• The Infractions Forum is available for public view. Please note that if you have been suspended you will need to open a private/incognito browser window to view it.

In Which Shadowjack Watches Sailor Moon S (you are thread No. 6)

JoAT

Master of the Universe
*Claps gleefully* Yay, it's back! :D No more depressing EVA! ;)

Subscribed!
This. I marathoned the threads, but I had to give up near the end - it was just getting too depressing.

And now Shadowjack's Sailor Moon is back! With one of the best seasons EVAR!!!1!!one!
 

David J Prokopetz

Social Justice Henchman
RPGnet Member
Validated User
This entire tangent is hilarious, but this line I find particularly sublime.
You realise, of course, that even if you do absolutely nothing with the accidental implication that Gendo and Yui are Mamoru's classmates, the rest of us are going to assume that it's the case anyway from here on out, right? :D

(In my head, he met them because he'd somehow gotten the idea that Metaphysical Biology was an easy elective. He was mistaken.)
 
Last edited:

zakueins

New member
Banned
Damn it, I now have an idea...and, I blame you Shadowjack!

Anyways, webcomic series where five 25-year-old women meet up at this abandoned lot and start to get really drunk. (NOT QUESTIONABLE CONTENT!)

The five girls are all former "magical girls" that fought the last big magical battle that night on that spot ten years ago and come back every year to sort of celebrate/remember it and a name keeps getting bounced around...

Then, suddenly, magical vortex!

Characters wake up in their beds, the night of the first time they met the girl that kept getting bounced around...and they go to see her first battle.

And then, we learn that why the sixth girl isn't there is why they're in that lot every year at the time...it's the battle where she gave her life to stop the Big Bad.

So, do they try to change the past? Can they change the past?

And what happens when the bad guys start to remember the past as well...
 

JohnBiles

Registered User
Validated User
You realise, of course, that even if you do absolutely nothing with the accidental implication that Gendo and Yui are Mamoru's classmates, the rest of us are going to assume that it's the case anyway from here on out, right? :D

(In my head, he met them because he'd somehow gotten the idea that Metaphysical Biology was an easy elective. He was mistaken.)
I second the motion to make Gendo and Yui Mamoru's non-canonical thread-canonical classmates!
 

Shadowjack

Cartoon Poet
RPGnet Member
Validated User
Episode #90: Premonition of the World's End? Mysterious New Soldiers.

Hikawa Shrine, Saturday Night
SCENE: Our heroines, about the table, with papers, pencils, and snacks all ready to hand.

Rei: "So that's the situation so far. ¿Is everyone ready to go?"
Ami: "I… I admit I missed a few sessions because of cram school, but when did she start coming here? Does she even speak our language?"
Yamandakka: "Yamandakka!"
Mako: "Well, we needed a cleric."
Mina: "Show 'em, honey."
Yamandakka /rolls dice. "CRITICAL HIT! Kill you, take stuff. Yamandakka!"
Ami: "…I think she'll fit in just fine. So that's why we're using the battle map now."
Rei: "Yeah, so she can point. ¿Están bien? ¡Okay!"

Rei: "You're all on the ship, and the phlogiston is clear. You see several crystal spheres off to the port side."
Usagi: "I've been worrying…"
Mina: "You should be; clear phlogiston is a bad sign. I'm prepping spell list B."
Usagi: "No, I mean, about my future. What lies in store."
Ami: "Glad to hear it! It's never too early to make plans. Do you want advice on picking colleges?"
Mina: "I thought she was running a fighter?"
Usagi: "No, not that. I meant the Sailor Princess gig."
Mako: "Oh, that thing. But it's been all quiet lately!"
Rei: "¿Are we playing? We're not playing."
Usagi: "Yeah, lately, but come on, it's only a matter of time. So I've been reading up on, y'know, magic and anthropology and stuff."
Ami: "Doing research? Who are you and what have you done with—"
Usagi:: "No, no, seriously! Because it's all, like, relevant to my life now."
Rei: "Here, let's you and me look over that spell list."
Mina: "I had it here somewhere…" /shuffles papers.

Usagi: "Like, I've conquered Death, right, and communed with actual goddesses. We said so! Er, will say so. Whatever. So that's big shaman stuff, like Rei does."
Rei: "…Not exactly like—"
Rei /thinks better of it and bites her tongue.
Usagi: "I've faced loneliness and loss and love, and personal growth, conquered death and travelled to other realms of existence, touched both spiritual and worldly power, commanded growing things, and, metaphorically, seen parenthood from birth through teenage to adulthood. So now I'm wondering what's left?"
Mako: "You mean what challenge is next?"
Usagi: "Yeah, or what danger?"
Mako: "…Invasion of the Body Snatchers?"
Usagi: "Been there, done that."
Mako: "Godzilla. Wait, done that, too."
Mina: "The banality of mundane existence?"
Ami: "No such thing."
Rei: "Self-control, tact, and etiquette."
Usagi: "What?"
Rei: "Never mind…"
Usagi: "I mean, there must be something—"
Ami: "Wait, wait, wait. I have it. You're missing an important one." /counts off fingers. "Birth."
Usagi: "Yeah."
Ami: "Love. Marriage. Fear. Fortune. Parenthood. Growth. Loss. Death."
Usagi: "Yeah?"
Ami: "Sex."

