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[WIR] TMNT/After the Bomb/Road Hogs


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The Leg of the Ninja
The Leg of the ninja? Fucksake.

Media Reports: None

Inside Information: Characters with underworld contacts may learn of a smuggling operation working out of a shipping company called "State Transports."
The password "Snakey sent me" (ok) grants access to the illegal side of the operation.

GM Information: The Leg (I can't type that with a straight face) are a ninja clan who work in smuggling instead of espionage and assassination. The current leaders of the American branch are basically incompetent, (they "lack the brilliant foresight of the founders", although it's not clear what they did that was so great). If they keep screwing up they might get replaced by real ninja from the Japanese branch. (Holy Orientalism, Batman!)

Clues and Encounters: The PCs will inevitably run into smugglers loading or unloading in unusual places (They will? What if they have better things to do than wander around dark alleys looking for trouble? Or some kind of systematic plan for locating crimes or things to intervene in). Upon seeing people loading a truck in an unexpected area, they will then violently assault the teamsters involved. (Ummmm.... what? It's not like they're tossing armloads of rocket launchers into the back. Stuff will be in boxes and crates with innocuous labels, and innocent people load and unload trucks in all kinds of areas at every hour of the day and night). So, when they leap out to terrorize some truckers, Ninjas will jump out of the shadows and attack (except that according to the next bit, the Teamsters should be ninjas too). So, assuming they beat down 2-6 ninja assassins and 'capture' the smugglers (this is really sounding like Heroes Unlimited talk, where the PCs are costumed humans with a place in society instead of unnatural freaks lurking in the sewers), the Leg will put out a $10000 bounty on them and add more ninjas to the shipments. Then the PCs fight increasing numbers of ninjas until they're high enough level to tangle with the bosses: Long Strike, The Tiger of the East, and The Black One (Really?!)

Ninja Henchmen
There are 1200 Ninja Assassins posing as teamsters, shipping clerks, etc. in smuggling operations throughout the world (that's a pretty small number to cover the entire globe; they can't possibly bring too much strength to bear on the PCs without stripping their other locations. Also, why's the American branch in charge of global operations, what about the competent Japanese branch?). They are usually Anarchist or Miscreant, have 5d6 HP and SDC (average 17 each), Hand to Hand Assassin at 2nd level (no general experience level is noted) and one random ninja WP. They also have Gymnastics, and Prowl, Climb, Pick Pockets, Pick Locks and Escape Artist at fairly low levels. Their average age os 25, and half of them have some kind of juvenile criminal record. They normally work in hit squads of 1-5, but will come out in bigger numbers for harder targets.

Ninja Teachers
Are 26 (sic) years old, have 5th level Assassin or 4th level Ninjutsu and the same skills as the henchmen that they're much better at, plus Bodybuilding. They have WP shuriken and roll twice on a table of paired or two-handed weapons. They carry their 'main' weapon, however that's defined, and 12 shuriken (It's not clear to me how 25 year old henchment graduate into this, or why they forget their previous WP when they do, but here it is.) They're Anarchist and have 8d6 (28) HP and 9d6 (32) SDC. They appear with 2d6 henchmen or in larger groups with more minions.

Long Strike
is a pseudonym of Kenu Kametsu, a Miscreant 6th level Assassin who runs domestic operations for the US Leg. He's dim, weak-willed, and unpleasant. Also kinda ugly according to his PW of 8 (I assume that's meant to be PB, but damn if I know how it happened). He's fairly strong, but otherwise basically has crap attributes all around. He's only got 28 SDC and 22 HP. He can drive a car and motorcycle, and fly small planes (none of which the ninjas posing as teamsters can do...), and has a variety of appropriate espionage type skills. His weapon proficiences are Manriki-Gusari, Revolver, and Submachinegun. He's a bully and a coward with zero skill at his theoretical job and an opium addiction. If they weren't so addicted to inheritance by family line he'd be dispensed with. He carries a .38 when he thinks there's danger, and keeps a 9mm submachinegun in his office, "further illustrating his cowardice and lack of respect for tradition". (Otherwise known as "Acting like a sensible person who's engaged in a dangerous trade in the modern world" I mean, once again here, if the PCs aren't ninjas too, they'll probably be packing heat themselves, and a buncha jerks with swords and flails are going to go down in a hail of hot lead). If he takes more than two hits in combat he'll try to run away to beg his cousin the Tiger of the West to help him. (Wasn't he the Tiger of the East earlier? Why yes, yes he was). The police know that someone called Long Strike does crimes, but nothing else about him.

