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[IWIW] Sailor Moon R (thread 4 of a continuing series)

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ANT Pogo

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Re: Just a Minor Update: Interviews with Takeuchi and seiyuu

"Is Mercury gonna have to kill a bitch?"
It's no surprise that Aya Hisakawa's other roles include Arisa, the comedically violent gun-toting Office Lady in "All Purpose Cat Girl Nuku Nuku", as well as action-girl Haruka Shitow (an expy of Kotono "Sailor Moon" Mitsuishi's Misato Katsuragi) in RahXephon.

She also, amusingly, got to be both cute AND rough-talking as the Kansai-accented cute lil' Cerebus Kero-chan, from Cardcaptor Sakura.

She reminds me a bit of Yuko Goto, another voice actress known for cute, ostensibly meek girl roles in anime, and who in real life is a bit of a rough-and-tumble biker chick (something lampshaded in Lucky Star).

l love voice actor trivia...
 

Knightsky

Making wizards funky again
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Great recap, Shadowjack!

I especially like your version of Minako. In the actual show she often comes off as a slightly ditzier clone of Usagi (for all the obvious reasons, I guess). Your Minako seems to be 'the one who sees', so to speak - picking up on the stuff that others may have missed. Whether it's her forceful rebuke to Rei's blind acceptance of visions and destiny ("Man, fuck fate!"), or her more gentle prodding of getting Ami back on track, this is a Sailor Venus I can really get behind, one who has her own place in the team, and doesn't feel like a fifth wheel.
 

nargun

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Re: Just a Minor Update: Interviews with Takeuchi and seiyuu

It's no surprise that Aya Hisakawa's other roles include Arisa, the comedically violent gun-toting Office Lady in "All Purpose Cat Girl Nuku Nuku", as well as action-girl Haruka Shitow (an expy of Kotono "Sailor Moon" Mitsuishi's Misato Katsuragi) in RahXephon.

She also, amusingly, got to be both cute AND rough-talking as the Kansai-accented cute lil' Cerebus Kero-chan, from Cardcaptor Sakura.
... Nakajima Youko.

"honma ni ee ka, keiki-han? ou ni naru-tchu no ni, uchi jishin nai ya de".
 

Shadowjack

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... you really must permit me to be cut to pieces on your behalf sometime.

Chris Davies.
That is perhaps the most interesting compliment I have ever received.

I'll just file that away as an IOU, shall I? :)
 

Shadowjack

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RPGnet Member
Validated User
Side Story: Legend of the Dark Kingdom's Resurrection (Post 1 of 3)

Usagi: "'Side Story'?"
Ami: "It means that this episode is non-canonical."
Minako: "If that means anything."
Makoto: "So nothing we do in this one has any impact upon the real storyline?"
Ami: "Exactly."
Rei: "AWESOME."
Rei /kills Usagi.
Rei /makes out with Minako.
Rei /steals Makoto's wallet.
Rei /runs away, giggling.
Ami: "…That was unexpected."
Minako /gasp! "But not entirely unpleasant!"
Makoto: "Speak for yourself."
Usagi /stinks up the room a bit.



NOTES
I've placed the track listings at the end of the 3rd post, in case you wish to cue them up ahead of time instead of trying to guess.



BLACK SCREEN
Producer credits. Director credits. Crowd noises.

FADE UP: In their costumes, the cast leaves the dressing room, heading for the stage.

Usagi: "Well, we've kept 'em waiting long enough. Let's do it to them! Come on, Minako!"
Rei: "Let's go, guys!"
Usagi: "Let's rock and roll! ROCK AND ROLL!"
Ami: "YEAH!"
Minako: "Gonna be a hot one, innit?"
Makoto: "It's going to be a great show."

A few minutes later.

Usagi: "No, that's not an exit."
Minako: "We don't want an exit."
Usagi: "No, that's… true—"
Minako: "Try this way."
Rei: "I hope so."

A few minutes later.

Makoto: "We're in the group. We're in the group that's playing tonight."
Janitor: "You go right straight through this door here, down the hall—"
Usagi: "Yeah."
Janitor: "—turn right—"
Usagi: "Yeah."
Janitor: "—and then there's a little jog there, about thirty feet."
Usagi: "A jog?"
Janitor: "—jog to the left."
Usagi: "A jog?"
Rei: "We don't have time for that."

A few minutes later.

Ami: "Hello, Cleveland! Hello— oh—"
Usagi: "FUCK!"
Janitor: "You must've made a wrong turn."
Minako: "Other way. Other way."



NARRATION
Usagi and her friends plan a fun summer vacation. Before these five appear four handsome young men… but their faces resemble those of an enemy from a long ago battle. Now, once again, the Dark Kingdom's nightmare has been resurrected…



A DARKENED STAGE
Everyone: ♫ Heeeeeeeeeere we are… born to be Queens: each a Princess of the UUUUUUniverse! Here we belong— ♫

Drumbeat. Spotlight on Sailor Moon.

Usagi: ♫ —fighting to survive, in a war with the darkest power… ♫
Usagi: "YEAH!"

LIGHTS EXPLODE. All five Senshi revealed. Rockin' guitar licks.

Usagi: ♫ AND HERE WE ARE! Princesses of the Universe! Here we belong— ♫
Everyone: ♫ —fighting for survival! ♫
Usagi: ♫ We've got to be defenders of you allllll! ♫
Chorus: ♫ Oooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhh. ♫
Usagi: ♫ I am immortal—I have inside me blood of queens— ♫
Rei: "¡Yeah!"
Usagi: ♫ I have no rival—no man can be my equal! Take me to the future of you all! ♫
Fireworks.
Usagi: ♫ Born to be Queen—Princess of the Universe—fighting and free, got your world in my hand, I'm here for your love and I'll make my stand! ♫
Everyone: ♫ She was born to be Princess of the Universe! ♫
Usagi: ♫ No man could understand: my power is in my own hand! ♫
Chorus: ♫ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, people talk about you, people say, 'You've had your day—' ♫
Usagi: ♫ I'm a girl that will go far: fly the Moon and reach for the stars, with my wand and head held high, got to pass the test first time! Yeeeaaaah. I know that people talk about me—I hear it every day—but I can prove them wrong, 'cause I'm right— ♫
Everyone: ♫ —first tiiiiime! ♫
Usagi: "Yeah! Yeah!"
Drum solo leads into musical interlude.
Usagi: "All right, let's go! Let's go! HA HA!"
Minako /rockin' guitar solo.
Usagi: "Yeah! Watch this girl fly! Woot! Bring on the girls! C'mon, c'mon, c'mon!"
Everyone: ♫ Heeeeeeere we arrrrre— ♫
Usagi: "Here we are!"
Everyone: ♫ Born to be Queens, each a Princess of the UUUUUniverse! Here we belong— ♫
Usagi: ♫ —born to be Queens, Princesses of the Universe, fighting and free, got your world in our hands, we're here for your love and we'll make our stand— ♫
Everyone: ♫ We were born to be Princess of the Universe… ♫



SUDDENLY!
Rei: "¡I sense EVIL!"
A Mysterious Voice /ho ho ho.
Usagi: "…I know that laugh."
Ami /gasps! "Those are Beryl's minions. But they were destroyed! How can this be?"
Queen Beryl: (voice over) "The energy of hatred has resurrected me again! So long as people in this world have hate in their hearts… I shall return again and again. Let the new dark world begin!"

Enter Beryl, dramatically, followed by the Four Generals.

Usagi: "NO FAIR! I distinctly remember disintegrating you with the power of love!"
Queen Beryl: "I cheated. You're surprised?"
Usagi: "DISINTEGRATED! I mean, love-powered nuke, point-blank!"
Queen Beryl: "All nukes do are make me come back radioactive. Like SO!"

