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[IWIW] Walkin' on Sailor Moon (thread 3 of a continuing series)

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Shadowjack

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Chapter 1-2: Minako in Crown Game Center

While we're still "on hiatus." These are very quick to write up, so I'm just doing 'em in between other things.

Frontispiece
The chapter illustration, which I shall discretely not show here, depicts Minako bent over as she leaps over a railing. Her skirt and slip as they fly up are just this side of failing to preserve modesty. I say, Ms. Takeuchi! You are a naughty, naughty artist. :p


Opening Narration
Artemis lays out the basics, that Minako is an incarnation of Venus, Goddess of Love and Beauty (!), and yet is late, lazy, narcoleptic, and—

—and Minako interrupts Artemis's narration indignantly, which reveals that Artemis narrates to himself out loud, like Captain Kirk.

Minako: "You know, I haven't actually decided if I want to be a 'soldier of justice' yet."
Artemis: "WHAT?! But you're the Chosen One! You're the only one who can do it! What's WRONG with being a Soldier of Love and Justice?!"
Minako: "…Well, for starters, the uniform is so uncool."



Off to the Video Arcade!
Minako also has a crush upon Motoki, but is far more interested in the games.

While Minako is seemingly distracted, Artemis resumes narrating, accusing her of being a rude, quarrelsome, gluttonous tomboy, albeit one with good reflexes. Minako also has good ears, because she heard the whole thing, and calls him in return (sigh, sorry folks) a transsexual. Artemis doesn't quite know how to take that, so Minako explains that since Artemis was the name of the virgin goddess of the hunt, his being a tomcat with that name seems a little odd. Artemis is impressed at her knowledge. Less impressed when she reveals that the knowledge came from video games, but still. The ensuing argument draws stares, and explains why Motoki didn't think much of Usagi's arguments with her talking cat.

This conversation also reveals that, at this time, Minako is the only girl who ever comes here on her own, instead of to humor a boyfriend. Obviously that changed by Usagi's time, as word of the cute counter guy got out…



Let's Play!
Minako is 2nd ranked player on Lovely Fight, an action game with a battle-thonged female protagonist. Minako has vowed to make it to 1st rank today, but whoever it was is just too good.

In walks a creeeeeeeepy video game otaku, who is outraged at Minako's violating a male preserve, with her long hair, and sweet perfume, and pretty uniform, and…

Mina can't concentrate on her game when this dating couple keeps playing around with the crane game ("Darling, get me that one! Oh, try again!"), so she storms over, pushes him aside, gets the desired toy in a single try—and then takes it away herself, just so they'll shut up about it. Creepy Guy is creepy, while Artemis starts to think that games might be good training.



The Origin of the Sailor V Video Games
Artemis asks the Boss to pull a few strings, and within a couple of days, Artemis arranges for a new game to arrive at the arcade, complete with promotional material and forged shipping orders. (Artemis has to smuggle the packages and shipping crate into the building himself, which is quite a feat for a 10 pound quadraped.) No one's ever heard of Sailor V, except Minako, who is is mortified… but can't resist the challenge… and can't beat the game, either.

After thrashing it for way too long, Artemis gently hints that maybe she should let someone have a turn. She apologizes to the line forming behind her, and tries Lovely Fight again… and discovers, of course, that the practice Sailor V gave let her finally get 1st rank on Lovely Fight. (I've had this happen to me before, enough so that I deliberately use video game "cross-training" when I'm stuck on something. Nice touch.)

Enter Creepy Guy Taku, whose name she just knocked off the board. He accuses her of being a man in disguise, because no woman could possibly play so well. "So take those clothes off!"

…Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.



New power up!
Artemis and the Boss think it's extremely unlikely that Creepy Guy poses a serious threat, but they might as well give Minako some practice in evasion techniques. Guess what? The compact also has disguise powers.

Minako's first choice is a ludicrous armored suit like a video game heroine. Unfortunately, she promptly stumbles and sprawls on the ground due to the weight… which Creepy Guy takes as an invitation.