Beat.

Usagi /Subject Changing Prana. "So, has my giant space hamster started eating again?"
Rei /instantly. "Yes, she has, however, the gnome in charge of the stables informs you—"
Mako /Idée Fixe Maneuver. "Oh, no you don't! We had a hand in bringing you two together, I think that entitles us to a few juicy details."
Ami: "Yeah!"
Rei: "Frell."
Usagi: "I—"
Mina: "The more salacious the better."
Usagi: "W-we—"
Ami: "Well?"
Usagi: "We haven't— I-I mean, we've kissed—"
Ami: "So we've noticed!"
Mina: "Deeply, frequently, and with both hands."
Mako: "Making out doesn't count."
Ami: "It doesn't?"
Usagi: "—a-and, it's not like we haven't talked—"
Mako: "Oo! Talked, have you?"
Mina: "Kinky!"
Usagi: "N-no! Come on—"
Ami: "If you and he have been having trouble, I can recommend a few books…"
Usagi: "Come on, guys, no, I—"
Rei /Voice of Command. "We are not having this conversation now. She is fourteen—"
Usagi: "Fifteen!"
Rei: "We are all legally fourteen, we are minors, we are not here to discuss the private and personal aspects of Usagi's life, we came here to play, we are not continuing this conversation, and that is final."
Yamandakka: "Yamandakka!"
Rei: "Thank you. ¿Now are we playing or aren't we?"

Beat.

Mina /to Ami. "…What kind of books?"
Rei: :mad: "ROCKS FALL. EVERYONE DIES."
Mako: "We're in space! There's no up for rocks to fall down from!"
Rei: "¡Suddenly, illithids!"
Mako: "Gaaaahhhhh—"
Mina /indignant outrage. "Dude, I had my psionics detector—"
Rei: "¡They had a cloaking device! ¡Roll for initiative!"
Mina: "Screw you, Rei!" /rolls. "Eight!"
Ami /rolls. "FIVE! All hands to battle stations!"
Usagi: "(Thank you, Rei.) Somebody save my hamster!"




Roll Titles!
Silhouetted against the night sky: the Sailors, posing as caryatids, atop Lunar marble pillars. And above them all, their liege: Sailor Moon. The steps to this temple illuminate, and the Sailors' power bursts forth like a flower's petals. She and her vassals leap into the sky—and keep going, flying onward, across the face of the Moon. Titles appear. Montage of headshots and team spotlight shots, Tuxedo Mask runs against the neon lights of the city, the cats spring forth. Arrayed against them: a bespectacled mad scientist and a sultry lady in red. Our heroes fly to battle, into a dazzlingly colorful sequence of powered-up special attacks, culminating in a brief shot of Usagi's cleavage. Red sparkles give forth swarms of killer butterflies, which pierce the dark clouds and let rays of sunlight in, and the Moon sees all this and blesses it. End on the sight of our team posed for a picture upon the silver first steps of Tir Na Nog'th.

It's a new musical mix, too.



A Giant Sucking Sound
SCENE: An entire city suffused with red light, falling into a black storm of Nothing. Every single person in the city is a statue, frozen in mid-stride. Every single person… save one.

Usagi /is a statue.
Mako /is a statue.
Ami /is a statue.
Mina /is a statue.
Rei: "Madre de Dios…"
The Nothing /SLURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRP
Rei /sobs. "My hands weren't strong enough…"

Suddenly, a strange glowing crystalline entity appears!

Crystalline Entity: "…"
Rei: "¿Are you the Messiah? ¡Help them, please!"

Suddenly, a strange glowing crystalline entity disappears!

Rei: "¡NO! ¡PLEASE!"
The Nothing /SLURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRP
Rei: "No…"
The Nothing /consumes the buildings.
The Nothing /consumes the people.
The Nothing /consumes Usagi.
The Nothing /consumes Mako.
The Nothing /consumes Ami.
The Nothing /consumes Mina.
Rei: "¡NO!"
The Nothing /consumes ALL!



Hikawa Shrine, Sunday Afternoon
Rei /wakes up!

SCENE: Our heroines, about the table, with papers, pencils, and snacks all ready to hand.