<< Queen Beryl casts Gamma Ray! >>
< Usagi is hurt! >
< Ami is hurt! >
< Rei is hurt! >
< Minako is hurt! >
< Makoto is hurt! >

Queen Beryl /slinks over to Usagi.
Usagi /twitch twitch.
Queen Beryl /sits on Usagi and starts filing her nails. "You five girls—you do know you've inspired some powerful grudges in us?"
Usagi /aaaaaaaaaagh.
Kunzite: "I hate you all."
Zoisite: "More vocabulary, dear."
Kunzite: "You're all totally bogus."
Zoisite /decides to just let it go. "Yes, and we'll massacre you all!"
Nephrite: "And then we'll do whatever we like with the world—"
Jadeite: "And with the power of the Silver Crystal in our hands—"
Queen Beryl: "The whole world—no, the WHOLE UNIVERSE will be covered in darkness!"
Usagi: "…what, 80% dark matter isn't enough for you?"
Queen Beryl: "I'm a completist. It's one of my crafty little character flaws."
Usagi: "GET OFF OF ME!"
Queen Beryl: "No."
Usagi: "My friends and I didn't die for world peace so you could kill us! Wait, what I meant to say was…"
Queen Beryl: "Beep beep."
Usagi: "What?"
Queen Beryl: "Beep beep."
Usagi: "Why are you making alarm clock noises? …Oh."

Alarm Clock /beep beep.
Usagi /wakes up.
Usagi /is weighted down by a cat.
Usagi: "…LUNA, GET OFF OF ME!"
Luna /!



•*SHORTLY THEREAFTER, IN THE REAL WORLD
Luna /frantic frantic frantic frantic. "ARTEMIIIIIIIISSSSS!"
Artemis /zzzzzzzzzzz
Luna /cat bite
Artemis: "GAH! What?!"
Luna: "Why are you wasting your time there?!"
Artemis: "A catnap is never a waste of time, my dear." /stretch, preen. "What seems to be the issue?"
Luna: "BERYL'S BACK!"
Artemis: "…Good Lord. How? Where?"
Luna: "She appeared in Usagi's dream last night—"
Artemis: "—and Usagi's dreams always come true." /examines script. "Wait, they do?"
Luna: (sotto voce) "Ix-nay, ix-nay."
Artemis: "Ahem! Sorry."
Luna: "We have to warn the team!"
Artemis: "Righto!"



A DEPARTMENT STORE, THE BATHING SUIT SECTION
Rei: "¡ZOMG ZOMG ZOMG look at all the HAWT bathing suits!"
Minako: "I want to try them all on."
Ami: "We are not doing one of those MGM costume segments."
Minako: ♫ Beautiful girl, you're a lovely picture; beautiful girl… ♫
Ami: "I said no."
Rei: "¡Makoto, help us out, here!"
Makoto /Subject Changing Prana. "Well, which one do you think you'll look best in?"
Rei: "Being naturally beautiful, I of course will look equally good in any of them."
Everyone: "Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight."

Usagi /stumbles in, yawning.
Rei: "¡Late again, as usual!"
Usagi /yawn.
Rei: "Methinks she is ignoring us."
Minako: "Or unaware of us."
Rei: "¡USAGI WAKE UP!"
Usagi /yawn.
Rei: "My way isn't working."
Ami: "Mako, wake her up your way."
Makoto: "Right! …Which way's my way?"
Ami: "Pick her up and dunk her head in the water fountain until she reacts."
Makoto: "…My way's not very sporting." /picks up Usagi and dunks her head in the water fountain.
Usagi /splutters. "I'M AWAKE! I'M AWAKE! …We're in trouble! BERYL'S BACK!"
Everyone else: "WHAT?! How?! Where?! When?!"
Usagi: "See, I had this dream—"
Everyone else /relaxes.
Makoto: "Too much late night homework, Usagi."
Usagi: "…You're probably right! I shouldn't have panicked. I mean, I get weird dreams all the time, but not all the weird characters that show up will just walk out and into my life."
Ms. Haruna /saunters in. "Hi, everybody!"
Everybody: "Hi, Ms. Haruna!"

Ms. Haruna: "I had a great idea! How about I take you all on a summer vacation to Brazil?"
Ami: "WHAT."
Rei: "¿You mean, right now, this instant?"
Usagi: "Sensei, are you drunk?"
Minako: "Did your sister put you up to this to get to me?"
Makoto: "Dude, don't ask questions when she's offering free tickets."



CUE MUSICAL NUMBER
Ms. Haruna: "Have you ever been to Baía, girls?"
Girls: "No?"
Ms. Haruna: "No? Well, let's go! If you go to Baía, my friends, you'll never return!"
Ms. Haruna: ♫ E muita sorte teve, e muita sorte tem, e muita sorte tera! Have you been to Baía, girls? ♫
Girls: "No!"
Ms. Haruna: ♫ Well, let's go! They have vatapa— ♫
Usagi: "What's that?"
Ms. Haruna: ♫ —they have carvru— ♫
Makoto: "Is that so?"
Ms. Haruna: ♫ —they have munguza— ♫
Minako: "Munguza?"
Ms. Haruna: ♫ Do you like to samba?
Rei: "¡Oh, sure!"

A dance breaks out.

Ms. Haruna: ♫ Nas sacadas dos sobrados / De velha sao salvador / A lembranca dos donzelas / do tempo do imperador. / Tudo, tudo na Baía / faz a gentle querer bem / A Baía tem um jeito que / nenhuma terra tem.

Rei /breaks free of the dance and steps aside. "There's something fishy going on here…"

Everyone else keeps dancing.

Ms. Haruna: ♫ Dodododododo— Have you been to Baía, girls?"
Girls: "No!"
Ms. Haruna: ♫ Well, let's go! When you go to Baía, my friends, you'll never return! E muita sorte teve, e muita sorte tem, e muita sorte tera—
Rei /accusing finger. "¡EVIL! ¡EVIL PURE AND SIMPLE FROM THE DARK DIMENSION!"



RECORD SCRATCH
Minako: "Dude, it's Ms. Haruna. Chill."
Usagi: "Yeah, I mean, she's not even your teacher. Harsh, maybe, but evil—?"
Rei: "I'm telling you she's a DEMON. Right there! There! Those tickets probably read Ackbar's Discount Airlines, and the plane will explode before we even—"
Ms. Haruna /starts to cry.
Minako /pats Ms. Haruna on the back. "There, there, dear, Rei didn't mean it."
Rei /patiently. "Guys, you recruited someone with Detect Evil, maybe you should— Okay, look, I'll just prove it."
<< Rei : Cast > Exorcism : Ms. Haruna >>

Ms. Haruna /!
Ms. Haruna /wigs out!
Ms. Haruna /shivers and shudders and jumps.
Ms. Haruna /head twists around.
Ms. Haruna is revealed to have been a cleverly-disguised Evil Mannequin!
Usagi /bows. "Rei, I apologize."
Rei: "¡Apology accepted!"
Makoto: "Let's kick the monster's ass!"



BATTLE IS JOINED
Dozens more Evil Mannequins file into the room and menace the team.
Rei: "¿What is this, a tour group from Hell?"
Mannequin Leader: "Destroy them, my squaddies! Oh, and drain their energy, too."
Mannequin Biggles: "Should we drain them first, or, uh—?"
Mannequin Leader: "We've gone over this before, drain then destroy! Drain then destroy!"
Mannequin Fang: "But you didn't say—"
Usagi /bolts for the door.
<< Mannequin Leader casts Tanglefoot! >>
Usagi /trips.
Rei: "¿Was that your idea of a 'strategic retreat', or were you just abandoning us?"
Usagi: "They look like giant bugs! I hate giant bugs!"
Mannequin Leader: "Your beautiful hatred gives us strength!"
Usagi: "Frell."

Makoto: "Enough talk! JUPITER POWER M—"
<< Mannequin Leader casts Irritation! >>
< Makoto receives Sneezing Status! >
Makoto /sneezes.
Minako: "VENUS POW—"
<< Mannequin Leader casts Irritation! >>
< Minako receives Starving Status! >
Minako: "sooooooo hungryyyyyyyy… blood sugar lowwwwww…"
Ami: "Shit, they know our weakness! MERCURY—"
<< Mannequin Leader casts Irritation! >>
< Ami receives Confused Status! >
Ami /confusedly. "—um… what was I going to say?"
Rei /really fast. "MARSPOWERMAKE—"
<< Mannequin Leader casts Irritation! >>
< Rei receives Pain Status! >
Rei: "AAAAAAAA cramps cramps nooooo…"

The Mannequins take the groaning girls prisoner.