Quick! Transform into something else! Whoosh, wham, it's Sailor V! And Venus decides that the Sailor uniform isn't so bad after all.

Creepy Guy likes it, too, and goes for a skirt flip.

Sailor V kick!

…Realizing that she just beat the crap out of someone (who deserved it, admittedly) in a very public place, she makes a hasty exit.



Aftermath
Minako's decided that name recognition is pretty awesome. Artemis wonders if Minako is really suited for this line of work. Motoki thought the whole thing was a staged event, PR for the new video game.

And let's just think about that here: Artemis arranged for the development of an entire arcade game prototype, and associated advertising copy, solely for the purpose of a single training lesson for Minako. This boy's got a blank check. "Okay, Minako, for today's survival training, we've rented Okinawa. Yes, the whole island. Now pay attention, damn it!"
 

Shadowjack

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Sailor V Chapter 1-3: Sailor V Appears! Channel 44 - Pandora's Plot!

Introductions
A new teen idol, "Pandora", debuts tonight, and the town is plastered with posters for it. Minako swipes one. Artemis scolds her—and, once again, draws stares from all over. ("Hey, that cat just talked!") Kind of funny that Minako has to be the responsible one and remind him to hold his tongue.

Character designs have shifted. Artemis no longer has BIG SCARY EYES, but rather looks more like the design used in the TV show, and Hikaru looks less like Ami. On the other hand, Mina gets startled off her bike by this bespectacled nerd with a habit of materializing out of nowhere whose name is Amano. (Unlike Umino, he's blond, but it's the same guy. There's nothing wrong with this, however, because every school seems to have a guy like that.)

The poster falls into the gutter, oh noes!


Shameless Abuse of Power
Having arrived late for school again, Minako is assigned massive amounts of English work. However, the magic transformation pen also functions as a pen that always knows the proper answers.

Artemis: "MINA! You're only supposed to use that pen for Great Justice!"
Teacher: "What was that, Aino?"
Minako: "Nothing! Nothing! Ix-nay on the alking-tay!"

Mina also spends a moment to consider the Crescent Moon Compact, which reflects the true forms of things. (Which is why Sailor V stares out at her when she looks into it.)



Enter the Plot
Everyone at school is enthralled by the new idol, Pandora. Free signed CDs to anyone who shows up at the studio for the broadcast (and diamond rings for ladies!) and a special performance via satellite and cable, and free cable tuners for fans who (like Mina) don't have one. (Amano thinks all this TV stuff is silly, when one has the Internet.)

Obviously, Pandora is signed with Ackbar's Perfectly Harmless Records.

So, that night, it's, "HURRY, DAD, HOOK IT UP! It's almost starting!" Panic panic panic! Mom gets fed up and sends her to bed: "Quit whining about the damn TV! If you don't study, you'll wind up a failure just like your father!"

…Oops. Uh, did you mean to say that, ma'am?



The Plot Thickens
Minako and Amano are practically the only people who showed up on time to class. A few other students trickle in, looking like strung out addicts. Astrung-out teacher sends them all home, saying, "Class doesn't matter as long as you watch TV."

Minako tries to talk to Hikaru about this, and Hikaru freaks out like an addict jonesin' for her fix. "LET ME GO! I HAVE TO GO HOME AND WATCH TV!"

Minako walks home through the empty streets, feeling like the last woman on Earth.

At home, Mom is sitting three inches from the TV, staring into the static. The noise hurts Minako, but Mom fights her off when she tries to shut it off. Mina is horrified.

Artemis steps out of the shadows all creepsome and dramatic, bearing the pen radio. The Boss reports that this is a priority situation: all Japan is in danger of being brainwashed. "The idol Pandora is just a cheap front act. She's a devil in disguise, plotting nothing less than WORLD CONQUEST!" Dun dun dun!

Not a bad start for our first major Dark Kingdom plot.



Quick, Robin, to the Batmobile!
Minako and Artemis run off to the TV station (Channel 44)—with a confused Amano following somewhere behind them. Minako transforms into a policewoman to get past the guard at the gate… though he seems more impressed by her curves than her badge… she's thrilled that the trick worked… Amano somehow gets in behind them.

