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[IWIW] Walkin' on Sailor Moon (thread 3 of a continuing series)

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Q99

Genderpunk
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This is true.

On the other hand, it also makes Makoto's crushes seem even more depressingly self-fulfilling. "You remind me of the guy who crushed my heart… Wanna go out?"

Oh, well, she'll probably grow out of it. Well, we hope she does, anyway.
Someone (and by 'someone,' I mean Ami. Or maybe one of the others, with some advice. They gotta realize it's not a good thing, right?) has to set her strait about that habit and get Mako dating all healthy-like :)
 
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HeWhoSpeaksOfDarkness

New member
Banned
Plants can fertilize themselves, so I think incest is less of a concern.
lots of plants go to a fair bit of trouble to avoid it though too. I think its really probly a lot like animals, if your linage isn't used to it its really really bad, but if you either produce lots of young, or have had the negative recessives bred out you ok.

but IANAB.
 

Shadowjack

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Hmm. So Doom Trees display K-selection traits but reproduce using an r-selection strategy, with the elves as the larval form. So, really, the loss of their old world was not that tragic at all, it was just a typical swarming event, and the Doom Tree elves that escaped will now plant new colonies.




:p
 

Cruton

Retired User
Hmm. So Doom Trees display K-selection traits but reproduce using an r-selection strategy, with the elves as the larval form. So, really, the loss of their old world was not that tragic at all, it was just a typical swarming event, and the Doom Tree elves that escaped will now plant new colonies.
Are you suggesting "thermo nuclear war" is actually part of a Doom Tree's lifecycle?
 

braincraft

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Banned
'Lifecycle' sounds like something Grimdark Captain Planet rides

Are you suggesting "thermo nuclear war" is actually part of a Doom Tree's lifecycle?
An awesome lifecycle, maybe.


And, you know, it's called the damn Doom Tree. It makes a kind of sense.
 

Evil Midnight Lurker

What Lurks at Midnight
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Are you suggesting "thermo nuclear war" is actually part of a Doom Tree's lifecycle?
Robert L. Forward's Camelot 40K (a novel which has nothing to do with That Game, the K stands for Kelvin) posits a sapient ant-like species which instinctively builds a nuclear bomb under their hive as a scattering mechanism. :eek:
 

Shadowjack

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Sailor Moon Episode R #60: An Angel? A Devil? Mysterious Girl from the Sky.

A ROOM HIGH ABOVE THE CITY
Strange figures look out upon the cityscape from magical portals, arranged about their chamber.

  • A slender, prissy woman, clad in shades of purple.
  • An acrobatic woman in light armor of red and gold.
  • A dark woman in elegant green.
  • A shy bondage bunny in sky blue.
  • A redheaded man, dark muscle top and loose trousers, coat flung casually over one shoulder.

All have caste marks of a black crescent moon, facing downward.

Rubeus, the redhead: "And here we are, everybody. Tokyo, right above the Azabu-Juban District. And as I expected, Tokyo is still a small town."
An acrobatic woman in light armor of red and gold: "Huh. Why, there cain't be more than ten million souls out thar."
A dark woman in elegant green: "And look at those tiny buildings, dahlink! Zey call zis a city?"
Rubeus: "They do."
Koan, a slender, prissy woman, clad in shades of purple: "Whatevew! What awe we waiting fow! Let's find the Silvew Cwystaw and destwoy it!"
Rubeus: "Don't be so impatient. Enjoy the sights."
A shy bondage bunny in sky blue: "Exactement! And remember, we have how-you-say deux goals here: the Silver Crystal, and the Rabbit."
Rubeus: "True. All right, let's do the second one first."
Rubeus: "Oh, and someone engage the cloaking device, please."