Mannequin Leader: "NOW you three!"
Mannequin Fang: "Five, sir!"
Mannequin Leader: "Five! You have one last chance—either perish here and now, or—"

Dramatic chord (shrubbery)!

Mannequin Leader: "—tell us where the Silver Crystal is!"

Beat.

Makoto /sneezes.
Ami /confusedly. "I'm sorry, what was the question? …Did I ask that already?"
Minako /moans.
Rei /groans.
Usagi: "NEVER!"
Mannequin Leader: "VERY WELL!"

The Mannequins start slapping the girls around.

Mannequin Leader: "Confess! Confess! Confess! CONFESS!"
Mannequin Biggles: "I confess!"
Mannequin Leader: "Not you."



SUDDENLY!
Enter Tuxedo Mask, dramatically, armed with +3 blessed throwing roses.
Mamoru: "Musick has Charms to sooth a savage Breast, to soften Rocks, or bend a knotted Oak. I've read, that things inanimate have mov'd, and, as with living Souls, have been inform'd, by Magick Numbers and persuasive Sound."
Mannequin Leader: "Oh, bugger, it's Tuxedo Mask."

Music swells up.

Mamoru: ♫ Hold me close and hold me fast; the magic spell you cast, this is la vie en rose. When you kiss me, Heaven sighs, and though I close my eyes, I see la vie en rose. When you press me to your heart, I'm in a world apart, a world where roses bloom—and when you speak, angels sing from above; every day words seems to turn into love songs. Give your heart and soul to me, and life will always be la vie en rose. ♫

Mannequins start dancing.

Mannequin Leader: "No! Don't listen to him! Stop that dancing!"

…but they don't stop, and finally even the leader gets dragged in. Meanwhile, the spells upon the girls are removed.

Mamoru /looks upon the dance choreography with approval.
Usagi /gazes upon him adoringly.

Mamoru: ♫ I thought that love was just a word they sang about in songs I heard. It took your kisses to reveal that I was wrong, and love is real. Sooooooo… Hold me close and hold me fast; the magic spell you cast, this is la vie en rose. When you kiss me, Heaven sighs, and though I close my eyes, I see la vie en rose. When you press me to your heart, I'm in a world apart, a world where roses bloom—and when you speak, angels sing from above; every day words seems to turn into love songs. Give your heart and soul to me, and life will always be la vie en rose. ♫

The Mannequins dance away, leaving our heroes alone. Exit Tuxedo Mask, dramatically, with swirl of cape.

Usagi: "…awwwww." :(



AND AS THE MUSIC FADES…
Luna /bursts in. "EVERYONE! EVERYONE! Usagi's dream was real! Beryl and her minions have returned!"
Usagi: "…We noticed."
Artemis: "We must quickly prepare for this new battle—"
Usagi /twitterpated. "Tuxedo Mask…"
Artemis: "Not now."
Luna: "Usagi, focus! Try to remember!"
Artemis: "Maybe if we recap our pasts to her? Work her back to the present?"
Luna: "Worth a try. Usagi, remember when he was Endymion—"
Usagi /dreamily. "—Endymion—"
Luna: "—and you were Serenity—"
Usagi /dreamily. "—Serenity—"
Artemis: "Yes! Dreaming of the blue Earth, and you found that wonderful love."
Luna: "Yes, back before the people of the Earth and the people of the Moon were allied. It was… a long time ago."
Artemis: "Yes… the Four Generals were Endymion's kindly bodyguards back then, weren't they? Really long ago. Anyway, Usagi—"
Luna: "Yes, a long time ago. They, too, found love beneath the Moon. …Such a beautiful life, those times."
Artemis: "Uh, Luna?"
Luna: "We can't ever go back, of course."
Artemis: "Luna."
Luna: "Just a memory, now, like a fairytale. A time of romance and…"
Artemis: "Luna, focus. Luna!"
Luna: "What was that song they used to play?"
Artemis: "AAARGH!"



A GAY TIME OF COURTLY ROMANCE
Enter Endymion's shoulder pads, dramatically.
Enter Endymion, somewhat less dramatically, wearing said shoulder pads.
Endymion: "Serenity!"
Enter Serenity, elegantly.
Serenity: "Endymion!"

Bring up the lights to reveal that we're at a court ball!

Endymion: "Madame, you look ravishing tonight! You have made me the happiest of men!"
Serenity: "Your Highness." :)
Together: "Wunderbar!"
Together: ♫ Wunderbar, wunderbar! There's our favorite star above. What a bright, shining star—like our love, it's wunderbar!
Endymion: ♫ Gazing down on the Jungfrau— ♫
Serenity: ♫ —from our secret chalet for two. ♫
Endymion: ♫ Let us drink, Liebchen mein— ♫
Serenity: ♫ —in the moonlight benign— ♫
Together: ♫ —to the joy of our dream come true! Wunderbar, wunderbar—
Endymion: ♫ —what a perfect night for love. ♫
Serenity: ♫ Here am I, and here you are— ♫
Together: ♫ —why it's truly wunderbar! Wunderbar, wunderbar—
Endymion: ♫ We're alone and hand in glove— ♫
Serenity: ♫ Not a cloud near or far— ♫
Endymion: ♫ —why, it's more than wunderbar!"
Serenity: ♫ Say you care, dear. ♫
Endymion: ♫ For you? Madly. ♫
Serenity: ♫ Say you long, dear. ♫
Endymion: ♫ For your kiss. ♫
Serenity: ♫ Do you swear, dear? ♫
Endymion: ♫ Darling, gladly! ♫
Serenity: ♫ Life's divine, dear! ♫
Endymion: ♫ And you're mine, dear! ♫
Together: ♫ Wunderbar, wunderbar—
Endymion: ♫ There's our favorite star above— ♫
Together: ♫ —what a bright, shining star! Like our love, it's wunderbar!

They waltz, tra-la-la-ing. As they dance, other dancers enter—the Sailor Senshi, and the Four Generals, smiling and happy.

Together: ♫ Wunderbar, wunderbar! There's our favorite star above; what a bright, shining star! Like our love, it's wunderbar!

Concealed by his shoulder pads, Endymion steals a tender kiss from Serenity. She is not loathe to grant it. :)



SUDDENLY!
Artemis /bursts in, dramatically! "My lords and ladies! Terrible news!"
Luna /also bursting. "A coup d'etat on Earth!"
Endymion: "What say you?!"
Luna: "Beryl has named herself Queen, and now drives the people of Earth to attack the Moon!"
Artemis: "Earth has already fallen, and now she seeks the Silver Crystal."
Luna: "DOOM HAS COME UPON US ALL!"
Endymion: "And I thought I could take this brief vacation without incident. Everyone!" /he springs gallantly to the door. "Let us face them together!"
Serenity: "O, Endymion!"
The Sailor Senshi: "FORWARD!" /they charge—
Endymion: "…"
Endymion: "We would expect our loyal bodyguards to be beside us when we charge into battle."
The Four Generals /laugh evilly.
Luna: "Methinks you no longer have loyal bodyguards."
Serenity: "IMPOSSIBLE!"
The Four Generals /secure the doors, preventing escape.
Queen Beryl /strides in, at the head of an army. "That word does not mean what you think it means! None shall stand against us."