Clue: There are no mirrors in the dressing rooms.

We see a bit of Pandora's idoru act, which makes use of cutting edge superliminal brainwashing technology. ("Hey, you! Be my slave!" "Uh, okay.") When she takes five, she practically trips over Amano, grins like a snake, and prepares to dismember him for seeing her true face.

Amano: "HELP ME MINAKOOOOO!"



Battle is Joined
Minako throws a "Crescent Boomerang" (?!), then draws her police pistol and lays the law on Pandora. This gets Amano to safety. Then she transforms to V-form.

…She doesn't fire the pistol, but I wonder, now, if she could have. Probably.

Minako: "I am Sailor Venus, the sailor-suited beautiful soldier!"
Pandora: "'Sailor-suited beautiful—?' BAH! Don't make me laugh! SLAVES! SEIZE HER!"
Minako: "Oh, no! What should I do? I can't kill everyone!"

So, uh, you'll only kill some of them, then? I suppose I should be glad at her restraint. :D

Another Burly Brawl ensues, waves and waves of brainwashed minions. Sailor V busts several jaws, and shouts for Artemis to think up some plan or something!

Artemis puts the pieces together, and shouts, "Use the mirror!" So V whips out the Swiss Army Compact.

Pandora's true face, of course, is hideous, and once revealed, her control of her minions is lost. V follows up with the Crescent Beam Finishing Move, and the youma blows apart into messy splorge, which drips and sprays everywhere. Ewwwwwwwww. ("Not bad for your second day of work, is it?" "This definitely rates about a 9.0 on my weird-shit-o-meter.")



Aftermath
Everyone is restored to normal, and has no memories of what happened… which means that everyone not in school gets in trouble for skipping. Minako isn't concerned, though—she's got the magic pen to handle the extra homework.

Artemis smacks her on the back of the head and confiscates the pen.
 

Cruton

Retired User
Re: Chapter 1-2: Minako in Crown Game Center

Artemis lays out the basics, that Minako is an incarnation of Venus, Goddess of Love and Beauty (!), and yet is late, lazy, narcoleptic, and—
So pretty much a Greek god?

This conversation also reveals that, at this time, Minako is the only girl who ever comes here on her own, instead of to humor a boyfriend. Obviously that changed by Usagi's time, as word of the cute counter guy got out…
Part of me grooves on the idea of Sailor V as the role model for a whole generation of gamer girls. Part of me recoils in Lovecraftian terror.

Enter Creepy Guy Taku, whose name she just knocked off the board. He accuses her of being a man in disguise, because no woman could possibly play so well. "So take those clothes off!"

…Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.
Gee, what a delightfully awkward read through has become.

And let's just think about that here: Artemis arranged for the development of an entire arcade game prototype, and associated advertising copy, solely for the purpose of a single training lesson for Minako. This boy's got a blank check. "Okay, Minako, for today's survival training, we've rented Okinawa. Yes, the whole island. Now pay attention, damn it!"
Minako: Sailor Senshi training, huh? Cool! So what it's going to be? International tango competitions to build dexterity? Skiing on the alps to help us stay calm under pressure? Oh! Oh! We get blackbagged in the middle of the night by a handsome mercenary company and dumped in the middle of scenic Venice with a few scant clues to guide us to a hotel with an all you can eat buffet, all to hone our crisis management and investigative skills?!

Ami: We jog around the shrine a couple times. Luna drops water balloons on us from the trees.

Minako: ...well, I mean, damn, how much do you spend on the water balloons? Gotta be a lot.
 

Q99

Genderpunk
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Re: Sailor V Chapter 1-3: Sailor V Appears! Channel 44 - Pandora's Plot!

Here's a cool Sailor Moon pic I found, it's all 5 Scout + Mamoru in something of retro style outfits.


Shadowjack said:
bespectacled nerd with a habit of materializing out of nowhere whose name is Amano. (Unlike Umino, he's blond, but it's the same guy.
Hm, does Amano dye his hair...? Normally odd hair colors apply mostly to females and villains.
 