Usagi /SLURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRP
Rei /shoves Usagi. "Get off."
Usagi /wakes up. "Wha—?"
Rei: "You were drooling on my homework papers."
Ami: "I guess we were all up too late last night. Are you okay?"
Rei: "…Yeah. Fine. Just a dream."
Mina /intently. "Just a dream?"
Rei: "Yes, just a dream."
Mina /raises hands. "Okay!"
Usagi: "Oh, man! I had this totally weird dream, too—"
Mako: "Excuse me, can we skip the dream-time? Color me not interested."
Usagi: "I… but… it's… no… it's totally… it's… y-you're not the boss of… me?"
Ami: "No, I'm the boss of you, because we're in ninth grade now and have to prep for high school entrance exams, and you three knuckleheads are bombing."
Mina: "Because we've been focusing all our time on saving the world!"
Usagi: "Also because us three knuckleheads were relying on our time-slipped memories of the last years' exams to glide through."
Rei /chuckles.
Usagi: "Ah, good, I was worried I was losing my touch…"
Mina: "But you guys fell behind, too!"
Ami: "Which is why Rei and I are now teaching you proper study skills. I should have done this months ago…"
Mako: "May I just say that I think you look lovely in that vest?"
Ami: "Your clever ploy is appreciated, but will not avail you."
Mina /big grin. "W—"
Ami: "Don't you dare clutter up Usagi's addled mind with one of your twisted sayings. You'll murder her score on the verbal. Don't you dare."
Mina /eep!
Usagi: "'Addled'?"
Ami: "Start scribing, you apes. I'm gonna make women out of ya."
Rei /suddenly remembers her dream.
Rei /to herself. "…if we live that long."



Cue Spooky Music
SCENE: Standard-issue mad scientist's labo—

DISK CRAPS OUT











Shadowjack: "Son of a—"
Shadowjack /fiddles with VLC.
VLC /crashes.
Shadowjack /@#$%!
Shadowjack /ejects DVD.
Shadowjack /carefully cleans DVD.
Shadowjack /reinserts DVD.
Shadowjack /opens VLC and recues the program.
VLC /plays quite merrily, without a hitch.
Shadowjack /sighs in relief. "Must have gotten my thumb on the disk when I loaded it. DISASTER AVERTED! Carry on."









Cue Spooky Music
SCENE: Standard-issue mad scientist's laboratory.

Busily working at the table is a mad scientist, humanoid, male, neither obviously old or young. His primary distinguishing features are his eyeglasses and his sharp, sharp grin, both of which glint rather too brightly for sane people to be comfortable. Since we are given no name at this time, I shall dub him:


Victor Von Eyeglasses /MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Victor /adds CHEMICAL X.

Laboratory explosion. More maniacal laughter.

Victor: "Miss Kaorinite! Come here, I want to see you."
Kaorinite /brandishes fire extinguisher. "Yes, Mahster."
Victor: "No time for the Igor act! BEHOLD MY GENIUS!"
Kaorinite /lowers extinguisher, raises eyebrow.
Victor /Sparky. "The DAIMON EGG has finally been completed!"

Kaorinite is a foxy ninja scientist lady. Beneath the labcoat, her colors are red, from hair to heels, save gold earrings. She dresses rather too well for the environs for alert people to be comfortable.

The Daimon Egg is a small pink seed pod, which hovers and twirls.


Victor: "THIS, my latest and most BRILLIANT creation, will UNERRINGLY seek out, pursue, and EXTRACT only the purest light of the human soul—and with that, I shall achieve the HOLY GRAIL! It's so simple, a child could do it! Find the three chosen ones—obviously those with the purest hearts—EXTRACT and purify their heart's light into a physical crystallization—thus embodying the THREE TALISMANS of legend—gather them at one place, and the HOLY GRAIL APPEARS! And then—"
Kaorinite: "And then, yes?"
Victor: "—THE WORLD SHALL BE OURS! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
Kaorinite: "He's so cute when he's in a good mood. …I'd better make sure this widget works." /ninja teleport.

The Daimon Egg flies up and out an air vent, to begin its search pattern…



That Monday Morning
SCENE: Usagi's class. The last round of exams are returned to them.

Usagi: "FIVE PERCENT?!"
Umino: "…Surely you could have done better than that?"
Usagi: "I could have, but I didn't want to admit I knew what some of those words meant!"



Usagi: "What was Ms. Haruna thinking?! Maybe I've finally driven her over the brink…"



And so…
SCENE: Walking home from school.

Usagi: "Five percent. Even Sherlock Holmes did better on his English test, and his professor tried to kill him! Man, after all that studying, I don't want to even know what Rei would do to me if she found out."
Usagi: "Oh, crap! There she is. I had to say it out loud, didn't I?"
Usagi: "She looks really preoccupied. Maybe she won't notice me. I'll just stand off to the side, here, and won't make eye contact. No! Even better, I'll cover my eyes so she can't see me!"
Usagi /covers eyes and waits.
Rei /trips over Usagi.
Usagi: "WHY DO I EVEN BOTHER?!"
Rei: "¡I didn't see you!"



A little later…
SCENE: They bandage their wounds in a nearby park.