LUNA'S RECOLLECTION IS INTERRUPTED
Usagi: "LUNA why would you want me to remember such a horrible past?!" /runs away.
Luna: "…oops."
Artemis: "I'm not sure that was the best tack to take with Miss Tsukino. She tends to repress bad memories."
Luna: "Like homework."
Artemis: "And chores, yes. So you can see that the fall of an entire world kind of goes off the scale."
Luna: "It was your idea."
Artemis: "Sorry about that."
Luna: "What was up with that whole swimsuit-Brazil-mannequin-monsters plot, anyway?"
Artemis: "Wouldn't you say that plots based upon a tenuous interpretation of reality are really the Dark Kingdom's forte?"
Luna: "Point."
Artemis: "On that topic—"
Luna: "—yes, I noticed that we seem to have lost the entire team, somehow."
Artemis /sighs. "Well, they can't have wandered far…"
 

Shadowjack

Cartoon Poet
RPGnet Member
Validated User
Side Story: Legend of the Dark Kingdom's Resurrection (Post 2 of 3)

CUT TO: A PARK NEARBY
Rei: "Well, another demon down, I think we deserve a reward."
Minako: "I think we should hunt down the source so we can sleep easy."
Usagi: "I vote we go to the beach!"
Ami: "I vote we focus on the enemy—"
Usagi: "BEACH! I WANNA GO TO THE BEACH! IT'S SUMMER AND I WANNA GO TO THE BEACH!"
Rei /Subject Changing Prana. "Hey, check out the street performer over there. Nice moves."
Minako: "He's not a street performer, he's a gymnast from the high school near mine, and he comes here to practice all the time."
Rei: "…Someone is blushing." :D
Minako: "Am not." /totally is.
Rei: "¿Is this the mysterious Saito-sempai of which we have heard so much?"
Usagi: "I haven't heard! Who? Who?"
Minako /blushing. "His name's Saito… he's… he works out…"
Makoto: "OH-HO!"
Rei: "¿You like him, right? ¿You gonna confess, right?"
Minako: "N-no…" :eek:
Ami: "Get her!"

They grab her and drag her, struggling, towards Saito. Makoto finally has to throw her at him. Then they all hide behind a park bench, to observe.

Minako /stands up, helps him up. "Sorry! Are you okay?"
Saito /dusts himself off. "I think so… Say! You're Minako Aino from the junior high near mine, aren't you?"
Minako: "…You know my name?"
Saito: "You're famous! Everyone says that you're the cutest in your class!"
Minako /blush visible from orbit.
Saito: "…I bet you get a lot of boys saying stuff like that to you."
Minako: "Boys? No. Not really. I wish."
Saito: "…So… you don't have a special someone…?"
Minako: "Um…" /looks back nervously at her friends for encouragement.
Usagi /holds up big sign that reads, "TELL HIM!" Points at sign. Points at Saito. Repeatedly.
Minako: "…um… there is one guy… I… kind of like…"
Saito /!



MUSIC SWELLS UP
Minako: ♫ The moment I saw his face, I knew he was just my style. My only regret is that we've never met, though I dream of him all the while. But he doesn't know I exist, no matter how I persist, so it's clear to see there's no hope for me, though I live at fifty-one thirty-five Kensington Avenue, and he lives at fifty-one thirty-three… ♫

Saito: "…Hey, that's my number!"

Minako: ♫ How can I ignore the boy next door, I love him more than I can say. Doesn't try to please me, doesn't even tease me, and he never sees me glance his way. And though I'm heartsore, the boy next door affection for me won't display. I just adore him so I can't ignore him, the boy next door… ♫

Saito: "…You know I only train in this park because you hang out here?"
Minako: "REALLY?"
Saito: "You wanna, um, go to the amusement park with me?"
Minako: "YES! YES! I mean, um… aren't you in training for that competition—?"
Saito: "If I date you, I WILL TRAIN TEN TIMES HARDER!"
Rei, Makoto, Ami /rolleyes.
Usagi /does the math. "…That won't leave him a lot of spare time."
Minako: "Okay, let's have fun for today!"
Saito: "YES!"

Minako and Saito walk off, hand in hand.

Usagi: "WOW! How come none of us can get romantic action that quickly?"
Rei: "¿Have you tried?"
Usagi: "Yes! I practically had to handcuff Mamoru…"
Ami: "Kinky."
Makoto: "Let's follow them and watch!"
Ami: "Great idea!"
Rei: "Oh, I'm in. ¡I love watching others in love!"
Usagi: "Speaking of kinky…"
Makoto: "Oh, hush. We have a proprietary interest now! It's our duty to see them through."




AND SO: THE AMUSEMENT PARK
Saito: "So what do you want to do?"
Minako: "I dunno. What do you want to do?"
Saito: "I dunno. Ride the Carousel?"
Minako: "Okay!"

Beat.

Minako: "Ami, Rei, Mako, Usagi, you can come out now."
Ami: "AARRGH!"
Makoto: "How'd you know we were there?"
Rei: "We weren't really following you, following you, it's just that we overheard, and we decided that the park seemed like a good idea, and school's so boring, and, um…"
Ami: "Rei, fibbing doesn't become you."
Rei: "At least I'm trying."
Minako: "No Usagi?"
Makoto: "She muttered something about, 'Our sick voyeuristic tendencies' and 'no need for vicarious watching when our lives are already sufficiently dramatic', then walked off."
Saito: "…So, uh, is this a group date or something?"
Rei /archly. "¿Oh, would you like that?"
Saito: "Well, I've got these three friends on the gymnastics team…"
Minako: "Are they lurking in the bushes, too?"
Saito /nods his head, then whistles.

Three men tumble in.
Student A: "Hello—"
Student B: "—hello—"
Student C: "—hello—"
All three: "Hello!"

Student A: "¡I am Student A!" /approaches Rei. "¡YOU! You are like the flame. ¡Student A like you very much! ¡Passion fruits!"
Rei: "…Passion fruits?"
Student A /sexily. "¡Mangos! ¡Papayas! ¡You ignite an entire fruit salad of desire in my heart!"
Rei: "…What the hell. Talk fruity to me some more, you Latin hunk."

Student B: "I have a strong psychological attraction to intellectual women, due to various complex personal insecurities. I'd do anything within reason, and some things beyond reason, for such a girl."
Ami: "I'm told my IQ is over 300."
Student B /swoons.

Student C: "I like a strong woman."
Makoto: "Well, that's nice, but I'm afraid you just don't push my buttons."
Student C /in His voice. "I can also do impressions."
Makoto: "FUKKIN SOLD."



A DANCE NUMBER BREAKS OUT
Everybody has paired off except…
Usagi /just happens by.
Usagi /boggles.
Usagi: "I leave you people alone for five minutes…"
Saito: "Let's dance, everybody!"

Saito: ♫ Every afternoon when the clock strikes four— ♫
Chorus: ♫ Bop-be-ba, ba-ba-ba-ba, bee-ba! ♫
Saito: ♫ A crazy bunch of kids crash through the door, yeah— ♫
Chorus: ♫ Bop-be-ba, ba-ba-ba-ba, bee-ba! ♫
Saito: ♫ Well they throw off their coats and leave the squares behind, and then they shake it shake it shake it like they're losing their mind; you'll never see them frown 'cause they're the nicest kids in town! So every afternoon we'll get our party on— ♫
Chorus: ♫ Na, na, na, na, na, na-na-na-na… ♫
Saito: ♫ And we really turn the sound up 'cause our parents are gone, yeah— ♫
Chorus: ♫ Na, na, na, na, na, na-na-na-na… ♫
Saito: ♫ And then you twist and shout for your favorite star, and when you've practiced every step that's in your repertoire, you'd better come on down and meet the nicest kids in town! ♫
Usagi /tries to cut in, and fails.
Saito: ♫ Nice clean kids who like to lead the way—if a rainstorm comes we'll tell it— ♫
Chorus: ♫ —GO AWAY! ♫
Saito: ♫ And I'm the guy who keeps it spinnin' round, Saito Sato-sama, with the latest, greatest Minato sound! ♫
Usagi /dances by herself, pathetically.
Saito: ♫ So every afternoon drop everything, woo! ♫
Chorus: ♫ Bop-bee-ba, ba-ba-ba-ba, bee-ba. ♫
Saito: ♫ Who needs to read and write when you can dance and sing? ♫
Chorus: ♫ Bop-bee-ba, ba-ba-ba-ba, bee-ba. ♫
Saito: ♫ Forget about your algebra and calculus; you can always do your homework on the morning bus; can't tell a verb from a noun, but they're the nicest kids in town! ♫
Saito: "Roll call!"

I'm Mina!
A!
Rei!
B!
Mako!
C!
Ami!

Usagi: "And I'm Us—"
Saito: ♫ So if every night you're shaking as you lie in bed— ♫
Chorus: ♫ Pony-pony, ooh, pony-pony. ♫
Saito: ♫ And the bass and drums are pounding in your head— ♫
Chorus: ♫ Mony-mony, ooh, mony-mony. ♫
Saito: ♫ Who cares about sleep when you can snooze in school? They'll never get to college but they sure look cool. Don't need a cap and gown when you're the nicest kids in town— ♫
Chorus: ♫ Nicest kids in town! WOOOOO! ♫

Saito: "Hey, gang, let's check out the astrology booth!"
Ami /throws horns. "Woooo! Astrology! Yeah!"



