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Road Rebels (re:Worst Game Ever)

Lizard

Global Village Grouch
Validated User
Road Rebels
I've mentioned this gem a few times, mostly as an example of the least competent writing I've seen in a professional game. Some folks dare to question my nomination of it as a 'bad game'. I hereby provide evidence.

From page 1:

We learn of the environmental catastrophes that doomed the Earth:"It was the year 2010 when the fires stopped burning. They ceased to burn only when there was nothing left to burn. Nothing but a shattered rain forest and an expanding city. (deletia) Without vegetation the earth was no longer able to reproduce oxygen."

(Remember that -- no oxygen. We also have the fact that the lack of the ozone layer causing global warming(?). But I wish to remind you: NO OXYGEN. But, still..)

"As things grew worse the human population was still increasing at a rapid rate." More stuff, including a thick cloud of smog which blocked the sun, producing acid rain, and the fact that "All of The fuel resources in the gulf had been used up."

More stuff. Several hundred years later, though, "Now fuels are manufactured from crops, certain trees such as eucalyptus, and orange, and from sewage, and dumps."

Now, remember:
No forests.
No oxygen.
The entire Earth...sorry, "earth"...covered in acid fog.

But, several hundred years later, there's "eucalyptus, and orange"...enough to produce fuel?

Towards the end of page 1, we are reminded of "toxic waist (sic) dumping by the Exzon(sic) Raldez (sic)". This caused animals to mutate. Or maybe the animals are actually aliens, who consider "human's (sic) inferior." "This is possibly due to our white skin" (Hmm...a Rahowa fan?) "where their skin is green or some other color, or that they are just smarter." "Now it is just one race the human race against a stronger opponent." (Lack of commas in original)

This is all PAGE ONE, folks. And I'm barely hitting the high points.

So we've got Captain Planet meets Mad Max meets Mars Attacks, and we're not even to PAGE TWO.

On page two, we learn this is a "roll playing game". This spelling is used throughout the book.

On page three, we get this McCracken-esque statement.

"Many roll playing games are created by a bunch of dead head geeks who care more about making money than a decent game. They have about as much personality as a dried up horse turd. In this game you'll find a lot of personality. It may be crude or strange but it's better than dried up horse turds."

Well, uhm, no one can deny that this game has 'personality'.

Now we play the 'open to a random page and see how long it takes to find a spelling or grammar error'. Please note the game is not "IS there such an error?", just, "how long does it take to find one?".

Page 122. 12 seconds. "Weather or not the characters..."

Page 148: 3 seconds. I can't even parse this one: "RamAir Mk5 twin turbo this turbo has a waistgate that of 2 different positions may be selected requires max flow intakes, headers, and turbo heads note that turbo charger will effect power ,fuel usage, torque and pressure even when it is not activated position 1A and 2A are for chart 1 on vehicle sheets 1B and 2B are for chart 2 on the vehicle specification sheet"

The sentence sort of stops there. There's no actual period.

The tables all use a proportional, not fixed-width, font, but the author couldn't lay them out so they lined up properly, making them very hard to read.

Is there a decent GAME under all this? Maybe. I confess to never having got past the writing.

(BTW, following a law more universal than gravitation, there will spelling and grammatical errors in this post. Whenever you flame someone else's spelling and grammar, you will screw up your own. It is an absolute. But bear this in mind: I'm not charging you money to read this message.)
 

kamikaze

The Man in Black
Lizard said:
Road Rebels
Is there a decent GAME under all this? Maybe. I confess to never having got past the writing.
Okay, the writing is very bad. But that's merely cosmetic (maybe a Tammy Faye Bakker-level of cosmetics, but you can get rid of most of it with a sand-blaster).

I think you're going to have to take one for the team, figure out the rules, play a game, and write a review. It's the only way to see if it really matches up to Synnibarr's level of badness.
 

Ben Brown

Crime-Fighting Gorilla
Validated User
Re: Re: Road Rebels (re:Worst Game Ever)

kamikaze said:


Okay, the writing is very bad. But that's merely cosmetic (maybe a Tammy Faye Bakker-level of cosmetics, but you can get rid of most of it with a sand-blaster).

I think you're going to have to take one for the team, figure out the rules, play a game, and write a review. It's the only way to see if it really matches up to Synnibarr's level of badness.
Don't you dare! If he does a playtest, I'm sure to be one of his victims. Um, playtesters.
 

Marco

Registered User
Validated User
Re: Re: Road Rebels (re:Worst Game Ever)

kamikaze said:

I think you're going to have to take one for the team, figure out the rules, play a game, and write a review. It's the only way to see if it really matches up to Synnibarr's level of badness.
There's no 'I' in Team, buddy. If Lizard runs a game he should do it on line and you'll have to play too!

-Marco
 
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