Usagi: "Okay, you know the truth, you can kill me now. I can take it."
Rei: "So studying isn't your strong suit. You've got a lot great qualities in spite of it. Don't worry."
Usagi: "…Who are you and what have you done with—"
Rei: "Sorry. Ahem. 'I just had some spare compliments left over. It's not like I meant them or anything.' ¿Está bien?"
Usagi: "Está bien. What up, Rei? You've been odd since that dream yesterday."
Rei: "…"
Usagi: "Just in case, you know, you've been having confused, prophetic dreams of the future, and are thinking that the best approach is to say nothing to nobody and then break off our relationship without any warning or explanation and screw around for several weeks trying to solve the problem yourself, when actually a few words to the wise could have escaped a whole lot of heartbreak for all concerned. Because if we can't learn from our pasts, what can we learn from?"
Rei: "¡Ha ha ha ha! ¡Ha ha! …Um."
Usagi: "So, I say again: What up, Rei?"
Rei /Subject Changing Prana. "¿What are your plans for the future?"
Usagi: "OH BOY LET'S TALK ABOUT OUR FUTURES LOL I see through you."

Rei: "Seriously. ¿What do you want to be when you grow up? ¿You thinking of college?"
Usagi: "…Hell if I know, Rei. What are the job requirements for a monarch? Let alone a goddess?"
Rei: "It appears we have plenty of time in-between for us to do our own things."
Usagi: "True. Bleh! I dunno, it's all so mixed up. What about you? You fishing for ideas?"
Rei: "Oh, I know what I want to do. Singer-songwriter, model, voice actress, political science blogger…"
Usagi: "Nice to see you're setting easy goals for yourself."
Rei: "…instant food chemist, pyrotechnics consultant, and… er…" /suddenly blushes.
Usagi /leans close. "…Go on. It's just us here."
Rei /shoves Usagi over in embarrassment. "¡A devoted wife!" /squeeeeeeee.
Usagi /picks herself up. "What's embarrassing about that? But to whom—?"
Rei /quickly. "¿You're marrying Mamoru, right?"
Usagi /blushes. "…er, I dunno. Why, do you think there's anyone else around here who'd be interested?"
Rei: "You know, you should study harder to make him proud."
Usagi: "Ami paid you off, didn't she?"
Rei: "I gotta go. Keep smiling, chica."
Usagi: "And you, you monster, you."
Rei: :D
Usagi: :D



But, Little Did They Know…
…that at the precise moment, the Daimon Egg was infecting a tree upon the grounds of the Hikawa Shrine.

SCENE: Hikawa Shrine.
Rei: "Hoop de doo, doop de do, walkin' home, walkin' up the stairs, doop do do…"
Rei: "¡I SENSE EVIL!"
Rei: "…"
Rei: "…Wait, no, I don't."
Rei: "Must just be my imagination."
Rei: "Because it usually is, after all. Just my imagination."
Rei: "¿Was that tree always glowing?"
Rei: "Just my imagination."



Back to Usagi
SCENE: Usagi, still moping.

Usagi /looks up at the sky. "Fate, I think I've finally figured you out. Reverse psychology! 'I sure hope I meet Mamoru soon! I'd love to show him my test!'"
Mamoru /materializes. "Sure thing." /takes the test.
Usagi /shakes fist at the sky. "CURSE YOUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!"
Mamoru: "FIVE PERCENT?! You actually did worse than the 'monkey score'? (And what's with some of these questions?)"
Usagi: "I was distracted! I was punch-drunk! I'm already taking remedial courses! SUPER remedial courses! Very difficult ones!"
Mamoru: "Man, do I know how that goes. No problem."
Usagi: "Darling, I knew you'd understand!"
Mamoru: "Yeah, when you're deep in exam prep, any distraction can really throw you off. I guess I can do my bit to help and stop taking you out until you're finished with the grind. Good luck! Call me if I don't call you, 'kay?" /walks away.
Usagi: "…"
Usagi: "…"
Usagi /looks up at sky. "You just had to rub it in, didn't you?"



Meanwhile, Rei Hino Went About Her Afternoon, Completely Unaware of the Horrors That Were In Store For Her
Rei: "…"

SCENE: Hikawa Shrine
Rei meditates intensely before the sacred flames, but receives nothing but glimpses of That Dream again. Finally, she gives up, and walks back into the daylight.

Rei: "Either something's blocking me, or it really is just a dream and I just can't focus. I didn't sense anyone out there, so I guess I'm just having a mild bout of PTSD after the strain of those last few battles…"
Rei: "Well. In any case. Just to be sure."
Rei /fishes a prayer strip out of the souvenir shop, and ties it carefully to a certain sacred tree.
Rei /prays. "May they all live happily and free from dangers—"



SUDDENLY!
Tree: "PURE HEART DETECTED. ACQUIRE. ACQUIRE."
Rei /?!?!?!?!

The infected tree mutates! It uproots itself! It writhes its limbs in an unholy semblance of human motion! Eyes and the hideous suggestion of teeth form within its leafy canopy! It takes a few staggering, shambling steps towards Rei, growling and singing and swaying to alien strains!

Rei /awestruck and horrified. "Sweet Mother of—"

And then it morphs into a purple dryad with silly striped head ornaments.