AND SO USAGI IS LEFT BEHIND
Usagi /crying. "YEAH, JUST OVERLOOK ME, you lucky sods."
Usagi /blows nose, throws tissue over her shoulder.
Mamoru: "EWWWW! Ick! Ick! That's unsanitary!"
Usagi: "Oh, great. The would-be won't-be boyfriend. Why couldn't you have shown up six minutes ago?"
Mamoru: "I would have, if I'd known I was going to get your weird germs in my face now."
Usagi: "I DO NOT HAVE WEIRD GERMS."
Mamoru: "I don't like perfectly ordinary germs in the face, either, Twin-Tails."
Usagi /sits down and mopes.
Mamoru: "…"
Usagi /sniffle.
Mamoru /tenderly dries her tears with his handkerchief.
Usagi /smiles, a little. "…what brought that on?"
Mamoru: "Just… you know. Why are you crying?"
Usagi: "No reason. …I just want to see the ocean."
Mamoru: "Okay, I'll take you."
Usagi: "REALLY?"
Mamoru: "I know a place where the setting sun is so huge, it turns the whole ocean orange."
Usagi: "GREAT! LET'S—"
Mamoru: "As soon as you've finished your summer homework, we can—"
Usagi: "You cruel bastich, you know I won't get it done until the last minute!" /storms off.
Mamoru: "Wait! I didn't know! Wait! I was kidding! Hey—" /pursues.



MEANWHILE, LUNA AND ARTEMIS
Artemis: "You found them yet?"
Luna: "Nope. You?"
Artemis: "No. First they're going to the beach, now they're going to the park—MAKE UP YOUR BLOODY MINDS, GIRLS!"
Luna: "Eh, I understand them too well. It's summer… the blue sea… the white beach… a date with a boyfriend at a carnival… The battle will come all too soon. Let 'em have their fun for now."
Artemis: "Feh. Typical female."
Luna: "I beg your pardon! Such attitudes are rather antiquated, my dear Artemis."
Artemis: "Piffle. There are fundamental differences, and this argument simply proves my point."
Luna: "Nonsense!"

Luna: ♫ Anything you can do I can do better; I can do anything better than you. ♫
Artemis: "No, you can't."
Luna: "Yes, I can."
Artemis: "No, you can't."
Luna: "Yes, I can."
Artemis: "No, you can't."
Luna: ♫ Yes, I can! Yes, I can! ♫
Artemis: ♫ Anything you can be I can be greater; sooner or later, I'm greater than you. ♫
Luna: "No, you're not."
Artemis: "Yes, I am."
Luna: "No, you're not."
Artemis: "Yes, I am."
Luna: "No, you're not."
Artemis: ♫ Yes, I am! Yes, I am! ♫

Artemis: ♫I can catch a partridge, without a single cartridge. ♫
Luna: ♫ I can get a sparrow, with a bow and arrow. ♫ /flexes toes dextrously.
Artemis: ♫ I can live on bread and cheese! ♫
Luna: "And only on that?"
Artemis: "Yes."
Luna: "So can a rat."

Artemis: ♫ Any note you can reach I can go higher. ♫
Luna: ♫ I can sing anything higher than you. ♫
Artemis: ♫ No, you can't. ♫
Luna /high. ♫ Yes, I can. ♫
Artemis /higher. ♫ No, you can't. ♫
Luna /higher still. ♫ Yes, I can. ♫
Artemis /even higher than that. ♫ No, you can't. ♫
Luna /really high. ♫ Yes, I can. ♫
Artemis /stands on tip-toes. ♫ No, you can't. ♫
Luna /deep breath.
Luna: ♫ [so high we can't hear it] ♫
Dogs barking, car alarms triggered, glass shatters.
Artemis /ears ringing. "…Yes, you can…"

Luna: ♫ Anything you can buy, I can buy cheaper; I can buy anything cheaper than you. ♫
Artemis: "Fifty cents."
Luna: "Forty cents."
Artemis: "Thirty cents."
Luna: "Twenty cents."
Artemis: "No, you can't."
Luna: ♫ Yes, I can! Yes, I can! ♫

Artemis: ♫ Anything you can say, I can say softer. ♫
Luna: ♫ I can say anything softer than you. ♫
Artemis: "No, you can't."
Luna /soft. "Yes, I can."
Artemis /softer. "No, you can't."
Luna /softer still. "Yes, I can."
Artemis /barely audible. "No, you can't."
Luna /…
Artemis: "Subvocalizing doesn't count!"
Luna: ♫ Yes, it does! Yes, it does! ♫

Artemis: ♫ I can drink my liquor faster than a flicker. ♫
Luna: ♫ I can do it quicker and get even sicker. ♫
Artemis: ♫ I can open any safe! ♫
Luna: "Without being caught?
Artemis: "Sure."
Luna: "That's what I thought—you crook."
Artemis: "Not crook—special agent!"

Artemis: ♫ Any note you can hold, I can hold longer. ♫
Luna: ♫ I can hold any note longer than you. ♫
Artemis: ♫ No, you can't. ♫
Luna: ♫ Yes, I caaaaan. ♫
Artemis: ♫ No, you caaaaaaaaaan't. ♫
Luna: ♫ Yes, I caaaaaaaaaaaaaaan. ♫
Artemis: ♫ No, you caaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan't. ♫
Luna: "Okay, I'll give that one to you."
Artemis: "Thank you."
Luna: "Long-winded ponce."

Luna: ♫ Anything you can wear, I can wear better; in what you'd wear I'd look better than you. ♫
Artemis: "…but we don't wear clothes."
Luna /poses. "And I am stunning without them!"
Artemis: "No, you're not!"
Luna: ♫ Yes, I am! Yes, I am! ♫

Artemis: ♫ Anything you can say, I can say faster. ♫
Luna: ♫ I can say anything faster than you. ♫
Artemis: "No, you can't."
Luna: "Yes I can."
Artemis: "Noyoucan't."
Luna: "YsIcn."
Artemis: "nyt!"
Luna and Artemis /both reduced to gibberish, forced to call it a draw.

Artemis: ♫ I can jump a hurdle! ♫
Luna: ♫ I can wear a girdle. ♫
Artemis: ♫ I can knit a sweater. ♫
Luna: ♫ I could fill it better. ♫
Artemis: ♫ I can do most anything! ♫
Luna: "Can you bake a pie?"
Artemis: "No."
Luna: "…Neither can I."

Artemis: ♫ Anything you can sing, I can sing sweeter. ♫
Luna: ♫ I can sing anything sweeter than you. ♫
Artemis: ♫ No, you can't. ♫
Luna /sweet. ♫ Yes, I can. ♫
Artemis /tender. ♫ No, you can't. ♫
Luna /lovingly. ♫ Yes, I can. ♫
Artemis /caressingly. ♫ No, you can't. ♫
Luna /intimately ♫ Yes, I—
Artemis and Luna /both realize they're nose to nose, blush, and separate.

Artemis: ♫ No, you can't, can't, can't! ♫
Luna: ♫ Yes, I can, can, can, can! ♫
Artemis: ♫ No, you can't! ♫
Luna: ♫ Yes, I can! ♫

Artemis: "I'm sorry I dismissed you as a 'typical female.' I will not do such again."
Luna: "Apology accepted! —And no smart remarks after the fact!"
Artemis: "We haven't the time. We still have to find the girls."
Luna: "Oops! You're right. I plum forgot."
Artemis: "…Typical black cat."
Luna: "I BEG YOUR PARDON?!"
Artemis: "Nothing!"



THE ASTROLOGY BOOTH
Cue sitar music.