We glimpse the outside of their craft—it looks like a giant crystal caltrop, and hangs in the sky like some dark omen of things to come. It disappears from view moments before SDF fighter jets arrive to investigate this UFO report…



TWO LOVERS IN A BOAT ON A POND
Mamoru /sings:

I have two friends, the strangest company,
The gay lighthearted moon, and the willow tree, the sad willow tree…
And when we meet, I notice suddenly,
The moon begins to smile, but the willow tree starts weepin' for me…
Somehow I know, it's about my love,
The willow must doubt my love will ever appear,
And yet the moon seems to say, my love will soon be here
Which one is right? They never quite agree…
The smiling moon, and the weeping willow tree…


Usagi /trails hand in the water and sighs. "You sing wonderfully."
Mamoru: "Thank you."
Usagi: "But if you're Bing, does that make me Hope, or Lamour?"
Mamoru: "Well, Dorothy was the cuter of those two options, but also could actually sing, so… wait, let me think…"
Usagi: "Hoho! The crooner is now the comic."
Mamoru: "Must be lovely in Vermont this time of year. All that snow."
Usagi: "It's lovely here. Say it'll be forever."
Mamoru: "It'll be forever."
Usagi: "Mean it."
Mamoru: "I do. Third lifetime's a charm, right?"
Usagi: "I am feeling lucky for once."
Mamoru: "I admit I'm feeling slightly nervous. The last time I had a date in a boat, killer squirrels attacked."
Usagi: "Well, then let's get out of the boat. Carry me?"
Mamoru: "…Well, er, here, I'll help you onto the pier, here, how about that? 'Carry me.' Riiiiight."
Usagi: "Heh. Oops! I stumbled into your arms anyway. How typically clumsy of me."
Mamoru: "You know, in many ways you are far superior to my cocker spaniel."
Usagi: "We are probably irritating everyone who's single and within earshot right now."
Mamoru: "Should we talk louder?"
Usagi: "I got a better idea."

The kiss is perfect, and seems to last forever…



SUDDENLY!
Usagi: "Oh, how I have grown to hate that word!"

Lightning, winds, strange hissing steams, and with an actinic flash, a little girl falls out of the sky. Her entry bowls over Usagi and Mamoru. As the clouds clear, they note that the little girl:

  • …has pink twintails and red eyes.
  • …is equipped with a plastic toy, that is shaped like a black Lunar cat's head, is equipped with a radio aerial, and seems not be wholly affected by gravity.
  • …is equipped with a curiously-shaped key of obvious Lunar manufacture.

Mamoru: "…"
Usagi: "…"
Mamoru: "That's it! No more boats!"
Usagi: "Beautiful naked men don't just fall from the sky, you know!"
Mamoru: "Hey!" :p
Usagi: "I'm attached, but I'm not dead." ;)
Usagi: "Hey, kid, what's the big idea of trying to cut in on our touchy-feely time? Amscray!"
The Kid /glare.
Usagi: "…Mamoru, the little girl with creepy red eyes is staring at me."
The Kid: "'Mamoru'?"
The Kid: "…"
Usagi: "Uh-oh, she knows your name."
Mamoru: "We're probably safe so long as she doesn't start singing Sinatra."
Usagi: "Okay, girl, where the he— Heck! Heck did you come from?"
The Kid /snotty. "I'm Usagi. What's your name? And why do you have my hairstyle?"
Usagi /double snotty. "I'm Usagi, and that's my hairstyle, and answer the question!"
The Kid: "You're Usagi? In that case…"
The Kid /summons the cat's head to her side…
The Kid /…and transforms it into an M1911 longslide chambered in .45 ACP, which she presses to Usagi's forehead.
The Kid: "The Silver Crystal. Give it to me now."
Usagi /?!?!?!?!?!
Mamoru: "…that's a toy gun, right?"
Usagi: "LOOKS REAL FROM THIS ANGLE!"
The Kid: "Move and the girl dies."
Mamoru /!
Usagi: "…the girl does not know what you are talking about."
The Kid: "Do not pretend. I know Usagi Tsukino has it."
Usagi: "Well, Usagi Tsukino doesn't know she has it, so go jump in the pond."
The Kid: "As you wish."
Usagi: "Mamoru, I lo—"

BANG!!!

Mamoru /?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!!??!?!!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!!!?!?!?!!!?!!!?
Usagi: "…Ow?" /pulls suction dart off of face.
Mamoru: "WHAT THE HELL WAS—?!"

But the kid has disappeared…

CUE: Creepy music.



