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[Let's Play] Vous êtes Napoléon (You are Napoléon)

Uncle Claudius

Villain, villain, smiling damned villain.
Validated User
.... realistic goals be damned.

To quote the man himself, in a different context from this specific event: "When you set out to take Vienna, take Vienna."


Friendly Stranger
Validated User
By a hairbreadth, we decide to negotiate — aggressively. (Really, you *had* to know that in a gamebook about a fellow who turned a republic, nascent as it was, into an empire I was bound to at least refer to the prelogy at some point.)
You go through alpine mountain passes covered in snow and march upon Vienna, having to leave behind 20,000 men to guard Northern Italy. The army of archduke Charles, the best austrian general, stands awaiting you in a strong position, difficult to move around.
Oh, that 'final boss' vibe...

As I remarked earlier, one wonders why they didn't send him against us earlier. I guess they thought they were dealing with an upstart republic whelp.
You need to launch a frontal attack, without skillful maneuvering. As dawn is breaking on a day heavy with anguish and uncertainty, an icy drizzle chills you.

Roll a die.
  • If random chance yields 1, turn to 136.
  • If it yields 2, 3, or 4, turn to 41.
  • If it yields 5 or 6, turn to 91.
Ah, random chance, that ancient deity of war. Its answer is: "2". (Ancient deities tend to be terse. Yeah, I don't think I'm an ancient deity either.)
This time, Austrians will do anything to save their capital city.
Wouldn't they.
Not to mention they are more numerous; from your vantage point you see the long, deep blue columns of the French pushed back, unable to seriously jostle the enemy's defending white ranks. As the afternoon comes, ammunition becomes sparse and you need to retreat. Upon announcing this predictable failure,
Predictable? Now the book is taunting us?
the french government declares intent to give up its claim on the Rhine's left bank and settle for Belgium.
I'm sure I'm speaking for everyone else here by saying that Belgium is fine as it is and settling for it is like settling for A Night at the Opera when you want to listen to a Queen album. (And no, I'm not Belgian.)
Moreover, this time it forwards you an order to let the Austrians have Venice.
I have an idea! Let's hand over Venice to the Austrians.
The peace agreement is quickly reached. You still come back home to Paris as a brilliant general, your popularity intact, although the triumph is not quite what you expected.

Turn to 389.
Ah well, it might have gone better, but it's quite far from a disaster. Congratulations everyone!
Your return in Paris is a tremendous personal success. Even those who fear you cannot help feeling some kind of admiration about you. But despite popular enthusiasm and the early support of a few men of influence such as Talleyrand, the time has not come yet to seize power.
A ashimbabbar had misgivings about Talleyrand, but apparently we can trust him. For now.
The Directors themselves have no wish to see you remain idle and immediately grant you command of the Army of England, with which France still is at war. Can the Channel be crossed by a whole army despite de Royal Navy's obvious superiority, which lets it blockade french ports and makes it all the more capable of tearing to pieces a slow landing flotilla?
Y'know, with all this final boss feeling that archduke Charles gave me, I get the notion that England is the next level. (And memories of the first Street Fighter game make me wonder if we'll eventually get to Thailand.)
You inspect cities and ports, ask questions of seamen, fishermen and smugglers.
  • If you eventually come to the opinion that with favorable weather and some measure of luck, the attempt can succeed, therefore recommending a landing in England, turn to 4.
  • If, on the contrary, you think that even though a french army can, with a lot of luck, land more or less undamaged in England, it will be plagued with serious difficulties about receiving equipments and ammunition when facing resolute english forces, and so give up the notion of attacking the island, turn to 43.
  • If, lastly, you do believe that a direct attack on England is too dangerous but still insist on leading a spectacular expedition, and propose to send an army to Egypt — theoretically part of the turkish empire, but in actuality an independent country — which England will sooner or later seize to protect its important trade with India if France doesn't get there first, turn to 82.
So, how do you propose to deal with England? Directly, indirectly, or by ignoring them?
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"Two Sheds"
RPGnet Member
Validated User
I think Egypt is the best option. We shall not have our own operation Sealion.


Hail Tzeentch!
Validated User
If the Royal Navy is intact then you cannot invade England. We're amazing, but we're not God.

Go to Egypt first. Conquer it, become a Pharaoh, then we'll be God.


Registered User
Validated User
Obviously, the best way to attack England is to attack Egypt (82) as a stepping stone to seizing its holdings in India.

A Mar-Egypt
F GOL C A Mar-Egypt.*

(Yes, I know)
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