Minako: "…cor, lumme, it's dark in 'ere, innit?"
Makoto: "An able observer is our Minako."
Rei: "¿What's that glowing crystal ball thing?"
Ami: "I think it's a glowing crystal ball—"
Rei: "Thank you."
Ami: "—that is representative of the Heavenly Globe."
Rei /genuinely. "Ah. Thank you."
Madame Astrologer: "Love is just a sweet, painful desire for girls, a beautiful white magic. Welcome to the Astrology booth. Shall I tell what the stars know of your love?"
Minako: "Oooooo, me first! I'm so excited!"
Madame Astrologer: "Someone holds a grudge against you… a vendetta… they wish to kill you…"
Minako: "Um."
Madame Astrologer: "…in the middle of the night, at the 13th hour, you will become frozen, and then consumed by darkness—"
Makoto /grabs everyone and throws them to the ground. "SHE'S READYING A DEATH CURSE! GET DOWN!"
Rei: "…¿How'd you know?"
Madame Astrologer /unmasks as Queen Beryl. "BWAHAHAHAHA! Guess who?"

Ami: "Queen Beryl! But how?"
Queen Beryl: "As long as darkness exists within human hearts, I can endlessly resurrect myself. But don't worry, kids, I'm not going to hurt you this instant. In a way, I'm your biggest fan."
The girls /?
Queen Beryl: "See my collection of Chibi Sailor Moon toys? I've got the whole set."
Rei: "Uh, so do I. ¿So what?"
Queen Beryl: "Voodoo dolls." /throws the collection into boiling water.
The girls /scream and fall to the ground.
Minako: "Saito, help!"
Saito /laughs evilly. "RESISTANCE IS USELESS!"
Minako: "No! It can't be!"
Saito: "It is! Saito reversed is Kunzite!"
Minako: "No, it's not. It's 'Otias.'"
Ami: "That's in romaji. It'd be Toisa, in kana—"
Minako: "Wait, so, in Japanese, the word for kunzite is—?"
Student A: "And I am Zoisite! You don't really think I'd fall for you, do you, girl?" /grabs Kunzite's arm, jealously.
Rei: "But A'tneduts isn't Japanese for zoisite, either."
Queen Beryl: "Okay, enough stalling! Nephrite, Jadeite, all of you! Seize them and let the beating commence! Find the Silver Crystal!"
They start slapping the girls around.
Jadeite: "Isn't this nice, being out and about again?"

Usagi /bursts in, dramatically. "YOU COWARDS! How dare you— Wait, I forgot to transform outside."
Queen Beryl: "Grab her, quick!"
They wrestle her to the ground.
Queen Beryl: "I bet she's got the Crystal!"
Luna and Artemis /burst in, dramatically. "We'll—"
<< Queen Beryl casts Dark Tone! >>
< Artemis is down! >
< Luna is down! >
Usagi: "Damn, when'd you get so fast on the draw?!"
Queen Beryl: "The second play-through is always tougher! Give me the Crystal, and I promise to make your death less than horrible."



SUDDENLY!
Enter Tuxedo Mask, dramatically, armed with +3 blessed throwing roses.
Usagi: "It's Tuxedo Mask!"
Queen Beryl: "Yes, we know that. Endymion—please stay out of this!"
Mamoru: "I'm going to smash your ugly ambitions!"
Queen Beryl: "Frell."



BATTLE IS JOINED!
CUE Final Fantasy battle music of your choice.

Tuxedo Mask takes on ALL FOUR GENERALS, single-handedly. He ducks and weaves. He kicks and chops. He swirls his cape like a matador. They can't even muss his hair.

Queen Beryl /frowns. "Reinforcements!"
Nephrite: "Aha! We have learned from past mistakes!"
Queen Beryl: "Indeed! OVERWHELMING FORCE!"

Squillions of Evil Mannequins zerg-rush Tuxedo Mask. But his kung fu is too powerful for them; he stands off the army, though they are able to prevent him from pressing the attack or escaping.

Mamoru: "A stand off, eh? Time for a gamble!"
<< Mamoru : Attack > Queen Beryl >>
<< Queen Beryl parries and ripostes! >>
<< Queen Beryl casts Dark Tone! >>
< Mamoru is down! >
Usagi: "NOOOOOOOOOOOO—"

The Four Generals curbstomp Tuxedo Mask until he's unconscious.

Queen Beryl: "Don't break him! I have plans for him! Right, the castle should be about warmed up by now, so let's get back and—"
Kunzite: "Shouldn't we kill them?"
Nephrite: "Yeah, I mean—"
Queen Beryl: "Torturing the man who turned me down will be much more fun, and we can't get the Silver Crystal by killing them, anyway. Hey, you little wretches—once you're back on your feet, come by my castle. I'll trade your boy-toy for the Silver Crystal. Adieu!"

Exit villains, laughing.



DUN DUN DUN
Ami /first awake. "Luna, Artemis, you alive?"
Artemis: "…that's a debateable point. But don't worry about us."
Luna: "You've got to get back to D Point and—"
Usagi: "What's at A, B, and C Points?"
Luna /patiently. "—and defeat Queen Beryl, or Earth is— What is the word?"
Artemis: "Doomed, really."
Luna: "Yes, doomed."
Rei: "¿What, AGAIN…?"
Minako: "Yes, look—the Sun's already starting to go out…"
Usagi /muttering curses. "I don't want to die again."
Makoto: "Can't let her win, though."
Usagi: "Yeah." /stands up.
Ami: "But do we even have a chance, injured as we are?"

The team struggles to their feet.

Usagi /moving to help them all up. ♫ YEAAHH! Another prophet of disaster who says this ship is lost; another prophet of disaster leaving you to count the cost. Taunting us with visions, afflicting us with fear, predicting war for millions in the hope that one appears… ♫
Ami /stands up. ♫ No point asking when it is. ♫
Rei /stands up. ♫ No point asking who's to go. ♫
Minako /stands up. ♫ No point asking what's the game. ♫
Makoto /stand up. ♫ No point asking who's to blame. ♫
Usagi: ♫ 'Cause if you're gonna die— ♫
The others: ♫ If you're gonna die— ♫
Usagi: ♫ If you die— ♫
The others: ♫ If you're gonna die— ♫
Usagi: ♫ If you're gonna die— ♫
The others: ♫ If you're gonna die— ♫
Usagi: ♫ If you're gonna dieeeeeeee— ♫

Usagi: ♫ If you're gonna die, die with your boots on! If you're gonna try, well! Stick around. Gonna cry, just move along, if you're gonna die, you're gonna die! If you're gonna die, die with your boots on! If you're gonna try, well! Stick around. Gonna cry, just move along, if you're gonna die, you're gonna die! ♫

Dramatic suiting-up-for-battle montage.

Usagi /Moon Power Make Up! ♫ In 13 the Beast is rising, the Frenchman did surmise; through earthquakes and starvation, the warlord will arise. Terror, death, destruction, pour from the Eastern sands, but the truth of all predictions, is always in your hands. ♫
Makoto /Jupiter Power Make Up! ♫ No point asking when it is. ♫
Ami /Mercury Power Make Up! ♫ No point asking who's to go. ♫
Rei /Mars Power Make Up! ♫ No point asking what's the game. ♫
Minako /Venus Power Make Up! ♫ No point asking who's to blame. ♫
Usagi: ♫ 'Cause if you're gonna die— ♫
The others: ♫ If you're gonna die— ♫
Usagi: ♫ If you die— ♫ /laughs
The others: ♫ If you're gonna die— ♫
Usagi: ♫ If you're gonna die— ♫
The others: ♫ If you're gonna die— ♫
Usagi: ♫ If you're gonna dieeeeeeee— ♫

Usagi: ♫ If you're gonna die, die with your boots on! If you're gonna try, well! Stick around, gonna cry, just move along, if you're gonna die, you're gonna die! You're gonna die, ha-ha! Die with your boots on! If you're gonna try, well, stick around! Gonna cry, just move along, if you're gonna die, you'll die! ♫

They march out, ready, willing, and prepared to fight.

Minako and Rei /interleaving guitar riffs.
Makoto /bass madness.

Usagi: ♫ They dieeeeeed with their boooooooots on, yes, they diiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeed… The daaaaaay they die with their boots onnnnnnnn, we diiiiiiieeeeeeee… ♫
Everyone: ♫ WE DIE! WE DIE! WE DIE! WE DIE! WE DIE! ♫

Off they go! As fast as light!

Minako and Rei /bring more guitar awesome.

Slow-motion power march.