Mikuji, Youma of the Week: "MIKUJI!!!"
Rei: "…"
Rei: "Surely they can do better than that."
Mikuji /?
Rei: "I mean, the outfit is obviously parodying sacred Shinto shrine trappings, but it's just too goofball to really even be offensive. Whoever's running this youma—I know you're out there—try harder."
Mikuji: "I SHALL CONSUME YOUR PURE HEART!"
Rei: "Uh-oh. ¡This one can speak in complete sentences!"
Mikuji: "Heh heh heh. Didn't expect me to be smart, did—"
Rei /is already booking it toward the horizon at best speed.
Mikuji: "—you?"

Kaorinite: "This should be interesting."



COMMERCIAL BREAK
Usagi pirouettes, and the chorus sings, "Sailor Moon Super!" So that's what the S is for, I guess?



Rei On The Run
SCENE: We couldn't find a gravel pit next to the Shrine, so here's the next best thing: a deserted forest clearing.

Rei: (Okay, this is far enough to minimize collateral damage and bystander casualties. Time to open up a can.)

Rei readies her princess wand.
Mikuji uses Lay on Hands on Rei!
Rei is pinioned.
Rei drops her princess wand.
Mikuji drops her hands, leaving them in place.
Mikuji generates new hands.
Rei has received First Bound achievement!
Mikuji is laughing at you.


Rei: "¡I'm not afraid of you, you monster! ¡Do your worst!"
Mikuji: "I shall! I shall… uh… I forget what I'm supposed to do." ^_^'
Kaorinite /pops in. "Daimon Mikuji."
Mikuji /salutes. "MA'AM!"
Kaorinite: "There might be a Talisman hidden in this girl; take her pure heart."
Mikuji: "Ah, yes, of course. Thank you, Ma'am!"
Mikuji /walks up to Rei.
Rei /braces herself.
Mikuji /unbuttons her youma shirt.
Rei: "Er…"

Mikuji uses Dark Star Assault Cleavage upon Rei!

Rei: "WHAT."
Mikuji: "The power of boobs compels you!"
Rei: "¡No! ¡My only weakness!"

Rei feels drained!

Kaorinite: "I'd love to stay and watch you work, but I've got to search for other candidates. Still, it looks you've got things well in hand."
Rei: "¡I SCORN YOU BOTH!"



Quick! Where's Usagi?
SCENE: Usagi and Luna, walking home from school.

Usagi: "Where'd you come from?"
Luna: "Just in case someone was thinking about skipping the study session to go on a date with her magic boyfriend."
Usagi: "As a matter of fact, I was, so you just tell the others—"
Luna /flexes her claws. "—that Usagi couldn't make it because she volunteered for another judo demonstration."
Usagi: "…I've gotten better since then."
Luna /smiles.
Usagi: "Welp! Those books won't study themselves! Let's go study!"

A piercing scream comes from the nearby trees, accompanied by dismay of angry crows.

Usagi: "Either Ami has gotten scary strict, or Rei's in trouble. QUICK!"
Usagi /runs over there.
Usagi /wtf
Usagi: "Check this for me: Are you also seeing a youma flashing her tits at Rei?"
Luna: "Something like that. Better go active."


STARKLY CORUSCANT TRANSFORMATION SEQUENCE COUNTER
  • Usagi into:
    • Sailor Moon: 43
    • Second Stage Sailor Moon: 30
    • Princess Serenity: 1
    • Disguise Form: 9
  • Ami into:
    • Sailor Mercury: 15
    • Second Stage Sailor Mercury: 11
  • Rei into:
    • Sailor Mars: 13
    • Second Stage Sailor Mars: 10
  • Makoto into:
    • Sailor Jupiter: 8
    • Second Stage Sailor Jupiter: 10
  • Minako into:
    • Sailor Venus: 7
    • Second Stage Sailor Venus: 11
  • Mamoru into:
    • Tuxedo Mask: 2
    • Second Stage Tuxedo Mask: 1
  • Luna-P into Something-or-Other: 10



Battle is Joined!
Mikuji: "GIVE TO ME YOUR PURE HEART!"
Rei: "Noooooooooo…"
Usagi: "Am I interrupting anything?"
Mikuji /!
Usagi: "I AM THE TERROR WHO TRIPS IN THE NIGHT! I am the brassiere too tight for the bosom of Crime and Injustice!"
Rei: "¿The hell?"
Usagi: "They're right there! It's distracting! HOW DARE YOU TEMPT FAIR EARTHLING MAIDENS WITH YOUR SAUCY EXTRADIMENSIONAL WAYS! For Love, Justice, and Modest Dress Codes—I am Sailor Moon! And in the name of the Moon, I WILL PUNISH YOU!"

Mikuji uses Hair Snare on Usagi!
Usagi is grappled.
Mikuji throws Usagi!
Usagi is free.
Usagi is hurt.


Rei: "¡GREAT SAVE!"
Usagi: "Sorry!"
Rei: "¡LESS TALKING, MORE THUMPING!"



ENTER Makoto, Minako, and Ami.