The Tiger of the West's real name is Iya Iyama. He is an 8th level Anarchist Ninja Lawyer.(There's some irony in that alignment...) He runs a small law firm as well as overseeing global operations for the U.S. branch (again, how the hell does that work?) He's and expert at surveillance and communications as well as law and a variety of ordinary skills, plus all the usual ninja sneaking stuff. He has Hand to Hand Ninjutsu, WP Daisho, Bisento, Kusarigama and Automatic Pistol. He usually carries a set of daisho stolen from a samurai family over a century ago. They have a standing offer of 200oz of gold for whoever returns them, but hell if I can see how the PCs would ever learn about that. He also has his own family heirloom kusari gama that has +2 to hit and damage but he never uses if he has a choice. There's an antique bisento and a 9mm pistol in his office that he'll use if attacked there, and pistols in his car and home. He has +15 damage in hand to hand combat despite his modest +2 to strike. He never enters a conflict he's not certain he can win, and generally avoids risks in his personal and business life and will run if a fight turns against him. This is portrayed as a flaw. US law enforcement has never heard of him, but his pseudonym is known to many East Asian police forces. (So isn't he the competent leader sent from the Japanese branch? I'm confused.)

The Black One is a "legendary figure in law enforcement circles" generally believed to be dead. His real identity, Miso (REALLY?!) Kufuni, is wanted for assorted crimes during and shortly after WWII. He is a 19th level ninja despite levels only going to 15, and has Hand to Hand Ninjutsu and various WPs . He also uses "Lee Kwan Choo" (REALLY?!?), a fictitious Chinese martial art that doesn't do any damage but stuns opponents for 1d6 rounds on a 15+ and lets him "leap away from combat" at +16 and leap 20". He can use either his Lee Kwan Choo bonuses or his ninja bonuses, but not both at once. He can switch between them at the beginning of each round. He is currently separated from the Leg because they're bad ninja or something, and lives as a flower arrangement instructor named Sushi Vojimbo (FUCKING REALLY?!??!?!??)
In the text it says he's a 14th level ninja, so maybe that 19 in his statblock is a typo, and also 8th level in Lee Kwan Choo, which [insert orientalist bullshit here]. It's super defensive and practitioners swear to never hurt anyone, even though he totally will.

He pops up out of nowhere because he's too badass to ever be detected sneaking, and uses his 28 MA to impress the PCs so they have to listen to him unless they roll over 94% on percentile (i guess that's how that works. I like how ME is totally irrelevant to this roll) for up to three rounds. If the PCs have ninja weapons he'll Lee Kwan Choo them for a while to see if they can hit him. If they can, they're worthy and he'll disappear and they can't follow him. If they aren't ninjas or can't hit him, he'll kill them with his Ninjutsu. He has a backstory about why he does this, but it's boring.

Also, maybe when the PCs find "The Black One" it turns out he's their old ninja master. What a twist! Gods I hate this character. I hate him so much. He's a racist stereotype and a GM's pet rolled into one, who adds absolutely nothing to the adventure or the world and exists purely to outclass the PCs in every possible way.

Thoughts: this one's bad in a completely different way to the others. It's not focused on genocide or murdering abused children, but it's pretty racist on the face of it, and moreso in many of the details. There's no real plot or background, just "hey, people doing crimes, hey, ninjas, hey, more ninjas, gee where are all these ninjas coming from". Except most of them aren't actually ninjas. There's no reason why the Tiger of Wherever shouldn't be the big boss except to shoehorn in the food ninja. The whole thing again assumes that the PCs are ninjas themselves and that they don't use modern weapons, despite being billed as an adventure/campaign any party can play through. I mean, if you've rolled up a team of highly trained commandos employed by a secret military organization, they're gonna go through these chumps like a hot knife through butter. If you're a buncha self-educated ferals... why the hell would you care about a smuggling operation to begin with? Hell, how would you even be able to tell the difference?