Rei: ♫ No point asking when it is. ♫
Minako: ♫ No point asking who's to go. ♫
Makoto: ♫ No point asking what's the game. ♫
Ami: ♫ No point asking who's to blame. ♫
Usagi: ♫ 'Cause if you're gonna die— ♫
The others: ♫ If you're gonna die— ♫
Usagi: ♫ If you die— ♫
The others: ♫ If you're gonna die— ♫
Usagi: ♫ If you're gonna die— ♫
The others: ♫ If you're gonna die— ♫
Usagi: ♫ If you're gonna dieeeeeeee— ♫

Usagi: ♫ If you're gonna die, die with your boots on! If you're gonna try, try to just stick around, gonna cry, just move along, if you're gonna die, you're gonna die! Gonna die, die with your boots on! If you're gonna try, well! Stick around. Gonna cry, just move along, if you're gonna die: DIE! ♫
 

Shadowjack

Cartoon Poet
RPGnet Member
Validated User
Side Story: Legend of the Dark Kingdom's Resurrection (Post 3 of 3)

D POINT
Mamoru has been tied to a cross and stuck out in the middle of the icy chamber.

Enter Beryl and her court.


Queen Beryl: ♫ I know that your powers of retention, are as wet as a warthog's backside, but as thick as you are—PAY ATTENTION! My words are a matter of pride. It's clear from your vacant expressions, the lights are not all on upstairs, but we're talking queens and successions—even you can't be caught unawares! So prepare for a chance of a lifetime; be prepared for sensational news! A shining new era, is tip-toeing nearer— ♫
Nephrite /points at Mamoru. "And where does he feature?"
Queen Beryl /tweaks his cheeks. "Just listen to teacher."
Queen Beryl: ♫ I know it sounds sordid, but you'll be rewarded, when at last I am given my dues! And injustice delicious squared — be prepaaaaaared! ♫
Zoisite: "Yeah! Be prepared. We'll be prepared! …For what?"
Queen Beryl: "For the death of the Princess."
Kunzite: "Is she sick?"
Queen Beryl: "No, fool! We're going to kill her! And the Sailors, too."
Jadeite: "Great idea! Who needs royalty?"
All four Generals: ♫ No princess, no queen, la la la la la! ♫
Queen Beryl: "IDIOTS! There will BE a queen!"
Nephrite: "But you said—"
Queen Beryl: "I will be Queen! Stick with me, and you'll never lack essence again!"
Nephrite: "LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!"
Generals and Court: "LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!"
Youma troopers pass in review.
Chorus: ♫ It's great that we'll soon be connected with a queen who'll be all-time adored. ♫
Queen Beryl: "Of course, quid pro quo, you're expected, to take certain duties on board."
Queen Beryl: ♫The future is littered with prizes, and though I'm the main addressee, the point that I must emphasize is: ♫
Queen Beryl: "YOU WON'T GET A SNIFF WITHOUT ME!"
Queen Beryl: ♫ So prepare for the coup of the century; be prepared for the murkiest scam. ♫
Chorus: ♫ Oooooh, la-la-la! ♫
Queen Beryl: ♫ Meticulous planning, tenacity spanning, decades of denial, is simply why I'll be Queen undisputed, respected, saluted, and seen for the wonder I am—yes, my teeth and ambitions are bared—BE PREPARED! ♫
Chorus: ♫ Yes, our teeth and ambitions are bared—BE PREPARED! ♫



Queen Beryl: "KUNZITE!"
Kunzite: "Yes, your Majesty!"
Queen Beryl: "Is Tuxedo Mask still alive?"
Kunzite: "We'll check. Jadeite!"
Jadeite /punches Mamoru in the gut.
Mamoru /groans.
Jadeite: "Yes!"
Queen Beryl: "Excellent! Don't kill him."
Nephrite: "He's our bait, right?"
Queen Beryl: "Bait, nothin'. Once we use him to extort the Silver Crystal out of the Sailors—I'm a-gonna marry that wonderful man! BWAHAHAHAHA!"
Nephrite: "…"
Zoisite: "I wanna be an usher! Or a flower girl, I'm not picky."
Queen Beryl: "Don't let him go, don't kill him, understand?"
Generals: "Yes, ma'am!"
Queen Beryl: "Ah, Sailors, hurry and give me the Silver Crystal, so I can expand my kingdom!"
A Mysterious Voice: "Oh, is that what they called it in your day?"
Queen Beryl /!



STARKLY CORUSCANT NON-CANONICAL TRANSFORMATION SEQUENCE!
Mercury: 1
Mars: 1
Jupiter: 1
Venus: 1
Moon: 1



VOILA!
The Sailor Senshi burst in, dramatically!
Usagi: "IN THE NAME OF THE MOON—"
Queen Beryl: "GUARDS! SEIZE THEM!"

Everybody attacks everybody at once! Usagi takes on Beryl personally, while the rest of the Sailors battle the Four Generals… and their Evil Secretaries. Beryl throws off Usagi, who becomes lost in the melee—so she decides to free Mamoru while everyone else is distracted.

Makoto picks up Nephrite and throws him across the room.

Sailor Moon leaps over a railing and takes out Jadeite.

Ami and Zoisite box back and forth.

Minako slaps Kunzite silly, then he gets her in a headlock and starts firing body blows.

Rei and Jadeite chase each other all around the chamber, until he corners her by the central dias.


<< Rei : Cast > BurnMandala : Jadeite >>
< Jadeite is hurt badly! >
Jadeite /grits his teeth through the pain and tackles Rei.

They both tumble into one of D Points inconveniently-placed dimensional holes. Just like that, they're gone forever.

Usagi: "NOOOOOOO!"

<< Makoto : Cast > SparkWave : Nephrite >>
< Nephrite is hurt badly! >
Nephrite /collapses right into Makoto's arms…
Makoto: "Poor fool. I almost feel sorry—"
Nephrite /reveals that he's holding a grenade with no pin.
Makoto /!

BOOM!

Usagi: "Don't you dare die! No!"

<< Ami : Cast > ShineAqua : Zoisite >>
< Zoisite is hurt! >
Zoisite /goes absolutely berserk, and just suicide charges Ami.
Ami /!!!

The two fall off a very high cliff with no safety railings.

Usagi: "This is ridiculous! STOP! STOP!"

Kunzite and Minako have been wrestling all over the chamber, leaving smashed furniture in their wake.

<< Minako : Tech > Two-Fisted Kirk Punch : Kunzite >>
< Kunzite is stunned! >
Minako /sprints for high ground.
Kunzite /recovers, and pursues.
<< Minako : Cast > LovelyChain : Kunzite >>
< Kunzite is down! >
Kunzite: "…Minako…"
Minako: "…Saito?"
Kunzite: "Minako…"
Minako: "Saito!" /bends over him.
Kunzite /caresses Mina's face, tenderly…
Kunzite /grabs her neck and squeezes.
Minako /!
Usagi: "NO NO NO NO—"
<< Minako : Cast > LovelyChain : Kunzite >>
< Kunzite is destroyed! >
< Minako was too close! Minako is slain! >
Usagi: "AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!"



AND JUST LIKE THAT, THE BATTLE IS OVER
Usagi: "EVERYONE HAS DIED AGAIN!"
Mamoru: "…Sailor Moon… Usagi… run! Save yourself!"
Queen Beryl: "BWAHAHAHAHA!"
<< Beryl casts Dark Tone! >>
Mamoru /daring last-moment SACRIFICE!
< Mamoru is hit! Mamoru is down! >
Usagi: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
Queen Beryl: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
Mamoru /rose petal death scene. "I… really wanted… to take you to the sea… I'm sorry I can't… keep that promise…" /expires.
Usagi /CPR!
Queen Beryl /assists!
Usagi /?!
Queen Beryl: "…but he's already dead."
Usagi: "NICE SHOOTING, TEX!"
Queen Beryl: "…"
Queen Beryl /starts laughing and can't stop.
Queen Beryl: "Ah, what the hell. The Dark Energy is already eclipsing the Sun, and soon all the world will collapse into darkness… so what does it matter, really?"