Makoto /wtf
Mina: "…Wow."
Rei: "¡Look out, it's fast!"
Usagi: "Like that plant spider last year!"
Ami: "Right! Let's—"

Mikuji uses Tangle Seeds, area spread!
Makoto is pinioned.
Minako is pinioned.
Ami is pinioned.


Artemis: "SUCH POWER!"
Luna: "The Scouter's off the scale!"
Ami: "And I was wearing my lucky Han Solo vest, too…" :(
Mikuji: "SO MANY DISTRACTIONS! JEEZ! What else could go wrong?!"
Usagi: "YES! She said it!"



SUDDENLY!
ENTER Tuxedo Mask, dramatically, armed with +4 blessed throwing roses.

Mamoru: "Skill bonus grants +1!"

MAMORU > AGGRESS > Targeted Rose.
Mamoru throws rose at Mikuji!
Mikuji is struck in the hairstyle!
Mikuji is confused.


Mikuji: "GET IT OUT! GET IT OUT OF MY HAIR!"
Mamoru: "Ruffian who creates a storm of riots in the warm sun of spring! Retreat now!"

Mikuji seems clear-headed.

Mamoru: "Frell! GO! GO!"
Usagi: "Too fast!"

USAGI > ADVANCED RITUALISM > Moon Princess Halation
Usagi halates Mikuji stringently.
Reaction move: Mikuji casts Very Bad Triangle!
Your spell is broken!


Usagi: "WHAT?!"
Ami: "WHAT?!"
Rei: "¡¿QUE?!"
Mako: "WHAT?!"
Mina: "WHAT?!"
Mamoru: "WHAT?!"
Luna: "WHAT?!"
Artemis: "Oh, shit."

Mikuji declares today The Most Unlucky Day.
Everyone feels unfortunate.
Mikuji tackles Usagi!
Usagi is hurt.
Usagi is grappled.
Mikuji uses Laying on Hands on Usagi!
Usagi is pinioned.
Mikuji drops her hands, leaving them in place.
Mikuji generates new hands.


Usagi: "AM I GOING TO GET A TURN AT SOME POINT IN THE NEAR FUTURE?!"
Mikuji /dusts herself off. "Talking is no longer a free action."

Mikuji uses Biting Remark on Usagi!
Usagi's Moon Prism Brooch is damaged!
Mikuji drops her mouth, leaving it in place.
Mikuji generates a new mouth.
Moon Prism Brooch automated defense system… fails.
Usagi's Moon Prism Brooch is removed!
Usagi feels less powerful.
Usagi's uniform falls off.


Usagi: "GAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!"
Rei: "¡THIEF! ¡PERVERT! ¡MOLESTER!"
Mamo /boggles.
Artemis: "Note to self: try to change that failure mode."

Usagi's street clothes return.
Mikuji uses Tangle Seeds on Mamoru!
Mamoru is pinioned.


Luna: "…Feeling lucky?"
Artemis: "Not particularly."
Luna: "Fuck it."

LUNA > TEAM AGGRESS : Cat Scratch Fever
Luna and Artemis: your powers combine!
Luna and Artemis scratch Mikuji.
Mikuji scoffs at your pitiful blows!
Mikuji grabs at Luna and Artemis.
Luna and Artemis is grabbed!
Mikuji throws Luna and Artemis.
Luna and Artemis is badly hurt!
Luna and Artemis is down!
Luna and Artemis: your powers aren't combined any more.


Usagi: "I really hate scripted battles."



Battle Lost!
Mikuji: "ANYONE ELSE?!"
Mikuji: "…All right, then. Back to work."
Usagi: "CHEATER! PERVERT! BASHI-BAZOUK!"

Mikuji uses Dark Star Assault Cleavage upon Rei!
Rei feels drained.
Rei feels tired.
Rei feels cold.


Usagi /struggles at her bonds. "LET 'ER GO! This isn't funny anymore!"

Rei feels very drained.
Rei feels very tired.
Rei feels very cold.


Rei: "..."
Rei: ".."
Rei: "."
Usagi: "NO!"

Rei is down!
Rei appears to have lost her soul.


Mikuji /buttons up.
Usagi: "Rei!"
Rei /dribbles, slightly.
Usagi /starts to cry.
Mikuji /picks up the captured crystalline soul. "Hmm. This looks promising."
Usagi: "GIVE THAT BACK, YOU—!" /sobs. "GIVE REI BACK! Damn it, Rei, why didn't you say something?"

Rei appears to have stopped breathing.



SUDDENLY!
Mikuji: "Humans, such pathe—"

Someone casts Sunbolt 2 on Mikuji!
Someone casts Tidal Crash on Mikuji!
Synergy Effect: Sunny Seas Crash!


Mikuji: "—tic?"

Mikuji is smeared for maximum damage!
Mikuji is extremely hurt!
Mikuji is purple mist!
Mikuji drops Rei's Soul.
All of Mikuji's spells are released!
Sacred tree is restored.
Usagi is freed.
Ami is freed.
Rei is freed.
Makoto is freed.
Minako is freed.
Mamoru is freed.