Blazing Bat

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Re: Sailor V Chapter 1-3: Sailor V Appears! Channel 44 - Pandora's Plot!

Minako: "…Well, for starters, the uniform is so uncool."
It's odd that they can have a disguise compact, but not change the uniform.

The Origin of the Sailor V Video Games
Artemis asks the Boss to pull a few strings, and within a couple of days, Artemis arranges for a new game to arrive at the arcade, complete with promotional material and forged shipping orders. (Artemis has to smuggle the packages and shipping crate into the building himself, which is quite a feat for a 10 pound quadraped.)
"Disguise pen! Turn these packages into a conveniently-sized plush mouse!"

And let's just think about that here: Artemis arranged for the development of an entire arcade game prototype, and associated advertising copy, solely for the purpose of a single training lesson for Minako. This boy's got a blank check. "Okay, Minako, for today's survival training, we've rented Okinawa. Yes, the whole island. Now pay attention, damn it!"
In the manga, the scale of the senshi's powers (and support infrastructure, apparently) is much grander than in the anime. One example from the Dark Kingdom storyline: one of Ami's powers never seen in the anime, so if you want to avoid all spoilers for the manga, don't highlight the following.
Spoiler: Show

Girls: "If we fight here, we will blow up the entire block!" (or something along those lines)
Mercury: *hacks the world so the battle is shifted to extradimensional space*


Having arrived late for school again, Minako is assigned massive amounts of English work. However, the magic transformation pen also functions as a pen that always knows the proper answers.
Luna at least was cautious enough never to mention this to Usagi.
 

Kreuzritter

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Re: Sailor V Chapter 1-3: Sailor V Appears! Channel 44 - Pandora's Plot!

Here's a cool Sailor Moon pic I found, it's all 5 Scout + Mamoru in something of retro style outfits.




Hm, does Amano dye his hair...? Normally odd hair colors apply mostly to females and villains.
nay, just as mommy had an army of lovely youma, the dak princess naru weilds an army of demonic nerds
 

The Fireballed Mage

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Re: Sailor V Chapter 1-3: Sailor V Appears! Channel 44 - Pandora's Plot!

shadowjack said:
Having arrived late for school again, Minako is assigned massive amounts of English work. However, the magic transformation pen also functions as a pen that always knows the proper answers.
Luna at least was cautious enough never to mention this to Usagi.
The cat shows much wisdom here. No way to hide a secret identity with that big of a disruption in the space/time matrix.

Usagi: Ha ha! I got an A+ on my mock exam!
Family: !
Teachers: !
Friends: !
Nation: !
Dark Kingdom: !
Usagi: /sweatdrop. Err...


Also, imagine how much vicious in-fighting would happen amongst the senshi if there was one (1) item that would allow one (1) of the five (5) to pass exams.

Worse, imagine the Roar Rampage of Revenge Ami-chan would go on if Usagi ever beat her on an exam...
 

Blazing Bat

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Re: Sailor V Chapter 1-3: Sailor V Appears! Channel 44 - Pandora's Plot!

Worse, imagine the Roar Rampage of Revenge Ami-chan would go on if Usagi ever beat her on an exam...
I think she'd throw Usagi a sad look of pure disapproval and tell her how disappointed she was in her. Followed by a scolding about breaking the rules and cheating. Next, she scolds Luna too for providing the item in question to Usagi. And then, she'll be gentle, but firm and insistent and completely unstoppable as she confiscates the thing.
 

Ashikaider

seeker of things AWESOME
Re: Sailor V Chapter 1-3: Sailor V Appears! Channel 44 - Pandora's Plot!

I think she'd throw Usagi a sad look of pure disapproval and tell her how disappointed she was in her. Followed by a scolding about breaking the rules and cheating. Next, she scolds Luna too for providing the item in question to Usagi. And then, she'll be gentle, but firm and insistent and completely unstoppable as she confiscates the thing.
So she can have perfect test scores all the way to medical school.
 
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