CUT TO: A ROOFTOP IN TOKYO
Artemis: "Well, the Sun's going out."
Luna: "Must be the End of the World."
Artemis: "Again."
Luna: "I'm getting the incredible feeling of deja vu."
Artemis: "I think we've been caught in some sort of time stutter."
Luna: "I'm getting the incredible feeling of deja vu."
Artemis: "I think we've been caught in some sort of time stutter."
Luna: "So they're all dead again?"
Artemis: "And Sailor Moon will have to use the Silver Crystal again."
Luna: "And then she'll die again?! Out of my way! I'm going to D Point!"
Artemis: "There's no point, it's happened all before, it's happening again! Just like last time, we can't stop it!"



BACK TO: D POINT
Queen Beryl: "All things in the universe feel hate, greed, and malice, and when I slaughter everyone but you, I'll turn this into a world of darkness! Hahahahaha… ha… hmmm."

Awkward pause.

Usagi: "Everyone but me?"
Queen Beryl: "I think I'll spend eternity heckling you. You'd look very pretty encased in crystal on my mantelpiece. Your hate should be very tasty."
Usagi: "I don't hate you, I pity you."
Queen Beryl: "I DON'T NEED YOUR DAMN PITY."
Usagi: "We've been all over this before, and you're just doing it again. And you know how it's going to turn out."
Queen Beryl: "You don't mean—?"
Usagi /pulls the Scepter out of hammerspace. "Hmmmm. Seems larger than I remembered."
Queen Beryl: "You're not going to give your life for the world again?! Didn't it hurt enough the first time?!"
Usagi: "Nope."
Queen Beryl /quick-draws and fires!
Usagi /staggers.
Usagi /but the ghosts of her friends are with her.
Usagi /stands back up. "In the name of Mars—"
Queen Beryl: "GAH!"
Usagi: "—Jupiter—"
Queen Beryl: "FAH!"
Usagi: "—Venus—"
Queen Beryl: "BUH!"
Usagi: "—Mercury—"
Queen Beryl: "MUH!"
Usagi: "—AND the Moon."

<< Usagi : Cast > PrincessPunish : Queen Beryl >>

The energies surge back and forth again… just as before. Without hope of stopping or ceasing… finally…

Queen Beryl: "It's just like before, it's just like before— I WON'T let you seal me away again! I won't!"
Usagi: "It's already happened!"
Queen Beryl /falls. "Just remember this! So long as hatred exists in human hearts, I'll be there!"
Queen Beryl is consumed by flames and blinding light.
Usagi: "And so long as love exists in human hearts, so will I."
Usagi /falls.



BACK TO: THE CATS
Artemis: "…And now the Sun's recovering."
Luna: "So that's it. She's dead, and Beryl with her."
Artemis: "Probably."
Luna: "I refuse to see it until I see the body." /starts walking.
Artemis: "Luna! …Sigh. Maybe she's right…" /follows.



BACK TO: D POINT
Usagi is now alone in D Point, mortally wounded. Having nothing better to do, she decides to go somewhere else. Step by painful step, she stumbles in the direction of the strongest light… she feels cold air… a snowflake on her face, then another… she stumbles, unable to see the ground through the misty air, so she crawls. Up. Up she crawls.

As she crawls, she remembers the simple joys of young life, and promises herself that she will find them again, and be thankful for them to the fullest.

At the edge of the Pit, just outside, beneath the dimly sunlit sky, to the sound of the howling wind, she perishes.




THE END
Luna: "USAGIIIIIIII!"
Artemis: "Luna! …Usagi? Ami? Mako? Minako? Rei?"
Luna: "Where is everybody?"
Artemis: "We've searched everywhere, Luna. It's cold, it's dark, and we know how it must have ended. I understand your feelings, but… let's go home, please."
Luna: "There aren't even any bodies."
Artemis: "…Hello. That's right."
Luna: "Some form of power is at work here… My God, look at the Moon!"
Artemis: "IT'S THEM!"

A platform is lowered from the ceiling, by a crane, and out of it step the five Sailors, and Tuxedo Mask, smiling and waving.
Usagi: "What? You didn't think we'd stay dead in a non-canonical story?"
Luna: "Oh, shut up! You had me worried sick!"

Usagi: ♫ I've got a dream 'bout an angel on the beach and the perfect waves are starting to come. His hair is flying out in ribbons of gold and his touch has got the power to stun. ♫
Makoto: ♫ I've got a dream 'bout an angel in the forest enchanted by the edge of a lake. His body's flowing in the jewels alive and the earth below is starting to shake. ♫
Usagi: ♫ But I don't see any angels in the city, I don't hear any holy choirs sing, and if I can't get an angel, I can still get a boy, and a boy'd be the next best thing—the next best thing to an angel—a boy'd be the next best thing! ♫

Music swells.

Rei: ♫ I've got a dream 'bout a boy in a castle, and he's dancing like a cat on the stairs. He's got the fire of a prince in his eyes and the thunder of a drum in his ears. ♫
Ami: ♫ I've got a dream 'bout a boy on a star lookin' down upon the rim of the world. He's there all alone and dreamin' of someone like me—I'm not an angel but at least I'm a girl. ♫
Minako: ♫ I've got a dream when the darkness is over, we'll be lyin' in the rays of the sun—♫
Sailors together: ♫—but it's only a dream and tonight is for real. You'll never know what it means, but you'll know how it feels, it's gonna be over (Over!) before you know it's begun (Before you know it's begun!) It's all we really got tonight, stop your cryin', hold on (Tonight!) Before you know it, it's gone (Tonight!) Tonight is what it means to be young, tonight is what it means to be young. ♫
Everyone: ♫ Let the revels begin, let the fire be started, we're dancing for the restless and the broken-hearted. Let the revels begin, let the fire be started, we're dancing for the desperate and the broken-hearted. (Tonight is what it means to be young, before you know that it's gone…) ♫
Sailors: ♫ Set a prayer in the darkness for the magic to come. No matter what it seems, tonight is what it means to be young… Before you know it, it's gone, tonight is what it means to be young, before you know it's gone… ♫

Electronic dance segment.

Final curtain calls. The Evil Secretaries and Ms. Haruna (with a wink), the Four Generals (wrasslin' and jokin'), Artemis and Luna, Queen Beryl, Tuxedo Mask, Sailor Venus, Sailor Jupiter, Sailor Mars, Sailor Mercury, Sailor Moon (with roses), and finally the entire cast together.

Everyone: ♫ I've got a dream when the darkness is over, we'll be lyin' in the rays of the sun, but it's only a dream and tonight is for real. You'll never know what it means, but you'll know how it feels. It's gonna be over (Over!) before you know it's begun! It's all we really got tonight, stop your cryin', hold on (Tonight!) before you know it, it's gone (Tonight!) Tonight is what it means to be young, tonight is what it means to be young… ♫
Everyone: ♫ Let the revels begin, let the fire be started, we're dancing for the restless and the broken-hearted. Let the revels begin, let the fire be started, we're dancing for the desperate and the broken-hearted. (Tonight is what it means to be young, before you know that it's gone…) Set a prayer in the darkness for the magic to come. No matter what it seems, tonight is what it means to be young… ♫
Everyone: ♫ The things they say, and then the things they do, nothin's gonna stop us if our aim is true… The things they say, and then the things they do, nothin's gonna stop us if our aim is true… (Tonight is what it means to be young…) ♫

Usagi /bows. "Thank you!"


Spoiler: Show
1. "Princes of the Universe", Queen. Duh.
2. "Have You Been To Baía?", from The Three Caballeros.
3. "Le Vie en Rose", the old standard by Edith Piaf.
4. "Wunderbar!", Cole Porter, from Kiss, Me Kate.
5. "The Girl Next Door", one of Sinatra's.
6. "The Nicest Kids In Town", from Hairspray.
7. "Anything You Can Do", Irving Berlin, originally from Annie, Get Your Gun.
8. Your choice of battle music from the Final Fantasy games.
9. "Die With Your Boots On," Iron Maiden.
10. "Be Prepared", from The Lion King.
11. "Tonight Is What It Means To Be Young", from Streets of Fire.
 

Zuki

Registered User
Validated User
Well, damn. Sailor Moon Rock Opera.

That was fun.

And so close on the heels of the comic. You're spoiling us, Shadowjack.
 
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