TSUKINO RESIDENCE
Usagi /stumbles in, exhausted from adrenaline shock. "Razzin-frazzin, ruined a perfect date, freakin' bizarre creepy alien communist gangster robot girl—"
Usagi /opens bedroom door.
Usagi's bedroom has been thoroughly ransacked.
Usagi: "…"
Usagi /storms downstairs.
Usagi: "SHINGO! You are dead meat!"
Dad /?
Shingo: "Whatever it is, I didn't do it!"
The Kid /materializes behind Shingo. "He was here all the time!"
Usagi /boggles.
Mom /brings in tea and cookies. "Oh, hello, Usagi! Your cousin is going to be living with us, starting today. How was your date?"
Usagi: "…"
{Usagi has left the scene.}



TSUKINO RESIDENCE
Usagi /checks the house number.
Usagi /checks the address on her ID.
Usagi /checks her pulse and vision.
Usagi /deep breath, and goes back inside.
Usagi: "I'm sorry, could you say that part again?"
Mom: "How was your date?"
Usagi: "No, no, the other part."
Mom: "Your cousin—"
Usagi: "Right. That part. Grandparents, yes, crazy uncle Hiro, yes, but I DON'T HAVE ANY DAMN COUSINS!"
Shingo: "Oh, come on, Usagi, don't be stupid. Don't tell me you don't remember?"
Dad: "Yes, you remember little cousin Usagi, who visited us last New Year's and all those other times?"
Usagi: "All right, smart guy, if she's a relative, then what kind of cousin? Maternal or paternal? What degree? Who are her parents?"
Dad: "Er… well, she's… um…"
Mom: "Oh, honestly dear, sometimes you're as bad as your daughter. She's… um… er…"
Usagi: "A-HA! I'm not just taking crazy pills here!"
Mom: "Oh, come on, there's photos right here in the family album. See? In all those pictures with you."
Usagi: "SHE HAS NATURALLY PINK HAIR! SHE'S NOT HUMAN!"
Mom: "Calm down, dear."
Usagi: "SHE'S A WITCH! BURN HER! SHUN HER! SHUNNNNN!"
The Kid: "You're silly! Tee-hee."
Usagi: "…"
Usagi: "Right. Can't be helped." /rolls up sleeves. "Youma in my house, gotta cleanse it myself, I guess. MOO—"
Luna /significant glance, sidelong look, toss of head.
Usagi: "—OONNNNnnnnow I'm gonna take a bath. With my cat. Who also needs a bath. Excuse me."



BATH TIME
Usagi /hurriedly fills Luna in.
Luna: "Sheesh, I leave the house for a day to get a little 'me' time, and everything goes to pot."
Usagi: "You got back just in time. Dude, she's MIND-CONTROLLING my family! What the hell?"
Luna: "You sure she's not a relative? There is a family resemblance."
Usagi: "BULL."
Luna /touches paw to nose. "No, CAT. Well, then they got the smell and vibrations right, which most magic disguises miss, which suggests an incredible level of skill and attention to detail. And I don't recognize the energy signature… hmmm. Pink hair, too…"
Usagi: "Well?"
Luna: "…beats me. But she knew your names, and about the Crystal?"
Usagi: "Held a gun to my head for it!"
Luna: "A fake gun."
Usagi: "I didn't know that at the time! What do I do?"
Luna: "Play it cool and play along. Admit nothing. She'll slip up and show her true colors soon enough. And meanwhile—"
Usagi: "—yeah, yeah, you and Artemis will investigate on the side. Luna, you're too passive!"
Luna: "I'm—?"
The Kid /materializes in the bath. "Surrender the Crystal."
Usagi /screams like a little girl and just about jumps through the wall.

Thrashing and splashing ensues, spraying water over everything in the room.

Luna /is not technically in the room. "Hmm. Whoever she is, she's obviously not trained in unarmed combat, or actually trying to kill Usagi… But this still makes no sense. An infiltrator should be subtle."
Mom: (calls) "You'd better mop that all up, you two!"



•*BED TIME
Luna: "Tough it out. You can be more irritating than her in your sleep. If she could hurt you, she would've done it by now."
Usagi: "…Luna, you always know just how to comfort a person."
Luna: "Oh, go dream about that Mamoru of yours."
Usagi: "Thank you, I will!" :)
Usagi: "Wait, there's something stuck in my pajamas—"
The Kid /pokes head out of Usagi's pajamas. "Where did you hide—?"
Luna /boggles.
Usagi: "YAAAAGHGGHGERROFFFME!!!"