Usagi: "REIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!" /runs.
Usagi /gets there before anyone else. "Somebody gimme the soul, hurry!"



But Who Are Their Mysterious Benefactors?
Two beskirted women watch the scene from the concealing canopy of a large tree narby. They examine the Soul.

The one: "…This isn't a Talisman."
The other: "Looks like they had the wrong target. A wasted trip."

They throw the Soul back, and disappear into the trees.

Usagi /grabs the captured soul and cracks it like an egg.
Usagi /frantically stuffs the soul energy back into Rei's chest.

The color comes back into Rei's face.

Rei /GASP!
Usagi: "REI!"
Rei: "…wha—?"
Usagi /holds Rei close and sobs.
Rei: "…Usagi? …why… you… crying… now?"
Usagi: "I'M CRYING BECAUSE I'M SO HAPPY!"
Rei: "…oh…?"
Usagi: "YOU'RE ALIVE! Do you need anything? Water? Painkiller? A blanket? Does it hurt anywhere? How many fingers am I holding up? Speak to me!"
Rei: "…there's something I'm probably supposed to do right now…but I can't remember what it is…"
Usagi: "Why don't you try hitting me?"
Rei /smiles.

Luna /sniffs the tree where the Mysterious Benefactors had stood.
Artemis /eyebrow?
Luna /significant glance.
Artemis /frowns.



And So, Back in the Lab
Victor Von Eyeglasses: "Hmm. A false positive, you say? And a little dense. Ah, well, back to the drawing board!"
Kaorinite: "We also had an unexpected interruption. I'd better keep a close eye on future ops."



Denouement
Artemis: "So, what have we learned?"
Luna: "The enemy is after the energy of people with pure hearts."
Rei: "Apparently I'm pure, but not that pure."
Usagi: "No surprise there."
Rei: "Says the girl who stuck her chilly hands down my shirt."
Usagi: "I was saving your soul!"
Mina: "Yes, soul energy again, and something about 'Talismans.' They don't know who's got them. I wonder if it's like the Silver Crystal?"
Mamoru: "There are two factions involved. One of them definitely hostile, one of them unknown."
Ami: "And both factions are far more powerful than we are. We need to level up, quickly."
Mina: "Same sorts of monsters, though."
Mako: "Also, tits."
Ami: "I beg your pardon?"
Usagi: "Yeah, is it just me, or is the opposition a little more buxom than before?"
Mina: "I have no idea to what you are referring."
Ami: "Well, you see, Usagi, you're reaching an age when a girl starts to notice certain things—"
Mako: "Did you see the red one and her youma? Criminy! Makes me feel small."
Rei: "'Well in hand.' I mentioned she said that, right? Sheesh. Talk about rubbing it in. …Oh, hell, I did not just say that."
Usagi: "You might say she was just trying to stay abreast of the situation!"
Rei /twitch.
Mina: "Well, hey, you've gotta make sure to keep a youma like that on the bounce!"
Rei /twitch twitch.
Mako: "They've got awfully short mammaries."
Ami: "You need to make certain that they cleave closely to their targets."
Mina: "Oo, good obscure one."
Rei /smokes slightly.
Mina: "Uh-oh, watch out. It looks like the next punster, Rei will knock 'er about!"
Rei /smiles. "…Now would I do a thing like that to my bosom buddies?"
Ami: "And thus does Rei Hino make boobs of us all."
Luna: "Can we stop talking about breasts? I think your Mamoru is blushing."
Artemis: "I've never understood this human obsession…"
Luna: "Enough."
Usagi: "You can exit dramatically now, honey, we're done here."
Mamoru: "See you next week…" /swirls cape.
Usagi: "And so a new battle is about to begin. Craaaaaap!"
Ami: "Well, let's get inside, people."
Mina: "Strategy session?"
Ami: "Yes, for your exams. The Moon never sleeps!"
Usagi: "Nooooooooooooo have mercy…"
 

Shadowjack

Cartoon Poet
RPGnet Member
Validated User
Because of dramatic color of the scene, and the shift in animation styles, I couldn't tell if Rei was Rei or not until the start of her second scene. Also, whenever I hear Usagi voice the trailers now, I keep expecting her to add, "…and lots more fan service for you!" :D

The first scene was actually written as a brainstorming exercise ages ago, but after seeing the episode, I realize it fit awfully well here.

For the curious, they started with red box D&D, but are now playing AD&D 2nd Edition, with the loose-leaf Monstrous Compendium. Rei runs strictly by the book, and dislikes expansion material, though they argued her successfully into accepting psionics again. (Ami: "It's not a good role-playing game if you can't model yourself!") Mina is a lot more free-form when she GMs, but ever since "the Village of Hommlet incident," they don't let Mina run D&D, and so her new Rules Cyclopedia goes sadly unused. On nights when Rei is busy, though, Mina will run Boot Hill straight, or a Gamma World campaign that the others aren't sure if it's supposed to be over-the-top hilarious or subtly disturbing, because it's both. Ami dearly wants to GM some day but never has time to prep. I suspect it's not long, though, before a certain black cover with a red rose catches her eye…

Current character roster: Mina runs a very Vancian Wizard. Mako runs a Ranger named "Lita, Lady of the Woods", and endlessly complains about the changes to the character class since earlier editions. Usagi runs a Fighter, a gay stripper ninja barbarian who bears a suspicious resemblance to Mamoru, but everyone's too polite to point this out. Ami used to run a Paladin of Pelor, but she's been running a Thief lately and having a blast. Yamandakka has a Cleric of Ehlenestra; she picks her spells seemingly at random, but the dice seem to love her. Occasionally Rei lets Yuichiro run a Bard, and Mamoru doesn't play. Yet.
 

