi: "I hate pancakes."

The elevator starts to ascend.

Usagi: "Since this will be our last minute in this life, we should make out."
Tuxedo Mask: "Or we could climb out the roof hatch."



• ON THE ROOF: They bail out, of course, at the last possible moment. The elevator plummets.
Nephrite: "There's no way they could have survived that fall!"
{Nephrite has left the scene.}

Usagi /hangs on for dear life. "My arms! My poor arms!"
Tuxedo Mask /hangs on for dear life. "My legs! My poor legs!"
Tuxedo Mask /starts trying to climb up. "We should distract each other by talking about something."
Usagi: "Yes, because a hundred-foot-drop is a perfect place to distract you."
Tuxedo Mask: "Don't remind me about the hundred-foot-drop."
Usagi: "Sorry! I didn't mean to remind you."
Tuxedo Mask: "Stop reminding me about the reminding about the–"
Usagi: "Right! Right! Changing subject now! Uh…"
Usagi: "Why do you always want to rescue me?"
Tuxedo Mask: "Dunno."
Usagi: "Who are you, really?"
Tuxedo Mask: "Dunno."
Usagi: "Do you like me?"
Tuxedo Mask: "Dunno."
Usagi: "What's your favorite color?"
Tuxedo Mask: "Dunno."
Usagi: "You're not very much of a talker, are you?"
Tuxedo Mask: "No, but I have an extending cane."
Usagi: "I noticed that. It's kind of hard to miss. Can you do a lot with it?"
Tuxedo Mask: "I haven't had any complaints."
Usagi: "Hmmm."
Tuxedo Mask: "I kind of feel like we've met somewhere before."
Usagi: "Me too."
Tuxedo Mask: "By the way, I can't pull us up any farther, and I'm about to lose my grip. Any last words?"
Usagi: "G–"



• BUT FORTUNATELY! At the moment the elevator doors open, and Rei, Ami, and Luna pull them up to saety.
Ami: "Okay, seriously, what were you thinking going off alone?"
Usagi: "Wasn't!"
Ami: "Obviously."
Rei /is wearing a mask because of her illness.
Usagi: "Superpowers don't make one immune to the common cold, eh? Well that sucks."
Rei: "I'll just say a few words here to prove that this is character development, and not a clever dodge to avoid the expense of animating lip flaps. See? The mask moves."
Usagi: "Oh, and thanks for saving us, you guys."
Rei /slap! "¡PUTA! Sneaking around behind my back and draping yourself all over him."
Tuxedo Mask: "Please don't fight…"
Ami: "Am I going to have carry Naru to the hospital by myself? Here, you, in the opera cloak, help me out here."
Tuxedo Mask: "Sorry, I have to disappear mysteriously."
Ami: "Well, go ahead, then."
Tuxedo Mask: "…"
Ami: "Well?"
Tuxedo Mask: "I can't do it if you're watching me."
Rei: "¿Watching you do what?"
Usagi: "Yeah, what?"
Tuxedo Mask: "Look, just turn around, or go look in your pockets, or something. I'll go when you're distracted."



• BACK AT LENG:
Zoisite: "Nephrite fucked it uuuuuuuup."
Queen Beryl: "But look at how much energy he brought back! A few more fuck-ups of this sort and we'll be in business! Nephrite!"
Nephrite: "Yes?"
Queen Beryl: "You're off the hook today."
Zoisite: "BUT BUT BUT–"
Queen Beryl: "I can punish him any time I want. Now get back to your post, minion."



• DENOUEMENT: Nephrite's Evil Mansion
Nephrite: "That was an incredible amount of energy to get from just one person in such a short period of time. 'Love', eh? Well, I think I can use this foolish human emotion to my advantage. This cannot possibly backfire upon me in any way."

Meanwhile, up on Mount Olympus: The Gods are laughing and laughing and placing bets on how long he'll last before he takes his fall.
 

sun_tzu

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OKAY! OKAY! STOP THE SCENE!
Okay, I admit I've joked a little about Ami's bust and Rei's legs, but this scene suddenly spiked into the Just Plain Wrong Zone. Nephrite just bought himself a one way ticket to the Special Hell.
Oh man...You just till you see the rest of his arc. :eek:
 

Stephen Lea Sheppard

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Sailor Moon really works better as a narrative if you assume that it's okay for any two characters to hook up as long as they've both got attractive character designs.
 
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