A MINUTE LATER
Usagi's family, just woken up, looks through the bedroom door, to see Usagi, half-in, half-out of her pajamas, throwing everything that comes to hand at the Kid, while Luna tries to wrestle the suspiciously-active cat head toy into submission.

Mom: "IT'S THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT WHAT ARE YOU TWO DOING?"
The Kid /sniffle. "Big Sis is being mean to me!"
Usagi: "…Oh, not that routine. Even I never resorted to the crocodile tears guilt trip. I will not go easy on you for that one, whoever you are."
Shingo: "We're right here, you know. Can hear you."
Dad: "Usagi, she came to Tokyo all by herself because her parents can't be with her."
Mom: "She's probably very lonely—"
Usagi: "ALL RIGHT! ALL RIGHT! Yes, I'm a big ogre! I made a little girl cry! Yes! I get it! But the big ogre sleeps alone!"
Usagi /shoves everyone out of the room and moves a dresser in front of the door.

Luna /returns through the window. "That might not work, if she can teleport."
Usagi: "Then you'll have to stand watch, Luna!"
Luna: "ME?"
Usagi: "I have school. I can't stay up all night and sleep all day. Or so you always tell me."
Luna: "Frell. All right." /snaps to. "Cat on patrol."
Usagi: "Thank you."
Luna: "Sweet dreams."
Usagi: "I hope so."



THE DARK OMEN
Koan, the purple: "None of us couwd find hew."
Rubeus, the redhead: "Hum. …Oops, incoming signal from Wiseman. What is it, sir?"
Sorcerer Wiseman: (via hologram) "The Silver Crystal, a stone that brings us much trouble, it is. As long as it exists, cannot destroy the Crystal Tokyo that we HATESSSSS SO MUCH, can we."
?????? the blue: "Is it really here in Juban?"
Sorcerer Wiseman: "In my divination have faith. Yes, without a doubt."
Rubeus: "Then we shall destroy it along with the Rabbit!" /laid-back maniacal laughter.



EMERGENCY SESSION AT THE SHRINE
The team is gathered. Usagi provides Rei with one of the doctored photos, for some divination action. Rei prays up a storm. Finally…

Rei: "…Finished." /considers the picture.
Usagi: "AND?"
Rei: "In this picture—"
Everyone else: "Yes? Yes?"
Rei: "—your kimono is prettier than you are."
Everyone else: "…"
Usagi: "Rei, damn it, this isn't the time for that!"
Rei: "¡Sorry, sorry! But seriously, I find nothing wrong with the picture."

But outside…

The Kid: "Ah, these are Usagi Tsukino's friends. Perhaps one of them is holding it."
Gramps /just happens by, bearing tea and buns. "…Er? Hello, little girl, what are you—?"



STARKLY CORUSCANT TRANSFORMATION SEQUENCE COUNTER
Usagi into Second-Stage Sailor Moon: 8
Usagi into Sailor Moon: 43
Usagi into Princess Serenity: 1
Usagi into Disguise Form: 9
Ami into Sailor Mercury: 15
Rei into Sailor Mars: 13
Makoto into Sailor Jupiter: 8
Minako into Sailor Venus: 7
Mamoru into Tuxedo Mask: 2
Cat Head into Something-or-Other: 1



VOILA!
The cat head is now a milk bottle.
Gramps: "Cute. Cute trick."
The Kid /spikes the tea.
Gramps: "Hey!"
The Kid /spikes Gramps.
Gramps /K.O.
The Kid: "Sleeping potion. Gets 'em every time."
The Kid /picks up the tea tray…