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Thought of this thread today, Phelous posted a cheap electronic children’s tat review for a light gun & light gun activated cow. So when you shoot the gun one of the noises it makes is a guy shouting about “save the hostages!” Thought that was funny.

Tango Samurai

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The reason they're called the Leg is that they have a HAND up on the FOOT Clan.
(MMMWAH!) Goodnight everybody! Tip your server!


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The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
are built with 20 more bio-E than PCs get, because fuck you for wanting to be as cool as canon characters. They do not have a listed Size Level, but at 150 lbs, they are all SL 8. They have full hands, biped, and speech (although it's really hard to see their hands as being as dextrous as human ones given the size and placement of their fingers, but whatever. They can do delicate stuff anyway, it's in the comics), Hold Breath, and Heavy Natural Body armour for AR 12.
Raphael has ninja skills plus Wilderness Survival, Tracking, and Demolitions Disposal. He's 6th level and Anarchist alignment. He's chronically angry and borderline suicidal, and has a 75% chance of going into a berserke rage for several rounds in combat. No actual rules or guidelines are given for this, other than that in that state he's not holding back, and will aim to kill regardless of who's on the other end. Those with HU might use the Frenzy rules there, that grant bonus SDC, damage, attacks, etc. at the cost of indiscriminately attacking anyone that even looks like a threat. Raphael is kept from total self-destruction principally by his friendship with Michaelangelo.

Leonardo is also 6th level, and Scrupulous, an alignment shared by the remaining two. He's the leader when Splinter isn't available, and constantly compares himself to his mentor and beats himself up over every percieved failure or shortfall. He is well read and has skills like Military History, Japanese History and Study: Popular Fiction. He uses Daisho allegedly but the swords are usually drawn the same length.

Donatello is only 5th level because he actually hates violence and would rather be tinkering with electronics than practicing how to kill people. He's more intelligent than Leo, but less wordly and practical. He has lots of tech skills. He prefers a staff because he can minimise how bad he hurts people that way.

Michaelangelo is also 5th level, because he'd rather kick back with a beer and a movie than practice ninjutsu. Not that he doesn't like the rush of a good workout or a good fight, but he also likes good food (he's the main cook), scifi movies, comic books, and all that geeky shit. He is described as the most likely ninja turtle to play a tabletop RPG himself.

Splinter is only SL 5, with full usual features. His combat stats are slightly nerfed because he's getting quite old. He was probably a mutant already before the ooze, because normal rats don't learn ninjutsu by mimesis. Splinter's big thing was defeating Shredder in revenge for his old master's death, now that's done and he's trying to work out where to go from here. Also, he might be dying; who the hell knows how long a mutant rat lives?

After this we get a reprint of the original TMNT origin story, which I can summarise if anyone needs/wants it.

April O'Neil is a computer programmer and ex hacker, and very good at it. Despite this, she's only 1st level. She has Basic Hand to Hand, but is really pretty much useless in a fight. Also she has her father's secondhand store with apartments abover where she and the turtles live.

Baxter Stockman is a roboticist and April's former employer. He took a government contract for pest control robots, then used them to rob banks and planned to hold the city for ransom and maybe kill some people by undermining buildings, pretty much just for shits and giggles. April and the Turtles foiled the second part of the plan, which is why Stockman is undergoing pre-trial psychiatric examination and April is unemployed. He has 0 SDC and no combat skills whatsoever, but the mouser robots do 4d6 with a bite.

Casey Jones has no physical skills, despite his obsessive workout regimen. He lives in a crappy apartment and pays his rent by being the building handyman. His principal social contacts are three TVs tuned to different channels, which has given him an outlook not unlike Ferd's. He's chosen to deal with it by roaming the streets in a hockey mask looking for people he can justify beating the shit out of. He's 3rd level, with Martial Arts and WP Blunt implement. He is Aberrant.

Next: The Foot! Who are completely unrelated to the Leg; how many ninja clans are there in the States, anyway?
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