JohnBiles

Registered User
Validated User
Re: Episode #90: Premonition of the World's End? Mysterious New Soldiers.

Because of dramatic color of the scene, and the shift in animation styles, I couldn't tell if Rei was Rei or not until the start of her second scene. Also, whenever I hear Usagi voice the trailers now, I keep expecting her to add, "…and lots more fan service for you!" :D
Hehe.



The first scene was actually written as a brainstorming exercise ages ago, but after seeing the episode, I realize it fit awfully well here.

For the curious, they started with red box D&D, but are now playing AD&D 2nd Edition, with the loose-leaf Monstrous Compendium. Rei runs strictly by the book, and dislikes expansion material, though they argued her successfully into accepting psionics again. (Ami: "It's not a good role-playing game if you can't model yourself!") Mina is a lot more free-form when she GMs, but ever since "the Village of Hommlet incident," they don't let Mina run D&D, and so her new Rules Cyclopedia goes sadly unused. On nights when Rei is busy, though, Mina will run Boot Hill straight, or a Gamma World campaign that the others aren't sure if it's supposed to be over-the-top hilarious or subtly disturbing, because it's both. Ami dearly wants to GM some day but never has time to prep. I suspect it's not long, though, before a certain black cover with a red rose catches her eye…

Current character roster: Mina runs a very Vancian Wizard. Mako runs a Ranger named "Lita, Lady of the Woods", and endlessly complains about the changes to the character class since earlier editions. Usagi runs a Fighter, a gay stripper ninja barbarian who bears a suspicious resemblance to Mamoru, but everyone's too polite to point this out. Ami used to run a Paladin of Pelor, but she's been running a Thief lately and having a blast. Yamandakka has a Cleric of Ehlenestra; she picks her spells seemingly at random, but the dice seem to love her. Occasionally Rei lets Yuichiro run a Bard, and Mamoru doesn't play. Yet.
Heh. I have a half-finished story where the Senshi play Keep on the Borderlands (Umino is the DM).

And I recognized the spelljammer jokes. Hehe.




Mina /to Ami. "…What kind of books?"
Rei: :mad: "ROCKS FALL. EVERYONE DIES."
Mako: "We're in space! There's no up for rocks to fall down from!"
Rei: "¡Suddenly, illithids!"
Mako: "Gaaaahhhhh—"
Mina /indignant outrage. "Dude, I had my psionics detector—"
Rei: "¡They had a cloaking device! ¡Roll for initiative!"
Mina: "Screw you, Rei!" /rolls. "Eight!"
Ami /rolls. "FIVE! All hands to battle stations!"
Usagi: "(Thank you, Rei.) Somebody save my hamster!"
I had a DM who was like this all the time, though his trigger was every time I had a date, when I came back, he'd get jealous and terrible things would happen.

The first time I was late due to a date, my character was being held hostage by an evil jester. The second time, the party had tea with goblins and I got back and we'd all been dumped naked down a mine shaft and the barbarian put me in a bag and used me as a club. The third time, we accidentally plane-shifted into Gehenna after a suicidal Red Dragon rode our spelljammer to the bottom of the ocean. And the third time, I got home from the date and discovered I had been volunteered to have a footrace with a dozen angry liches down a mountainside because I had stolen their soul objects and the rest of the party was stuck in the Abyss fighting their minions.





Just in case you don't know, Ikuhara is the director of this season. (He would go on to do Utena)

Usagi: "Just in case, you know, you've been having confused, prophetic dreams of the future, and are thinking that the best approach is to say nothing to nobody and then break off our relationship without any warning or explanation and screw around for several weeks trying to solve the problem yourself, when actually a few words to the wise could have escaped a whole lot of heartbreak for all concerned. Because if we can't learn from our pasts, what can we learn from?"
Rei: "¡Ha ha ha ha! ¡Ha ha! …Um."
Usagi: "So, I say again: What up, Rei?"
Rei /Subject Changing Prana. "¿What are your plans for the future?"
Usagi: "OH BOY LET'S TALK ABOUT OUR FUTURES LOL I see through you."
Hehe. If only people did learn!



Ami: "And I was wearing my lucky Han Solo vest, too…" :(
Ami in vest = win.

I have never seen it as 'Kaorinite' instead of 'Kaolinite'

Awesome as always, Shadowjack.
 
Top Bottom