MEANWHILE, REI'S ROOM
Usagi: "Gosh, I didn't know your psychic power was affected by the time of the—"
Rei: "NOW YOU'RE BEING MEAN."
Usagi: "Revenge! Sweet revenge. Play nice and I'll wear more pretty dresses for you."
Rei: "DIEEEEEEEE."
Ami: "But seriously, folks."
Minako: "Maybe you're overthinking this, Usagi."
Makoto: "Yeah, I mean, we've triumphed over many obstacles, your relationship with Mamoru is finally working out…"
Rei: "Maybe with nothing to worry about, you're trying to find something to worry about."
Usagi: "THAT IS NOT TRUE."
Rei /bats eyelashes. "¿Are you sure?"
Ami: "If you want something to worry about—"
Everyone else: "Entrance exams."
Ami: "—you should worry abou— Yes, entrance exams. Sigh. Am I that predictable?"
Makoto: "Yes, but we don't mind."
Usagi /holding head in hands. "Guys, guys, guys, remember that conversation we had once about stock plotlines that irritated us in TV shows?"
Minako: "Oh, yeah! I remember. We were watching the Kamen Rider marathon."
Usagi: "Right, and the one we all really hated was the one where all sorts of weird stuff is happening to one of the heroes, and even though the other heroes have all encountered really weird stuff before, for some reason this episode they decide that the other guy must be making it all up, and go out of their way to find 'innocent explanations' for the weirdness, or accuse him of playing pranks, and it takes all episode before they realize that, yes, the victim really was being attacked by gremlins or framed by the villain's illusion magic, or whatever?"
Ami: "Yeah, I remember. That's a really irritating plotline, because you always see it from the victim's point-of-view, and empathize, and wonder why the others don't even admit the possibility."
Usagi: "Right! Exactly! And do you remember what we discussed afterward?"
Makoto: "Oh, right! That because we deal with that sort of thing all the time, we should all make sure that we never play jokes along those lines, and if one of us came to the others with a crazy story, that rest of us wouldn't dismiss it out of hand, but would instead follow it up, just in case, because real lives are on the line and all, and we should be smarter than TV characters. Is that what you mean?"
Usagi: "Yes! Exactly!"
Rei: "¿And your point is…?"
Usagi /holds out hands, smiles, promptingly.

Pause.

…that stretches out…

Usagi: "…that apparently tokusatsu shows are more true-to-life than I ever thought."
'Gramps': "Hello, pretty ladies! I hope I'm not interrupting anything!"
Rei: "…He says, as he peeks through the door without knocking."
'Gramps': "I thought I'd offer you and your lovely young friends some refresh—"
Rei: "¡Yes, yes, shoo! ¡Shoo! ¡Private conversation!"
'Gramps': "Well, if any of you ladies are interested in a private conversation later with someone with lots of life experience—"
Rei: "¡Out! ¡Shoo! ¡Thank you for the tea, yes! ¡Shoo! ¡Venga!" /slams door.
'Gramps': "Such cruel treatment from my own flesh and blood, oh…" /walks off.
Rei: "Sheeeeeeesh. Bad enough I have to chase him off of the petitioners, without having to have him ogle you guys."
Everyone else: "It's cool." "Not your fault." etc.
Usagi /starts eating. "Hey, at least he brought the good dumplings."
Everyone else: "…"
Usagi: "…There's the quick and the hungry, guys. You gonna join me?"
Everyone else /chuckles, and reaches for the plate.
Rei: "¿Tea?"
Ami: "Please." /sips.
Minako: "Sure!" /sips.
Makoto: "Mm. Smells good." /sips.
Rei: "Tastes good, too." /sips.
Usagi: "Juf' a fecon'." /mouth too full.
Everyone else /K.O.
Usagi /?!
Usagi /spit-take.



A MINUTE LATER
The Kid /steps into the room. "Excellent."
The Kid: "Wait a minute." /counts bodies. "One, two, three, four—"
Usagi: "—ninja."
The Kid: "…Ninja doesn't come after four?"
Usagi: "GOTCHA, POISONER!" /seizes the Kid.
The Kid /!
Usagi: "Right! No more Ms. Nice Girl! If you want to appear like a bad little kid, demon, then I'm gonna treat you like one. TALK!"
The Kid: "No!"
Usagi /spanks the Kid. "One!"
The Kid /!
The Kid: "…No!"
Usagi /spanks the Kid. "Two! TALK!"
The Kid /!!
The Kid: "NO!"
Usagi /spanks the Kid. "Three! TALK, DAMN YOU!"
The Kid /!!!
The Kid /starts to cry.
Usagi: "Ever heard about the kid who cried wolf? Crocodile tears, Francine!" /spanks the kid. "Four!"
The Kid /screams.
{A Lunar caste mark appears on the Kid's forehead and shines brilliantly.}
Usagi: "…Uh-oh."



MEANWHILE, A KILOMETER OR TWO AWAY
Koan, the purple, has been engaged in the following brilliant plan: examining every single small child in the search area for a caste mark, one by one. At this point, she's collected a small crowd on the playground, and the yard duty is trying to wave her off.

Random Kid #1: "Are you a time traveller?"
Koan: "No, of couwse not!"
Random Kid #2: "Then why are you dressed so dorky?"
Koan: "Why awe you, pipsqueak?"
Random Kid #2: "My mother dressed me like this! What's your excuse, lady?"

Suddenly! A pillar of light erupts from a shrine a short distance away.

Koan: "…Bingo."



MEANWHILE, BACK AT THE SHRINE
Usagi /cowers in the corner, having learned a valuable lesson about the actual effectiveness of 'field expedient interrogations.'
The Kid /finally stops glowing and settles down, only sniffling a little.
Usagi: "…Who are you?!"

Suddenly! A purple-clad stranger bursts in, dramatically!

The Kid /!
Usagi: "And who are you?!
Koan: "I'm heaw to kill the Wabbit!" /points at the Kid.
Usagi: "'Kill the Wabbit'?"
Koan: "Kill the Wabbit!"
Usagi: "'Kill the Wabbit'?"
Koan: "Kill the Wabbit!"
Usagi /rolleyes. "…'Kill the Wabbit'."
The Kid: "Don't let her get me!"
Usagi: "And, er, who is the great warrior who will achieve this mighty task?"
Koan: "I, Koan, youngest of the fouw Phantom Sistews!"
Usagi: "'Fandom Sisters'? Killer cosplayers?"
Koan: "…Fow that, you die fiwst." /spits blue flame.
Usagi /dodges!
{Rei's manga shelf has been set on fire!}
Usagi: "You… you dressed-up tart! Rei is going to murder me!"
The Kid /takes the opportunity to dart from the room.
Koan /pursues. "Come back hewe!"
Usagi /snaps fingers. "Hey… dat was the Wabbit!"
Usagi: "Frell. I'm gonna have to save the brat, aren't I?"



STARKLY CORUSCANT TRANSFORMATION SEQUENCE COUNTER
Usagi into Second-Stage Sailor Moon: 9
Usagi into Sailor Moon: 43
Usagi into Princess Serenity: 1
Usagi into Disguise Form: 9
Ami into Sailor Mercury: 15
Rei into Sailor Mars: 13
Makoto into Sailor Jupiter: 8
Minako into Sailor Venus: 7
Mamoru into Tuxedo Mask: 2
Cat Head into Something-or-Other: 1



OUT ON THE SHRINE GROUNDS
<< Koan casts Blue Flame! >>
<< ?????? is down! >
The Kid: "Mommy, Daddy, HELP ME!"

Suddenly! Sailor Moon bursts in, dramatically!

Usagi: "It is a well known psychological fact that people's behavior is affected by the way they dress!"
Koan /man what
Usagi: "For instance, if we alter this young lady's attire to something a little more, uh, romantic, certain changes in attitude may perhaps be detected! In other words, it's not your fault you're acting like some psychotic child-stalking trollop, dear. I'm sure you'd be perfectly tolerable in a nice pants-suit or something."
Koan: "You cheeky wittle bitch."
Usagi: "That's Sailor Moon, cheeky bitch of Love and Justice, to you!"
<< Koan casts Blue Flame! >>
< Usagi dodges! >
<< Koan casts Dark Fire! >>
< Flames rain from the sky! >
< Usagi dodges, barely! >
< …the ground is now on fire! >
UsagI: "What, all of it?! OW! OW! OW!"
Koan: "BWAHAHAHA! So wong, Sailow Whatevew." /turns around to—
Usagi /jumps above the flames and onto the shrine wall.
Usagi /runs along the shrine wall.
Usagi: "BODY SLAM!"
<< Usagi : Attack > Koan >>
< Koan faceplants! >
< Usagi makes her DEX check: perfect landing! >
Usagi: "Two points!"
Koan /spitting out turf. "Mah node! Ya ga diwt up ma node! Ma make-u' i' ru-id! Ya bidch! I'm goi'g to teaw ya inda pieces!"
Usagi /blows a raspberry. "Just try it, Doc!"
<< Koan casts—



SUDDENLY!
Enter Tuxedo Mask, dramatically, armed with +3 throwing roses.
Mamoru: "Passionate fire is noble and beautiful. But evil fire to burn someone to death is ugly and horrifying."
Koan: "Awe you gonna fight, or tawk me to death?"
Usagi: "No, he just distracts you so I can gank you from behind. BONK!"
<< Usagi : Cast > Halation : Koan >>
Usagi /shoulders her Scepter. "And that's all she—"
< Koan dodges! >
Usagi: "…Dude."
Koan: "I'ww make you pay! You'ww aww pay!"
{Koan has left the scene.}



AFTERMATH
Mamoru: "Sigh. Another enemy."
Usagi: "Thanks for the assist, handsome."
Mamoru: "Did you drop this? Because I'm not keeping it." /picks up the exhausted/unconscious/sleeping Kid.
Usagi: "I get the feeling this is all some horrible misunderstanding on her part. That lady definitely wasn't one of the good guys, while the kid got worked. If she was really out to get me, she'd have come loaded for bear."
Mamoru: "But the kid knows our real names, so wherever she comes from, she—"
The Kid /snuggles up to Mamoru and mumbles, "Daddy…"
Usagi /bemused.
Mamoru: "…"
Usagi: "You okay? You just spaced out."
Mamoru: "…I just had one of my visions."
Usagi: "Uh-oh."
Mamoru: "A great city of crystal… something on a high spire… no, within the…"
Mamoru: "…It's gone now."
Usagi: "Oh, shit, I just got it. She's me, from the future."
Mamoru: "…A much smaller and pinker future, evidently."
Usagi: "Well, can't be me from the past, we've already been there."
Mamoru: "Maybe she's from some planet where we're worshipped as gods. Hence the hair-do and name; she's an acolyte of the Goddess."
Usagi: "What a horrifying thought. Though the purple lady said she was a 'Fandom Sister,' so maybe there's something in that."
Mamoru: "I just don't know. But I've got a bad feeling about this."
Usagi: "Ditto, dear. Ditto."



THE DARK OMEN
Rubeus, the redhead: "'Sailor Moon'? Never heard of her."
Koan, the purple /repairing her face. "Yes, and an awfuwwy pwetentious man named 'Tuxedo Mask.'"
Rubeus: "Ho-hum, unexpected interference. Okay. We can work with that. At least we know we're in the right place."



DENOUEMENT
Usagi /gently lays the Kid in her own bed.
Luna: "So it seems she's been through tough times."
Usagi: "I guess so. You know, if she'd told me everything up front, I'd have been a lot more sympathetic."
Luna: "I'm telling you there's a family resemblance."
Usagi: "Distant ancestor from the future."
Luna: "Distant descendent."
Usagi: "Right. Whatever. Android duplicate, maybe."
Luna: "Or just weird magic to make her seem friendly."
Usagi: "Or just a wacky coincidence, of which there is no shortage in this town."
Luna: "There's probably some obvious answer that we're just too close to the problem to think of."
Usagi: "Well, we've got no choice but to sleep on it, I guess."
Luna: "Er… I'll just sleep over here, shall I?"
Usagi: "What? Why?"
Luna: "You sleep 'large' at the best of times, and now there are two in the bed. And I've slept near small children before. Never again." /shudders.
Usagi: "…Suit yourself."



THE NEXT DAY
Rei: "¡Damn it, Usagi! You and my Grandfather make up that crazy story about some freakish sky child sneaking in here, then set my comic books and the shrine lawn on fire. ¡Your pranks have gone too far!"
Usagi: "…"
Ami /thwap!
Rei: "¡Ow!"
Usagi: "Thank you, Ami."
 
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